My (33f) bf (33m) has been making it seem like he’s this successful business man this whole time. I feel so betrayed

5 years ago I sat myself down and questioned myself on what I truly wanted in a partner. When I came into this relationship I believed in the law of attraction. I actively saved money thinking that when I met my person, I would be ready to start a family. I thought that I would have my shit sorted out and likewise my future partner would too (if not financially then mentally). I did all this because I’m a women whose clock is ticking and I wanted to have alot of kids.

When I met my bf 2 years ago I made it known that I was serious, that I wanted to settle down and have kids. I gave him an idea of what my timeline looks like. He went along with it and told me that he would make it happen and that I didn’t need to worry.

He was spending money like crazy (I would question this and he would get mad and defensive) so I thought that he was just well off.

6 months into our relationship I tried to open the can of worms about finances. My end goal was to buy a house and start a family. When I did this my bf, a business owner, made me think that he had all this money saved up. He told me that he would never disclose how much was in his bank account. When I told him that I wanted a modest lifestyle he told me that he made x amount of money and that he wanted to buy this fancy house. He took me on these fancy vacations. He financed this expensive car etc etc etc.

Because of his lifestyle and him reassuring me that he has everything together, he wanted me to spend like him. When I refused, he made me feel like I wasn’t good enough for him. He called me stingy. He made me feel like I needed to be this certain type of person who was giving and generous in order for him to open up to me about his finances.

Now fast forward 2 years in. I tried to be that person for him. I tried to give more of myself and be more generous (more then I would in a normal relationship). Since then he’s been more open and comfortable about talking about his finances with me.

However I’m now find out that he doesn’t make a much as he said he does. He doesn’t have all this money saved up like he said he did. He can’t afford this fancy house that he’s been constantly talking about.

In the past he told me that he would never disclose how much he has and now I’m finding out that I have more saved up then he does.

After all of this my bf says “just trust me I will do everything in my power to take care of you” which I believe BUT i’ve always been a lady with a plan. I don’t believe blindly. I think that everything can be planned for.

My clock is ticking (to have kids) and I feel extremely deceived. I feel like I could’ve found a partner who actually wanted to build with me.

Instead I found a partner who deceived me and made me feel like I wasn’t good enough this whole time while making me believe that he has all this going on for him. When I tried to be a partner who was good enough I find out that he has little going on for him if anything.

Is this something that can be worked upon? I feel like if I leave everyone will think that I’m this gold digger.

Really I just wanted someone to build with and now I’m questioning if I can do that with this man who I feel deceived me.

Yesterday, I (35f) sent my husband (38m) out to pick up some bread really quick. He came home over 2 hours later. Ask him where he was and he tells me that he had to pick up some things for Christmas for his co-workers and “others.”

The co-workers thing made sense but the wording about “others” was so odd so I’m like what others? He says oh you know, you guys, the family. Now, this man never buys us gifts. Ever. I handle all the Christmas shopping for all the whole family- I buy and wrap my own present every year. I suspend my disbelief and just say okay.

The whole thing seemed more and more like bullshit as I thought about it and it occurred to me that when he came into the house he didn’t bring anything with him- just the groceries.

Whatever he bought must be in his car. Found a chance to sneak out to the car- there is nothing in it but a single bag. It’s hidden pretty well behind his seat. Dolce & Gabbana sunglasses. Check our bank account- $350 purchase.

They are absolutely not for me. I don’t wear sunglasses. I wear prescription glasses (I’m super blind) and it’s just never been convenient to get sunglasses too. Check the model online and I think they’re mens? I can’t think of a single person in his life he’d buy something this extravagant for. I don’t think it’s for his boss or anything like that- he hates his boss and would have bitched about having to buy a gift for him. He would never wear something like that himself.

What do I do? I could ask where the extra (non-existent) gifts for the family are when we unwrap presents tomorrow. But do I really want to start a fight on Christmas?

Millenials, how do you do it? How do you seriously do it?

Graduate, get married, buy a house, and have kids. How can you do it when the economy is in shambles? I sent hundreds of job applications and still haven’t heard from a single company.

I have been unemployed for more than 11 months. Then I doom-scroll social media and see posts of millennials with two or three toddlers, living in nice homes with two cars. How do they do it?

I’m seriously hyperventilating thinking that I’d have to look after myself for the rest of my life

Netizens’ comments

• Us Millennials have seen our fair share of obstacles. We were going into the workforce the same time of the 2008 Financial Crisis when unemployment was in double digits. Finding my first “career” job was a struggle. And when I finally got one, the job sucked the entire time I was there. BUT, it provided me valuable experience to attain a more attractive position in another industry. I now own a home with my wife and 2 young children. I also have a great job.
• We got married, but we can’t afford a house. Or kids. And I got laid off because of my disability. And my husband had to work for years to get his PhD and get a job in his field. So… We don’t. Simple as that. Everything is debt and bleak future and struggles.
  But! Every day I get to wake up with my best friend. And I got several good years being a darn good teacher and meeting wonderful kids and getting to be a part of their lives.
• My advice? Don’t rush it. Go at your own pace and save up a little. Thats what I did and then the rest kind of rolls along with it. Luckily I married my school sweetheart and now we’ve been together for 10 years. It definitely helped that we both worked. We lived with my parents and saved up a bit. If you’re lucky enough to have that opportunity, utilize it.

It was an ordinary Monday morning when the shouting started.

My colleagues and I were huddled around the conference table discussing our latest project when we heard the sound of yelling coming from the boss’s office. We all exchanged uneasy glances, not sure what was going on.

A few minutes later, the door to the office flew open and our boss strode out, his face a deep shade of red. He was shouting obscenities and slammed the door behind him.

We all stared in shock, not sure what to do. We all knew something had just happened, but none of us could have guessed what it was.

The next day, the whole office was abuzz with rumours. Apparently, our boss had found out that his wife had been cheating on him. This had sent him into a rage, and he had taken it out on us.

We all felt terrible for our boss. We knew that his wife’s betrayal had hurt him deeply, and we wanted to do whatever we could to help him through this difficult time. Unfortunately, our boss had taken his anger out on us, and it made the work environment very uncomfortable.

It’s not uncommon for people to act out when they’re in pain. We all want to protect ourselves from being hurt, so it’s natural that someone would lash out in an attempt to avoid feeling the pain of their own situation.

At the same time, it’s important for employers to remember that their employees are not responsible for their personal problems. We can sympathize and show support, but we can’t take the place of a spouse or a therapist.

It’s important for employers to remember that their employees can’t take on the burden of their personal issues.

It was a difficult time for the whole office, but we all tried to remain professional and supportive of our boss. We tried to focus on our work and not get too caught up in the drama. We also made sure to give our boss some space, so he could work through his emotions in private.

It took a few weeks, but eventually, our boss was able to move past his wife’s betrayal and our office returned to normal. The whole experience was a reminder that our personal lives can have an effect on our professional lives, and it’s important for employers to remember that their employees are not responsible for their personal problems.

It was the night before Christmas.

I was so excited to wake up the next day because my extended family were all coming over and it had been a long time since we all got together.

I could not get to sleep thinking about all the fun that will happen the next day.

After a few hours of tossing and turning, I finally fell asleep.

I was awoken by a strange noise coming from downstairs. I could make out my mum’s voice, but I couldn’t make out what she was saying.

I decided to investigate and crept quietly down the stairs.

As I got closer to the living room, I heard a familiar sound of kissing.

I peaked around the corner and to my shock, my mum was in Santa’s lap and they were kissing! I couldn’t believe my eyes.

I quickly ran back up to my room and hid under the covers. I was so confused. What was my mum doing kissing Santa and who exactly is Santa?

Was my Dad dressed in a Santa costume and were they engaging in some weird roleplay?

The following morning, I was still trying to wrap my head around what I had seen. I didn’t know what to do. I was so embarrassed and scared to tell anyone.

My mum eventually noticed my silence and asked me what was wrong. I didn’t want to tell her, but I knew I had to.

I reluctantly told her about seeing her kissing Santa.

She got a shock and pulled me aside and then told me that she had actually been involved with her colleague for some time.

He was drunk and decided to randomly pop up at our place and things eventually got frisky.

I could not believe what I just heard!

How could she betray my Dad like that while he was also in the house?

I advised her to end things off with her colleague but she told me that there is no more love between my Dad and her.

What a Christmas ‘surprise’ that was

Hello everyone.

I feel extremely discouraged from pursuing Asian men.

I tried so many times, be it online dating or introduction through friends, and so far, no Asian guy has ever expressed any romantic interest in me.

I mostly get friendzoned and the only time I got some “romantic” attention from an Asian man, I was just a fling to him and another notch on his bedpost.

I think I have had enough of this and I’m not willing to put my heart on the line again for Asian men.

I genuinely, wholeheartedly tried my best in learning their language, respecting their culture and customs while in Asia.

I was never good enough in their eyes, no matter how hard I tried.

I give up, I genuienly do.

To all of you ladies who have found an Asian boyfriend or husband, my hat goes to you.

To all the single ladies out there, I wish you all the best and hope you find the right guy for you, no matter where he is from.

Happy holidays!

I was always the ‘muscle man’ of the group. Growing up, I was always the biggest, strongest, and most athletic guy in my circle of friends.

My physique was something I was always proud of, and I liked to make sure my friends knew it, too.

So, when I turned 21, I decided it was time to take my bodybuilding to the next level and really show off my biceps. I started hitting the gym harder, eating better, and taking supplements to help me reach my goals. I was sure that this would be the key to attracting the ladies.

But as it turns out, I was wrong.

Sure, I had the biceps and the abs to show off, but when it came to the ‘downstairs’ department, I was lacking. I always felt insecure about my size and always thought that if I could just be a bit bigger, then I would get the girls.

But no matter how hard I tried, I just couldn’t seem to make any progress. No matter how much I worked out, my size stayed the same. I was frustrated and embarrassed and felt like I had failed in my attempt to attract the ladies.

I soon realized that my size didn’t really matter when it came to attracting the ladies because by the time we reach the bed room its too late for her anyway.

What really mattered was my confidence. I started to focus more on my personality, my sense of humor, and my intelligence. I started to be more open and honest with the ladies and let them know that I was comfortable with who I was, regardless of size.

This approach worked much better than showing off my biceps ever did. I was able to make real connections with the ladies, and I was able to build a level of trust and respect with them. I finally felt comfortable in my own skin and was able to attract the ladies in a much more genuine and meaningful way.

So, if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that size doesn’t matter when it comes to attraction. It’s all about confidence, personality, and being comfortable in your own skin. Showing off your biceps may get you some attention, but it won’t get you the kind of attention you really want.

So, if you’re feeling insecure about your size, just remember that it doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of things. Focus on being comfortable in your own skin and showing off the best version of yourself, and you’ll soon find that the ladies will be flocking to you.