Friend is a single mom with no job and won’t stop spending.

I have a friend (25) who’s a single parent. She had her child at 17 and as you can imagine, has struggled her way through a lot of her life (beyond her child as well). She’s currently paying her bills thanks to her grandpa.

She is messaging me just about every day to tell me of the things she’s bought, or wants to buy. Anything from makeup to getting a hotel to meet up with and hook up with a guy (add on the cost of childcare to that type of bill).

I don’t need to go into all the details, her priorities are completely out of whack. Whenever I try to tell her this she always tells me to just be a friend, or that her priorities are in order since her bills are paid and her child in fed.

I can’t tell her that paying your bills on someone else’s money isn’t exactly doing well for yourself. A breaking point for me was she was over for an evening with her son and she asked if he could have a frozen food from my freezer because she didn’t have the money to order food as she had offered.

Which I had offered my fridge to begin with so that itself isn’t the issue, the issue is literally the next morning she texted me to show me a $70 Sephora order she placed..

Am I just to sit back and let her make her own choices? It kills me watching her be so stupid.

My life is meaningless. I am so depressed.

My monthly salary balance after loan deduction is negative.

Been doing full time + part-time jobs but still insufficient to cover the loan. I am making 4600 per month, but my loans are 6500 (cc and personal loans). Worse, my parents are sick and I am unable to provide for my their medicine.

The worst feeling you can have as a man. My wife is covering all the household expenses right now. About the time I will be fcked up big time and that’s the end for me.

Here are what netizens think:

• Some loans are not dischargeable in bankruptcy. I believe student loans are in this category, but it may differ based on lender. A bankruptcy would adversely affect the spouse too, who apparently is in better shape.
• What loans are being deducted from your salary? Perhaps the term on those loans should be renegotiated.
• Have you looked into loan consolidation? Do you have the opportunity to pick up more shifts at your job or pick up a second job/gig work?
• Go try work at Geylang be a duck and settle it once and for all

How to solve cockroach problem in my high rise HDB?

Hello everyone! I stay in a 4 room BTO, high rise, not near rubbish chute. I recently ran into the issue of little cockroaches which only come out of hiding at night when my kids are asleep and my husband and I come out of the room for some snacks.

My house is quite clean and we don’t leave food lying around. We also have a live in helper who cleans everyday. I’m so perplexed by this issue. If I go out to the living room or kitchen at night, I’m sure to find at least three baby cockroaches. They are easy for me to kill at the moment but I don’t really want to face the big boss.

Anyone has tried and tested methods? Thank you!

Netizens’ comments

• There is a “cockroach paper” that you can use to line your cabinets. 100% works.
  But it’s a poison la so don’t put any food or kitchen ware directly on it.
  Alternatively the Cockroach poison bait
  But first identify where is the likely nest. Then you know where to place the bait of the cockroach paper
  • (OP) How does this paper work? They climb onto it and get stuck? Today I bought the combat brand cockroach trap and put at hard to reach places like side of the fridge and behind the dining table. I have a pesky toddler who loves to put things inside her mouth.
• The paper has like insecticide powder on it. Slow poison. When cockroach crawl on it the powder will stick to them. They will then slowly die. May return to nest and spread to others or when they die other cockroach eat them.
  You can get it from HDB hardware shops (those that sell various misc item. It’s really called cockroach paper)

My (22F) boyfriend (28M) doesn’t want me to perform

I do pole dancing to become fitter and I’ve always dreamed of performing. Not at strip clubs but rather at festivals and events.

I do showcase events with my studio in front of our friends and families (of the performers) and my boyfriend says this is okay but he doesn’t want me to perform at festivals or any other event.

He said that guys will be looking at my body and he doesn’t want other men to see me like that.

I am a bit upset as this is always something I’ve wanted to do if given the opportunity and it was also a goal I was working toward.

Any advice?

Here are what netizens think:

• You are allowed to do it anyway. He is also able to break up with you if you do it anyway. Did you try to explain you were working toward this goal and having important it is to you? I can see both sides of the disagreement. I guarantee my husband wouldn’t want me to do something like perform one front of community members or anyone who happens to be present. It’s not his choice to make, but he is allowed to tell you how he feels and that he doesn’t like it. Good luck OP.

• I don’t think this boundary of his is off limits. However, you should never sacrifice your dreams for a partner. You might resent him for missing out on a great opportunity later.

• My gf wouldnt want me to perform pole dancing in front of a crowd either. Not that I would or could or that the crowd ever wanted me to, but if I wanted she’d be uncomfortable with it and thats absolutely alright.

• Although I mostly agree, if the issue is really your partner’s insecurity, that should be looked at and addressed actively by them or this will not be the last challenge.

disobedience of general order

hi guys , im a recruit currently charged with disobedience of general order. so basically i went out on mc and i got caught twice by the police .

at first i was faced with malingering but after i produced what i was diagnosed with from my psychiatrist my PC decided to drop to disobedience of general order.

he told me that my CO will be the one handing out the charge. i got memo stating that whenever i feel down i will always go for a drink and my MO also said that for my case all my mc can go out so what will my charge most likely be ?

Netizens’ comments

• How did you get caught by the police?
• caught by police doing what?
• What caused the SPF to be drawn to you? And that twice? How?
• Last time I got a sgt who got caught outside despite being on MC, he was handed down with a 28 days SOL. Commander get caught for not staying home during MC, SOL. A trooper get caught most likely also SOL but shorter Abit
• Bro you mustve been doing something else that warrants police attention like shoplifting. Police dont care about military law only military police do

job hunting.

is it normal for employers to offer you a place, ask you to come down to sign contract and then 4 HOURS LATER they text you and say “sorry we found a more suitable candidate.”?

wtf?????? then you offer me for what sia might as well you dont? i find it so ridiculous even though i know legally they are not wrong haish

i rejected my other job offer for them and now i am left: unemployed again… shall continue job hunting…. anyone got any recommendations pls let me know!!! looking for a full time job ):

Update: had a call with the HR, demanded an explanation, couldn’t get any. spoke to the boss who told me “i don’t owe you an explanation. you say so much also no use i wont offer you a place again. lets call it a day here”

but i was too upset i said i know shes legally right but shes morally wrong which is prolly a bad move on my end too.

Netizens’ comments

• Definitely not normal and raises some red flags indeed! Extremely unethical HR practices.
• You should reject your other offer only after you signed the offer. Oh well, just treat it as lesson learned and move on.
• You dodged a bullet here. Employers like that are why their company sucks big time.
• damn unethical! especially since they even asked for your availability with signing the contract! i bet they did that bcos someone accepted their low offer! these companies just want cheap labour!

I feel like I’m never going to get a girlfriend, because i don’t have relationship experience

I hate myself so much I wish i wasn’t so ugly I just want a woman to want me back I’m tired of feeling lonely all the time.

I’m 20 but I look way too young for my age and I feel like no woman will want to talk to me because of it and I never get matches or likes on dating apps and I have a hard time coming up with stuff to talk about.

i even cold approach in public and at my job and still get rejected, girls only see me as a friend, even when i try to escalate things they still dont see me in that way.

recently i been treated ugly by women. this girl i liked said,”why would i date u, its better looking men in here”.

i had a feeling i was getting rejected because im ugly. one of my friends always make jokes that im ugly, and say thats why i dont get girls.

its true though thats why. he always tell me dont waste time approaching cute women because im gonna be rejected.

i mean hey he aint wrong. every time i tried to meet or talk to a girl, its always they have a boyfriend or they not interested.