I (21) just realised that my favourite kink is directly related to my trauma

I’ve just realised that my favourite choking kink is directly related to my trauma that I tried to suppress for years. Somehow it all came back to me today and I’m not sure what to think about it.

So I thought I always like to be choked (not till a pass out) but my blood being cut off just up until I feel dizzy and then the partner let go, letting all the blood rush back in. It always gave me such adrenaline and an almost sense of calmness that I can now breathe and see again. It always turned me on. Well I thought it was almost my kink.

This morning I was talking to my best friend about our poor choice of men and she then added “at least no one tried to kill me”. This just kinda brought all the memories from my first relationship back and I realised that I never actually liked being choked until the day when my ex-partner almost killed me.

I was in pretty traumatic relationship but it was always relative mild compared to that night. We were fighting and I was trying to calm him down and then at some point he ended up pinning me against a wall and choking me. The next thing I remember is me on the floor in a lot of pain with tears streaming down my face. I guess I suppressed this memory in the past couple of years.

After breaking up with that partner it is then I developed the kink I guess. I’ve realised that I can only get off if my partner chokes me and until today I just thought it was a kink of mine. But now I’m realising it’s just my brain’s way of dealing with the trauma and regaining control with those men that I trust and that when they let go and the blood rushes back in I realise that I’m safe and it’s consensual.

I wish I didn’t regain the memory of that night so I didn’t have to know that my kink is directly related to the most traumatic night of my life and now I’m not sure if I can see this as a kink and not just my copping mechanism. Are the rest of my kinks also a copping mechanism?

A man who was feeling unhappy due to the constant arguments decided to plant a spy application on her mobile phone.

30-year-old Nicholas Wang Weichou installed the application which allowed him to monitor her location, activate the camera and listen to her surroundings.

Typically mobile spy apps have the capability to also control the phone and read incoming messages, text that has been typed (including passwords) and even downloads any media on the phone.

On one occasion he even sent threatening messages to his wife.

Straits Times reported that Wang was also facing charges for moneylending related charges.

Background:

After the constant struggles in their relationship, Wang purchased a software license known as TTSPY which allowed him to have control, read, write, execute and delete contents of his wife’s phone.

He paid a total amount of $160 for two months worth of subscriptions. While his wife was sleeping he installed the application on her phone.

He even took control of her email and social media accounts.

It is not known how his wife found out but her wife later posted messages on Facebook stating that she has been hacked by her husband.

The victim later made a Police report and Wang tried to dispose of his phone at Boon Lay Market after realising that there is a Police case against him.

Money lending

Back in 2020, Wang took $400 from loan sharks but failed to return the money.

He was then “hired” by the loanshark to perform harassment acts in return, he was told to place locks and debtor notes at homes.

Verdict

Wang was jailed 2 weeks for unlawful stalking and an additional 5 months for loanshark harassment activites.

According to the Police media release, an operation was conducted against crime and secret society suppression operations at public entertainment and nightlife establishments following the relaxation of safe management measures.

The Police reported that 84 public entertainment and nightlife establishments, food and beverage outlets and 234 persons were checked during the island-wide operations.

Photos of operations

Parklane Shopping Mall

The above photo is the operation taking place at Parklane Shopping Mall.

Clark Quay

Aliwal Street

Jurong West Street 52

Arrest

This led to the arrest of 7 men between the ages of 21 and 52, among the 7 five was arrested for suspected members of a secret society.

A 28-year-old was arrested for his connection to a rioting case that happened back in August 2021

A 52-year-old was arrested for possession and consumption of controlled drugs.

Investigations are ongoing for the 7 men.

Penalties

Anyone found guilty of being a member of an unlawful society can face up to three years and/or a fine of SGD$5,000.

The offence of rioting comes with an imprisonment term of up to seven years and shall also be liable to caning.

Anyone convicted of the offence of possession of controlled drugs can face an imprisonment term of up to 10 years, a fine of up to $20,000, or both.

The offence of consumption of controlled drugs is punishable with an imprisonment term of up to three years, a fine of up to $10,000, or both.

A woman was unhappy with her maid and resorted to physical punishments and even going as far as cutting the maid’s salary.

35-year-old Zhao Lin a Singapore permanent resident pleaded guilty in court for hitting her maid on multiple occasions.

Background:

Zhao who is working as a nurse would often hit the maid in front of her 4-year-old son, Today News reported that her son question her mother about the reason for hitting her maid.

Zhao pleaded guilty in court yesterday (Apr 4) after she attacked her 29-year-old Myanmarese maid Ma Ei, the following is a list of things she did to the maid:

• Slapped the maid 10 times on her face for not keeping away her son’s toy in a way that would satisfy her. The slaps were so loud that the home’s CCTV could record the sound of the slap
• Destroying the maid’s mobile phone
• Slapped as the maid did not vacuum “properly”
• Hit her body
• Hurling insults and shouting at the maid
• Cut her monthly salary from $500 to $200 and sometimes to even $100 whenever she make’s mistakes or failed to provide a satisfactory service or damaging any household items and even let the maid sign papers stating that she has received her full $500 salary.

How the case came to light

After getting hit by Zhao, the maid contacted the Police. When the Police wanted CCTV recordings Zhao refused. Zhao’s husband arrives home moments later to provide the data to the CCTV.

The maid was eventually seen by a doctor and several bruises and cuts were found on her body.

Zhao will be back in court on May 9.

If she is found guilty of voluntarily causing hurt she can be jailed up to two years and/or fine SGD$5,000.

For mischief (destroying maid’s phone) she can face up to 1 year in jail.