I have been dating my 25y.o gf for about a year. And she visits the doctor A LOT. And I mean… a lot. Like once or twice every month.

She claims that she’s having lots of health issues (hypotension, chronic migraines, a minor heart condition). They all seem like minor issues (except her migraines) and I feel like she’s causing more harm than good by pumping her body full of pills.

She also developed a bunch of stomach ulcers due to all the medication. And recently she had an allergic reaction to some antibiotics because apparently she’s been experiencing diarrhoea for a week. Her reaction was severe and she had a fever of 40+ °C paired with mental confusion.

The next morning I decided to talk to her about her frequent trips to the doctor. I told her that taking too much medication might compromise her health further. That I haven’t met someone else that frequents the doctor as much as she does. And I also bought up the fact that health care is expensive… and asked her how she’s planning on sustaining her lifestyle.

She told me that money isn’t an issue – that her parents are helping her out and she’s on a great healthcare plan. And that I can’t compare her health to other people I know.

But I still feel like she’s compromising her health further….especially given her stomach ulcers. I reminded her that she’s still young, and if she causes damage to her body now it might cause more issues in the future.

She got upset at me and said that I have no right to speak on behalf of her body. That she’s fully aware of the side effects of the meds she’s on, but that she’s fine with it.

She went to her parents and haven’t returned yet. She’s not talking to me either. I reached out to her parents to ask if she’s okay. They say I was out of line, and that she’s dealing with a lot at the time. She’s still recovering from her allergic reaction and they reminded me that illness is something that she’s been dealing with for ages.

She’s ignoring my texts and calls. Was I out of line? did i do wrong?

Here is what netizens think:

• Hypotension and a heart condition are more concerning than migraines in a 25 y/o. Diarrhea isn’t an allergic reaction, it’s a side effect that some experience on some antibiotics. A fever is also not an allergic reaction.In short you have no idea what the hell you’re talking about. She’s seeing her doctor about her health. of course your wrong

• my sister went to the doctors for 3 years in considerable pain and the (male) gp accused her of being addicted to the pain medication they were prescribing while they barely looked into the cause – eventually she was rushed to the hospital where, surprise! It was stage 4 cancer the whole time! Luckily she got onto a trial for immunotherapy and it’s really helping her – her cancer is looking like it might be dormant now, 3 years later! – but before the trial, even with chemo, her life expectancy was only months by the time they found it

I’m 26 this year and I have a wife that is 2 years older than me and she is currently 3 months pregnant. We were watching a movie last night when I got up to use the bathroom. I was gone a little bit, as I’ve been dealing with a nasty stomach bug from food poisoning.

When I came back from the bathroom, she wasn’t on the couch. Confused, I went looking for her, and found her outside the door smoking a cigarette. I was FURIOUS.

Keep in mind, our unborn child is a planned pregnancy. We’ve been trying for over a year and were overjoyed when we learned that we were expecting. I’m so excited to be a father and ready to marry her soon.

In the heat of the moment, I might’ve been a bit harsh, but I was so shocked! I didn’t even know she smoked. After I found her and expressed how I was frustrated and confused, she screamed at me that it was just a singular cigarette. She also confessed that she’s been having a few shots a week with her girlfriends, and the doctors haven’t said a word.

She made me sleep on the couch last night, and she hasn’t said a word to me since. I just got home from work, and she’s said nothing.

Am I the bad husband for getting frustrated with her about this? She says it’s not a big deal, but I feel like it is. I tried talking to her sister, who’s had a few kids already, but she doesn’t think it’s a big deal, either.

How am I wrong…

Here is what netizens think:

• Absolutely they are different, that’s why I’m not defending that woman in the post. Smoking and taking shots is bad.

• 100% this!! I know a woman who wouldn’t eat a chocolate chip cookie while pregnant because of the caffeine in chocolate. Meanwhile every other woman in the office had their daily coffee throughout their pregnancies with no negative affects. Don’t drink. Don’t smoke. Don’t do drugs. Anything else, get out of my body.

• In medical training, we’re actually told that the recommendation is still 0 alcohol during pregnancy since it’s still uncertain what amount is “safe”

• but it sounds like she might want to… lose the baby? Or something strange is happening to her. OP doesn’t even know she smokes (which means she at least doesn’t usually do it) and decides the best moment to enjoy smoking isnwhile pregnant?

• Starting Smoking on the other hand is really really really bad behaviour, and again, it just seems really strange, and somehow worse then someone who stopped smoking sneaking one, I just don’t understand who STARTS smoking when they’re pregnant?