I NEED ADVICE

i shower with my bf every day. ususally i close my eyes while washing my hair and keep my eyes closed so the soap doesnt get in my eyes.

howeever today for some reason i opened them and saw my bf was peeing on my leg???? and i got mad and he admitted hes been doing this every day while my eyes are closed

i have no idea what to think or do. we’ve been showering together every morning for 9 years what should i do,??????????

edit: i talked to him like you said and he said he was doing it as secret revenge because of the time i put period blood in his morning coffee because i saw a tiktok about how its a love spell.

i suppose we are even now :

Netizens’ comments

• Those two psychopaths deserve each other
• 1) putting blood in your partners food is not a secret love spell. It is voodoo magic and it is not for trifling
  2) you ain’t got enough back if you ask me
• A friend legit dated a dangerously insane individual who would often use her menstrual blood in witchy shit, the lines are too blurred, dawg.

The society is becoming a very stressful place to live in.

Singapore needs to chill more, be less competitive, be less comparative. Our mental well-being, happiness and health are so much important than wealth, people.

The stress induced by the corporation rat race/salary / housing / cars is all not that important.

People say that change is the only constant, but they are wrong, everything in life changes, but there’s one constant, which is “death”. It is not worth giving your 100% into your work or studies after which someone suffer a burnt out or depression, just your 75% will do.

Give your quality time to those who matter, they will be the ones who remember when you are gone, not the corporation you worked at, your school, your car, your house or your bank account.

If it’s needed, quit your job, quit your school, don’t be afraid to try again, because those who matter don’t mind and those who mind don’t matter, they will always be around to support your decision because they know who you really are.

Remember to take a break!

Have a tea or coffee and have a chat with someone that matters, check out how they are doing and tell them hope they are doing well!

Here are what netizens think:

• Stress is inevitable. More importantly, is how u deal with it and become stronger. Avoiding your problems is probably the last resort

• This place is ok. Nothing stressful. It’s how you lived the ‘life’ to invalidate the ‘stress’ illustrated by toxic people around you.

• If there’s opportunity to travel to emerging markets, like China and Vietnam, and experience/witness the hunger of these people, we may find that in next 10-15 yrs, they will surpass us in almost everything we know of SG today. By the time we realised, we becoming an emerging economy then, and may find we are so laggy behind… US and Europe are already feeling it.. we’ll be the next ‘mountain tortoise’

• Huh? Maybe you can live that way because you come from a rich family, or you can access government support due to your academic performance. I think it is not stressful enough! Boring. Yawn

My teenage daughter is a huge disappointment, has been from birth, I’ve just lost more hope now. I don’t like most of the things about her. If I could go back in time and not have her, I 100% would.

My oldest child, now 14, was born with an “irritability diagnosis”, which is a nice way of saying she has a deeply horrible personality.

She hit milestones early, so I always thought she was smart. We started therapy and medications for her early. I’ve always held out hope that she’ll get better because, well, you have to as a parent, and because you don’t know what will happen as they develop.

There have been times where I have genuinely liked spending time with her, times that I’ve loved being her parent, proud, grateful, all of that.

But. And these are the teenage years, so I haven’t totally given up hope. But. I just can’t stand her. When she’s not being verbally rude or stealing from us, she just vomits the most vapid shit.

It’s like she somehow became incredibly stupid. She’s made TikTok into her personality. She doesn’t read or do any school work. She’s mean and selfish. She’s also gross; doesn’t bathe and leaves pads and tampons all over her room.

I’ve been in therapy for a couple of years for two reasons. One is that I want to not feel this way. I want to like her. The other is that I feel like I can’t support her like I should and want to if I feel this way. I spend time with her and model all the things you learn in therapy.

I listen and try to be fair. She’s not who I want as a kid. I wouldn’t mind a “stupid” kid, as long as they were kind. I look at people who have neurotypical kids…I’m so jealous. I cry at church when I see other people’s ‘normal’ kids. I’m so angry and sad. I just hope she can keep a job when she turns 18, so I never have to live with her again.

I’ve been renting a small room from a man, he owns four neighbouring apartments.

Please do not move in with your MIL. I was one of the fools who thought that staying with MIL will be great while waiting for our BTO. My MIL is also a single mother living alone. She did not treat me super well or anything before I stayed with her, but it was cordial. I was excited to move in though. I even paid for some of the renovations she did to her home before i moved in. but once i got married & moved in, she is a different person.

For example:

1) i cannot keep any items in the fridge for myself (like bbt) even when the fridge is pretty empty. only my husband can.

2) i bought a toaster and kettle cause she doesn’t have any, but im not allowed to keep it in the kitchen although the kitchen counter and cabinets are empty

3) suddenly i was expected to provide or cook meals for her although i am the one working and going to office. This was not discussed beforehand.

4) she black face and ignore me when i talk to her, i am like invisible. She only talks to my husband.

5) she locked us out of the house whenever we went out. then we need to keep coaxing her to let us go back in.

6) she kept telling my husband (doesnt speak to me remember?) that i should not bring so much stuff to the house (only brought my clothes, skincare and I kept it in our designated room).

Many other things happened too. I cried everyday when i stayed there. My anxiety and depression worsened and suddenly i was on my anxiety medication again. My husband luckily understood me and we moved out less than a week later (yes all of that happened within a few days).

We are definitely happier now, but this experience did damage mine and husband’s relationship especially since we just got married.

4 years later till today i am not able to forgive my MIL although i am trying to for my own sake… (also cause she still treats me like i am invisible today.)

Ok advice/rant over.

My mum is living her ambitions through me and its suffocating.

I’m a top student with a narcissistic mother. My mother married my dad when she was 20 and never had to work her entire life. She dropped out of school mid way after she met my dad who’s much older and was married to him within a year and had me. My father is the one with the brains. He was the top student during his youth.

Even though my mother never worked her whole life, she didn’t take care of me when I was young. I was sent to my grandparents home during the weekdays and I only went home during weekends till I started school. Even though I did well in my studies, I was forced to take tuition for every subject. My dad initially objected but caved in after my mum persisted. As time grew, I didn’t mind as it’s a good reason to be away from home and away from my mum.

My mother is constantly bragging about my achievements to anyone who is willing to hear and its embarrassing. Even though I’m a top student, we come from a humble background and I lived in the same place since the day I was born. It’s hard enough to be looked down by the other rich students even though I’m doing better in terms of grades. My mother would embarrass me by trying to talk about me to people who didn’t even ask about me. Like my cousin is only in P1 so we have a huge age gap, she would brag about how I was when I was P1 and I’m already past 20. I don’t remember what achievement awards that I’ve collected over the years but she can name them out as though people cared. She is constantly making excuses to why she can’t work because of me. As a result of her obnoxious behavior, we are not close to relatives. I am also not close to my cousins as my mum constantly reminded me that they are average students and I should only mix with people who are similar like me. I admit I feel superior to them as I’m a single child and have more attention and money spent on me compared to my less privileged cousins who had to settle for diplomas.

I can’t be friends with people she don’t approve of. I am not allowed to date. She knows nothing about the courses I’m doing and would always try to lecture me when she knows nothing. I’m not allowed to dress what I like. I’m not allowed a lot of things. She checks my phone whenever she likes and reads my texts. When I’m relaxing she would make snide comments if she think I’ve rested for too long. I’ve given up having a social life because she will follow me wherever I go. As a housewife she has no friends and doesn’t even cook. My father and I are the ones doing the household chores most of the time. I really wish she find a part time job or meet a friend and get off my back.

I’m studying for my degree now and she would talk about her expectations of my future salary and how much she is going to get from me for all the sacrifices she “made” for me. Internally, I really hated the thought of taking over the role of my father to take care of her. She play games on her phone all the time. For a self disciplined person, I really dislike how she’s wasting her time too.

I appreciate my father more than my mother because he was the one who did all the financial planning for my studies while my mum was only interested in when is her next holiday and when is her next branded bag coming in. I have no plans to enable my mother next time. I can’t wait to graduate, move out and start my own life. Am I being unfilial?

I’ve been together with my partner for 1.5 years and do think that he is someone I would like to live my life with. Personally I believe that everyone is imperfect in some way, and that all relationships has its ups and downs in its lifetime. I’ve always been attracted to “drive”, to have someone not just to grow old together, but to “grow” together.

To start the story, my relationship with my boyfriend is not a traditional one and it comes with an imbalance of financials. I (female) am currently drawing a salary of more than 2x that of my partner (male).

In all honesty, I do think money can be earned and is not a representative of a person’s ability. I am also more of a “earn more and save more” person whilst he is a “spend within your means” person. Both of which are equally correct.

There are many parts of my partner that I admire, the fact that he treats the less fortunate well (is nice towards cleaners, elderly), a natural “people person” and also a smart guy, in both EQ and IQ. He treats me well, dotes on me and looks after me.

Over our period of dating, my partner has been relatively resistant to the growth mindset, happy with the status quo and has constantly voiced that he is happy being a supportive partner & a house husband.

I have always believed that people shouldn’t be forced to do what they do not want to do, and have come to terms that my partner has no plans to hustle at work (or out). A part of me sees it as such a huge waste of his amazing potential but it’s fine – I don’t want to see him unhappy.

With that being said, I do think it is right for me to keep him to his word of being a “supportive partner”.

Till today, he has refused to meet 90% of my close friends even though I had mentioned that it would mean a lot to me (the relationships are extremely important to me and my career). FYI – we have already met each others family and his close friends. Because of this, I often feel sad not having the support I really need.

He also constantly makes it a point for me to feel small. He would nitpick on my mistakes, making sure I paid for it by doing the same thing against me in days/months/years later just to proof a point that I was wrong.

Oftentimes, he would see me as a villain in the relationship. In one instance, he accused me of trapping him into applying for a BTO for the sake of me wanting to own a home when it was really for his sake (income ceiling issues) Like bruv, I can buy my own house.

I’d like to emphasise here that he really does treat me well and makes me happy. He takes care of me, cooks for me and takes long walks with me. But like I said, it’s not always sunshine and rainbows (no relationship is). Trying to think positive here.

I think my partner acts the way he does because of financial inferiority but i do hope he knows that I see him as an equal.

Not asking for advice to stay/ break-up, I’ve already decided that I would like for this to be a lifelong relationship.

Just wondering if there’s anyone out there with a similar experience, happily married and can provide some words of encouragement that I can keep for life .