I feel like this is a common struggle for most of us in a relationship. While it’s not the end of the world, it would be nice to not be the only one cleaning, doing laundry, taking the trash out, tidying, etc.
He has the audacity to get mad at me for using a towel right after I shower (just barely even dressed yet) and putting it on my chair because it needs washed. He said he couldn’t dry his hands. Meanwhile, there are fresh and clean towels under the sink. Who put them there? Me.
Our agreement since we moved in together years ago was since I hate cooking, he cooks, he hates cleaning, I clean. Well, that’s not working out because he doesn’t cook enough, maybe once a week or two.
Of course, I’ve brought this up when we communicate, but being told “if you want something done, ask me and I’ll do it” isn’t enough. I’m not someone’s mother, no one likes to nag, and no one likes to be nagged. It’s not fun for either party. Just do the thing. If you’re an adult, you should know if something is messy and if you have a minute, tidy up, right? You shouldn’t need a manager.
We were out of laundry detergent so I asked if he can order more. There are two laundry baskets in our room full of his clothes that haven’t been put away in 2 weeks. I hate putting away clothes too but we only have so much space in this room.
He collects two laundry baskets from the room and brings them to me. … I’m studying right now. There are clothes sitting in our dryer. How does it not cross your mind to put our clothes in a basket before you bring them to me so I do it? It’s okay, you go play the drums and I’ll stop studying to put clothes in a basket.
I’m a musician too so that’s not a problem, but holy can you please prioritize and be somewhat considerate.
Here are what netizens think:
- I’m a big believer in my partner not asking to help in his own home. This is a shared space, and the cleaning is a shared task. One thing I learned is to stop being angry in silence and hope they notice and make a change. Be loud about it. Stop cleaning, let the chaos build up. You’re not a house wife, you’re his partner. Until he starts treating you like one, don’t give in.
- I stopped cleaning and now I live in a dust filled, dirty flat
- This feels like reading my own thoughts out loud. Like, I love the man but damn, I need a break from being the only one to do any chores.