During my time in NS, throughout the whole two years, I painstakingly scrimped and saved and managed to save about $10k to $12k by the time I ORDed, and wanted to grow that money through investments.

So back then, I knew absolutely nothing about investments at all, at the time, and the only thing I knew was *name redacted*, a famous investment expert in Singapore because he kept popping up in ads everywhere, I’m sure you have heard of him.

So I paid about $1.7k to attend one of his investment courses, where there was a free 3.5 hour seminar about the basics of forex trading and investments in general.

He then later invited us to the “advanced classes” of his investment course that ran for about 4 days, and he said there was a “one time promotional fee” of $1.7k, and that the usual fee was $2k.

And to be honest, personally, I feel like I learned nothing throughout the whole 4 days of the investment course. Half the time he appeared to be talking to himself. Anyway, I later went online and found the same things that he was teaching, was availalable for free on YouTube.

Everything that he taught in the investment course could be found on YouTube, and I could’ve saved that $1.7k…

Anyway long story short, I lose the whole of my NS savings through Forex trading, and I do have some other money in Crypto, but they are in the red now, so my losses could be even worse.

Netizens’ comments

1. If the expert is so good, why is he open lesson to teach u to get rich. He will be sitting on beach invest for himself…. 
2. If he found a good way to make easy money you think he will share? Which human is not selfish?
3. You sound like someone who would spend money on magic beans, Jack.
4. All basic information. I attend before. Cannot use one

So I was covering a couple of night shifts for a coworker who was having a surgery at the time. The first nights were fine, minus the 4am drowsiness. Well the third night took a weird turn. Around 2am nature called and against my best wishes had to poop.

So then I went across the hall to the 2 toilets we have by our lobby (which is also right in front of a motion capture camera, important later).

I was doing my business at the time and scrolling on my phone, I had a very loud and fast knocking on the cubicle door. It would have scared the crap out of me if I wasn’t already taking care of that situation.

“Occupied.” I stated in a confused tone.

The fast hard knocking happened again, with a slight jiggle of the handle.

“Only room for one I’m sorry” I said with a slight sternness and raised my voice because I was slowly but surely getting irritated with the knockings.

At this point I was agitated more than anything, because for the last 2 hours I have had no human interaction. Then as soon as I’m on the toilet I get company? Come on man, choose a better timing.

I leave the cubicle and no one is there. I check the other cubicles which is right next to the one I was in. The door was propped slightly so I could see it was not being used. I was beyond confused.

To stifle my own curiosity I pulled up the camera to see who was pounding on door, and why they couldn’t use the other one.

I saw 2 recent events… 1 event was me entering the toilet… the 2nd event was me leaving the toilet. Nothing else activated the motion ACTIVATED camera. It was at this point I was severely spooked.

My love language is acts of service. I’m the type of person to buy my boyfriend something when I think of him and get excited whenever I give it to him.

I always offer him food when he’s over at my house, always made sure he was comfortable (food, drinks, whatever he needs etc.) I always offer him food whenever im eating or have food no matter how big or small.

I do it because one, Its common courtesy and good manners and two, because I’m happy when he’s taken care of. I invited him to family dinners at restaurants and he didn’t have to pay for anything.

I go as far as offering and feeding him in the car while he’s driving and has his hands full because I feel bad that I’m eating next to him and he’s not able to because his hands are on the wheel.

Recently when I saw him i bought him waffles and starbucks without him even having to ask.

The problem is, he’s the exact opposite. And despite me voicing out my concerns and having arguments about it, things didn’t really change much.

He would eat beside me or in front of me and not offer me anything. We would go inside a store and he would only get something for himself and pay for them but rarely offers to get me anything or pay for mine even though its something as small as a chocolate bar.

I always pay or offer to pay for my own things which I don’t mind because I’m independent and I don’t mind doing it for myself.

It happens very often though and i lately find myself feeling like I’m single in terms of not having someone who looks out for me.

When we first started dating, I’d go hours at his house without being offered anything. After I voiced these things in an argument, he has paid or given me food sometimes but its very inconsistent and hasn’t done that lately.

He would ask me one day if i wanted something and the next day he’d eat and not offer (that type of inconsistency).

We’d be driving in the car and I would tell him I’m starving, he’d brush it off and forget about it and continue driving (i hate having to ask. i used to have poor boundaries)

Another time, we went for a drive and I literally told him I was starving and was feeling pain in my stomach and needed to stop for food asap and he said sure but continued driving more.

Had I not make a big deal out of it, he wouldn’t have gotten out and stopped by a restaurant. I was so dehydrated my pee was dark orange and smelled strongly of ammonia (it was that bad).

We had an argument about it and he was still coming up with lame excuses but promises to change.

Fast forward to months later, today, in the car, he started eating his food beside me and didn’t offer me anything yet again so when i got mad he said he didn’t know what was wrong and that he got me something but was waiting for me to finish what i was doing

(sure you got me food, but i didn’t even know about it because you didn’t tell me. How are you gonna start eating on your own and not think to include me? Not even a “hey i got us food lets eat together”!!)

He said he was waiting for me to finish what i was doing and that he wasn’t really eating, he was just checking to see if it was still too hot to eat (uh, what?)

His excuses: “I didnt know”, “you didn’t speak up”, “i wasnt sure where you wanted to eat,” “you always say no when i offer” (yet he offers food he knows i dont eat). All BS obviously. Honestly I could go on and on.

I grew up in a generous and caring household so this isnt something im used to nor I can ever get used to. Don’t even get me started on how i found out he had contact with his ex via phone and gave her money.

So I left him. Taking myself to a nice treat because how tf did I tolerate that. Why the hell did i give so much care and received so less?

Feeling jealous over SO’s career

SO of 2 years recently started a new role with a pay of around 7k. Although I was really happy for him, and for us, can’t help but feel this tinge of jealousy when he innocently shares about how great the role /company / pay is.

Hearing about his job triggers this sense of discontent about my current situation and makes me feel like I’m underpaid, although I know perfectly well we’re in different industries and his tends to pay higher (around ~60% more).

Any advice on how to not feel jealous about SO’s higher pay / “better” career? I want to be genuinely happy for him. I know I should be seeing us as a team instead of him being a competitor. please help!

Netizens’ comments

1. Sharing this as someone coming from the opposite POV (your SO’s).
   Recently landed a new job that bumped me from a difference of $1K from my partner to ~$5K. When my SO heard the news, her first reaction was joy for me that turned to exactly what you felt – jealously, discontent and sadness, despite us being in totally different industries.
   We had a long chat about what this meant for us moving forward, and dug deeper into our feelings about it. What came out from it were exactly what the others mentioned – we’re in this as a team, together. Its not about me VS you, but more about US VS others. Along the way, also figuring out why does this bother her – for us, it was ego and insecurity – and so, this unfortunately meant swallowing our ego at times and working on ways we can contribute otherwise and open better communication.
   We worked out an agreement that money should not be an issue between us, and not assign the value of our contribution based on monetary terms. If I was to pay more monetarily for things (more spare income) – so be it, she can make up for it in other ways and not let it be an equal measure of our contribution to the relationship.
2. You’ll have to be an adult and look at it from the correct, mature perspective. Your partner is not a peer or rival per se, but someone who will be partnering you in financial decisions in the long run. Do you know how many people have to tank the family finances on their spouses’ behalf? Look at it as a win for you both as a couple, not just for him alone. And don’t forget to celebrate the new job together with him, not just be happy for him.

My husband and I have been married for 7 years now and have a daughter. The first time I was invited to dinner at his parents’ house, we had just started dating and only just got together.

I will never forget that day in my life and I am still ashamed of it to this day. Even before we got there I had a stomach ache. His mother made his favorite cocoa for us with extra cream.

Even back then, my stomach couldn’t tolerate dairy products, especially with so much fat. I drank the cocoa anyway because I didn’t want to be rude.

It started shortly after. I had extreme stomach cramps and before I could even stand up, my underwear was completely covered in my liquid shit.

I stayed put because I was afraid that more would come out. My mother-in-law suddenly started yelling at my husband and asked him if he wasn’t ashamed in front of women so disgusting to fart.

He said it wasn’t him but that he smelled it too. At that exact moment I couldn’t take it anymore and shitted everything that was left in me in my pants.

I ran straight into the bathroom and I felt the shit dripping down the floor. When I came back after 40 minutes, all I saw was a huge brown stain on the sofa and my mother-in-law’s face.

She asked me if I wanted another cocoa…

Netizens’ comments

1. So is the stain still there? Did you offer to buy them a new sofa? Did you say yes to the second offer of Cocoa? Still so many questions…
2. I’m glad you’re still together and married, I’d probably be too embaressed to even go on a next date. I hope no one felt the need to share the story of how you met the parents at your wedding
3. I clogged my MIL’s toilet a few years ago. I blamed it on my husband because he pooped 3 times while we were there that day.

In my late twenties and I’m tired

Yeah I understand our society is not meant to work 40 hours a week. I’m exhausted. I recently had to leave a toxic workplace that was quiet firing me.

Started a new job and doing my best, but feel like I’m walking on eggshells. When will the ball drop? Tired of being in survival mode.

My husband and I aren’t saving anything. We’re in a small overpriced home (2k per month). We tried looking at other options but none of them allow pets or have laundry.

We want to have a family but it feels unachievable right now. We have a combined income which barely pays our bills.

We cook most of the time and don’t spend on frivolous things. We have loans and payments to deal with every months, barely. So how can we buy a home and start a family?

Like what is the point lol. Everything is so expensive. The future looks so bleak.

Netizens’ comments

1. Not accusing you of it, so please don’t take it that way, but many people in this country seem to have a problem with living above their means, even to the point of putting themselves in debt to uphold the image.
   Perhaps reevaluating what you pay for everything and getting rid of luxuries that are actual luxuries could help you realign your finances to help you work toward your goals (like owning a home) better.
2. Now is probably the worst time in the last 100 years to benchmark your progress. None of us thriving, we’re all tired, we’re all surviving, just trying to stay employed and keep a roof over our heads. The cost of living is through the roof, bills are astronomical, we’re in a recession….just focus on surviving so that when you come out the other side, you are in a strong position to move forward.
3. To be honest and it likely isn’t something you may want to hear or maybe you have thought of but put it past is stepping up your game to learn a new skill and get a higher paying job. this goes for both you and your husband.
   you may think that this may be a bit late now that you are in your late twenties but there are just times when you seem like you are doing all you can to save money, living frugally, etc etc., and yet you feel like you still don’t have anything to show for

I (29f) am thinking of leaving my disinterested husband (29m).

I’ve been with my husband for 6 years, married for 3. We own a home as well as multiple pets, but are strictly child-free. I am needing advice on 1. if I am being extreme and 2. how to break it to him.

I am a go-getter in life, and have climbed the corporate ladder with zero schooling and simply hard work. My husband works a job that has no growth, no raises, and no interest in him as a person with drive.

He self-proclaims he is “content,” while I have to work hard to support us with our huge salary gap (I make double he does).

As time has passed and we purchased a home and other landmarks, he has refused to try and step up in any manner to help me.

At one point I asked him if he could at least maybe pick up on more chores to help me out since I was desperate to feel any sense of fairness in our day to day.

He refuses to do any extra work, all repairs/services/any sort of issue in our lives falls solely to me since I am “better at figuring things out” than him.

All phone calls, scheduling, problems all fall to me to handle, while his day to day consists solely of video games.

I have even tried to get him into other hobbies (I’m a gamer too, but I think you need to spread your wings passed JUST that), but he claims he has no other interest in life.

I have had MULTIPLE conversations, and by multiple I mean practically every 3-4 months for 2 years, I have these “come to Jesus” talks, trying to get him to step up his game.

We don’t even do holidays anymore because I would buy him gifts, where he would get nothing and claim he “didn’t like what I asked for.”

We spend absolutely zero time together outside of getting food or small talk throughout the day, even though we both work from home.

I am getting to a place where I’d rather hang out with my online friends than spend any alone time with him. I make up stories about him and I having “good times” to my friends, so that they don’t have concern for me and they can “like him.”

He is happy to have me go to my best friends for all my emotional support since it’s not his forte. We don’t text, and when I was away for a week he literally did not message me once.

I went to him after an anxiety attack two weeks ago, and he didn’t even give me attention until I called him out for it.

When we talk, I have to actively ask him to say SOMETHING, or else he will just sit there spacing out, not acknowledging my speaking at all.

Our physical relationship is zero, now I am beginning to wonder if I am just incredibly unhappy with him. I feel like I have given it every chance I can, have tried to set him up for success time and time again, only for his laziness to win out.

I have had all the counseling conversations, but I’m always met with, “I’ll try to be better,” only for nothing to change.

Is this a lost hope? I dropped the bomb last week telling him I was on my last chance, and he’s been trying this past week to be better. Even with his efforts, I feel so apathetic to it all and I have zero trust that it’ll be fixed this time.

He’s been so happy and jovial, it hurts me to think that I am going to drop the “divorce” word on him and hurt him.

I know he loves me and considers me the greatest thing to happen to him, but I can’t help but feel he’s something that’s holding me back.

Any advice on 1. what to do here and 2. if I SHOULD separate, how to talk to him, would be greatly appreciated.

I (28f) had a panic attack after my husband (30m) finished inside me.

My husband and I have been discussing the idea of starting a family for quite some time now, and it’s been a bit of a rollercoaster for me.

Let me give you some context: My husband is absolutely thrilled and ready to dive headfirst into parenthood. He’s been excitedly talking about the prospect of having children for a while, and his enthusiasm is both heartwarming and a little overwhelming.

On the other hand, I’ve been on the fence about it. Don’t get me wrong; I love my husband dearly, and I can see a beautiful future together with a family.

However, I’ve always had some reservations and fears about becoming a parent.

Last night, we decided to take the plunge and try for a baby for the first time. My husband’s excitement was infectious, and I wanted to share in his joy and start this journey together.

But shortly after our intimate moment, I was hit by a wave of panic and anxiety. It was like a sudden storm of uncertainty, and I couldn’t shake the feeling that I might not be ready for this life-altering step.

I’m sharing this here because I desperately need advice, reassurance, or even just to hear from someone who’s been through a similar situation.

Is it normal to have doubts and fears when trying for a baby, even when you love your partner and want to start a family? How do you navigate this emotional turbulence?

My husband has been incredibly understanding and supportive, but I can’t help feeling like I might be letting him down.

I want to be a good partner and potential mother, but I’m struggling with my own insecurities and anxieties. Has anyone here experienced a similar panic attack or moment of doubt during their journey to parenthood?