I am 40 and I have a good career. I am not wealthy but can afford decent life.

I had no luck with girls or dating at all in my life. I have come to the point of accepting the proposal from someone I know. Now I want to crowdsource opinion to make my decision.

Recently, I got to know a pretty looking guy. After being a friend who went hunting to get to know girls with me for close to two months we became good friends.

We were not successful in finding any woman who want us. So we will hang around for meals at night.

Then one night he suggested that I can pay for his surgery in Thailand for him be become a female. He said that the advantage is that I can decide how I want him to look like.

He suggested that this way I can have a very pretty wife that anyone will feel jealous of. He said that he will love me and be the woman of my dreams.

He also said that this means that I dont have to wait any longer.

I dont know if I should accept his proposal. I just want a woman who will be mine. I dont mind if she was a “he” before. What will you do if you are me?

Sorry if this is a weird post. I don’t have any women in my life to discuss this with who wouldn’t judge me.

It’s like I turned 20 years old and a switch flipped in my brain. My whole life, I have hated babies. I refused to even hold them if they were offered to me. I disliked children even more. I have never had any sort of thought in my mind about having a child, and I knew if I did, I would be adopted as the concept of pregnancy horrified me.

Then my birthday rolled around. Ever since then, I have had this strong, overwhelming, and visceral desire to get pregnant. I logically know I cannot ever handle having a kid, and realistically, I don’t want one. But now I have to CONVINCE MYSELF of that fact.

I have to argue with myself about it. I love babies all of the sudden. I love looking at them, I love holding them, I love walking around the baby aisle. I have this DEEP NEED to get pregnant. And I have no idea why. I do NOT want to get pregnant. But I have a need and it’s freaking me out! I am still horrified by the concept of pregnancy but my head tries to convince me otherwise. I literally do not want a kid. But my body does.

Why is this happening to me? I want this feeling to go away. Some days it’s all I can think about.

Is it weird?

Pls Help!

A man has been living in the parking lot behind my apartment in his car for several months on and off. I live on the first floor. When I was doing the dishes the other night (fully clothed) I turned around and he had his phone flashlight pointed at his ding dong, and he was masturbating, watching me.

After I did a double-take because I could not believe what I saw, he persisted. I yelled for my boyfriend to come over and only then did the man leave and get back into his car and drive off, only to return the next morning. I was in shock and did not really know what to do (I should’ve called 999 right away), but I tried contacting the non-emergency line and could not get through to them that night.

The next day after consulting with family and friends and realizing it was an emergency, and because he had not left, I called 999. An officer came to my apartment and filed a report. the man was parked in his car in the parking lot the whole time the officer was there, but the cop said he couldn’t legally ask the man to leave because he was parked there and didn’t do anything.

The cop said all he could do was file the report and a detective would be in touch in “a few weeks”…he also advised me to get the owner of the parking lot involved, because only he has the legal right to have the man’s car towed.

I tried calling the tow number on the sign in the parking lot but the number is not even in service.

What can I do at this point…? It has been over a week now and he has still not left the parking lot, (in the past he has come and gone). I feel extremely unsafe and I feel like no one is wanting to get involved for whatever reason. It seems pretty straightforward to me.

I don’t even care about charging him I just want him to go away. It’s really throwing me off. If anyone can guide me and help me get to the next step that would be immensely appreciated.

Were you like me? Interested in psychology and stumbled across “love languages” and realised how it is on a global rise and all men have one love language “physical touch”, well, so was the authors intentions, he believed that S was the glue for marriages and a quick b-job could help tonnes

Thankfully we are here, if you have not yet realised it, please do, you deserve to be loved in every language

Any man worthy of your time will spend quality time with you, will tell you good things, will buy you gifts when they can, will help you out when they can, will offer you needed intimacy or otherwise

Now you might be more responsive to either of these based on your personality and mood

Words of affirmation do wonders for me but I hate acts of service, if I were to tell this via test and have it handed over to a guy, should he stop offering any help at all? No, he should offer help and respect when I want to do something by myself and be capable to handling a task I need help with, for example I can’t kick start a vehicle

So don’t let anyone delude you into the love language crap, they exist, but all together.

Mandatory not all men, but tell me if men haven’t weaponised physical touch for S bs

My partner (24) and I (24) have lived together for the past two years. We are in a small two bedroom apartment with our dog and a friend who lives with us. We are both employed, and I am also a graduate student currently in Uni.

During the week before and during my partner’s period, they get very moody. I am basing this off of my experience with prior partners and asking most of my best friends (who are women). To give you an idea, it’s to the point where I will forget to to hang up the dog’s leash, she will get mad at me, go silent, and then lock herself in a room for hours. Then she will go to work silently, and come home like nothing has happened.

I initially thought this might have been due to increase stressors (we are living pay check to pay check), or the idea that I possibly don’t spend enough time with them. But, it feels like every time we do hang out one on one, I make one wrong joke (never about hormones or emotions or stuff, just stupid online jokes) and then I’m stuck sleeping on the couch.

Some more background before I go further, we both have our own mental struggles. I have had depression and anxiety for over 6 years and have been actively seeing a therapist and psychiatrist for about five years, and have in the last 4 months been what I would consider “consistently normal / happy”. My partner has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder many years ago though she hasn’t seen anyone or gotten medication ever as it is “too expensive” which is fair. I have offered up many therapists and opportunities to get help with low income that I have emailed around about and asked my therapist (who I see through the school for free after paying my student fees).

It feels like I always try to go above and beyond during the time around their period and even not around her period. I consistently cook and clean, and try to spend as much time with them as possible. But it’s just been getting to the point where I know if we hang out I will just get emotionally used, even though I know that is not her goal. I am fully aware she is not directly in control of how their menstrual cycle affects them and I try to keep this in my head constantly. It’s just hard when none of my past roommates, friends, or even our current other roommate does not act anywhere nearly as, and I didn’t want to use this word, emotionally tiring.

It’s just so hard for me to balance graduate school, a job, my own family, cooking, staying physically and mentally healthy and try to have friends when two weeks out of the month I can’t do anything right.

We have talked about it before and she generally apologizes after her period is over (the week after she is very happy go lucky), but damn. It is rough.

Am I thinking unreasonably?

I’ve been in Company A for 6.5yrs. I was first hired as an accounts assistant. But subsequently the boss promoted me to do Sales and Marketing along with HR and Accounting work.

Along the way, I realised I don’t like the Sales and Marketing job scope. I no longer do accounts despite me approaching my boss numerous times that I prefer accounting job.

I have 2 young kids and my boss has been very kind and understanding towards me taking urgent leaves etc. My salary started off with $1.8k to now at $3.5k which I’m truly grateful. (I only have an A Level and Private Diploma in Accounting & Finance)

The first time I resigned was when I was 2years into the job. But he retained me and i stayed on on the condition that i will no longer handle sales and marketing.

Fast forward to last year, after coming back from maternity leave, I realised he changed my job scope without discussing with me first. He has yet again thrown sales and marketing to me again. I’ve tried dealing with it for a year but because I do not enjoy what I was doing, I didn’t do a great job in following up. Hence this sometimes led to him scolding me. Which I feel that it is unfair as I’ve told him many times I don’t like this job and he kinda ask me just to help him as he needs someone trustworthy.

I started sending resume last month. Out of the 30 resumes I’ve sent out, only 2 called back and 1 wanted to hire me. I understand that my currently salary is inflated than compared to what experience I have. Of course I’m looking at the direction of getting more experience in accounting and finance rather than just like being a PA to him.

Prospective Company B initially offered me 3.2k and I wanted to accept it. But after tendering, my boss talked to me and finally agreed to take away the sales and marketing portion. After much consideration, I turned down Company B as it was a huge paycut of 3.6k/annual and also because Company A promised to take away the part that I did not enjoy. 2 days later Company B called me to offer again. They are willing to match my current salary and I am given a chance to learn financial reporting which I didn’t have a chance in Company A.

I’m truly at a loss. Should I stay on at Company A or move on to Company B? The thing is, I’m very comfortable at where I am at now. But if I decided to stay on, then I will need to stay and work there till I die kind cos another 5yrs i will be 40yo. 3.5k for an accounts staff without full set of exposure is very hard to get a job paying 3.5k. Most jobs that were offering 3.5k needs to have exposure of full set accounts. In a way I’m worried for my future. I’m good for Company A but it isn’t good for my experience. Hopefully this post gets approved as I need to give Company B an answer by Friday.

My husband and I have been through a hard year and a half. My FIL died in an accident in 2020. We moved 2 doors down from my MIL to help out since my husband’s brothers have houses and families when we didn’t. Unfortunately my BIL’s didn’t take us moving closer very well nor did they like my husband (the youngest of all the siblings) taking charge when my FIL was in the hospital and for the funeral when my MIL couldn’t do it. But my husband wasn’t working at that point and had the time.

The house we moved into was a family member and the one brother thought he was going to inherit it, but the family wanted money and we came up with the most cash to buy it. My BIL verbally assaulted my husband and then they stole one of my husband’s and his dad’s race car, which was parked at my in-laws at the time, we ended up calling the police to get back and since then we haven’t talked to the brothers or their families.

Fast forward, my MIL remarried a few months ago, but we had Covid and couldn’t make it to the wedding. The new husband was hoping the wedding would bring my husband and the brothers back together but us getting Covid back fired on that plan.

Recently, we found out we’re pregnant with our first and it’s been a very tough pregnancy my doctor has put me on bed rest.

My MIL and new husband came to us recently and told us that they paid and reserved hotel rooms for the whole family in July. We politely declined because

1) my doctor said no

2)his brothers will be there and we don’t need the stress.

The new husband said that we’re selfish and we’re not taking my MIL’s feelings into consideration. My husband decided he no longer wants to be around his brothers and does not want our child around them and I will support whatever decision he makes.

But are we in the wrong for not going?

They didn’t ask us before they paid and reserved the rooms and knew I’m pregnant and have been in and out of the hospital.

My parents and a few close friends were in the room when the vacation discussion happened and they agreed with us, but some others are saying to suck it up and go on this vacation.

I did ask my doctor who also said no just because I need weekly appointments and blood draws and they don’t want me to go too far in case something happens. But people are saying we need to stop thinking of ourselves, but we feel we’re not thinking of ourselves. We’re thinking about our unborn child.