The lottery winning took place back in August 2014. My husband and I were married in October 2014. It wasn’t a fortune, but enough to make a difference. The winnings were around $500,000. Most people would be over the moon, but I panicked. I didn’t want our life to turn upside down because we had extra money now.

I was still legally single at the time, and so I was able to accept it anonymously without the need to tell anyone else. So I didn’t. Tell anyone else. Not a single soul. Not my husband, my parents, siblings, best friends, etc. Only the state and federal governments.

(My husband has a tendency to spend on things we don’t need and that aren’t going to benefit us in the long run so I didn’t want our money to blown quickly on stupid stuff like cars and clothes.)

I opened a new bank account with a separate bank and put the cheque in. Got started with a financial advisor, who guided me into investing in local businesses and real estate. And that’s that. It’s been sitting there since just growing.

Flash forward to today. I’m doing dishes getting ready to start making dinner, and my phone rings. I can’t get to it but figure I’ll call them back. Then I get a text. No big deal. I’ll get to it in a minute….but my husband came into the kitchen and glanced at my phone to let me know who text me and called me (which he always does if my hands are full).

He called and text me to let me know my account just hit $1 million after one of the energy companies I invested in soared recently.

My husband is stunned. Has no clue what to even say, staring at me until he says “we have a million dollars??” I was so flushed that finally just sat him down and explained the situation. He’s clearly mad at me for never telling him. Asks if my family knows, and I tell him that no one knows except the financial advisor.

It took him a few hours to finally be able to really talk to me.. at the end of the silence he told me he’s proud of me for investing in our future but he needs a few days to clear his head because he feels like I hid a huge part of “myself” from him.

We might just need to take a vacation now.

I get it, money doesn’t literally buy happiness, but it depends on what your definition of happiness is. 99% of people’s definition of happiness is something that you have to pay for.

Like if you have to travel anywhere to feel happy you are spending money in some capacity. Whoever says that money can’t buy happiness literally doesn’t know what life is like without money. If you don’t have a lot of money, then having money will make you happy, but if you have been in an environment where you’ve had money all of your life, then it won’t buy happiness. I’d rather be unhappy on a private jet than trying to worry about rent.

• For lower-income people, the increase in money is buying financial stability (reducing financial insecurity), which is the cause of much unhappiness. Once that is eliminated, money really can’t buy happiness

• As a person that was unemployed and scored a 120k job this year.. yeah, it makes a big goddamn difference

• I think the key is “enough money”. A happy working-class family has enough to be happy, even if they can’t afford luxury trips

• If you’re poor like most, if you get a little bit of money it is rewarding and life-enhancing. Then if you go up a rank and get even more money coming in, people start comparing themselves to others. They are happy to be getting more money than most, but the upward trajectory of their income, means they start comparing themselves to millionaires.

• This is how I see it. I was not the most happy when I held the highest paying job of my entire life. Money opens doors. But it does not guarantee happiness.

• Having money can take away money related stresses which will make you happier, but it doesn’t “add” happiness beyond that point like say a loving partner would. I earned less than $20k but didn’t have much money related stress as a uni student and I was just as happy as I am now with a decent salary after graduating. If I was earning <$20k with two kids I definitely wouldn’t have been so happy.

I (24f) am completely over my husbands (24M) laziness in bed. We’ve been together for 3 years married for about 7 months now. We only recently started living with each other but our bedroom issues have been going on, on and off for majority of our relationship. I like to experiment and love pleasing my husband. I’ve probably done almost everything in the book to satisfy him and have opened him up a lot, and got him into things he would have never known he even liked. He thinks our intimacy is amazing. I have never finished.

Every time we have this conversation he gets upset and says I think he’s a horrible lover, pouts for a few days or weeks. Then will ask me in detail what I want from him. He’s very submissive now so he hates initiating so I’ve given up on that even though I’d really like him to be, so all I ask is for actual foreplay not just him wanting me to give him head and then go straight into the act. He’ll listen and start doing what I want once when we have get into it and then he falls back into his old habits and just keeps wanting head. If I complain or get upset, we don’t do it unless I get over myself and initiate it.

So after the last fight I was willing to have on the subject with him. I decided to go online and buy all the toys I’ve wanted but always put off buying, as well as some bondage items, etc. I didn’t tell my husband because he’s really awkward about me using toys, he feels like I should get off to him naturally and using toys is insulting to him so I never experimented with them. Thing is I don’t plan on using them with him. I brought them for myself so I can finally get the pleasure I’ve been asking for since I started exploring. We have a joint account so I knew he would see the charge eventually and question me.

Well two nights ago he saw the charge and approached me. I told him what I brought and he completely lost it. I told him that I don’t think it’s fair how he gets to experience all the pleasure during our intimacy and when it comes to me gets lazy. He told me I’m being dramatic and why am I with him if I hate our intimacy that much. He says he’s not gonna stay in our apartment while I’m using toys on myself every night and be okay with that. I say we can experiment with them together but he doesn’t want to hear it. Eventually he leaves and he doesn’t answer my phone calls or text for the night.

I got a call from his mother yesterday saying that he was at her house and pretty much saying how immature I was to approach a sensitive topic in such a bizarre manner and blow our money on toys. Furious that he even told his mom I told her I’m not discussing this with her, and that he can call me and hung up. We haven’t spoken in two days and he’s still not texting back. Even though I feel like I’m not wrong for wanting more when we sleep together. I feel like I crossed a line and shouldn’t have blown up at him over it. Am I in the wrong?

A netizen shared how he bought a $300 bottle of scotch for his friend as a surprise gift but his girlfriend then opened it and ruined the surprise.

Here is the story

I bought my best friend of 15 years a decently expensive birthday gift and his girlfriend opened it
I spent $300 on my best friend’s favorite scotch and his gf opened it and the card I wrote him. It seems silly but I’m annoyed.

Would this annoy you?

I took time out of my only day off to buy a present, wrap a present and write a card all for the purpose of it being a nice surprise for my buddy once he got off work.

And his gf straight up opened everything. Am I being selfish?

Scotch isn’t a long term gift so it was important to me that the “surprise factor” was there.

Netizens’ comments

• I think you’re justified in feeling a little annoyed and disappointed, but keep things in perspective… this is small peanuts. And ultimately, this is an issue between your friend and his GF. If he’s annoyed, he should raise it with her. I wouldn’t do anything in your position. It’s just not your place.

• I would be slightly annoyed. Sometimes couples seem to morph into one and it takes away from special moments you want to have with the person you’re actually bonded to. Not to say you can’t be friends with their S/O as well, but it’s not the same.

Last week, I was made an Assistant Manager in my profession after spending 9+ years with this company. Over the 9 years, I stayed on while many turned in their letters. I took over more work when there were no replacements. When the promotion eventually came, many sent their well wishes and congratulations, but little do they know that I only received a meagre $150 increment with this promotion.

Feeling absurd and angry at myself for staying loyal when many who have moved on and are already way ahead in terms of pay scale.

Here are what others think:

• Actually all the work you have been doing for them in the past 9 years is AM job scope. Due to lack of people, they just decided to promote you to AM to keep you around, and anyhow entertain you by throwing you the extra $150 increment.Should know better about the company during your 9 golden years there whether they are the cheapskate ones or can really pay. Most importantly, $$$ > job titles these days. (if just compare the two)

• That’s why when my company want to promote me to assistant manager. I told them I’m not ready knowingly the additional workload and stress that come with it. And the increment is also nothing to shout about. I’m happy to remain as a senior.

• You got promoted, time to throw letters. You can put in your resume you’re a AM now. It weights higher

• I worked for a the same for around 9 years. First few years was great as increment was reasonably good but bonus was normal. After the 3rd or 4th year, we all stopped receiving increment and bonus as boss said company not making money. I don’t know why but I kept staying. 2 years before I resigned, I got “promoted” to assistant manager without even knowing until HR told me but no increment, just a change of title on name card and HR issued a letter for my acknowledgmentNot trying to compare, just sharing

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how do you approach a colleague who owes you lunch money?

I have been lunching with colleagues and sometimes involved me footing for the bill first at a restaurant / cafe. While this not usually often, we do treat ourselves at nicer casual restaurants/ cafes at times for a great catch up during lunch.

We all take turns to pay usually – and when I say “We” they are not the same people most of the time, hence the “need” to hang out at better places to have a better ambience to chat. I will usually check how much is my share, and immediately paynow or return cash to the paying colleague (incl of the taxes).

However when it is my turn to pay, I do get episodes of colleagues forgetting to pay me back, and I believe they are genuine, because of busy schedules they forget as they did mention they would do so “later”.

To put the situation into a better context, we are all middle aged adults drawing an average of 5-fig salary, but to me it is still money – though the bill can range between $15-$25. And because we are all adults of certain level and payscale, it seems (very) petty enough of me to ask them about the owed lunch money, worse still we dont really meet daily. I guess it definitely isn’t an issue if I were to say it was a treat from me, but no it’s an AA go-dutch lunch. And I cannot be consoling myself to forget it – take it as a treat when clearly it was not.

How will you approach for someone to pay you back in such a situation? While it can be deemed a small amount, it definitely is not , especially if this happens more than once, and it is also a matter of principle when it comes to such.