so I’ve been having some digestive issues that I’ve been keeping on the down-low from my better half because I’ve been pretty hopeful that the laxatives would work gradually and soon I’ll be pooping again.
I cooked dinner and it was a super-rich garlic Chili pasta, and salad and then a few hours later we get a bit frisky. My boyfriend goes down on me and is going to town. Over the last hour, my stomach had definitely been moving but I hadn’t felt the urge to go to the toilet. Anyway…as he’s going to town I realise I now need to go to the toilet and can feel the urge becoming unbearable. I try to get up to run to the loo and he stops me thinking it’s part of us playing together, pushes me back down on the bed and puts his face between my legs as I unleash the loudest longest hottest fart ever. and the smell is like death.
I blurt out: “I need the toilet.”
And RUN to the bathroom and proceed to get rid of 6 days of constipation in 1 session. Because I had so much to get rid of, it gave me a good excuse to not have to look my boyfriend in the eye for a good while. I couldn’t be accused of hiding in the bathroom. But as I was running away he replied: “I know.”
As he coughed and gaged on the smell.
Here are what netizens think:
- True love would be getting old, going broke and homeless, losing your teeth and hair and ability to screw and continence and ability to walk, and still being happy together
- At least u never lao sai in his face, I can only imagine while his eating u and the a gush of choco milkshake flies into his mouth
- I had an ex who would fart in her sleep. Her farts were like thunder claps that woke me up on occasion. I was surprised she didn’t set the sprinklers off. She had no idea she did this and would proudly exclaim that I’d never heard her fart. Little did she know.