My wife and I have been married for 3 years and yesterday was our anniversary. We had a nice dinner at our favourite Italian restaurant. After that we exchanged gifts, which we were both excited for since it is both our love language.

I had gotten her a charm bracelet with two charms, one of them being one with an engraving about eternal love, which she had been hinting towards. She was obviously very happy when she opened it.

Then came my turn, and when I opened my “gift”, which was in a gift bag and not even wrapped, it was a 3 pack of underwear from freaking uniqlo and a chunky KitKat.

Needless to say, my reaction was quite underwhelming which she did notice. When she asked, I did let her know how. I was unhappy about the lack of effort she had put towards the gift. Her reasoning was that she thought I would love the gift, since I had casually mentioned a few weeks back that I needed to buy more underwear and because I love that chocolate (which is true).

She then ended her explanation with, “men are just hard to buy for”, which sounds like bs because she’s always gotten me good gifts in the past. Then she cried and said I had ruined the anniversary by acting like an unappreciative a-hole.

Also, just for some background, we both have well paying jobs and she actually makes quite a bit more than me.

I am not just assuming this is both our love language. I know for a fact this is because we’ve talked about this multiple times in the past and even taken the quiz together.

Those people who are telling me I should’ve fake liked the gift. No.

Past gifts always felt more thoughtful and were definitely not underwear and often had more meaning to them.

Like for last anniversary she got us custom his/her keychains.

I’m planning some very expensive renovations for my new home. I asked my gf, who is moving in with me in about 4 months if she would consider helping me pay for them.

Now, I have the ability to pay for them myself, but I figured since she would be living here, maybe she should contribute? She said no. She said that of course she will help pay for furniture for us, and help with the utilities and monthly installment.

But she said that she’s not contributing financially to stuff that’s going to increase the value of the house when she has no financial stake in the house and won’t get any equity for it.

And she said I’m a bad person for even thinking that she would consider it. how am I in the wrong?

The toilet looks like from a 3rd world country and of course, she needs to use the toilet. Or she can use the toilet at the nearest coffee shop.

I’m not talking about renovating decorative stuff. I’m talking about the essentials like a stove, toilet and lights.

Here is what netizens think

• Unless she gets equity/ownership in the property then why would she, I wouldn’t. Put me on title and I’ll help but otherwise no thank you. Honestly I would not want to own property with a non spouse. It creates legal hassles and muddies the water in my opinion.

• You can afford something you want, but instead of just buying the thing you want, you’re worried that down the line, someone else might get to enjoy the thing without paying?

• she is right, if you guys break up , she has to leave and you get the lot. If the house was both yours then no problem but only you own the house so you have to pay.