It has always been one of my life goals to raise kids of my own. I look forward to the day when my kid come running to me as I come back home from work.
Spending time with my children and my wife on the weekend at the playground sounds like a perfect day to me. For the most part of my life, having children of my own in the future was an integral part of my life.
However, as the title suggests, my girlfriend does not want to have children. We have been together for exactly a year and as we both takes our relationship seriously the conversation about having children naturally came up. She reasoned that she’s afraid of how childbirth could affect her mental heath, physical body, and her own mortality. The biggest reason for her is, however, the pain of childbirth. She has a particularly low tolerance of pain and could not imagine herself feeling the chronic pain in the 9 months of pregnancy. More importantly, she’s afraid of the pain that comes with the actual childbirth, be it through natural childbirth, or C-section, both of which scares the living crap out of her. Therefore, she is actually okay with the idea of adopting instead since it will not involve the pains that comes with pregnancy.
We are at this juncture of the conversation now where the ball is at my court, where I have to decide whether I can live without having biological children in the future. We truly love each other with both of our hearts but it is because of this inherent difference in life goals that now we have to decide that if we have to go our separate ways. At this moment, I can say that most part of me could forgo the idea of having biological children in the future just so we could continue our relationship.
I need advice on whether I should compromise one of my life goals just so that I can continue our relationship?