Hi everyone! Any advice here? Been together with my gf for more than 3 years and she has already started work for more than a year while I’m in my final year.

However, she kept wanting me to marry her and get a resale flat. The thing is, I haven’t started work and her pay and cpf isn’t enough to pay back the HDB loan if we are to get a resale now.

I always tell her about the financials and how much money is needed to get married, repair and renovate a resale house, and how much it cost to get a resale mature estate. She doesn’t seems to care and don’t think about the money aspect. She feels money will drop from the sky, money is not an issue, and I just want to wait because I don’t want to marry her.

I do but I get stressed out over money issues. Haven’t start work yet, how to afford? I’m from a low income family, how can I even ask my parents to help me with financials when I want them to retire when I graduate this year? Help…

Here are what netizens think:

• agree on a realistic deadline and proceed regardless, there will always be new financial problems to solve everyday

• Buy TOTO

• Find a new one

• You SERIOUSLY need to drop her. In many ways, your wife screwing you over money is much much worst than cheating. At least when she cheats (hopefully) you dont lose your money. Just face.

To all the insurance agent students here, I’m really quite done with seeing more of you time and time again flexing your watches, shoes, bags, shirts, car, etc. If you’re truly great at financial planning as you would suggest, you should know these material goods are better reinvested and wealth is created by living below your means. I know this is a big stereotype, but correct me if I’m wrong if it’s just my circle of friends who are exceptionally narcissistic.

On top on this point, stop saying that you are doing this job out of concern. I know, another big stereotype. But unless you’re willing to take a fixed salary of e.g. 3-4k like 99% of most normal, non-sales job, it is rather hypocritical and again narcissistic of you to even suggest this at all. Otherwise, a suggestion would be to remit your extra bonuses to the clients you’ve served if you are truly eager to help!

Lastly, stop being a motivational guru. I know this is kinda wth, but I also feel that this should not have been required to be brought up in the first place. However, why of all topics does student agents preach about motivation? Who are you? Are you Martin Luther King Jr. or Nelson Mandela? Or have you built Singapore since 1965? Or have you started Facebook from your dorm room despite many naysayers?

Or lets try to bring it down to earth. Are you a student struggling financially in school-fees and the only means to cope by is via an external part-time job? Or may be are you a student-athlete that juggles both school and sports with minimal free-time?

Likely not. You’re a salesman with boatloads of free-time who is psyching yourself up to toughen up your skin to pitch about the SuperSaver 5000 programme to your next client. Say it as it is.

My new house is haunted, but I am the only one that experiences paranormal events.

We moved into our new house about 4 years ago, to be exact. Ever since then I’ve been experiencing weird events, and it only seems to happen to me.

I’ve seen ghosts, have had doors close on me, objects thrown at me, voices impersonating my family members when i’m home alone, objects moving, electronics randomly dying at full, items not being where i left them, furniture being moved across the room and singing echoing throughout my house.

I’ve told my family about these interactions and they don’t seem to have had any of these experiences themselves.

I always blame it on my addiction to horror and paranormal stuff, and blame it on the fact my brain could be imagining it, but objects have moved and physical contact has been made.

Netizens’ comments

• Could it be that because you are open to the paranormal, you can see and sense what is really going on? I think it might be the reason.
• One of the reasons could be that it isn’t your house that’s haunted, but you. You could be the one that’s being haunted by an entity instead of your home.

My Husband does not have a job and spends 46% of my salary.

My husband (29M) and I (24F) have been together now for 6 years, but we got married 2 years ago. He does not have a real job since we started as a couple but he loved playing games and selling some of his items and made a good business out of it.

So for 4 years that has been his job, but since the pandemic started it does not provide a good amount of $ for us to sustain his needs and mine.

Tho I have a job and getting paid quite decently, I understand him. I know that there will be a time that this will happen and he will need me.

But last year Nov 2021 he took a loan for a big motorbike, that will take a year to be paid, he got his money and made a downpayment for for the bike.

And now he got a loan for the remaining balance which needs to be paid in 1 year. about 46% of my salary. I do not make a lot of money but considering the percentage it took out of my pocket, I am getting pissed off.

So for almost a year now I am paying for it, 2 months left and it will be over. But I am afraid this will happen again.

He did not even look for a job to pay for it, he just let me do it. I feel that I am being robbed, and manipulated.

Every day I am stressed and mad at him. I do not want to, but seeing him just playing DOTA every fucking day made me envy him a little. I wish I could just stay here doing nothing and getting things I wanted.

A girl I met two days ago is acting like I’m her boyfriend and is being insanely clingy

I met this girl at school and we exchanged socials. Ever since then she’s been overwhelming as she is apparently head over heels for me and is very persistent.

She’s already invited me to her house twice already, has complained to me that I don’t text her enough with a sad face, has cried to me about her problems and then told me that she was lonely and wanted me to come over.

She complained that I “abandoned” her for five hours yesterday because I had to go to work and didn’t tell her, started telling me that I am a busy guy and never have enough time to text her.

She’s told me that I have to go to all her dance competitions, and asked me mid shift “How is work today❤️.”

Long story short, she is being so overt as she’s only known me for two days and is acting like I’m her boyfriend.

I’m so overwhelmed by her and honestly stressed out. I decided to just leave her on delivered and not respond to her again.

Only thing I’m weary about is if she confronts me at school and asks me about why I ghosted her. Btw, I’m a senior and she’s a junior. Just thought I’d add that.

Netizens’ comments

• You seem like you can string words together. Why not let her know how her behavior is making you feel instead of just ghosting? Sure, she should know better, but maybe she doesn’t.
• Sounds like this girl is super needy and probably has low self-esteem. That’s sad. It might help her if you told her that her behavior is overwhelming. Protect your peace.
• Don’t ghost. It’s so much worse. Be honest with her.

Back story was about 15 years ago. Minimum CPF payout was increased. Only way to get money from CPF is to sell the house. And stay in JB. Selfish dad chose to sell flat and retire himself even when his kids are still studying in Poly and me in uni.

Mum refused to get divorced as she still believed in him.

Mum worked full time to feed herself and the ‘sick’ husband who still can afford to gamble and smoke cigarettes. As for me, I didn’t bother about them when he made decisions only for himself and mum didn’t stop him for our family. That $40k or so was gone in less than 5 years.

10 years on, mum finally got divorced and still chose to remarry to someone else. His children refused to support him and he still believed that we must pay him $1k each for him to earn his ‘salary’. Obviously, us kids refused. He didn’t spend a single cent on us. Mostly, relatives, the govt and mum paid for our life expenses. Didn’t really need much money as we lived on a bare minimum just for food and transport. His money is is his to gamble, and for his overseas trips by himself. If only they had divorced earlier, it would have been easier to get a rental flat or buy a smaller flat in SG.

Grew up being treated badly. Every single mistake was punished by a wide range of equipment, leather belt, hangar, metal mop, plastic pole. Even called up the police few times, but police did nothing. They only care about closing the case and warn us to control our noise level and to be good kids. But at least the beating stopped for the day.

Getting into NTU was like a ticket out of a sickening life. But thinking back, I’m just happy being married and enjoying my own life now.

15 years later, I’m glad to see that NTU hostels are aplenty compared to back then. Supports are much better now. And police take a serious case on child abuse. Nevertheless, dysfunctional parents still exists. And if you’re an undergraduate facing the same problems I had, press on. I didn’t have the tenacity to push through.