I met my bf on a dating app because I was looking for a love marriage however my bf acts as if this is an arranged marriage.

My bf told me that his mom was trying to hook him up with girls but he wanted to find his own love so he went on a dating app. We met and throughout our relationship, my bf let’s his mom make the calls in our relationship for example;

• he promised that he would take me on vacation and his mom told him no because he hasn’t met my parents yet. He was down to take me until his mom said no.
• his mom constantly pressures me and asks me when my bf is going to meet my parents. I thought she was just pushing her own agenda on me because my bf doesn’t even ask me or talk to me about these things…. later on I find out that he resents me cuz he hasn’t met my parents yet. Point is my bf doesn’t communicate what HE wants. It’s always what his mom wants for him.
• whenever we have conflict in our relationship he goes straight to his mom as if he needs her approval/ validation/ advice
• he told me he wouldn’t marry me unless his mom approves of my family
• he sports gambles everyday but won’t stop because he doesn’t have responsibilities such as a wife or kids. You’d think if he was in love and wanted those responsibilities he would change and work towards becoming better for us. But apparently it isn’t real to him until his mom approves of my family.
• he relies on his moms approval for big decisions such as a buying a house for us. He doesn’t even bother to ask me what I think or want

In a love marriage it’s one thing to make sure that your partner gets along with your parents but it’s another to let your parents completely dictate what you can and cannot do within a relationship/ during conflicts. To me this feels like an arranged marriage.

My bf doesn’t understand my way of thinking and I can’t understand his.

He said he didn’t want an arranged marriage but it just feels like he picked his own partner out and bought her to his mother so that she could arrange his marriage for him. I don’t get how it can work both ways.

I went into this wanting a love marriage but it seems like this is more of an arranged marriage..

Can anyone help me understand his perspective..,

Has anyone encountered issue with Samsung TV servicing? My experience for the past 2 months has been horrendous.

Bought a 65in QLED 3 years ago (Mar’20). Everything was fine until 25 Dec’22 (clearly remember the day as that’s how my Christmas was ruined) when TV started having issues (screen tearing, severe ghosting and white-ish screen).

Contacted the helpline, prompt response and technician came down 3 days later to inspect my TV and informed me that my panel requires replacement, but unfortunately there’s no available stock and will have to wait for at least 1 week. After 2 weeks without any updates, I contacted the helpline again and were told that they will escalate to the relevant technical dept, after which I will be given a callback. This repeated for 1 month, with me constantly calling in and contacting via the live chat on a weekly basis with promise of callback, just to get nothing.

After a month and escalation to the ‘higher management’, they finally arranged for the panel replacement on 8 Feb’23. And guess what, exactly 1 week after the replacement, the exact same issue happened again. Contacted the helpline again and was told to provide photos of the issue.

After calling/live-chatting every other day for update, the only response I got was ‘pending update from relevant team’, without any plans to arrange for technician to inspect this time round, though they are ‘looking into things’. After 2 whole weeks, they finally called me and requested for photos of the picture test. 2 bloody weeks. And till now, my TV is still faulty and the only reply I get from both channels (helpline and live-chat) is that it’s still pending update from higher management after escalation, with no solution in sight.

Does this even make sense? At this point if they don’t have a proper solution, shouldn’t they offer a replacement unit?

Anyone feels inferior when they are of a very different education / earning status than their partner?

For example: You went to a neighbourhood secondary school, went to polytechnic and have been working as a diploma holder as you did not go through university education (for some reason)

You have a partner who went to an IP school, went to an elite JC, got 90 RP for A Levels and furthered their studies in a prestigious university in Singapore, eventually working and drawing way more salary than you

Would you feel inferior and scared that your partner will choose to leave for someone who is around the same “status” as them? Honestly, I feel like this too.

Netizens’ comments

1. Yes, that’s why it’s also good to ensure that you can support yourself independently, just in case your partner has a change of heart. Never ever ever put your heart 100% into someone or trust your MONEY (especially money) with someone else, not even your partner. Life is like that, if you really think about it (deeply), actually you are on your own, whether you have a partner or not…
2. It’s optimistic to assume that you will even get that kind of a partner.. unless you are a hot girl of course
3. You can’t change the fact that your partner is a very accomplished person, some people are just built different. But you can change how you view your relationship. It would be very unhealthy if you continue to fester feelings of insecurity that may potentially escalate to jealousy.
   Your partner may be great, but he/she is not god. Stop looking at what he has that you don’t and start looking at what you have that he may not have. You will definitely have something to offer that they do not. Maybe you’re better at dealing with people than they are, maybe you’re funny person and they like your company, maybe you’re compassionate and kind and they feel good being around you. Look at them for who they are and not what they’ve accomplished. I think it would make your relationship a lot healthier.
4. Marriage means shared success, failure, happiness, sadness, any anything between. What the other lacks might be you have plenty of. In the end, you still need to love yourself so what overflows is shared to your partner.

hired on the spot for an office job – red flag?

went for an interview today and was hired on the spot. they were even keen to let me sign the contract there and then, and i was initially thrilled, but i told them i’d think about it over the weekend.

now looking back it’s weird that 1) i got hired after some 20 mins of deliberation and 2) the people who interviewed me weren’t even the bosses. i was told the bosses are overseas for work.

is this… normal?

edit – op exec role, above $3k, probation period 4 mo, notice period during probation 2 days, SME.

Netizens’ comments

1. Yea red flag. I think you should ask a week to decide but beggars can’t be choosers.
2. Hahah yeah very sus. Usually it’ll take a week or longer. Highly likely high turnover rate aka shitty job
3. Yes! My first job was like that, after working I realised why no one wanted to do the job
4. Could be a red flag. But … It happened to me…I was last candidate of 6 or 7 (didn’t know it then). Was offered the job after twenty minutes I walked out after interview ended. Its my 11th year with them now.
   You can still ask questions before accepting. List down potential concern areas and see if you can get info from someone in the organisation.
5. It’s likely they squeeze you in the 4 months and just before that they fire you with 2 days notice. The notice is a requirement to be paid by law so with 2 days notice they are really setting up a 4 months hire and fire cycle cheaply
6. Nope. Read the contract extremely carefully and look up the company on ACRA
7. May or may not be a red flag. I got hired and signed contract within 5 hours after my interview. The company was actually not bad and I’ve seen them hire others on the spot also. It wasn’t because they were desperate but they felt that as long as you hit the criteria and not super weird they were okay with hiring you.
8. I also got hired on spot during the interview about a month ago. So far I’ve worked for 1 month as a junior auditor for this co. and I really don’t have any complaints? My co. has high turnover rate too because of them wanting to progress further in career which my co. doesn’t have the capacity to offer since it’s small-mid size. I found the work alright tho, I’m learning a lot. My plan is to leave too as soon as I get my experience so conclusion is, reasons might vary for each company.

Is it abnormal to be THIS annoyed with a co worker

Just a bit of background to this, 3 months ago, I left a highly toxic job environment and started a new role at a new company.

For the 1st 2 weeks it was really difficult, I was doing something that was really out side of my comfort zone, leading projects i had no expertise in and interfacing with teams around the clock operating on clashing timezones.

However i stuck it out and thereafter, i felt much better & developed a really good working relationship with my new boss. He was really experienced and helped me navigate a lot of the challenges i faced.

A week ago, the worst thing happened, my boss got retrenched, and me being the one with the next most senior title in the team was tasked to take over his responsibilities. On top of what i am currently doing, I now also have to oversee a team of 2.

Since then my life has been hell. The problem was not even the crazy workload but one of my coworkers whom i am supposed to oversee.

This particular coworker has been in the company for the longest compared to the other 2 of us. She has this habit of always trying to give us advice because of her experience in the company, but always failing to articulate what she wants to say. Half the time i am confused by her. She often likes to give me feedback on my presentation skills and comment on how I led the meeting and this confuses me because she hardly ever contributes to the meeting and behaves like she is some meeting inspector/evaluator.

Because I have to oversee what she does and report to my new line manager, we recently sat together to go through her projects and what shocked me was how little she was doing compared to the rest of the team members. And her project list were made of projects that had not beeen completed since 2021, or phantom projects no one assigned her. At the end of the session i was just exasperated when she asked me about my projects and when will i be sharing my progress with her.

I am facing a lot of difficulties reigning her in, our team is undergoing restructuring and the company has freezed our outstanding projects in order to cost cut. But just the other day I caught her commiting additional budgets for future projects which were not confirmed. I tried to tell her nicely that she shouldn’t do that because it makes it difficult for me to negotiate with the agency later on. She completely wrote me off and insisted that my ex boss (who is no longer in the company) gave those projects to her and hence they should be confirmed. I couldn’t get her to understand circumstances have changed and our budget might be reduced moving forward.

Recently I disagreed with the way she was handling another project, again she wrote me off by saying that i dont understand the background of the project. I just asked her to explain to me and again, she couldn’t articulate her point and simply said “you’re too new you wont understand”.

and GUESS WHAT? shit hit the fan, our team tio complaint which was escalated all the way to the HQ. and my line manager asked me to provide an explanation as to why things escalated so much. my co worker who is in charge of the project just MIA, and here i am, almost midnight on a friday night, typing a report about an incident i dont even have the details to.

I feel like i am so annoyed with this co worker that it has become borderline obsessive. Like i get this impression that she really wants to dominate me, but at the same time, expect me to proof read her emails and sign off cost estimates for her projects so that she dont have to take ownership for anything. She often tells me “Boss, i got this problem, what should i do?” and when I share with her my opinion, she will always reply ” I see, you are still too inexperienced at this/ oh you dont know the history of this nevermind lah..” blah blah and totally write me off. Worst thing is i dont think she is doing it intentionally, its probably just her personality.

I feel a lot of anxiety and stress because my work load and responsibilities have increased ten fold and there is a loose canon in my team i cannot manage. I just feel like giving up, and it’s only been 3 months!!!! I feel super frustrated, what should i do?

Six months ago, I thought I had it all. I had married the love of my life, a Chinese woman who had come to SG to work.

We had a beautiful wedding, and I was sure that our marriage would last forever.

Then came the start of my nightmares

Little did I know that our marriage would be short-lived and that my wife would end up wiping out my entire bank account just six months after we said “I do.”

I can still remember the fateful day when my wife asked me to transfer money from my account to her personal one.

She said that she needed the money to buy some things for our apartment. I had no reason to distrust her, so I made the transfer.

Little did I know that this was the beginning of the end.

Every other week, she would ask me for some money saying that something happened back at her hometown.

While some things sounded like red flags, I didn’t have much reason not to trust her and I did the transfer to her.

Suddenly, she disappeared

Then came the shock of life. My wife suddenly disappeared and was no where to be found.

Her belongings were all gone from our place. She had also taken all the money from our joint account and vanished without a trace.

I was left with an bank account both personal and joint, no money, and no way to find her.

I was devastated and angry. How could she do this to me? I had trusted her, and she had betrayed me.

I had invested so much time and money into our marriage, and she had just taken it all away.

Had to take out another job to pay my debts

I had to take out loans to pay off my debts, and I was forced to find an extra job to make ends meet.

My wife has now left me for a while. I am still struggling to pick up the pieces of my life and to move on from this nightmare.

I am still haunted by the memory of my wife taking away everything I had worked so hard for.

My life has been turned upside down, and I’m still not sure if I will ever recover from this tragic experience.

All I know is that I will never trust another woman again.

I had just purchased my very own condominium. After years of saving, my hard work had finally paid off. I was so excited to finally have the place of my own, away from the control of my parents.

I was an adult now, or so I thought. Little did I know that my parents had hatched a plan to move in with me because I ‘upgraded’ to a condo.

Wanted to stay with me because it was a condominium

I showed my parents the condominium and they were overjoyed. They had supported me through the entire process, excited to see my hard work pay off. They weren’t prepared, however, for the news that I would be living there alone.

My parents were in shock. The idea that their grown son, who was almost 30 years old, would be living on his own was a difficult concept for them to grasp.

The truth was, they wanted to move in with me so that they could show off that they would be living in a condo.

I tried to tell them no but they insisted

Of course I was not okay with that and I had to come up with another way to tell them that I didn’t want them living with me.

Despite my pleas and explanation that I was now an adult and could handle my own responsibilities, they were unconvinced.

No matter how I explained, they insisted that they move in with me and gave reasons like they could help me around with the house.

I was appalled. I could not believe that my parents were so insistent. They had no idea how ridiculous their suggestion was.

I argued for hours, but they refused to listen. In their minds, it was the only way they could ensure that their son was safe and taken care of.

I had no other choice. I gave in and allowed my parents to move in with me.

The next few months were a nightmare. My parents were constantly in my business, checking up on me and making sure I was doing my chores. It was like living with a couple of babysitters.

I had no privacy, no freedom and no control over my own life. I felt like a prisoner in my own home. I was so unhappy that I started to dread coming home every day.

I was eventually able to convince my parents to move out, but it took a lot of arguing and negotiation. It was a long and difficult process, but it was worth it in the end.

I never thought that my parents would be so out of touch with reality. I was so relieved to finally have my own space and my own life back.

I made the biggest mistake of my life when I decided to marry a rich man. I was never in love with him; I just saw him as an opportunity to make a better life for myself.

I was naive and desperate, and I thought it would be easy to take his money and have a good time.

Lived the high life, then started to fool around

I married him and immediately had access to all his wealth. He trusted me with his money, and I took advantage of that. I would go out with my friends and buy expensive gifts for myself. I was living the high life, and I loved it.

Unfortunately, I wasn’t satisfied with just spending my husband’s money. I started to have affairs with other men. I would go out with them and use my husband’s money to pay for our dates. I thought I was getting away with it, but I was wrong.

My husband eventually found out about my affairs and the money I was spending. He was furious and demanded a divorce. I was devastated, but I knew I deserved it. I had taken advantage of his trust and loyalty, and I had to face the consequences.

The divorce was long and painful. My husband took back all the money I had stolen from him, and I was forced to start from scratch. I had to move back in with my parents and work hard to make ends meet.

I had made so many mistakes, and I was paying for them. I had thought that marrying a rich man would make me happy and give me a better life, but I had been wrong. I was now poorer than ever and had to live with the guilt of what I had done.

At least I had learned my lesson. I had seen first-hand how easy it was to take advantage of someone and how much damage it could do. From now on, I would never make the same mistake again