I have been with my girlfriend for about 5 years, and the last time we had intercourse was back in March. She refuses to get intimate with me and will do anything to get out of it.

If I touch her in bed, immediately she’ll say something like “oh man I sure do feel sick right now”, “wow I have alot of vaginal pain tonight, oh and hear this [clicks jaw]. Hurts alot”. She even tries to make me grossed out or repulsed. If I do try initiate (kisses, touching etc) she’ll say something like “I wouldn’t go down there if I were you, I’ve had explosive diarrhea all day”. Even if I go in for a spoon, a platonic cuddle or whatever she’ll always comment “you’re not going to try to do it with me are you?”.

If I try ask her in advance, like booking a date, she’ll tell me that planning it makes her anxious and puts pressure. If I try be spontaneous, she “doesn’t have enough time to consent”.

Obviously I have talked to her about this and how it makes me feel. Depending on her mood, it goes either 3 ways:

• she insists theres no problem and our intimate life is normal
• she gets mad, blames me for pressuring her
• she starts crying, saying how much of a bad girlfriend she is and begs me not to leave her

When we aren’t in bed, she clings to me hard. Won’t leave me alone, wants to spend the whole day watching movies (she has literally no hobbies) and gets upset if I want to do something different (“you dont love me? You don’t like hanging out with me?”). How can I want to spend time with someone who is repulsed by the idea of intimacy with me? She won’t even let me shower in peace, will literally just jump in with me and start showering. But god forbid my genitals touch her. Even if I’m on the toilet she’ll be outside talking to me. The only break I get is at work. But even then if I dont nonstop text her on my break I “dont love her enough”. She’s utterly codependent.

The rare times we do have intercourse, foreplay is all my job. I might get a non-interested 30s handy before her “arthritis” starts hurting. She won’t even attempt oral with me. She won’t get on top either. Its always “too difficult”. Basically she’s just a piece of plywood in bed. But despite her best efforts not to enjoy it, I always make her come 2-3 times. But me, I can’t finish anywhere in, on or near her (tissues only). Afterwards she tells me how good it was and we should do it more. But if I try to initiate in the next couple of days, she’s in “too much pain from last time”.

Two years ago when my birthday was approaching, I asked her months in advance if she could do something naughty for me. All I asked is if she could wear some lingerie I bought her and if she could try initiate with me the morning of. She literally fake slept until noon, and when I was in the shower she got up and made pancakes as an apology. I said its fine and we can maybe try again tonight. All of a sudden, she drops the sharpest kitchen knife we own on her foot. Blood everywhere. Ensue hospital trip. Spent the whole day in emergency. Afterall, why was she using a sharp cooking knife for pancakes? Obviously I can’t prove it was on purpose.

Now before everyone starts having a go at me, I’m not some intimacy-deprived machine that’s constantly trying to molest her. I try to initiate maybe once a fortnight, and in between that I always try be very romantic by taking her on dates, buying her gifts and visiting her at work. I honestly have no memory of any time where she initiated. I’ve asked her about this, and she straight up will tell me “I wont initiate. I dont like to”. She won’t elaborate any further.

So I am engaged to my boyfriend (now fiance) and the truth is, I am only with him for his money, and he is only with me for my good looks. We are getting married very soon, and he is probably going to have an affair and cheat on me sometime in the future but that’s fine with me.

Context: I am aromantic, so I don’t really feel love, ever. Because I am with him, I get to take my friends on holidays twice a year etc. He knows I do not love him. He gets to show me off to friends and I do the housework. Its a win win.

FAQ:

1. What if he leaves you?
   • I have a masters degree and 100k in savings
2. What if he makes you sign a prenup?
   • I will sign it. A prenup is a pre-negotiated set of terms before a marriage in case of divorce. Its not just “she doesnt get anything”.

If there is a prenup, I will ask for the condo and one of the cars along with maybe one other property. I am not sure there will be though, because we are ring shopping and it has not yet come up

Netizens’ comments

1. I think it’s fine if you are both on the same page and ok with the arrangement. This is how marriage has worked for many couples for thousands of years.
2. Listen, I married for love & I’ve been broke all my life. You do you, sista.
3. My best friend and I joke around all the time that we’re going to marry some rich old guys and then marry for love after they die. We happened to be saying this while at Victoria’s Secret one day when the woman in front of us turns around and says “I did it, it wasn’t worth it.”
4. I’M SORRY, I CAN’T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF MY FERRARI
5. I have divorced in exchange for debt, does that count?

I have two biological daughters “Cara” and “Daisy” and a stepdaughter “Emma”

I married Emma’s dad when they were all in their early teens. I’m going to be honest, and I’m not trying to get slammed for being a bad mom, but Daisy was a bad child.

she threw temper tantrums well into adulthood, snuck out at night, talked back to teachers.

I did take her to multiple therapists, but it didn’t help.

Cara was a very easy child, and Emma didn’t get in trouble but can be very rude, selfish, and when she was older she slept with a boyfriend of Daisy’s (Emma’s dad refused to put her in therapy and claims she’s fine)

Emma and Cara are best friends. They do literally everything together. Daisy is not close to either of them.

I would also like to say Daisy has grown up to be a lovely young woman. She does still struggle with emotional regulation but she is 85% better.

Cara got married 4 years ago and Daisy was pretty jealous. Emma was the maid of honor and was not nice to Daisy.

Daisy ended up dropping out of the wedding the day of because she had been in the bathroom for a while (crying I think) and when she came out, Emma said if she did anything to mess up the wedding, she would push her into the cake.

Everyone laughed and Daisy left and turned her phone off for 3 weeks.

Daisy got a boyfriend about a year later and got even better with her emotional issues, and I’m very proud of her.

Daisy is now getting married, but is embarrassed because she only has one best friend and he had a lot of people to be groomsmen, so she asked Emma and Cara.

Emma declined because the dress didn’t match her hair. Cara said she didn’t want to do it without Emma.

This annoyed me because Cara literally doesn’t do anything without Emma. it borders on co-dependence.

I snapped at Cara that her hair matches everything, so she doesn’t have an excuse and it is pretty sad that she is more concerned with her step-sister than her real sister.

I told her I was disappointed. Daisy began tearing up and asking me to stop because I was embarrassing her.

Cara yelled back that I always prioritized Daisy’s issues and she feels Daisy was mean to her and she can’t move past it and hopes Daisy’s fiancé cheats (I found that awful because Daisy is so in love, I’ve never seen her like this)

Where we are right now is Cara is hardly talking to me, Daisy is saying if she was mean to Cara it was only because Emma was mean her, and Emma is saying if she bullied Daisy it was because she was being ill treated at her mom’s house and we weren’t helping her (unfortunately we didn’t know)

I hate how divided we are, and I hate that Cara thinks I love Daisy more and doesn’t want to talk to me because I lost my temper with her.

A few weeks ago, I was out with a friend to drink and unwind along Haji Lane and found a chill cafe/bar, and we sat outside. We then ordered our drinks at happy hour prices at like $10 for 2 bottles of beers.

There is this chinese guy (Alex) came to our table and wanted us to do him a favour by switching our table with him because his friend has a dog and the restaurant is not okay with having pets for the indoor seating. We were just started drinking so I offered him that if he is willing for the 4 drinks we were having at the moment, I would switch it with him. He said okay. (FOR MANY TIMES)

so my friend and I changed to the indoor seating instead. His friends came to talk to us. And one of his Caucasian friend from UK(Gerald or something) keep asking us whether we want to order more drinks. We rejected multiple times because we didn’t want to drink anymore and also didn’t want to spend so much on drinks as the happy hours had over. (We didn’t initiated him to buy us any drinks!!!) He insisted on buying us drinks and ordered for 3 glasses of gin and tonic that costs $24 per glass for us and himself.

When the drinks had arrived, the waitress asked for the payment for the bill because they are doing the closing for the day. The bill was $130 + which includes the first around of drinks that Alex had promised to pay and second of drinks that Gerald had promised to pay, right?

This is the best part. Gerald refused to pay. And then went on and say his card is not working etc. I was like, are you expecting us to pay for your drinks right now? He had the nerve to respond and said “yes, I am not paying”. I have never met anyone as shameless as this dude. The best masterpiece of Mother Earth.

So I went to tell Alex, the first round of drinks should be on him (as promised) and the second round of drinks should be on your friend and right now your friend is refusing to pay for his own drinks. Do you know Alex said? He told me to fxxx off and then he shames me publicly as in I am some kind of girls who can’t pay for their own drinks.

Side note: I heard him whispered to the waitress, saying that he would only pay for the “certain types” of drinks. Seem like there is some kind of “agreements” were going on between him and the restaurant.

Anyway I am fine if he can’t afford the “happy hours drinks” even though he had promised but the way of him humiliating us is disgusting.

After that, I didn’t want to drag the waitress into this mess so I just give out my card and paid for the bill. (Even though there is $74 worth of drinks weren’t ordered by me or my friend). And then we left the place.

The intention of this post is to warn y’all on this group of shameless people you might encountered while y’all go to haji lane :)) please do not fall into their trap. Thanks for reading!

I have just been released from my stint in jail after more than half a year ago and I have been jobless and struggling to get a hold of a decent job ever since.

I’m not ashamed of my past: every saint got a past, every sinner got a future.

I did time in prison for assault, I whacked this guy until he ended up in the hospital because he slept with my girlfriend at the time.

I am ashamed of my actions and have served my punishment, I’m trying to move on with my life now and doing my best to raise my 2 year old daughter as a single father.

But it hasn’t been easy to secure employment due to my conviction, I can’t get a decent full time job, even with my aviation engineering diploma.

The last time I held proper employment was before I was jailed, and I have been doing Grabfood these few months to get by.

Our expenses have been eating most of my salary from Grab, and much as I want to chiong Grab delivery, I really can’t because I still have to take care of my daughter.

I make about $1.5k every month, and after paying for the bills, food, diapers, nursery fees, babysitter (there’s no one to care for my daughter) toys, and etc, I’m left with practically nothing.

I work in the day time and at night I keep sending out dozens and dozens of my resume, hoping to secure employment.

in all of my employment applications, I am honest about my conviction because they are gonna check anyway, so might as well be honest.

Maybe it is one of the reasons why my employment keep getting rejected, meanwhile i am down to my last dollars – i have about $23 left in my bank account.

I don’t know how to get by and I have a daughter to feed, and my parents are out of the picture, they passed away a few years ago.

My ex-girlfriend is also out of the picture, god knows where the f she disappeared to with that other man…

I’m leaving my husband tomorrow, Days like this I just want time to freeze so I can’t have more time to think.

I’ve finally had enough, I love him, but it’s not enough anymore. He has such a drinking problem and refuses to even acknowledge it and I feel like it’s the final nail in the coffin.

He’s maxed out two credit cards on going out and drinking. He’s choked me out while he’s drunk, and on the same night assaulted someone else.

After that, I completely stopped getting intimate with him. I couldn’t handle the idea of him touching me, let alone sleeping in the same bed together.

Did he understand it? Not even slightly, he just kept pushing and pushing intimacy on me so I caved in and let him sleep with others so he wouldn’t be angry with me for not fulfilling his needs.

He stopped couples therapy two years ago, while I continued it.

He goes out to find prostitutes and drinks with his friends and spends massive amounts of money till the earliest hours of the morning and expects me to be okay with it and not question him or what he does.

He says the meanest things; “I’m only good for having *expletive withheld* in my mouth” “You’ll never amount to anything” “Nobody wants you.”

The part that I want to get off my chest is that even though he’s hurt me in ways I never thought I’d experience and he’s the biggest jerk in the universe…

Leaving him feels like one of the hardest things I’ll ever have to do in my life.

I’m scared, because I have no idea what I’m going to do tomorrow.

Netizens’ comments

• You. Deserve. More. You deserve to be happy. I hope the next chapter of your life brings you the joy you’ve been robbed of. Good luck to you in every way.

• I am sorry you’re going through this. I can definitely see how it can be hard to leave him, but know & remember you’re doing what’s best for you. I wish you all the best.

I went out last night and I must say I did NOT expect to get as wild as I ended up doing. I went out with a few friends and I wore a pretty short skirt and crop top. I was kinda dressing revealingly and I did plan on seducing men, but I didn’t expect to go to the extent i did.

For the first hour or two at the club I just danced and danced with a few guys and had some shots before this one really tall hot guy asked if he could get me a drink.

After getting me a drink we danced and his hands went all over my body and even under my skirt. I got really turned on.

He whispered in my ear that we should go out to his car for a smoke break and I agreed. We didn’t even get to smoking cause the moment we got into his car we started making out and I ended up pulling his D out of his shorts and sucking it in the front seat of his car.

I said we should go in the back and I rode him and let him f me for like 15 minutes in the backseat of his car.

He actually made me finish which I was surprised by cause I usually can’t finish in an uncomfortable place like a car but I guess I was really in the mood.

He was nice and asked if he could finish inside me and I surprised myself by saying yes since I knew there wasn’t really a way for me to clean up after.

He filled me up and we got out of his car and went back to the club. I think I was pretty f-ed up cause I realized that I actually forgot my panties in his car.

i reached down in the middle of a crowd of people to feel myself and I was literally dripping down the inside of my leg. I felt like such a sl-t

I lost track of the guy who I hooked up with and I couldn’t find him for the rest of the night. I ended up just dancing with some of my friends for a while until eventually another guy came up behind me and started grinding on me.

I was really turned on from the previous encounter and knowing that I was “full” inside, and I let him grind on me and feel me from behind.

At one point his hands found their way under my skirt and when he felt that I wasn’t wearing any panties, he started getting hard.

He rubbed me down there and whispered in my ear that I was naughty for being this wet and not wearing any panties.

If only he knew lmao. I let him play with me for a few minutes before telling him that I had to go find my friends and leaving.

What an eventful night I definitely won’t forget it.

asking for money when my kids stay with me?

I have 9yo and 6yo boys with my ex. She’s married to Michael who has a 9yo boy Xander and lives full-time with them.

Xander and my 9yo are not just stepbrothers but best friends. They get along so well that they share a room and a king sized bed. You cannot separate them.

I find the whole thing funny so Xander comes to my house whenever I have my own kids (Wednesday through Saturday).

The thing is that Xander is a rubbish bin and eats everything. I took the three of them to eat some fast food and Xander ate four cheeseburgers.

Seriously. An hour later he said he was hungry and ate 6 waffles. He’s definitely not fat. He’s skinny.

I asked his dad if be could transfer me $20 because this kid won’t stop eating and he said why am I putting a price on our children’s friendship.

He said that it was tacky. I told him that his kid ate $16 worth of burgers in one sitting. He said that he often pays for my sons food so why can’t I pay his son’s?

Netizens’ comments

1. I agree with Michael – it’s tacky.
   Rather than giving him 4 cheeseburgers which is a ridiculous amount of calories, you have to learn to say No – you are the adult here, and you get to set the rules in your own house.
   If you’re giving them breakfast, lunch and dinner plus a few healthy snacks – you can say “hey bud, I think you’ve had enough of that”.
   Some kids can’t moderate themselves well and need adult supervision to help them create healthy habits.
   That said, I wouldn’t risk the relationship for the sake of your son, and co-parenting well with your ex and her husband. A few cheeseburgers simply isn’t worth it.
   If you can’t afford the extra costs, set a limit and make sure they know that they can only have 2 burgers. Totally reasonable!
2. You are providing free childcare to a 9 year old, it is not the same as Michael and your ex paying for your boys.
   Ask Michael if he’s up for for buying meals for your girlfriends 6 year old, along with free childcare.
3. you are not his parent and if you dont feed the kid enough and he complains to his father the shit will hit the fan… Little guy should be shipped to you with at least a little of allowance for his needs.
   What does he call you? Does he think you are his step dad or smth?

Ok, so I (20F) have been best friends with this guy (20M) since we were 15. Purely platonic. And when I say best friends, I mean BEST friends.

He likes me more than his male friends and I like him more than my female friends.

Throughout the years, we never did anything more physical than hug on rare occasion and I never got the feeling that he wanted to hook up.

When people at parties or whatever would ask if we’re together, he would say no and that he would never get with me.

At the risk of sounding conceited, I’d say I’m an attractive person, which led me to believe that he just wouldn’t want to ruin our friendship over a hookup and I was fine with that and it didn’t offend me.

Anyway, we got drunk one night alone at my place and started hooking up. He asked to f me and I said no because I had forgotten to take my birth control that night.

Then, a few days later, we f. Then, a couple days later, we f again. That pattern has repeated for a couple months.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s easily the best f-ing of my life, but it’s starting to mess with my head. We hang out every day and cuddle every night and f a few times a week, but the conversation of actually dating has never come up.

He even does all the cutesy things like kisses on the head and play fighting. I’m wondering if he thinks I’d reject him or if he just doesn’t see me as girlfriend material.

This is becoming increasingly difficult though, because I want a boyfriend and have another guy (21M) in my life who could potentially be that person.

Do I just let things play out like they are or do I stop sleeping with someone I love because he won’t ask me out?

Guy #2 and I have also been friends for years, and we have SO much in common and very similar life plans. Guy #1 is someone I love tremendously, but we also have different plans in life. Help, I’m stuck.

I got laid off from my job.

I had been working as an electrical trainee for almost 6 months. Everyone loved me and I was immensely popular in the company. I almost got laid off (or fired) in August, because of a few things:

1: I used my phone “too much” (IE: pulling it out to check the time occasionally, answering texts from my family once in a while, and replying to work emails).

2: Taking “too many bathroom breaks,”. I have IBS and IBD, so I had to use the bathroom once every hour, and I even explained the issue to them.

3: I was making some mistakes. Since everyone liked me, nobody told me I was making them, and they fixed my mistakes without notifying me at all.

4: I ate a handful of Skittles from the candy jar in the shop office. The boss accused me of eating all the Skittles, and I didn’t.

5: Not taking a long lunch. Company norm is combining your rest breaks with your lunch to create a longer lunch. I didn’t do that because I am prediabetic, and I needed the time to eat a handful of cashews or an apple and recharge.

6: “Leaving early”. Everyone told me that the shift was 7-3 Mon/Thurs, and 7-2 on Friday. I left at those times.

Anyways, I was given a second chance, and I didn’t use my phone as much. But on Thursday night on my way to a concert, my boss called me.

He told me him and the vice president of the company had done some talking, and they were going to go ahead and lay me off. I just said “okay” because I didn’t know what else to say. Please let me know what you think.

Netizens’ comments

1. “Everyone loved me and I was immensely popular in the company.”
   Apparently not
2. You were fired. Not laid off.
   Looking back at your previous postings. You come off like a problematic employee. Health issues aside. Sounds like they had just had enough of you.
3. This sounds like a just firing and you sugarcoating the issues. I can’t imagine why an apprentice would need to check his phone regularly during work. Any relevant information would be relayed to you by your direct supervisor.