I had been feeling the tension around the house for weeks. My mum had been uncharacteristically quiet and withdrawn; she used to chat away with me, my two sisters and brother, but now she was spending most of her time in her room. I was certain something was wrong.
Today, we had all been summoned to the dining room. We took our seats, my brother and I on one side of the table, my two sisters on the other. Mum had made us some snacks and tea, which we ate silently, all of us aware that something was coming.
Told us about her will
Mum took a deep breath and spoke.
“I’ve been thinking a lot lately,” she said. “I’ve been trying to decide what to do with all my possessions. I want to make sure they go to the people I love most, and that means my children.”
My heart sank as she said this. I knew what she was going to say.
“So,” she continued, “I’ve decided to leave all my possessions to my son, your brother. I know he will take care of them and make sure they are looked after.”
My sisters and I exchanged glances. We hadn’t expected this. We had all assumed that we would all get a share of our mum’s possessions. But it seemed that wasn’t to be.
My mum continued. “I know this isn’t what you wanted, but it’s what I think is best. I know your brother will make sure everything is taken care of. I’m sorry if this isn’t what you expected.”
We all sat in silence. My sisters and I were in shock. We had expected to get something, but now it seemed that wouldn’t be the case. We all knew our brother would take good care of everything, but it felt like a slap in the face to us.
My mum looked around the table, her eyes sad. “I’m sorry,” she said. “I know this isn’t what you wanted. But it’s what I feel is best.”
We all said nothing. There was nothing to say.
My mum stood up and looked around the table. “I love you all,” she said. “And I know you’ll understand why I had to do this.”
With that, she left the room.
Typical ‘zhong nan qing nu’ mindset
My sisters and I sat in stunned silence. We had expected to get something of our mum’s, but now it seemed that wouldn’t be the case.
We thought that in this time and age, there would not be anymore traditional thinking of ‘zhong nan qing nu’ anymore.
For non mandarin readers sake, zhong nan qing nu means favouring boys over girls and it is a very typical mindset and culture of the more traditional Chinese households.