I have a terminal illness and I regret not having personal relationships
Hi everyone.

I guess this is not really me asking for advice but rather venting and giving advice in a way.

I’m 40 years old and have about 6 months to live (max) as I’m terminally ill with brain cancer.

I have plenty of money and a house and had a great career that I’d spent a lot of time building. The plan was to ease up in my 40s and enjoy life a little but I guess life had other plans 🙂

I am an only child and my parents are dead. I am single and do not have kids. I have a handful of friends and never really stayed in touch with my extended family. I was either too busy or too bored of everyone and never devoted the time to an actual relationship.

And now I’m going to die alone. I am moving into a hospice in the next few weeks where I will spend my last days. Maybe a friend will drop by. But while I wish I didn’t have to go so soon, I also wish I had a wife and kids by my side. A cousin, better friends, people who cared about me. Dying alone is going to be hard. Harder than it would have been.

So what I’m saying is build those relationships. Cherish them. Be tolerant. Give them time to grow. Don’t be like me.

Peace.

How do you handle noises problem in order to sleep.

Context: PIE is just nearby where I stay, I would say about 5-10 mins walk? For the past 6 years everything is normal but somehow since few days ago suddenly the traffic noises became increasingly loud.

Usually I only get to hear the speeding vehicle’s sound if I focus on it but recently it’s just so loud that I am unable to have proper sleep.

I am not aware of any trees being chopped down nearby and not even sure if that’s the cause of it, the hdb I stays at is of the lower floors (floor 3-6, not disclosing the exact floor just for confidentiality).

The only way I can get through this is by playing raining sounds from my phone to get me to sleep, without white noise the passing vehicle’s sound feels like they are just outside my room (they are some distance away tbh).

How do you all handle these? I wonder if those who stays near mrt station has similar issue? (The other day an alarm in the mrt that is 5 min away from my place rang like crazy during 4am for about half an hour, seriously mentally stressing me out lol).

“Coming here to confess cause my heart really hurts and seems like here is the best avenue.

After I broke off an engagement when I was 28 cause my then bf was sharing different values from me. Now at 32, earlier this year I decided to try for relationship again. I dated this guy and unfortunately we ended as he preferred his gf to be air stewardess model like. All was good but he can’t accept his gf having any meat on her body at all.

So then came now, I recently dated this guy for a while. Things were going fine and we were close to getting into a relationship. So things led to intimacy and he found out that I didn’t told him about my earlier date this year that we slept together.

He was very furious and called me a liar. The next day of our argument, my grandmother had an heart attack and passed on at night that day.

I didn’t tell my current date as he’s very upset with me but I tried to resolve the lying issue with him. But my feelings were out of control and I over spammed him.

He got annoyed and block me from social media and deleted me from contacts as I can’t see his dp from whatsapp and all. He said I didn’t give him time to think and just spamming him.

So I gave him the whole week to think and didn’t went to disturb him while I settled my grandmother wake. After the wake I text him to explain my grandmother passed away but he didn’t reply to me too. Later in the week, I asked him if we could have a talk even if we are ending things.

He said he’s tired of my spamming and want to end things. I tried really hard to get him to forgive me but he said when he found out I lied, he dislike me already and doesn’t want me around at all in his life.

Yes it’s my fault I lied but I’m really sorry for it and it’s in the past. So when I asked him, at least was our feelings real? He said no, just like how you lie about everything. He hated me so much now.

Just wondering, do you guys feel he is just really playing around or at least his feelings was real? I’m so sad the relationship can’t be salvaged anymore thou I really really loved him. I think I should just stay single for life.

I have no more courage for a relationship anymore.”

A Singaporean girl recently posted on Facebook to voice her distrust in guys after stating that she grew up in a very unhappy family.

She said that she can’t trust any guys as her dad had multiple affairs with many women.

Here is the full story:

This is wrong and I can’t stop…I grew up in a very unhappy family. My dad is seldom at home and he had multiple affairs with different women. When I was young, my mom even showed me a love letter written by my dad’s lover. Ever since then I can’t trust any guy.

I feel like they are just going to be like my dad, flirtatious and Undependable. My mom insisted that they loved each other deeply when they were younger which made me feel even more apprehensive about the opposite gender.

I finally met a guy I really really like. But I feel so insecure. I am worried that he is going to be like my dad. Even the smallest interaction with his colleague drives me mad with jealousy. Deep down I know it’s just friendly chat and nothing much. But I ended up giving him cold shoulder for several days. I feel so miserable and guilty for giving him such a hard time. I really want to stop but the fear of abandonment is so deeply rooted within me I can’t control the way I feel.

I know sooner or later my behavior is going to drive him away and I will be even more miserable than before.

Please do not come into the store to fart and then leave

I’ve worked in two retail stores and I don’t know if people just do this more often than I’m aware of it.

Used to work for a big makeup company and had someone come in, pretended to browse, farted, and left. All while me and my coworker were greeting them and suddenly we just caught a big whiff of a fart.

Another time I worked for a local clothing “boutique” where someone just went into the change room, closed the curtain, and walked back out with any interaction at all.

I walked into the changing room and again, biggest and stinkiest fart ever. Ended up spraying febreeze in there since the smell wouldn’t disappear after a while.

Anyways. Toot elsewhere please.

Netizens’ comments

• They might have come in intending to shop, but after dropping a smelly fart got embarrassed and decided to leave.
  Someone just going into a shop to fart would be a really strange thing to do.
• At least they didn’t take a dump in your change room. I wish I was joking, I’m only thankful I wasn’t in that day.
• The first person might not have been pretending. Sometimes folks start their shopping, have a “bathroom surprise” and have to cut things short…

What should I do with my savings? I will have $20k saved up by the end of this month.

I don’t earn much, so I would like to have something that is low-risk. I don’t want to end up losing half or all of my money. I’m also a complete noob when it comes to money and I have no idea what to invest in.

I’m thinking that maybe it’s a good idea to invest it. What should I do with this $20k?

I hear that there are banks that give high returns for deposits of $20k up to 8%, but I don’t know what that bank is. Or should I apply for Singapore Savings Bonds via POSB?

I also have a $30k debt with OCBC for my student loans. Should I pay that off first? The interest rate seems higher than SSB but the idea of giving all my hard-earned money to a bank feels bad.

Netizens’ comments

• Are you paying your student loan by installment? Personally I would try to pay off the loan asap, any balance I would place it in SSB.
• Best to pay off your debt first unless you manage to beat the interest rate of your loan
• Agree with the rest as well that paying off your study loan first jf possible. Saved and scrimped during the first ten months of my first job to pay off the loan when I first graduated. Feel so relieved until the next debt – housing.

Before I begin, open your mind to online relationships, especially since this was an unintentional online relationship.

Me (28F) and my bf (27M, Filipino) have known each other for a very long time. We first met in the fandoms of tumblr way back when I was 18, and we were best online friends among the other online friends I had.

It was my entire world for 5 years as I was young and dumb.

Outside of being online, I studied and worked part-time, had multiple physical NSA relationships irl that never worked out because I was secretly in love with this online friend.

Fast forward to 2022 and we’ve been in a proper online relationship since 2017. I’d always planned to meet him, but he lives in the Philippines and we were both too poor to reach each other.

Then the pandemic happened and has severely delayed my progress in life. I was in a fast-track corporate job but was made redundant at the start of the pandemic, I now work in retail.

As an adult, I’ve made some very good irl friends (i don’t have any online friends anymore). They both live with their boyfriends and one even has a 3-year-old.

I’m feeling like I’m very far behind in life because these two have their boyfriends right there living with them and I’m all alone, living with my parents because I had to move back in with them after losing my job.

Now the pandemic is kind-of over (as in nobody really cares anymore) I’m looking for another corporate job to get my life back on track, but there is still the problem of my boyfriend.

He lives in the Philippines as I mentioned, lives with his parents because Filipinos don’t really move out of their parents house (so he says), and works from home as a freelance artist.

He doesn’t really make much money and has no ambition to make more. He probably would go into a corporate job, but his mental health would suffer I assume.

I have savings to visit him, but he has none to visit me and every time I bring this up he just tells me to pay for him.

I feel like it’s a little unfair that I’m the only one who’s bothered to save my money to visit, even after so long surely he could have saved enough.

I’m fed up. I want a real, physical relationship. I want someone I can come home to and cook dinner for and have kids/adopt pets with and start my life with.

I’ve been faithful and haven’t cheated at all, except with my satisfyer pro. I’ve had multiple people ask me out and I’ve had to refuse because I’ve had a secret online boyfriend this entire time.

I’ve really been thinking about how much I’ve possibly missed out on, on how much time I’m potentially wasting.

But then, if I break things off with him, I am truly alone. I’m constantly asking myself the questions, did I waste the last ten years of my life with this online guy? Or should I go meet him to see the potential we still have even though he doesn’t really want me to?

I’ve gotten to the point where I can’t move forward, and it’s driving me nuts. I know most people are going to say “dump him” but please consider the fact that we’ve been there for each other since day one.

I supported him emotionally through his school and he saw my worst side while I fought an eating disorder.

We’ve been there for each other for so many years but he doesn’t want any more than what we have now. I need more, I want to start living our lives together and start a family, but he doesn’t want any of that.

I have to leave him, don’t I?