I M32 am the sole income earner in our household and my wife is a housewife (she had a job but could no longer keep it due to health problems). We have a year daughter at home as well.

Ever since I started working from home my wife started treating me as if I was available to do whatever she needed me to do like fix this fix that, do laundry and etc. But I work long hours from home and I need to be committed and professional otherwise I’d risk losing my position.

She interrupted my work several times already. I had a conversation with her about it and asked that she stop asking me to do things until I’m done working and she said okay but it happened again days ago when she barged into my office with our daughter all of a sudden telling me to keep an eye on her while she visits the clinic.

I paused my work session because I was caught off guard she didn’t tell me beforehand. She said that she suddenly started feeling pain in her belly and needed to see the doctor asap. I explained that I had important work and could not stay with our daughter or keep her in the office while working. She said she won’t be long but I urged her to call her sister and let her come stay with our daughter. In my opinion, this seemed to be the one reasonable solution for both of us but she lashed out at me saying no because this was an emergency while my work could wait. She said she had no time to wait till her sister come over but I said I’d call her myself and tell her to come. I even suggested I pay here and all my wife had to do was wait a few minutes till her sister arrived.

She stormed out of the office with our daughter after calling me a selfish jerk with no empathy to keep her waiting longer before visiting the doctor. My sister-in-law came some 20 minutes later and my wife left then. I tried calling her to check on her but she purposely hung up on me a few times and when she got home she was still pretty pissed at me which I don’t get because I think that I provided a solution that allowed her to go to her dr appointment and allowed me to resume my work session but no.

She kept talking about what a horrible partner and father I was to refuse to provide help when she needed it and refused to sympathize with her difficult situation and making her wait for her sister when she needed to see the doctor asap. She’s now refusing to speak to me altogether. I think my compromise was reasonable, I don’t really get why she got so mad over it.

Here is what netizens think:

• If her stomach pain was so serious, how the F she got the energy to argue with you. Sounds more like she is making a scene and being dramatic.

• The problem is wife has been crying wolf. The end result is that when she may have really needed him, he thought it was more of the same.

• I agree, providing it genuinely was an emergency. If that were the case, he ought to step up even if he wasn’t working at home.

• Good luck for the rest of your marriage, you got a drama queen as a wife.

My 28 y.o wife and I (30) have been married for about a year now. Except for a few hiccups here and there, we’ve had a very smooth relationship. We support each other and even spend a lot of time doing household chores together.

However, there’s a quirk of hers that I find very annoying. She’s very susceptible to catching a cold and she has a runny nose most of the times she has a cold. And she has this dirty habit of blowing her nose loudly into a napkin wherever she is; even when I’m sitting right beside her and having dinner. I try very hard to act like it’s nothing, but within, I feel disgusted and nauseated.

Yesterday, when she did that, we were having dinner and it almost made me retch. She noticed and asked me if everything was okay. I couldn’t hold it in anymore and I told her that I found this habit of hers repulsive. I told her that she should’ve excused herself and gone to the bathroom. I put it across as delicately as possible, but she still got upset and said that it was “acceptable” to do that and that I shouldn’t fuss over what was simply “a bodily function.” This defensive attitude of hers irked me and I said, perhaps in a somewhat curt tone, that it was impolite and inconsiderate of her to do this in front of others, and that, as a woman, she should be more graceful and polished in her manners. When I said that, she simply stopped eating her meal and went away to the bedroom.

She’s been giving me the silent treatment since then and totally ignoring me. I’m not sure, but I think I might have heard her sobbing when I went to bed in the night. Even today morning, she didn’t eat the breakfast I’d made for her and had cereal instead. I tried to apologize but she pretended like I wasn’t even there. I kind of feel bad for her now. It’s “that” time of the month for her and she gets quite touchy and sensitive during that time. I think I might have been a tad bit harsh with her.

Here is what netizens think:

• What does her being a woman have to do with any of this? 

• When I read that, I still had the hopes that it was mentioned because they actually did it together. Like, a fun couples thing. Then, when the nose blowy thing started I still thought it could go two ways, if you really hate the sound or something you can discuss that.

• He’s so wonderful doing the womanly chores with her. Next time she needs to blow her nose she should wipe it on his sleeve. Show him what disgusting actually looks like

• Seriously, it was almost, almost understandable for him to feel grossed out

• My husband has this same reaction to blowing noses – he can’t even blow his own if he’s congested. And unfortunately I have allergies and constantly congested sinuses. And we compromise. Sometimes I step away, or try to be quiet and other times he just plugs his ears.

I’m a 39 yo single Mum of a 10yo. My ex-husband left when my daughter was 2 months old, took all our money, blamed me for the marriage breakdown (he was a serial manipulator through 3 yrs of our marriage) and disappeared (probably best as kid doesn’t even know him, so less stress & hurt for her). I got a good career, stable income and family support, so my life for the last 10 years was about my daughter and my job.

I had occasional dates, but nothing serious, no physical or emotional connection. I was really hurt by my ex, whom I loved very much, and it had taken a long time for me to heal, but I’m still petrified of the thought of having the same feelings for anyone else. I do have a history of anxiety and depression, so when I fall in love I tend to go overboard with being too emotional and probably overly clingy. The feeling also becomes all I think about, like an obsession, it distracts me from day to day things: work, chores, kid.

About a month ago I started seeing someone 6 years younger. We really hit it off: enjoy each other’s company, have lots of common interests, talk and text often, and this week had a very passionate first.

Now I’m finding that over the last two weeks I’ve been constantly thinking about him. It’s distracting, annoying, but I can’t do anything with myself. I have to admit that I’m falling for him, and it scares me to the point of being physically ill. I can’t concentrate on anything. And I’m starting to have self doubts – I’m not as young and attractive vs he is, what if he stops liking me when he finds out about my mental struggles, I’m not good enough – all the wonderful baggage that was engraved in my head by my ex.

So on one hand, I absolutely want to be with the man, but I’m basically afraid of how my own feelings affect me. And even more afraid about trusting again and being hurt. I’m lost as to whether I should keep it going, or for my sake (and his, of having to deal with a broken person like me) end it. What should I do?

Here are what netizens think:

Be frank with him about your baggage. If he said he’s on board and would help you out, then go for him. Life is short. Stop thinking about it too much. Things happen in the past should be a lesson for you to take precautions. At the same time, be honest about what you’re feeling to him. He’ll understand your struggle and hopefully will give you a hand.

Your dude realizes you have kids. You don’t need to have a “baggage” conversation. It is just unnecessary. It’s like planning to explain to him that you aren’t a virgin while holding your kid. Just don’t. It’s cool. It clearly isn’t a dealbreaker for him so don’t make it weird.

Hi. I am a 35 years old man and my partner is a 41 yr old woman. We have a 4 yr old son and have been together for 5 years. She keeps telling me she cannot stay with me and needs to be in a relationship with a woman. Back in 2015 when we first met she hinted that she liked women, too.

Based on solid evidence she has a trait of dishonesty in the past with me but, regardless, I had told her that I want a committed monogamous relationship and she said she was ok with it.

Despite, our relationship not working, she has lied to me on multiple occasions, and that she is saying she is gender fluid and cannot be with me, I cannot live without my son for an extended period of time on a regular basis and I do not want my 4-year-old to be hurt.

I really wish that my life can be normal, I don’t mind getting hurt. But my child is the one I worried about.

What should I do?

Here are what netizens think:

• You know it will never work like that. Coming from a broken home myself trust me when I tell you you’re better of separate. For both you and your child.

• “What can I do to minimise if not avoid my child being hurt by his mom wanting to be with a woman?” Uh, you sure this is about your son?

• Your son will get older and realise the situation and end up hating both of you for living a lie they were made to believe.
• Sometimes people don’t realise what is precious until its gone, start dating again
• This is going to be messy during the divorce

We met in September, been basically inseparable ever since. He made it official on valentine. We had a rough start but he promised he would work on his issues and so far he has been absolutely amazing.

I have these doubts about his honesty even though he hasn’t given me reason to. In fact, he does many small things that should, in theory, show me that he is committed and honest about his feelings for me.

One of the things he does that I appreciate the most is that he calls me whenever he can squeeze in any time between jobs, even when he’s with other people. He also says some pretty damn sweet and romantic things about/to me in front of/to his friends, which is a big one for me because of the type of person he is—aside from his incredible sense of humor (he is the funniest person I’ve ever met), he is a pretty serious, straight to the point, get to work, no time to screw around and no BS kinda guy so

Whenever he expresses his love, appreciation, and adoration the way he does, as often as he does, it’s always kind of a surprise to me. Plus, there’s the fact that he spends most of his non-working hours with me and spends every night at my place. That counts for something, right? Lol.

So far my doubts and suspicions have always been proven wrong and I end up feeling like a total idiot. A few days ago I made a comment that suggested I have the suspicion that he’s only in it for the “special”, and he later admitted he was pretty hurt by that.

Why can’t I fully enjoy my relationship and this love that I am lucky enough to have found?

This is honestly what I’ve been waiting for my whole life. I have always wanted a man who isn’t afraid to show how much he cherishes me, who says the most beautiful things, who constantly compliments me and shows me his desire for me, who is so considerate of what I might want and need even when we’re not together, whose actions clearly show that he thinks of me throughout the day, who acts like an old school gentleman… sometimes he doesn’t even let me put my own shoes on for fucks sake. I feel like I hit the jackpot, and the fact that he talks about forever, and that he wants to spend the rest of his life with me, and how I am the last and only woman he ever needs… it all feels so so perfect.

So I’m afraid my own trust issues will lead me to remain very skeptical, like I’ll want to keep myself at a “small” distance at all times, which could easily ruin everything eventually. How do I get over that?! How do you get rid of your trust issues?

Names changed to protect identities.

My best friend Sabrina who I’ve known for 16 years now, has been with her girlfriend Allison for 9 years now, they’ve lived together since 2014. (yes she is bi)

I’ve been with my girlfriend Kate for 13 years now, she moved from Thailand to be with me. We were planning to move to Thailand but the pandemic hit and we can’t do that yet. But we want to. We’re wealthy enough to, got no kids.

They’re a self-described “very femme less couple” and hate it if people assume one’s the masculine one, one’s the feminine partner.

I’ve known Sabrina since September 2004. Recently via my cousin Alex (works as food delivery rider) found out that Dad had been cheating on Mom with Sabrina, she said she’d seen Dad kissing this woman in a McDonald’s car park with her sitting on the hood of a sports car. She did get a photo which she sent me.

She didn’t confront my Dad but was embarrassed; she’d seen that as it was on her regular delivery route.

I’m an only child with no siblings. Dad was very upset when Mom was told she could have no more kids; my own birth was difficult according to mom.

I told her over Whatsapp that it was my best friend’s girlfriend and she was shocked. We didn’t get a chance to meet up in person so talked over Whatsapp instead.

As it is, I’ve told Sabrina, showed her the photo and she was crying; saying she wondered if she’d regretted 9 years of being with her and wonders what a postpandemic dating market will be like for her since she’s nearly 40.

I also confronted my Dad about it, and he didn’t deny it, saying “Mom’s getting obese” and “She’s losing her drive to Netflix”.

But those two things are nonsense; Mom’s 61, does hiking. She’s always been fit.

Dad seems to want to leave Mom for Allison and they seem to want to be married?

Allison as my stepmom? Weird or sick??

Looking for advice on how to support mom and my best friend.

I am a university student living in the dorms right now and was recently invited by two of my longtime friends to move in with them into our own place closer to the end of the calendar year. I knew my parents, especially my mom, would be hesitant about the idea but I never expected how intense their reactions would be.

My parents both got angry with me when I first brought it up two days ago. They said they thought it was a terrible idea and that it would not be conducive to my studying to have to worry about paying rent, bills, etc, and that they do not think I could handle the pressure.

For candidness’s sake, I do have some mental health issues (anxiety and depression) and also have ADHD that has caused me quite a bit of grief in the past year and a half, which is why my parents are concerned. I finally feel like I’m coming out of that slump though and that I’m ready to grow. I have been taking medication for several months now and going to therapy for about two months, which I think has been helping me a lot.

Personally, I feel like having some responsibility for the first time would be a great experience for me and help me build myself up as a functioning adult— I think it would benefit my mental health and help me become more confident of myself and able to trust my own judgement without relying on my parents approval for everything I do. My parents think I’ll just be digging myself into a hole for no good reason by moving out.

Their other reasoning is that my 2 friends happen to be guys (both 20y/o also). I fully understand the concern with a young woman living with two men, however, they’ve been my friends for 6 years, going on 7 now, and have never disrespected me in any form or been anything but great friends to me along the way. I trust them and do not think they would harm me, let alone anybody. My mom is particularly upset about this aspect. She’s worried that they’re going to have random guys at the apartment who might hurt me. I tried to explain that our friend group was pretty closed off, and my friends’ friends are also my friends, but she didn’t believe me. My parents were also questioning the financial aspect of me moving out and wether I’d be able to support myself while going to school full time. To make rent, utilities, and other expenses, I calculated that I would need to work 30 hours a week, which is 4 days for me. Personally, I feel this is doable as I already like to work on the weekends, so I’d only be at work on two weekdays. They don’t seem to agree. When I offered an alternative, which is to pay my rent portion through my plan (university fund set up by my grandparents) they said I would be wasting money, even though the cost would be half that of living in the dorms like I am now.

However, the main issue seems to be this: both of my friends work full time instead of going to university. My mom thinks that living with them would throw me off my path and that they’d convince me to throw school by the wayside and drop out

I’m not sure what to choose. Do I move out? Do I stay? I’m so confused now and hurt by the whole situation. I didn’t know this would cause such a huge fight. My friends say I should prove my parents wrong and show them that I can handle moving out, and my therapist says she thinks becoming more independent from them would be a good step for me, but I’m scared it will destroy my relationship with my mom. Help!

My boyfriend and I live on the top floor of an old old condo with only a few units. And nothing we do seems to stop the neighbours from complaining every time we make the slightest noise.

We have done everything I can think of:

• tiptoe everywhere at all times and never ever wear shoes inside
• vacuum or clean only once a month (way less than we’d like)
• limit intimacy to be on the earlier side, or in rooms other than the bedroom
• have literally 3x those little fabric foot-stoppers on every piece of furniture that might get pulled around or sat on
• bought about $250 of carpets for the apartment that we would not otherwise have (the only thing I’ve put my foot down on is putting a carpet in the dining room, because I think that would be gross and I’ve already covered the rest of my house in rugs)
• play our record player or any non-headphone music at minimum volume
• adjusted our bedtime to try and match theirs (they seem to go to bed at 10pm judging by when the texts arrive)
• text every time I’m planning to have guests over so they’re aware
• don’t use the washer/dryer that came with the apt because it shakes the floor and bothers them
• only play rhythm/dancing games, which I LOVE, when I know 100% that they are gone
• even though both my BF and I are musicians (violin and guitar), we never play because it’s not worth the angry text we would get

And yet it goes on. They have texted when we sit at the dining room table, when we go to bed, when I get too many texts (apparently they can hear the buzz even though it’s on the kitchen counter), when we take out the trash in the kitchen when I accidentally bump into something in the bedroom. It is making us feel like our only option is to stand still and do nothing.

About a month ago, they played really loud music in the bedroom at 6am (like bumping club music) which we thought was weird but not bothersome. But then, more recently, I dropped the remote in the bedroom at midnight, and the next morning at 6am they started banging on the ceiling right below the bed – not in response to anything we did, obviously, since we were asleep, but it seemed like revenge for waking them up.

It’s true, the walls are thin – I know because I hear their baby crying all the time, and I hear them fighting (though I wish they would enunciate more when they yell at each other, I’m petty like that). I truly sympathize with them, it must really suck to live in such a fragile building that you can hear when people so much as walk around. It’s just that there is nothing more I feel I can do. But I also feel helpless and frustrated that despite the fact that we have never done anything intentionally to bother them, they are now trying to hurt us because of things we can’t avoid.

I have also recently asked the neighbor who lives below THEM if noise is ever a problem for her. Her answer: yeah, they wake me up all the time, but I figure it’s an old apartment and they can’t really do anything about it. Which is the perspective I, my boyfriend, and everyone else I’ve ever known have had about neighbor noise.

What can I do?