[22 F & 28M] my boyfriend said he had the time of his life hanging out with another girl

My boyfriend and I went out clubbing last weekend with some of our friends.

There was this one girl sitting at a table so we asked if we could sit with her and she said yes and we started talking to her.

I had a friend come later so I went and met up with her (in the same club) and we hung out inside for a bit before we left her table.

I don’t remember what I said or how this happened but my boyfriend said that he had the time of his life hanging out with this girl that he had only just met.

I guess that made me feel a bit weird. She was pretty cool but I guess it just feels weird that my boyfriend said that about another girl when he’s not said that about hanging out with me.

Netizens’ comments

1. Yeah, that is weird. Did the exchange contact info?
   • (OP) Yes, they added each other on messenger.
     • Well then, you have new competition.
2. Assuming you don’t want to just break up you should tell him how it has made you feel and press him about their contact. Ask him to show you his account where she was added (ask him to do it without delay cause otherwise he might delete things). Ask him also where he was so long without notifying you.
   He might refuse your attempts to confirm situation, call you controlling and what not. That is fine, he can refuse what he wants, but at this point I would just leave him.
3. The best time of his life? What the hell did these couple of barflies talk about that was so amazing?
   Important question – does your boyfriend leave the house much? Does he have a healthy group of friends he sees often? Or is he a homebody?
   I’ve see this kind of reaction before and I’m willing to bet it was quite one-sided. Guys who aren’t used to getting any attention whatsoever get an hour of conversation with a random woman who may or may not even be that attractive and the novelty of the experience just blows their mind and they think they’re in love.
   One time I went to a friends party and met her new boyfriend. He was not my type at all and I just spent like half an hour getting to know him because he was dating my friend and I’d figure I’d be seeing more of him in the future.
   We had a nice chat. I talked to many other people at the party too and didn’t give him any special attention, I thought.
   Turns out I made such an impression on him that he broke up with my friend and told her that he wanted to be with me – he didn’t even bother to learn that I was in a long-term serious relationship before he did that.
   That’s my one personal story, I’ve seen and heard this happen to a lot of girls who are casually polite to a stranger. This is massive loser behavior to be honest. Not attractive at all.
   I understand why you’re feeling weird and jealous about it, but honestly you should also feel sorry for him that this was apparently “the best time of his life.”
   Frankly I think if you’re confident in yourself, you should encourage him to try to be friends with her. If he sees something good about her that is legitimate, then she’d probably be a cool friend to you, too.
   After getting to know her better he’ll lose his rose-colored glasses/beer goggles and realize she’s probably just a normal person and maybe he can be cool about it. If she was flirting with your boyfriend and that what this whole thing is about, and she wants to steal him, let her have him.
   She’d be doing you a favor getting him out of your hair.

My husband (m25) wants to divorce me (f24) because I’m “lazy”

My husband (m25) and I (f24) have been together for 8 years, married for 3 years. He has been distant for 5 months now. Barely speaking to me or when I speak to him he’s always on his phone ignoring what I’m saying.

Very little communication, he’s been sleeping in the guest room and we haven’t had any intimate activity since then.

Recently we had the talk… He says he hates that I don’t work much, I don’t “pull my weight” around the house and I don’t cook for him. He pays everything except for wifi and the phone bill which I pay for.

I work Monday-Friday 7am-2pm and my husband works 3pm-11pm. I come home to our 7 year old son hungry because all he was fed was cereal at 9am. After making him a quick lunch and settle in I usually clean up the kitchen that is always a mess from the morning.

Once I’m done I either go on a walk with my son or at the park. I then start dinner. After dinner we hang out watch movies/play then it’s time for showers and bedtime. When he’s all settled in I clean up the kitchen, spot clean around the house and throw away the trash.

Apparently, I have to meal prep my husband’s food because he doesn’t eat unless I make him food. I need to deep clean the whole house every day.

I don’t know what he does during the day but every time I see him when he’s not working he’s playing video games. It’s not fair that he gets to do everything he wants but I get yelled at for no reason.

I get so stressed and overwhelmed. When I tell him how much work it is I always get told “it’s your job”. We’ve always had issues. My main issue is that he’s not romantic or lovey with me anymore. I haven’t had one gift from him since the 2nd year. No anniversary, birthday or Valentine’s Day gift.

He wants me to change but I can’t. I’m trying my best and this is all I can push myself to do. It just hurts because I still love him so much and I feel like he hates me.

Lessons from my encik. What did he teach you?

My encik in BMT taught me how to siam child support payments. My encik in unit told me when the small head think, the big head cannot think one.

But most importantly my unit encik taught me that just because you are in a higher office, doesn’t mean you can screw your friends from your previous office. You may need them one day.

And sure enough, he was posted back to the unit he came from after his tour in my unit

Netizens’ comments

1. So how to siam? Share can?
   • (OP) Take ur earnings in cash and keep your head down. Any work you do just say you doing for fun and as a passion and not drawing salary especially in arts scene
2. You don’t have to be super upz, just don’t be a burden
3. I had a really good encik. He was the strictest guy I’ve ever met and had high standards for the people below him. He would push us to achieve great things like IPPT gold and stuff and demanded perfect work. But outside of camp he was always nice and always treated me food and stuff like that during team dinners and like hosting CNY at his house. He was really chill and honestly he’s one of the few guys I truly respect even after I ORD’ed
4. My encik taught me this one sentence which is actually pretty damn good. In life, when you do something, do it once and it do it good. Best encik ever tbh really nice guy, very lucky to have him
5. If you cannot, you must can.
6. under-promise, over-deliver
7. My unit encik taught me that promotions at work don’t automatically translate to a better life. He didn’t want promotions from CSM yet because he felt he had achieved a certain work-life balance that he could support with his income. A promotion means taking on extra work and seeing his family less often.

I had been hooking up with this girl for about a month, and last night she came over. Everything was as usual, we hooked up, but when we got up I noticed a brown stain on my white top sheet.

I don’t know if she saw it or not but at first I thought it was dried blood so I took it off and threw it in the closet fast so she wouldn’t be embarrassed. She left shortly after and I looked at the sheets, it’s definitely poo.

Am I wrong to ghost?? Or should I say something? I don’t think it was like a residual poop from not cleaning herself properly, I would have noticed before…

Edit: it might not be poop, it doesn’t smell. Maybe it is just discharge, excuse my ignorance

Netizens’ comments

1. I had this happen once. The gal I was seeing pooped in bed just the tiniest bit, but it really smelled. We both knew what had happened, but it was a new relationship so our communication wasn’t very well established.
   I pretended not to notice and washed the sheets after she left. Continued to sleep with her, never brought it up. I’m sure she was super embarrassed, but it would have done no good to add to it by telling her I noticed.
   And if I’d ghosted her or broken up over it, I would have missed out on the months of enjoyable dating I had with her after that.
   It’s your call, OP. But shart happens!
2. if it didn’t smell then she probably just started her period and it was brown blood/spotting from first day bleeding
3. Probably not poop. Brown discharge can happen for a number of reasons (imminent period or period is ending, birth control pills, etc.)
   Sometimes it looks a bit like poop but has a very different smell/texture. It’s just old blood that has turned brown from oxidation and is being expelled from the body. It’s normal and involuntary.
4. Are you sure not old blood? If it was poop I feel like it would have smelled a lot more potent… once I was done with my period for over 24 hours (that’s my rule lol) and I hooked up with an ex..
   he went to the bathroom and omg I saw it on his bed.. I took soap and water and rubbed it like crazy I was so embarrassed hahahah but it totally looked like dark poo at first.
   It was definitely old blood I put it up to my face like wtf was that me? There was nothing on him or my legs or anywhere else. Assuming it was just like a drop?? Who knows. But unless it smelled, it wasn’t poop