29 C
Monday, July 22, 2024


Girlfriend [35F] broke up with me [37M] last night, then changed her mind in the morning. I have no idea how to feel about this.


We were together 3 years until last night. I hate my current job, and my contract finishes in January. I applied for jobs everywhere for when my contract is over, and my choices ended up being to stay at the job I hate for a 10 month extra, or a job in overseas for 4 years. I have been stressing about which to choose for about 3 months.

Well, last night the stress of the decision came to an end. She ended it for honestly good reasons.

She is religious and I am not religious. This has been bothering her a while

She is very family orientated and I am not.


She wants to get married and live together soon, but I don’t want do soon as I haven’t lived with her. I won’t marry someone I’ve never lived with, she has a 19-year-old daughter who I don’t like that lives at home

She is pro-life and I am pro-choice. Her pro-life isn’t judgemental towards anyone else. She believes all women should make their own choices about their own bodies, so really she is pro-life for herself, and pro-choice for everyone else. I don’t want children (childfree) so she is worried about what would happen to us if an accident happens.

Now, honestly I understand these things. They make sense. These things have been growing in her mind for the last year and it just exploded last night. Obviously I was upset, but logically even though I love her, it makes sense. I am glad she told me because if I would stay for her and be broken up with next year, I’d be really unimpressed at her for making me lose my overseas job.

Now, this morning she changed her mind and went back on everything. She said she loves me and we can make it work, that we can work out everything. My problem here though, I don’t know if I want to now. She has given me a list of reasons we should not be together, a list of reasons at why I am not good for her, and I can’t stop thinking about that. If she said nothing, then everything would be ok, but because she did say these things, I can’t help but think that we are not suited.

I thought that, if I had no choice but to stay then maybe we could try. The problem is, I have a great job offer, and I am worried that these feelings could grow again if I stay here. I will be very resentful (?) if I stay here and we break in a year because of these reasons above. I am also worried about her as she has no friends, she has been very unlucky meeting people. I am wondering if that’s part of the reason she changed her mind, maybe she is worried about being alone so is settling (?) for me.


Does anyone have any advice for this? Part of me is wondering why she’d go back on all those points. Would these things boil up (?) again? Surely someone out here has experienced something like this. Is it worth staying with her to try again, or should I take this list as a reason to leave and just go? I really do love her, but I have this feeling that staying wouldn’t be a good idea (confused maybe?).

- Advertisement -
- Advertisement -
Latest News


My father and I have never been close. He left my mother and I when I was only three...
- Advertisement -