I (21F), and bf (21M), have been together for 3 years. I absolutely adore animals, particularly dogs.
He is in the army and always not at home. Previously we chose a breed for if we were to have one together, a samoyed. I also asked if he would be open to the idea of me getting my own dog while we lived separately, and if we moved in together, he didn’t have to take care of it or have any responsibility if he didn’t want to, I asked because he made it clear he wasn’t ready yet, but I was, and we had no plans of living together soon.
He said yes, he would be ok with it. We discussed and mentioned it a few times in total at the start of the year.
End of April I was financially, physically and otherwise able and ready.
I called my bf one night and was trying to check if he was still ok if I got my own dog first. He shut me down instantly, before I could say much and said “no, no, no, OP, no, you’re not getting a dog, no”. When I tried to talk about my reasoning, he continued saying no and wouldn’t let me speak.
Long story short. I went with my dad the next day to a few shelters and found a husky X. He was perfect. And bf likes Huskies, and his type of personality, FYI. I fell in love and got him.
Sadly after a few days, he showed signs of fear and aggressive towards my dad, which I now know is due to his previous owner’s ill-treatment of him. I thought a lot about if I was able and willing to keep him due to this, knowing the amount of work and cost he would need for it.
It’s the weekend and bf has met him. It has been brought back up the circumstances of when I got him. And how he was right because he is aggressive and not the “perfect dog”, and how I got him out of spite, and he was right.
I argued that he unilaterally made a decision, whilst I was trying to discuss it with him as a partner should, and tried to include him and check he was still ok with our previous agreement. He says he has no memory of this agreement. I explained again why a puppy wasn’t a good idea for now, but that the next dog would be. And that I choose one I thought he would like that still suited our needs. And that realistically, I’ll be the one, for the most part, taking care of it, especially given I need the company since bf is always in camp and I hate being alone, and we don’t have any plans on living together soon.
He basically had a go at me accusing me of using him or relying on him financially (I have never asked for money, except I once previously did to help with school fees and even recently told him I didn’t want the other half of it when he offered to pay it and didn’t take it).
