I got laid off a month ago and I love being unemployed.

I am 30 years old. I work in a field where I have gotten laid off every year for the past 8 years. But I am also a single mom, so I have chosen to get a part time job every year as well.

This year I was able to save quite a bit of money, and so when I got laid off, I decided I wasn’t going to work anymore and just live off of my savings and unemployment.

BEST DECISION EVER. I forgot how free it felt to not have to go to work everyday. I sleep in as much as I want, and do whatever I want during the day. If I just feel like resting, I rest! I can do whatever hobbies or activities I feel like doing as well. I have not had this much free time in 8 YEARS.

I decided I was going to not return to my job after my layoff ended, and so I found a new job, which I start February 20.

I am excited to start my new job and think I will enjoy it much more than my previous job, but also I am feeling sad that I will have to give up all this free time and go back to the daily grind of working again.

Working full time while also raising a child is so incredibly difficult, exhausting and draining. I am glad I had this break.

The new position I have accepted is a full-time year-round job, so my days of being laid off are over (I hope).

But I hope to find a way to include more rest and relaxation in my life even when I return to working. I didn’t realize how much I missed it.

Is love really conditional?

I am a 28 year old male and my partner is 29 years old. I met her a half a year ago on okc and we really hit off very well initially.

However, she is now really worried about the future and how different we are in terms of everything else although we are compatible personality and character wise. Especially the difference in the financial status.

I work as a supervisor with annual salary of 60k while hers is 120k annual in her own field. My income is pretty much close to the peak already and even if I did manage to go up higher to go corporate I still won’t be able to match up with her current salary. On the other hand, she still has alot of room for growth.

She wants me to be able to match up with her and I too also want to match up with her. She wants to be free from financial woes and retire early. But I have no way to go about doing this. I can’t go studying cause it takes up too much time and I need visible results in months. I cant stay in my job because it’s a dead end. What else can I do? I have already considered insurance, property, investments, mlm, opening my own business. Maybe even need sell my butt alr like this. I am definitely not lazy but i don’t want to waste my full efforts into something that will not provide me the means to shape her desired future with her.

It’s as though fate brought us together but fate also wants to show me that no matter what I try or do my fate is sealed and she wil leave me because I cant play my part to contribute to our future together. I don’t know what to do next. Is this the end?

Here are what netizens think:

• Bring her to MBS hotel room staycation get her drunk n piak while still able to liao before she run away…

• Joining insurance agents is the only way, few years later confirm very wealthy if work hard enough to sell more lampah cancer life insurance…

• She’s not the one. Move on. Let her go find her 120k per annum guy. You won’t be happy together in the long run. The right one will work together with you for a better future, not set demands and expectations that is out of your reach.

• My wife earns 3x what I do. Once you have kids and it makes sense that you, rather than your wife, is the primary childcare provider, she won’t care that you make less. Tell her this is the 21st century and to grow up.

Overseas Singaporean?

Saw a post about moving to Australia, thought I would give my two cents. I’m an Australian PR and I’ve spent almost half my life in Australia

Before migrating to Australia, I would constantly complain about everything. Like every typical Singaporean, everything in Singapore isn’t good enough, that the government isn’t doing enough. It’s only after I moved out of Singapore that I realised how wrong I was. We’re so privileged to be Singaporeans and we don’t even recognise that. Yes, Singapore isn’t perfect and there’s things we can and need to improve. There’s no such place as a perfect country, but if I had to choose one place to call home, it’ll always be Singapore

I’m not going to diss Australia or any other country, but I just want to say this. Whenever people ask me if I would convert to be Australian, my answer is always and will always be no. This is home, truly

Also, please be mindful of your choice of words, it’s a reflection of your education iykyk

Here are what netizens think:

• You are probably right , others are also probably right . The view n experience is different when you are looking from the top 5% vs bottom 5% SES of Spore. Everyone’s situation differs . I support that ITE fella’s opinion. He found what works best for him . Of course if you are part of the L family I suggest don’t migrate haa . Life is beautiful where you make it work and where you know you will thrive . The grass isn’t greener on the other side but there are some environmental factors n second chances or alternative pathways for some people . It’s true that certain places value certain skills more than others . It’s not that one country is better than the other but more of which one can you live in and be the best version of yourself . Optimisation ya.

• Haiyo, it’s the same as in SG. PR come to SG to work and live but China, India, Philiphines, Malaysia etc is their home truly.

• At the end of the day, personal preference for this or that is personal preference. Safety, culture, convenience, etc. But I will go with 1 very simple metric.

• Strange that despite your “loyalty” to SG, u r still clinging on to your Ozzie PR! Says a lot about your practicability n two-face personality – sucking up on the quality of life in Oz while cannot bear to cut the umbilical cord that can give u some comfort of your past familiarity.

How do I tell her no

How do guys manage a breakup knowing that the girl will turn all crazy?

I have been meaning to tell a girl we are not meant to be but I know her reaction will give me so much stress. I am always in fear that she will act up if anything about our relationship didn’t go her way.

I was not in a mind of commitment 2 years ago and I met this girl, we started out as a open relationship, since we were meeting so much and she needed a place to stay, I allowed her to move into mine.

However, whenever I am out with colleagues for late night drinks (yes, fine, with pretty girls around) or I try to date someone, she would go all crazy when I am back. She will threaten to commit suicide, tell me stories about her committing suicide on her ex-bf, cries the whole day and night. It’s so hard to make her stop except to tell her that I love her.

In recent time, she started asking if I will marry her and I told her no, it’s not what we started out working towards. And yes, her crying and everything occured and she will chill down after awhile and we just keep going through this motion of argument, cries, make up S.

I am not into marriage with her, when I think about it, I have all these concerns that I am not going to put the rest of my life into.

Honestly we are not young anymore, she is in her mid 30s and me in my mid 40s.

How can I let her leave me alone

Here are what netizens think:

• Easy to invite people to your home.. Hard to chase them out.. U must be thinking of free sex and now u end up in this situation…

• U need to show her that you haven’t been using her (even if u have benefited fr free sex on call n housekeeping etc last 2 yrs).

• Show that she’s still respected as a human being- give her a reasonable deadline to move, help with the packing and/or the deposit for the new place, tell her tt u still care about her as a friend. No sex, or u r manipulating her into holding onto the heartstrings. (U would be TA then.) Let her know tt if she can be dignified about this, u guys still have a chance of staying friends, otherwise u will be forced to be very cold about this. Lastly, if u know her friend/family, get her social support network to rally around her during this time. If she has no friends (sometimes tts why they get overly attached n threaten suicide when their only emotional support abandons them), u can suggest counselling for her.

• Give her some notice and give her some compensation for your boat docking into her harbour.

Toilet is my safe place….

Its a bit weird to say that my toilet at home is my safe place but i am not lying and just want to share my thoughts.

When i was young my mom would always say that i should not stay in the toilet for so long because there is a lot of jin and setan there and that i should do my business and get out but as i grow older i just like to stay inside the toilet doing nothing.

For someone who do not have their own room or private space i would always run to the bathroom if i feel in need to escape reality…

yeah weird right? Haha but even when i am outside in public and if i encounter an uncomfortable situation i would go to the bathroom and sit there for hrs. Literally sitting on the toilet seat and do nothing but stare in blank space.

Its a weird habit but i was wondering if anyone is doing the same thing or is it just me?

Here are what netizens think:

• if you find toilet is a safe place then it is..nothing wrong..but I can’t imagine sitting in the public toilet for hours though..why not find another safe place? like staircase, park, ect ect…now they also have those cubicle in shopping for rent , you can consider too.. you are what your mind think.

• The only way for you to break this cycle is to go in after me. Something I wouldn’t wish upon my worst enemy, but if it can help. Why not . Lol

• You like to sit alone, enjoying the solitude. You would like any place similar to toilet that gives you same experience of having your own time away from anything else. Try looking for another place like park, beach and see if you feel the same there.

• Even when I have my own room, I still like to spend a long time in the toilet playing on my phone

First of all, I have my own savings from working through sch, so no parents support other than staying at home, and I do pay my share of bills.

And it is tech related job, I think the market is quite bad now, I have seen many postings, requiring 10 yrs exp for 7k and it is still hard to find truly entry-level jobs, 4k salary job, req 3 years exp and proficiency in many stuff, the job req list and the exp required did scare me off.

I didnt even dare to apply for most of them, esp the jobs that req knowledge on like 5 languages and frameworks I havent even heard of (under ‘required’ and not ‘good to have’), and that was only 4k to 5k job.

1 whole page of what to do, req high proficiency in so many languages and frameworks and software, and the pay not even 4.5k, honestly demoralising.

Normal peasants like me prob get a 2k to 3k job and suck it. (Ya I saw a swe job for 2k lol). The agents I spoke to also told me 3k is the normal starting salary for tech industry, is this true or lowballing me?

It’s fine, not in a hurry, I just rejected the 3k tech job w possible OT til midnight, cos I feel that it is really too much. I’m considering to go back to the customer service job for now (hybrid, pays the same w no OT) while I find other jobs hahaa

Thanksss

Hi everyone! Just a clueless fresh grad from cs here asking for some help and opinions

I have been searching for many entry level jobs, analyst type roles or swe, and most if not all req 2-3 years exp.

Do projects in uni count? But I have nothing to show since I didnt save the codes to github or something….

And I’m finding it difficult to find a job w my existing skillsets, let’s say I only have half of what the job requirements states, should I still apply? Like I only know AngularJS but the job requires me to know another 2 types of JS(idk why??). Ngl The job requirements and exp are turning me away from applying, feels that they will just throw my resume away cos I’m not the candidate they are looking for. I have seen like 5 diff SQL coding req for just 1 job, not sure if they meant they req any 1 or need to know everything.

And some jobs dont state their salary on the job postings, had bad experiences w gg through the interview rounds only to find out they are only paying xxx amt, but it seems inappropriate to ask for the salary during the 1st round of interview? How do you go about it? Or should I skip those that dont talk about salary? It’s either like this or they put a salary range that is like from 3k to 8k, how do I know I’m not lowballing myself?

saw another post and had ptsd about the ‘tight knit’ and ‘good manager’ parts, got taken advantage of to work free OT before and didnt like it one bit, pay was low too.

Thanks, sorry for the long question

Here are what netizens think:

• No, your University project is nothing compared to the real world

• It is better that you stop dreaming and start somewhere, you can always jump later on.

• Any fresh grad from local university thinking that they are big shots now with a degree. Everyone also have just another piece of toilet paper.