My (F19) new bf (M23) has an STD

I (F19) have been dating this guy (M23) for 4 months, we recently made it official. I lost my virginity to him a month ago and decided to go on birth control.

Last night he had trouble getting hard with a condom on and asked if he could try it without and promised to pull out.

I agreed because I wanted to make sure he finished too. He didnt pull out in time and was really freaked out about it.

He was really sweet and bought me a plan b just incase because the birth control is new.

Today I got a text from him saying that I might want to get tested just in case because he was given an STD by his ex.

Ive been doing research and im freaking out and asked him why he didn’t bring it up.

He said there’s a huge stigma around it and he was afraid I would’ve ghosted him if he told me. I probably would’ve earlier on in the relationship but I really have feelings for this guy now and don’t know what to do.

I can’t talk to anybody else about this because my family is really religious and doesn’t even know I’m dating.

Update: He’s driving me to urgent care because I don’t have a car and he’s taking 100% responsibility for any medical cost.

Thank you guys so much for your responses!! I feel so stupid I’m gonna end it tn. I appreciate all of you so much this has been so helpful, thank you thank you thank you

I’m okay with using women and leading them on

(27M) All throughout my formative years I never had much luck with the ladies. I wasn’t ugly but I was awkward. Still I tried my damnest without success.

There’s only so much rejection one man can take before he becomes bitter and resentful. I was the last in my friendship group to lose my virginity and that was when I was 21.

Being around all my active-in-hook ups friends caused me great insecurity in school and university.

Fast-forward a few years, I’m not exactly rich but I have my life together at least. I have a great job and I’m in much better physical shape than before. Needless to say, this has helped considerably with my dating life.

Rather than settling down though, I’m out to make up for all those years I lost. Many of my partners are cool with casual hookups but others I’ve had to deceive a bit.

In the last couple of years I’ve probably led on a dozen women under the false pretences of a relationship.

I know this is immoral but I just think they had their fun, now I’m having mine. They’re probably used to it by now anyway.

Netizens’ comments

• Sounds like you have a hate problem with women dawg. You need to figure that out otherwise it’s gonna haunt you for the rest of your life
• There’s a decent chance if you dont resolve that it will come back to bite you in the ass when you find someone you do like OR you’ll do it for long enough and wake up one day and everyone else is paired off. Time goes quicker than you realize and can appreciate.
• So you’re hurting and punishing women who never hurt you, just for fun?

advice on some legal matters 🙁 please help

hey everyone, first time posting on here. i’ll just get straight to the point.

basically, im currently going through a divorce, since end of August 2022. i wont go into much details (unless required) however, lets just say that i found out he had been in a bad financial state and had debt. he had been hiding it from me from the entire duration of our relationship before we got married, about 5 years-ish. not only does he owe me a hefty sum of money, he owes others as well.

since end of August, he blocked my number everywhere and have went MIA. i have no way of contacting him at all. i have been receiving letters of the money that he owed from multiple entities. a money lender even came to my house looking for him because he hadnt updated them of his new address. last night, a letter came from a telco company addressing to me (as he had previously signed a contract under my name to use my CIS benefit) stating that he owed that a sum and if it isnt paid within (7) days, legal action will be taken.

as of right now, i also have no sight of the status of the divorce as well as the status of our BTO that will be ready by this year.

its been pretty mentally draining for me because i just want everything to be over. ive tried many ways to contact him, even by going through his friends and family but theyve all ignored me reaching out too.

so im just wondering if there’s anything i can do legally to at least just get him to reply me? or if theres any suggestions on how i can reach out to him?

thanks in advance and i really apologise for any formatting/grammar errors.

(30 m) (27 f) I had a vasectomy. She’s pregnant. I feel like crap

I’ve been with her for 6 years now. I love her. I recently proposed, 5 months ago and she was ecstatic. It was adorable. I don’t care much for weddings but, it was definitely a dream for her to have the whole “fairytale ending.” I don’t regret proposing. All I’m saying is if she was just my girlfriend for the rest of my life I wouldn’t give a damn. She never put pressure on me to propose and I appreciated that.

I got a vasectomy right before I met her. She knew about it from day one. At the time she wasn’t looking for anything serious. the fact that I had a vasectomy made me more attractive. She had a miscarriage with her ex boyfriend right before she met me. She told me that pregnancy was now a fear of hers. I never wanted kids, I was repulsed by the idea of being a dad. Her saying that made her more attractive.

She was never opposed to being a mother though and I knew that going in. She made it clear that being a mother was not a burning desire of hers but, she wouldn’t get an abortion if she ended up pregnant again. She’s definitely “mom material.” She’s the sweetest person I’ve met.

She doesn’t curse, she doesn’t yell, she’s apologetic, she’s always smiling. She’s kind, she’s understanding, she’s a great teacher, she’s intelligent and gentle. Honestly,I don’t deserve her. I’m an a-hole. Obviously she has her flaws too but, she’s truly a good person.

Anyways, she’s pregnant. When she told me I thought she was messing with me. We’ve had pregnancy scares in the past but, we both knew there was no way she truly was. 2 months ago she broke the news. When the pregnancy was confirmed, I immediately accused her of cheating. I feel like shit for how I handled the situation. She didn’t cheat. She’s carrying my child. I was so mean to her. She’s overseas with her family at the moment they’re telling her to leave me. I don’t blame them for saying that. But, I’m really not suited to be a father.

She’s going to keep the baby . There’s nothing I can do about that. But my issue is I’m going to lose her as well. I don’t really know what I’m asking. I guess I just wanted to tell somebody what I’m going through. I’ve thought about “stepping up” but, I truly can’t. I spoke to her about it. She told me that I don’t have to worry about her or being a father. She’s moving after the delivery. She won’t come after me for money or anything else. She says we’ll both get to start over.

She’s a beautiful young woman… she’ll have men lining up to be a step dad. That idea pains me. While I don’t want the kid, I don’t want him/her being raised by another man. I definitely don’t want her with another man either. And most of all, I’m scared I’m going to change my mind later on. I don’t want to promise her that I’ll be there and then ultimately being a “deadbeat.” I need more time to think but, she’s not going to give several months. I’m so torn. I can’t lose her. Especially not like this.

Update: i probably should have put this in there. My vasectomy failed. I’m not sure how long ago it happened but it failed. She was on birth control through out our relationship and stopped last year . I can’t be 100% sure if it’s my child until after it’s born but we did a prenatal paternity test and the odds are pretty high that I’m the father.

My boyfriend finishes in less than a minute.

I’m not kidding lol. I(f20) have been dating my boyfriend(m21) for a couple months now and it’s the most healthy relationship I’ve ever had, but our only issue is our bedroom activity.

When we do it, it’s really good but I’m often disappointed after because it’s done so quick which at first I thought was kind of cute because it meant he really liked me but after a while it’s becoming an issue.

We do foreplay but I find I have a higher libido than him and I’d love to dirty talk and make it more kinky but I don’t because I’m afraid he will just finish lol.

We usually only get intimate once a day which I normally wouldn’t mind but when it’s all over in under 5 minutes I’m a bit upset because I’m also someone who struggles to come and I find myself internally getting frustrated because I love him and don’t wanna make him feel bad for something he can’t control.

We have somewhat talked about it and he said he tries to think of other things to stop him but obviously it isn’t working lol.

I try to initiate more with him but he usually won’t do it with me again for the day if we already did and I don’t want to overstep his boundaries because he isn’t an overly into it and mainly enjoys quality time together which I love but I’d just like to at least get close to finishing with him.

Does anyone have anyyy advice on lasting longer/what i should do differently?

My (27F) boyfriend (29M) proposed and it was a disaster.

My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years. He proposed to me in a beautiful but public place.

We wanted to take a picture and he told me to ask a girl nearby to take it for us.

She seemed very annoyed that I asked but begrudgingly stood back to take our photo, and this is when he got down on one knee and proposed.

I was mortified that this stranger was taking photos of this moment, especially one who wasn’t very happy to be doing so.

This distracted me and I just felt so embarrassed in that moment, and then she just handed me back the phone without saying anything or congratulating us.

I did say yes, but later cried when we were in the car because of the situation and how embarrassed I felt at the time.

He asked if he could re-do it, which we did in a more private way, and then I said yes again.

I thought everything turned out okay, but it turns out he was very hurt by my reaction the first time. He even cried about it, and I have rarely seen him cry about anything.

I told him that I was so sorry for my reaction and that it had nothing to do with him, that I was just embarrassed that a stranger who didn’t want to be there was watching our moment and made me feel so anxious.

I just don’t know how to fix it. We love each other so much, but I don’t want this to be our proposal memory forever. What should I do?