Today is my daughter’s 10th birthday, and sadly she doesn’t even know I exist.

One year after graduation, I met this wonderful girl and we clicked instantly. It only took a few months before we’re together officially. 3 months after we got together, she got pregnant.

Panicked and feeling totally unprepared to be a husband and father, I asked her to abort the baby. She said we could afford it and insisted on keeping it, and that led to numerous heated arguments that caused the breakdown of our relationship. I was torn, I didn’t want the baby, but I couldn’t bear to lose her, so I didn’t break up with her immediately. Selfish and young me thought of the things that I might need to give up if I were to have the child, like I could no longer travel and go out with friends as and when I wanted, I’d have no time and less money to spend on my hobbies, and my career progression might be delayed. Also, I was hesitant about marrying someone I only knew for a few months, not sure if we’re really compatible, if we both could live peacefully together and gave our baby a loving environment to grow up in. For months I was in denial that this is happening and was so consumed by my own worries and fears, I ended up being absent throughout her pregnancy and decided to break up with her when she was eight months pregnant. She still messaged me on the day she gave birth, saying she wanted me to see and hold our baby because she believed it will change my mind. But I chose to ignore her.

A year later, a mutual friend attended my daughter’s birthday party and told me how adorable and smart she has grown, and all of a sudden I felt immensely guilty and regretful for not being there for my own child. So I attempted to reconnect with my ex, but she refused to meet me. She said I had never been there for her during her toughest days when she needed me the most, and I had never contributed a single cent, what’s the point of letting such a heartless and irresponsible person back into her life now? She said I’m as good as dead, and she and our baby were thriving and happier without me. She then blocked me everywhere. I even went to the extent of dropping by her place to find her, but her parents chased me away and said I’m a horrible person and they’d never accept me as part of their family.

Recently, I found out she is now happily married to a rich startup owner and has a pair of twins with him. Meanwhile, I’ve been on dating app for years and still haven’t found anyone that compares to her. I still remember vividly how comfortable and loved she made me feel, how we both were so happy just doing simple stuff together like cooking and watching shows. I can sense most of my dates are only after my money and don’t genuinely care about me. I’ve been progressing quickly in my career and enjoy comfortable salary, I have freedom to travel anywhere and money to buy anything I want, and I’m moving into my own place soon, but I still feel so empty. Since my peers are mostly married with kids by now and busy with their own families, I barely have anyone to hang out with and I start yearning for a family of my own. Deep inside I feel perhaps I get bad karma for abandoning my partner and child 10 years ago. Perhaps the universe will never grant me another child and I will die alone, I guess I deserve it. I deeply regretted my decision back then and will live in guilt for the rest of my life. Each year on my daughter’s birthday, I will think of her and cry myself to sleep. How can you miss someone so much when you never even meet them?

To anyone dealing with unplanned pregnancy, I hope my story will enlighten you. Please make your decision wisely. Unless there are medical reasons, financial difficulties, or irreconcilable differences as a couple, please try your best to work things out with your partners, bring your child to this world and be there for them.

Anyway, will just leave a note for my ex here since she was from NUS and may follow this page.

Dear A,

I guess by now my apology won’t matter anymore, but I still want to say I’m very sorry. I should never have left you and our daughter and gave up on us. I’m glad you now have a big happy family that you’ve always wanted. I still care for you and our daughter and I really look up to you for being such a capable mother. If our paths ever cross

again and we are fated to be together again, maybe in another life, I promise to be a better man for you.

Love,

S

My husband and I are only married in name and are waiting for his racist father to die.

I’m in a marriage of convenience with my friend, we’ve been married for 12 years. He is quite well off due to trust funds and allowances but he’s unable to access a good portion of his money until his father dies.

His father is a racist who quite frankly I hope burns in hell, but my friend wants to be able to provide for himself and his secret partner. They live together and have three children who his father will never meet.

When his father began to threaten to withhold his allowance unless he hurried up and married, my friend approached me with an offer. Marry him and he’ll buy me a house and after his father dies we’ll divorce.

He even offered a prenup that stated i’m entitled to 25% of all his assets no questions asked at the time of divorce.

I have no interest in romance so I had nothing to lose and agreed. His father thinks we’re having fertility issues and have had unsuccessful rounds of IVF.

I get a monthly allowance from him that means I don’t have to work and the only conditions are that I go to Sunday dinner on his arm and any family events that he’s obligated to attend.

He never stays overnight in the home he got me that is in my name, and I often hang out with him and his partner and their kids.

I’m honestly super happy with this arrangement and I just see it as a great way to get one over on a prick who doesn’t deserve his money. My own parents are aware of this situation but none of my friends know as I don’t see a need to tell them.

Recently my friend who graduated with a “science” degree from NUS complained out of the blue that she couldn’t find any job, so I suggested why don’t she just apply to become a maid. There are many maid agencies around. She looked at me like as if I had just insulted her (she actually did that to herself by taking a life science degree to begin with).

Then, an epiphany dawned on me: if this so-called maid “job” is so terribly insulting and that it’s “unfit for locals” to do, isn’t it really the case that the living conditions and salary for maids is just underpaid by our own standards? It’s not at all a shortage of labor that we need to find desperate foreigners to do these jobs; we are literally offering these jobs beneath our own standards to begin with, is that not literally human exploitation? It’s “basically slavery” if we pay them “basically nothing”. Would you think it’s okay for you or your daughter to work 16 hours a day with half a day off on Sunday for 500 mighty Singapore dollars a month? What makes Singaporeans so special that they can treat other human beings as being fine to do these jobs that aren’t fine for any local to do?

All my “maid-owner” acquaintances are the kind unreasonable person you wish didn’t exist in this world. The selfish, self-centered and inconsiderate kind of person. (Maybe that’s too anecdotal, but whatever.) They always complain about their maids being lazy – oh the irony! And think it fit to scold or punish “their” maids in some spiteful way to “make them learn”. I’m sick of hearing it. I’ve told them off multiple times but as I said earlier, maid-owners just can’t be reasoned with. Im a veteran in these arguments and have learnt to flawlessly defeat their logic in even a way they can understand. They always end up hunkering down on “shaddap” and that it’s their right to own a maid – mind your own business!

Go mind your own business.

No you cant have your surgery, because someone from another dept will be on vacation.

I’m finally resigning from this job. I will never forget when my supervisor denied me Two sick days (I had 20 days left).

I told her about the surgery in May, but the surgery was scheduled for September. The reason was because someone from another dept requested a vacation for that week, but that person has NOTHING to do with my dept or my duties.

Also, she could’ve covered for me because we both hold the same certifications, etc.

She even said tell your dr to change your date to a later time. Excuse me! I had to have a polyp removed from my uterus that caused my miscarriage. Sickening.

Edit: while I was having a miscarriage at work, I needed to have bloodwork the next day to confirm. I start my work day at 9 am , I went to hospital at 8 am. My supervisor was blowing up my phone telling me please don’t be late, and am I done yet? All this while I was miscarrying.

Edit 2: after I had my polyp removal surgery, while I was in the hospital she was blowing up my phone to let me know that there were some things that needed to be typed that she will place them on my desk upon my return; didn’t even ask how I felt.

True sociopath. Glad I’m out next week.

Update: I’m resigning this week. Meanwhile, two other people resigned while I was on maternity, and now I’m leaving. Now she will be the only person in this dept.

Also, when I was pregnant, she wanted a note for all my medical appointments, one time she tried to deny me an appointment for my scan at 12 weeks. I said well I don’t care I’m going to my appointment, she called HR on me and I told them I’m going, and I went.

Netizens’ comments

1. Don’t resign, make them deal with it.
2. I would publicly out her and that company. Absolutely inhumane treatment. Sorry OP!
3. You’re a better person than me. I’d have told my boss where to go and what to rotate on when they got there.
4. You don’t ever delay an important medical appointment for your job, and any employer who suggests otherwise is scum.

I need some serious advice, I got into a relationship with a girl who used to be my best friend’s ex. But their relationship ended more than 11 years ago.

My best friend is a very petty person and does not have many friends.

For me, in a relationship this kind of thing happens when it happens, the feelings develop and things happen and it is not something that is deliberate. But my best friend will see it differently, like a betrayal.

How do I break the news to my friend?

The scenario seems to be, if I go along with this girl I will lose my friend. If I lose this girl I lose both the girl and my friend.

I have been single for several years and not one girl has touched or opened up my heart and given me feelings till now. I would not say that I am madly in love with this girl but my heart has slowly opened up to her after my divorce that ended years ago. The divorce really crushed me and I have been unable to love anyone or have feelings for anyone till now.

Some of my friends told me to do whatever that makes me happy while others told me to go with the flow as the relationship might not last as well.

What should I do?

Found Out My GF Used to Slept with Our Boss

I met my GF in our working place, we fell in love and currently in relationship for 14 months.

Last week one night while she was sleeping I go through her phone tryna find a photo she took of us and out of curiosity I open her whatsapp, while scrolling I saw a familiar number name not saved, to my surprise it was our boss, CEO of the company a married men.

He will find my GF to f her every month or so, sometimes bi-weekly based on the chat history, videos and pictures. They will usually meet in hotels or during conference trips. They last met when we are entering our fourth month, which means they have not met for 10 months or so.

Our boss are multi millionaire with great businesses, and she praises him alot in front of me. I used to be okay with it coz his achievements are undeniably great.

Now, my problem is I couldn’t look at her the same. My mind full of scenes and images of them f-ing each other, intimacy and all. It’s killing me.

Should I leave her and get away from this mental he’ll or should I confront her?

Netizens’ comments

1. Run away my brother
2. The only right answer. 14 months relationship and she was sleeping with her boss for 4 months into the relationship.
3. She cheated on you with him as his mistress, hasn’t deleted his contact/chat and still hits him up. I’d save the proof and leave the relationship/find work elsewhere and then once gone send the proof the the guys wife.
4. I would walk away asap. Sleeping with a married man,then afterwards praising the sob in front of the new boyfriend. Unbelievable. But first tell her you know and how disgusting it is.
5. Drop her, leave the job & tell his wife – Simples

Know of a friend …she was new to work , and upon ending the intern training, she hooked up with the guy who has attended training with her.

The mutual feelings began during training and morphed into a passionate kiss in a club. She was lost and confused as she was attached and the guy was attached by the way.

She really liked the guy but the guy would not break up because of her. The guy invited her to his house for rounds of smash and she would also turn up and leave in the wee hours , paying the cab fare home herself. What an asshole the guy is. My friend is blind. Both attached individuals playing the cheating game. What losers! My friend bawled her eyes out when she confessed to the guy and he couldn’t break off with the Girlf. The useless guy even wrote a letter to my girlf , apologizing for the decision to stick by his current . He got married to the Girlf in the end and had baby. Strangely, till today, my friend is still wondering… what was all that about ? Did he find her so sexy and attractive and just want to have a different smash with someone new. My friend has been blinded by the passionate kiss definitely. The heart racing moment got her blindsided and till date, it remained a bittersweet memory for her. How underground can this get… no amount of apologies will fix the emotional damage though sex had been great . My friend can get quite stupid, seriously.

Here are what netizens think:

• How strange that a ‘friend’ would know and remember so many details about other people’s business. You’re the friend.

• slow week I guess.