Are there actually people who don’t cheat?

Like seriously, anybody? I have never cheated or been cheated on (that I am aware of) but my timelines everywhere are flooded with cheating, cheating, cheating….

Makes me want to stay single forever 🤔

I ponder how likely is it that someone who has been cheated on multiple times will do it to someone else?

Edited to add: I now realize I need some different forums in my life. But I needed this reassurance.

I watched my “dad” openly cheat on my mom for 13 years and watched how it destroyed her and how weak of a person she was.

I just don’t want to bring the trauma and insecurities into my next relationship but it can be hard when it appears that many people cheat and disregard the simple act of just breaking up with someone.

Netizens’ comments

• There are plenty of people who don’t cheat. But people don’t tend to talk about that a lot so it makes sense that you’d feel like you hear about cheating more often.
• I’ve been married for 16 years no cheating. We started dating when I was 15 (mid 40’s now) for just over 5 years. We broke up for a few then found each other again and married after another year of dating and about a year engagement. Never cheated.
• I’ve never cheated or been cheated on, and I don’t know anyone who has cheated or been cheated on. Definitely depends on your circles I think.
• Yes I would never cheat. Occasionally I have nightmares of cheating on my boyfriend and I wake up terrified. I love him more than anyone, I could never do anything to harm him. Plus I’m so lucky anyone else but him would be a downgrade.

I hate being old.

I’m a 29 year old woman. I remember being 14/15 and the difference is like night and day. I’d always get straight A’s and I’d be able to understand something very quickly, much quicker than everyone else in my class. I also seemed to be able to move much more quickly.

Fast forward now, no exaggeration, half the time I don’t know what the day or date is, making a cup of tea seems to use 100% of my brainpower when before it’d only use 2%. I enjoy watching shows but I’m constantly forgetting the names of the characters or getting confused by the plot so much that I don’t know what’s going on. Actually, that applies to real life. Most of the time I don’t know what’s going on. A lot of the time, people have to repeat sentences because I’ll forget what someone says mid-sentence.

I’m sleeping up to 20 hours a day and when I wake up, I don’t feel much better than I did before I went to sleep. I don’t even feel like doing art like I used to, because it seems to use far too much energy and brainpower now. When I move, it feels like I’m moving in slow motion. This isn’t just me noticing this – other people have noticed how it looks like I’m moving in slow motion.

Also, constantly forgetting things. There’s also this weird 5-10 second delay between me thinking of doing something and then actually doing it, a delay which definitely was not there when I was 14/15.

I hate being old.

I’ve been catfishing a guy and have fallen for my victim.

He is asking to meet a few days from now and I don’t know what to do. We both found ourselves very attached to each other and we can’t stop texting.

I even send videos to him without my face. I might actually think I’m catching feelings for him. I even created a burner Telegram and a burner Instagram just in case.

I was also thinking of just disabling my Grindr for good. But I don’t wanna ghost him because he’ll be heartbroken and I’ll be guilty af.

This ain’t gonna end well.

Here are what netizens think:

• Meet him and play coconut tree la. Maybe sparks fly the moment your eyes meet? Either that or shoes. Hee hee.

• Time to come clean with him. Honestly if he cannot see past the face and appreciate you for who you are, no point. But deeply apologize and be ready for whatever comes your way. Let us know if your first date is make up 

• The most common cooking method is deep-frying, but catfish can be grilled, baked and pan-fried with great success. Catfish has a mild, sweet flavor and is less flaky and denser than other whitefish, allowing for a variety of cooking choices.

• I know no one will read this but sometimes, whenever I eat M&Ms, I like to hold two m&m’s in between my fingers and squeeze as hard as I can until one m&m cracks. I eat the cracked one, and the one that didn’t crack becomes the champion. Then I grab the other m&m, and force it to compete with the champion in this deadly game of m&m gladiators. I do this until I run out of m&m’s, and when there is only one m&m left standing, I send a letter to m&m’s with the champion m&m in it with a note attached that reads: “Please use this m&m for breeding purposes.” The thing is, do they have a female m&m?

• Wanna play this game, you must set a line that you wont cross. Yet you failed miserably. This game is not for you.

how do i stop having feelings on someone that is not for me?

i have a guy friend. i strongly believed that he is the type that i will never like. totally like a bro. some serious mismatches in values, religion, language, family background etc. retrospectively, maybe i did feel something but i have been suppressing the feeling because i don’t think it is possible.

lately there is a girl pursuing my friend. eventually he will like her, if he hasn’t already, because she is really sweet- the type that guys like. i feel more and more irritated whenever i see any kind of interaction between them. i know i know, who am i to feel anything? i should be happy if my friend finds a girl that loves him. as much as i try to i just don’t feel any happiness.

i will not jeopardise their relationship in any way. i just hope to reduce my own suffering. hoping for advice from everyone.

Here are what netizens think:

• I may be wrong but you seems like a possesive person. Logically understanding you are not in the position to feel the way but have fear losing something you “own” in some way once he has a new relationship. Instead of focusing on the feeling, divert to cultivate a better version of self to feel happy for others.

• Not being true to your own feelings, why regret now when you see someone else potentially getting together with him.

• There is this words BMW best man win. So same apply.. No harm trying if you feel he is not the 2 timing type.

• My opinion is the guy will pay more attention to her instead of you, u dont like him but u feel insecure cause he will put more time on her instead of u

Boys will complain about they’re lonely but will only talk to girls they think are pretty.

I admit that guys do have it worse than girls in the sense that they get less attention from society, but the only people who give other girls attention are dudes themselves,

and instead of talking to each other they only talk to girls they think are pretty but then complain ?

Make it make sense plz

Netizens’ comments

• I don’t know about others but I (17m) talk to girls who talk to me. I have no idea about how to start a conversation, carry a conversation or end a conversation, nor any proficiency doing so.
  But I would be happy to talk to girls who don’t consider themselves pretty if I have become comfortable around them.
• Because girls respond the same whether they are conventionally attractive or not. Why waste my time potentially being rejected by someone I’m not that attracted to?
  That’s like entering a contest with a prize I don’t even want.
  Also, girls compliment each other all the time, it’s literally what female friendships are famous for. What do you mean, “the only people who give other girls attention are dudes”?

Backstabbed throughout my career

I want to ask if it’s common for working adults to keep meeting backstabbers aka xiao ren repeatedly at different jobs?

I’m a mid 30s FTWM in a sales role who does not have the aspiration to become a manager, I prefer to be an individual contributor. My goal is to meet my sales target and find job satisfaction in having clients value my service and having a bonded relationship with colleagues. I try to maintain low profile and do my due diligence and do my best.

After work I don’t really enjoy socialising and prefer to focus on my kids. However, throughout my career I always meet people who just want to backstab me even when I’m have not done anything to them and I’m not even consider in their league.

Not sure why they view me as a competitor and see the need to backstab me?? This happened again to me today and I’m feeling terrible. Again I’m embroiled into some drama which might cause a negative perception from my management even when I didn’t want to fight with anyone for anything! I have been told that I’m too trusting, tell people too many things.

I tend to 掏心掏肺 when I feel someone seems sincere and very keen to make friends with me and thus they got the opportunity to use my words against me. Why can’t people just be kind and don’t do harm to others?

Anyway I just want to know if it’s common to keep meeting 小人 aka backstabbers or is it my 命 aka life?

Here are what netizens think:

• They are your colleagues and competitor. Never your friend sadly. No point building personal relationship. Sometimes if could be something that is not offensive to you, but people are offended. (Speaking from experience). Sometimes misinterpretation and miscommunication. Ultimately, can only talk less, no negative. And to err is human. All have sin, all are fallable. So that’s life.

• In office being friendly doesn’t mean you need to 掏心掏肺 to talk/share everything under the sun. Remember they are just colleagues not BFF. Be a smart working adult, never talk behind any colleague back, don’t kaypoh about colleague problem and never bring any family matter to office. There are always general things to talk like which hawker/food court has better Nasi lemak or NTUC/Giant/Sheng Siong got better offer. Colleague can’t backstab you with this kind of general topic.

• The world is a cruel one esp in SG. Your colleagues are not your friends unless you alr know them since sch or smth… don’t need to open your closet and share your secrets to them

• Working world is a politic scene. Dirt that covered with management jargons.

I had someone show interest in me for the first time at 45.

If I didn’t know better, I’d think this makes my food taste even better.

I never had a girlfriend. Tried online dating and going out of my comfort zone to meet new people. I read a few books on the subject. I followed the usual advice you can find online and elsewhere, but it didn’t work out. I struggle to find my place among people, feel like I’m still the same weirdo I was at 18.

After several years I cut my losses and admitted some things are not meant to be. Some folks don’t become rockstars, and I wouldn’t know intimacy and love. Didn’t make the loneliness easier to bear, but it did lift a weight from my shoulders to admit I wouldn’t amount to much in love, that I’m too late to the party to make up for the lost time. I forced myself not to lust after women, not to fantasize about relationships and make peace with an entire life spent alone. Seems drastic, but I needed that for my mind.

I focused on my stuff even more than before, worked on computers, played video games, watched movies and read books, cut down on my social life to accomodate more loner hobbies.

Come today and I invited a lady friend over for dinner, I like to cook and do that every now and then, friends make good guinea pigs for new recipes. Just kidding, I don’t have a very refined palate and need other opinions than mine to polish my dishes the proper way.

We ate and discussed, during that she told me she wanted to invite me over to her place for dinner, this time as a real date. I asked why, she said she thought she was attracted to me. It’s one of the weirdest things I was ever told, it sounded almost alien.

I let her down gently, I wasn’t interested in her and am not looking to start with dating and relationships at 45.

But being told someone was into me made the food taste differently. I’m still high from the sensation, it’s pretty great. I’m not much, so I take the small successes where I can. It’s been a good day.

I NEED ADVICE

i shower with my bf every day. ususally i close my eyes while washing my hair and keep my eyes closed so the soap doesnt get in my eyes.

howeever today for some reason i opened them and saw my bf was peeing on my leg???? and i got mad and he admitted hes been doing this every day while my eyes are closed

i have no idea what to think or do. we’ve been showering together every morning for 9 years what should i do,??????????

edit: i talked to him like you said and he said he was doing it as secret revenge because of the time i put period blood in his morning coffee because i saw a tiktok about how its a love spell.

i suppose we are even now :

Netizens’ comments

• Those two psychopaths deserve each other
• 1) putting blood in your partners food is not a secret love spell. It is voodoo magic and it is not for trifling
  2) you ain’t got enough back if you ask me
• A friend legit dated a dangerously insane individual who would often use her menstrual blood in witchy shit, the lines are too blurred, dawg.

The society is becoming a very stressful place to live in.

Singapore needs to chill more, be less competitive, be less comparative. Our mental well-being, happiness and health are so much important than wealth, people.

The stress induced by the corporation rat race/salary / housing / cars is all not that important.

People say that change is the only constant, but they are wrong, everything in life changes, but there’s one constant, which is “death”. It is not worth giving your 100% into your work or studies after which someone suffer a burnt out or depression, just your 75% will do.

Give your quality time to those who matter, they will be the ones who remember when you are gone, not the corporation you worked at, your school, your car, your house or your bank account.

If it’s needed, quit your job, quit your school, don’t be afraid to try again, because those who matter don’t mind and those who mind don’t matter, they will always be around to support your decision because they know who you really are.

Remember to take a break!

Have a tea or coffee and have a chat with someone that matters, check out how they are doing and tell them hope they are doing well!

Here are what netizens think:

• Stress is inevitable. More importantly, is how u deal with it and become stronger. Avoiding your problems is probably the last resort

• This place is ok. Nothing stressful. It’s how you lived the ‘life’ to invalidate the ‘stress’ illustrated by toxic people around you.

• If there’s opportunity to travel to emerging markets, like China and Vietnam, and experience/witness the hunger of these people, we may find that in next 10-15 yrs, they will surpass us in almost everything we know of SG today. By the time we realised, we becoming an emerging economy then, and may find we are so laggy behind… US and Europe are already feeling it.. we’ll be the next ‘mountain tortoise’

• Huh? Maybe you can live that way because you come from a rich family, or you can access government support due to your academic performance. I think it is not stressful enough! Boring. Yawn

My teenage daughter is a huge disappointment, has been from birth, I’ve just lost more hope now. I don’t like most of the things about her. If I could go back in time and not have her, I 100% would.

My oldest child, now 14, was born with an “irritability diagnosis”, which is a nice way of saying she has a deeply horrible personality.

She hit milestones early, so I always thought she was smart. We started therapy and medications for her early. I’ve always held out hope that she’ll get better because, well, you have to as a parent, and because you don’t know what will happen as they develop.

There have been times where I have genuinely liked spending time with her, times that I’ve loved being her parent, proud, grateful, all of that.

But. And these are the teenage years, so I haven’t totally given up hope. But. I just can’t stand her. When she’s not being verbally rude or stealing from us, she just vomits the most vapid shit.

It’s like she somehow became incredibly stupid. She’s made TikTok into her personality. She doesn’t read or do any school work. She’s mean and selfish. She’s also gross; doesn’t bathe and leaves pads and tampons all over her room.

I’ve been in therapy for a couple of years for two reasons. One is that I want to not feel this way. I want to like her. The other is that I feel like I can’t support her like I should and want to if I feel this way. I spend time with her and model all the things you learn in therapy.

I listen and try to be fair. She’s not who I want as a kid. I wouldn’t mind a “stupid” kid, as long as they were kind. I look at people who have neurotypical kids…I’m so jealous. I cry at church when I see other people’s ‘normal’ kids. I’m so angry and sad. I just hope she can keep a job when she turns 18, so I never have to live with her again.