Typical start to the story. Fat and ugly child from a rather strict family, never interacted with girls, didn’t have the best time in school and used food to deal with the hurt.
Get to university and still fat, ugly and alone. Decided I might as well pop the v-card at least, pay to see a prostitute and 10 minutes of jack-rabbiting and a broken condom later, still fat though.
But suddenly I want more, though it was short lived I enjoyed it and want to experience it again. Why spend time improving myself though, gaining confidence from talking to women and paying for dates when I can cut out the middleman and just pay a prostitute, why not?
6 years later and I’ve slept with at least 250 women, at one point I was seeing at least 2 or 3 a week, one at a nearby massage parlor and then whoever was available.
Of those 250ish I’d say at least half were without a condom (hated the feel of them and the normal ones were a bit too tight) and I always finished inside. I’d get tested every 3 months and it still amazes me that I never caught anything.
After about 6 years I had a regular that I’d usually see once a week, we’d always over-run our time and chat away afterwards.
She’d describe the house and business she was building back home, how she sends most of her money back to her family and that her plan was to only do this work for another year or so before going back home permanently.
She’d always ask why a nice guy like me didn’t have a girlfriend, I’d point to my belly and we’d laugh. Perhaps it was out of pity, but we began to hang out and she’d never ask for payment. We’d go back to her home and just hang, play games and have a drink.
I began to develop feelings perhaps, or realized that what I wanted wasn’t intercourse necessarily but a relationship. We talked about it and I decided to stop seeing her, I cancelled all my accounts and decided to work on myself.
8 years later and I’ve lost all the weight, become somewhat attractive and got married to a woman I met at a bookshop. We talked about past relationships and I told her I’d only ever been with 2 women. I’ve opened my heart to her and she knows all my secrets, but this is something I’ll take to my grave.
I always did the full-screen tests and before we started dating we both got tested for her peace of mind, nothing has ever appeared. I always used a fake name, a burner phone and I look significantly different now.
What prompted me to make this post is that I decided to look up the regular girl I used to see, not out of a need to cheat but curiosity. She’s still working sadly and I decided not to reach out. With this though, at least my secret is out.
