Help my buddy doesn’t bathe. For the past few weeks, I’ve noticed that he never goes to the toilet to shower. Despite guard duty on weekdays, he doesn’t shower.

Despite repeated warnings by his bunkmates he refuses to bathe. He really smells and tries to mask It with deodorant.

Furthermore, he does not eat any of his meals. He collects the full meal with the extra bun and discards the full meal away after.

When he was confronted by the sgts, he tried to fake bathe by bringing his towel and soap to the toilet stood inside the cubicle for a while and walked out. He then informed me he has bathed

What can I do to convince him to bathe.

Netizens’ comments

• maybe all of you can hold your nose when near him

• ok regardless of all the judgement, objectively, if he uses deo it means that he knows he smells bad enough to require it.
  so proper way to solve this would be to find the reason why. if u really want to help, u cant start with the endgoal of him in the cubicle everyday showering since it will just push him further away (think smoking and quit smoking signs).
  is it an in camp thing or in general thing? is it adjustment disorder since u mention not eating as well?

I lost a close friend of 10 years, whom we first met in secondary school after coming out to him that I am gay just last week.

He suddenly just distanced himself away from me and just blocked me on Insta and telegram yesterday (he used to put all my messages on read).

When I called him today, he said that this friendship is over and hung up. It was quite shocking as I remembered that when I first came out last week, he said he won’t treat me differently and he’ll still be my friend.

But after finding out that he cut all contact lines with me, I am heartbroken and lost. Not only I was slapped with a lie, but also witnessed a behavioural change in him, that he prefer to have straight friends.

Was it a bad move to disclose my orientation to someone I know for so long? Is he afraid that I’m trying to flirt with him? I knew he has a girlfriend and I respected that. I wasn’t intending to date him, I just wanted to be accepted for who I am. He seems to be living in this bubble on what gays are ‘supposed to be’.

Now I have this fear of telling my other friends that I’m gay as they might have the same reaction. Should I just forget that ‘friend’ and move on, or give him more time to move on.

I know now many young ppl are open towards the lgbtq community, but I still can’t handle what I just encountered. I lost a part of myself there.

Here are what netizens think:

• A friend who can’t accept who, what and how you are, is not worth your time anymore. Time-length of a friendship doesn’t define anything. That’s why there’s a saying of 患難見真情. Put this down and move on. Don’t be surprised if ever a day you heard that he has been letting people know what you told him. Such is human. Life sucks sometimes. Take care!

• If they don’t accept you, they don’t deserve to be your friends. Join an interest club, put yourself out there meet people. You’ll realized the world is big enough to know that there are people you really get along with and accept you for who you are. They won’t ask you to change and will be supportive of you.

• He isn’t worth your time and effort. Now you can focus on others who actually care about you as a friend.

• I am sorry you are going through this. He must have meant a lot to you as a long time friend and you must be feeling really hurt right now. Bear in mind that he might be uncomfortable with his own orientation. It’s call projecting in psychology…nothing to do with you. In this day and age, there will be a lot of other people who are accepting of you. Chin up, you’ll have better experiences

My husband had a history of cheating on me and he’s doing it again

Recently while he’s working overseas once again I caught him lying about his whereabouts and timing after his company dinner. Simply just disappeared for two hours, couldn’t find him, he’s not picking up calls.

He only answered the video call when he was back in the hotel room. He said he was charging his phone inside his bag that’s why cannot hear when I called him. All these are bs. How can he miss out my calls when I tried to reach him for 1hr?

So now. He has been twisting around his stories when I told him I have already called and checked with the restaurant. He still not admitting to anything, still going on like nothing happened.

Why? What have I done wrong? I have never failed as a wife. Been through difficult times with him, never left him no matter what he did outside. End of the day, 13 years of marriage is just nothing to him. I am just nothing to him. I am not working because my three children are still very young. Only the eldest sitting for PSLE this year. I have enough of this man and his nonsense yet I am so lost and with no income and help. I couldn’t sleep for the past few days, couldn’t do stuffs with my children.

What should I do?

Here are what netizens think:

• divorce loh, talk so much also no use

• you say only no evidence, I got accused of not picking up phone cause I pang sai before.

• Sometimes this is call, no problem find problem, sorry to say you got some insecurity issues.

What i wore in front of my boyfriend’s friend?

Two days ago my (21F) boyfriend (23M) had his friends over, I knew they were coming since he’d told me the night before.

It was really warm (surprisingly) and all I was wearing was a sports bra (sort of low cut?) and kinda tight shorts.

I sat on the sofa next to my boyfriend for a little while, whilst they played some games on the tv and then I went to get some lunch.

By the time I was finished eating they had left and my boyfriend completely blew up at me. He said I was dressed like that for attention, i made all his friends stare at me, I knew what i was doing and that I should have covered up as soon as I saw them.

He stormed out and since he came home he’s barely spoken to me.

should I have worn something less revealing?

Netizens’ comments

1. Wear what you like, its sportwear not suggestive lace underwear so the wore it for attention angle is off. Dont see his issue tbh If his mates were leering over you thats on them not you
2. I think people are definitely getting empowerment and appropriateness mixed up. She can wear what she wants, that’s true. However, covering up when guests are over is the appropriate thing to do. Like someone said just a t-shirt or something when you walked out of your room or something. Your boyfriend should not have yelled, I agree. But like I said just a shirt or something would have sufficed just when you left the room.
3. As a male, I’ve been over to friends’ houses countless times when their significant others wore something similar. It’s totally normal. Your boyfriend is overreacting.
   You are both still fairly young, so it might be worth just having an adult conversation about it. If he’s uncomfortable with you wearing that, it’s his problem. If his friends make suggestive comments about you to him, they’re not good friends.

I want to downgrade to HDB but my parents are reluctant, what can I do?

My parents are not SG citizens but ( edit: foreigners, PRs later on ) so they bought a condo when they first moved here. I’m SG citizen ( born here ) but not 35 or married so cannot buy HDB of my own yet. After graduating from uni and working for a few years, my parents have retired and I’ve been giving them allowance ever since. They are not always in SG, maybe 6-7 months out of 12 months in SG every year.

Now, I recently found out that I can actually buy a resale HDB because I’m Singaporean and my parents are PR. ( I hope I’m correct here, otherwise this whole post is useless lol )

I want to downgrade from this shit condo because the maintenance fees is stupid ( $350+ a month ), it’s small as shit, noisy neighbors and we can easily downgrade to a 600-700k+ resale HDB that will be 40% more spacious and be near amenities, etc.

For what it’s worth, this condo is out of nowhere, the nearest bus-stop is like a good 10 mins walk away… The nearest supermarket is 20 mins away. When I tell my parents this, they tell me “oh just order grabfood loh”. Walan… $20 for a cold meal, I don’t get it really. I know I can cook at home but sometimes I wanna go hawker eat too and the nearest one is 20-25mins away…

Please help bros and sis, how ah? how to persuade my parents? Can legit sell this condo for at least 1m and buy a nice 600-700k renovated HDB. I just feel like my parents trying too hard to act like “rich foreigners” when the reality is that we’re poor…

Back in uni I rented a HDB room for like $600 dollars and I fking loved it, 2 mins walk to bus-stop, 3 mins walk to chicken rice store, $4 extra chicken etc, sibei shiok. Nice neighbors, etc. Really felt right at home like a true Singaporean.

I (F30) met my BF’s (M27) other girlfriend at the hospital. Had no idea she existed before today.

My boyfriend was involved in an accident last night. Only got to know about it a few hours later and he was sketchy about the hospital he was in. Fortunately I quickly figured out where he was.

Went to see him at the hospital, he was inside with his brothers and friends. There was a girl sitting outside her room who kept measuring me up.

BF was about to be transferred to another hospital for surgery and as we were walking out, the girl made a point to introduce herself. Out of shock, I just said i’m his friend but I could see she suspected.

She got into the car with the brothers and they followed the ambulance. I just drove home. Didn’t talk to the BF as he was unconscious when they wheeled him out.

Thinking of just blocking him on everything, but I also feel bad should I not check up on him after surgery. I’m just heartbroken and confused.

What would you guys do?

Update: So I texted the guy, he hasn’t read it yet. The text summarised said “I met X, I won’t be coming to the hospital as you obviously won’t need me. Your gf will be there for you.” and a bit more about the lies.

Then I blocked him. I don’t know if there will be any update after this as I don’t see where the story can possibly go.

A quick search on the internet about his injuries showed he will be recovering for the next 4 to 6 months as he has a broken femur. We work on the same premises, but different companies, so maybe there will be one when he gets back to work

Netizens’ comments

1. Sounds like you are the side chick. Move on. Especially since the other girl got in the car with the brothers. It’s a terrible way to find out.
2. I mean, if he had another girlfriend, I think that overrides the need for you to check on him. He’s looked after better than he deserves.

Ghosting him would be best. You know all you need to know for that. I’m sorry you’re going through this.

Am I the only one who feels humiliated and disappointed having to depend on my parents or someone else monetarily?

I am 26 years old and i’m almost 6 years unemployed, currently i live with my mother, I think I can say that I have a good life compared to the ones who don’t own a home but I don’t know how long will she keep me under her wings, because it seems that my monetary debt to her only increases every time I consume something here.

I’ve spent some time searching for a job and doing job interviews, the results was; no success, so i decided it’s better wait for some shinning light knock on my door needing an employee even considering that possibility lazyness of my part because i don’t know if these people have something personal against me?

By the way… is very obvious what will happen with me if I don’t achieve independence, to not say tragic.

Netizens’ comments

1. Wait so because you didn’t get a job right away you just quit looking and decided that you were going to wait for someone to show up and say “Please unknown seeker we want to hire you!” Like how would they find you? How do they know you’re looking?
2. So…What have you been doing for the past 6 years? Are you taking classes? Getting certifications? Do you have any skills? Have you even bothered applying to fast food or retail? Even if you’re playing video games all day, are you even trying to monetize that through Twitch or YouTube? What have you been doing all this time other than mooching off your mom? You can’t just wait and pray and manifest a job. You need to be applying to any and everything you think you can learn to do.
3. As hard as it has been to get a job, being unemployed for six years is absolutely a choice. Choose differently. You can still job hunt while working.