A girl shared how she doesn’t shower very often because she hates looking at her own body.
Here is the story:
I don’t shower nearly as often as I should because seeing my body brings me to tears.
Something went horribly, horribly wrong during puberty that left me with an EXTREMELY wide ribcage relative to my height.
Other people insist they don’t notice but it’s one of those things where they’re saying that because they know I can’t change it so they don’t want to make me feel worse.
It’s left me with this weird, awkwardly shaped body. This doesn’t even go into my oversized skull with facial features that seem like they’d be better suited to a gorilla. Just looking at my reflection is akin to a normal person making the ugliest face they possibly could; for me, that’s just my face.
Even in the safety of my own home, I feel self conscious with my shirt off. I only change clothes once every few days because I hate acknowledging my body.
I have no idea how even the remote possibility of a genetic abomination such as myself escaped the primordial soup billions of years ago, let alone how it survived until now and actually ended up happening.
I can tell when people are around me that they look upon me with a mix of pity and disgust. I hate showering for this reason, and only do so a couple times a week; sometimes I go weeks without doing so.
Just having to acknowledge the grotesqueness of my body is enough to make me hyperventilate.
While puberty made the problem so, so much worse, it was obvious from birth more or less that I was a freakishly hideous human being, and I’ve always hated acknowledging my appearance.
My parents would have done me a favor had they aborted me, as my grotesque shape almost certainly would have come through on ultrasound, rather than confine me to this prison of a body, this cage of bone and flesh.
Editor’s note: You need to learn to love yourself.