I (27M) started dating my co worker(24F) because I thought she was single

Long story short,

She did not break up with her current boyfriend cleanly and I found out about it after she repeatedly lied to me, we even slept together before.

She has tried to assure me that she was totally over him, she is just a non confrontational person so she doesn’t know to to end things properly.

Now she is going on a overseas trip planned long ago with him and is asking me to wait for her to settle her things.

I told her that going on the trip was a deal breaker, she decided to lie to me that she was going with her friend instead. End of the day she still decided to go on that trip supposedly to end things.

The main problem here is that I fell so deeply for her, I won’t know how to act when she’s back and seeing her daily in the office.

how long to stay in the social work organisation

I recently became a staff in an SSO few months ago. The demographic of the clients that we work with are very challenging. Most of the time I go home feeling dejected and wanting to quit.

Recently my boss spoke to me about whats next for me in my job and he went on to talk about career progression. He advise me to stay for at least 3-5 years in the company before leaving.

i read that certain companies would judge a person for being stagnant if they stay too long at their workplace as ot does not reflect the desire to grow. i was told that however in the social service industry it would be better to stay for 5-7 years before leaving for another organisation as they see it as experience and it is rare for them to hire someone with only 1-2 year experience.

does anyone in the corporate and social service industry advice on this

Here are what netizens think:

• Your boss’s logic seems to be that the reward for eating a lot of char Kway Teow is more char Kway Teow in the future, even if you don’t like CKT. I believe the length of job stint doesn’t matter, it’s more about explaining to future employers why you stayed or left.
• Social work is vitally important to Singapore, thank you for doing it. But don’t pay with your health
• Working in a stress and unhappy work environment will cause tremendous health stress
• Prioritise your well-being. Only you know what’s best for yourself
• Stay for the five and start displaying forms of psychopathy in order to survive your job. It’s emotionally draining but really that’s about it.

My neighbours are maid abusers

My neighbours are maid abusers. Their first maid jumped down the rubbish chute (she survived) to escape, the second starved.

I only found out from my mom today – both maids have escaped to their own country and, as far as I know, the neighbours don’t have a maid at the moment. I’m praying they’re banned for life.

I actually always hated them because they kick our items (we have a small sofa outside the house) or use it as a footstool for wearing their shoes, while throwing their items everywhere.

I wish I could put chilli in their shoes or a cockroach under their door. I hate them so much. What stops me is that they will likely never move and I don’t want my parents (who also don’t plan to move) to be involved in years of conflict with them…

They apparently have grandchildren. I secretly hope their grandchildren die or are disabled, and they go bankrupt.

I hate them. It’s hard to know what to do with these feelings. I just live on.

Here are what netizens think:

• Wah you loath one neighbor become curse entire kampong like that. When you are feeling moments of intense anger, direct your energy into doing other things. Like cleaning up the house, helping your folks with whatever they need, go for a short run downstairs. Just don’t do anything towards them that you will regret later. You may feel satisfied for a short moment but the long term consequences is not worth it.

• Seriously, just out cockcroach in their shoes. Place a bagua opposite their house. Do all the things that irritate them but don’t be too obvious, let them believe evil spirits are haunting them. Make them consider moving out

• Pls dont wish it on their grandchildren. Dont go to their level

I met my Thai gf at a disco and we have been dating for over 6 months, but she is a very paranoid person who always overthinks and thinks that I am cheating on her.

Like she will ask who I’m texting when I’m chatting with my friends, and when I’m laughing or smiling she will ask is it because I’m thinking of another woman.

She is also really wild in bed, and after the first few times of us sleeping together, she told me she didn’t want me to wear protection in bed.

So one night we were drinking at a pub and got drunk, and she is always in the mood whenever she’s drunk and becomes really touchy.

So we got a hotel room and we were getting it on in bed without protection, and whenever I’m about to “come”, i always moan and let her know that I’m about to burst.

That night, just as I was about to burst and pull out, she wrapped her legs around me like how those UFC fighters “lock” their opponents in the ring.

I was fighting to break free but couldn’t and eventually finished inside her, as she laughed and giggled.

After we showered and cleaned ourselves up, I confronted her and she said that she did it so that I wouldn’t leave her for another woman.

This is really making me reevaluate our relationship, and I’m really scared she will get pregnant. I’m not ready to be a father yet, I’m only 24 and still have many things i want to do before starting a family…

Recently I (M26) job hopped to a new company & industry where the pay is relatively much higher than my previous job. However 1 week in, i realise that their work culture is: staying back == work hard.

I’m the type of employee that gets things done. So when i finish work for the day, i expect i can go back on time (working hours 9-6). On top of that I come in early everyday so far. I’m the only person who comes in before 9( usually 8.30-8.45). So you would understand why i would want to go back by 6.10/6.15pm.

They’ve tried to keep it low key ( teasing how I always go back early) and I’ve heard a few chatters behind my back but i brushed it off).

The thing is, just the other day a colleague (M27) who has been in the company for close to 4 years, pulled me aside telling me “I’m not telling you what to do but when I started out, I waited for the seniors to go back before I went back”.

This really puts me off and I don’t understand the point of me staying back If i don’t have work to get done. Its entirely different if some urgent work is unfinished which I wouldn’t mind taking some time to complete.

But this is such a waste of my time as I have other better things to do.

I’m very frustrated with the situation, any tips/ input on how i should go about this would be appreciated.

Additional Info: after the senior told me his story I’ve been staying back for an additional 10 mins, but I’m still the earliest to go back so I expect the same talk/ dissatisfied colleagues to talk behind my back.