My bf wants to get drunk alone with his female friend and sleep over with her

We’ve been dating 3 years and he’s known her for maybe 10 months. They became pretty close while our relationship became strained due to going long distance for the past year.

He sees her somewhat often but has never really made plans to visit me without my initiating the planning in some way over the past year.

He told me today he’s going to go over to her place, get drunk and sleep over.

I feel like he’s being disrespectful to our relationship, but he dismissed me and said “the plans are kinda already set in stone, so…”

What do I do?

Netizens’ comments

• You dump him. He is showing you who is first in his life and it isn’t you.
• That’s wildly disrespectful to your relationship, especially that you voiced your concern about it crossing your boundaries. The “already set in stone” is a BS excuse. I think the only answer is to end things now before it gets worse.

The frustration of a middle class whom failed to plan.

I am currently in late 30s, and currently married with 1 kid. I am earning 30k a month, and my wife is around 15k a month.

We are staying in a humble resale HDB flat in Punggol, with no maid. We basically save more then we spent, but I just cant help thinking why I am not rich at all.

Recently I met a friend that bought a BTO, and sold it for around 200 plus k profit, and bought an EC in the time being.

now he and his wife each own a condo, where as I am still staying in a HDB.

I failed to plan, and I decided to start spending effort, but met with tons of hurdles

1) EC got income ceiling, that i dont understand why? HDB yes is provide shelter for all of us, but EC with subsidies? the other plus point is that you can but the EC when launched without incurring ABSD.

2) I am so dumb not to just use 1 owner, and 1 essential occupier for the HDB, now i cant use just 1 person name to buy a condo to avoid ABSD.

3) It is so troublesome, to have to sell my hdb first then to buy the condo, if not the 17% ABSD will take a serious toll of my saving. Let said a district 9-10 condo at 3m, the ABSD will already be $510k!

Just to rant, as the journey of investment is best to start with a BTO. Also hope that middle class like us are allowed to buy an EC. There should be no restriction on income.

Here are what netizens think:

• I understand you frustration. I earn close to you.. Ard 35k per month plus minus. Wife abit more than yours.. 21k..I stayed in 4 rooms. Every month I feel the pinch of not enough cash to spend and feeling like my life if heading to a dead end. Sometimes I will argue with my wife over our finances. Really feeling the stress of Inflation and I wonder how my kids are going to survive in the future.
• Nabei! You earn $30k per month u consider yourself middle class?. Then i what? low class? CCB
• I tell u something, u be grateful for wat u have been blessed with! N just for your info ur in the top tier of earners in sg. Save enough n go make memories with your family, otherwise with ur comparing nature with others, u will hv alot of walls n concrete n metal but no memories. Good Luck!

My (30F) boyfriend (30M) of 5 months keeps accusing me of cheating

This morning he woke me up with kisses on my neck, being sweet. He whispers “Look, I get turned on by just laying next to you”. He was hard, we made love.

After I went up to make him breakfast in bed and he looked really happy becaused I put some extra effort into it. After breakfast we got intimate again but after we finish this time, his mood completely shifts.

I asked him if everything was alright and he says “yes, but I guess that’s not completely true”. So I keep asking him what’s wrong, because his voice sounds angry. “I’m not allowed to talk about that”, he says.

I instantly knew he was thinking about me with other guys/cheating. Last weekend he sat on phone and screamed at me until I completely fell apart in tears, and beyond, about cheating. I have never cheated on him. We meet very often and when I’m not with him I sit home studying, playing PC games or hang with my dog. I barely have friends or family. I like it like this, but it’s ironic how he still finds some way to accuse me.

The reason he said he’s not allowed to talk about it is because we both after that agreed to not talk about that again. He apologized sincerely to me and said he trusts I don’t cheat.

He thinks I cheat on him because I lied to him about what I did on New Years. We weren’t dating the last New Years eve. We started dating a month-two:ish after but we talked about the evening some time. Since I am quite a loner I told him I had a friend over, out of embarrassment of the truth. Truth was that I was just on a walk with my dad then went home alone and went to bed. He uses this lie of mine to justify all accusations of cheating that he comes up with.

As a local Singaporean living in the heart of the city, I have noticed an increase in the number of girls I see working in pubs.

These girls are usually in their late teens or early twenties, and they are working as hostesses. This is a job that does not require any specific qualifications, and it pays well for a short period of time.

While I’m glad to see my young female Singaporeans taking up jobs that provide an income, I’m also concerned about what these girls are getting themselves into. Working in bars and pubs can be dangerous and the girls could be exposed to a variety of risks. They could be the targets of harassment or even worse, physical assault. Furthermore, the long hours and late nights can take a toll on their mental and physical health.

Back in the day, there were only Viet, Thai and PRC and Malaysians. Locals were considered rare.

I’m also worried about the long-term implications of working in pubs. This type of job does not provide the girls with any skills or qualifications that will help them in the future. They are just earning quick cash, and this could lead to a cycle of dependence on this type of work.

It is also hard to overlook the fact that these girls are being exploited by the pub owners. They are being paid very little for the work they do, and they are not given any benefits or protection. The owners are taking advantage of their vulnerability and lack of experience, and this is a worrying trend.

I understand that for some of these girls, working in pubs is a way to make money quickly. But I believe that there are better ways for them to make money. I think that the government should provide more support to young Singaporeans, and create more opportunities for them to gain skills and qualifications that will help them in the long run.

I also think that the pub owners should be held accountable for their actions. They should be encouraged to hire young people who are qualified and trained to do the job, and they should be held responsible if their employees are exposed to any risks.

At the end of the day, I’m glad to see my young Singaporeans earning money, but I’m also concerned about their safety and long-term prospects. I hope that the government and pub owners will take action to protect these young people and provide them with the support they need.

I never thought that getting COVID-19 would cause such a huge disruption in my life. As a young girl in her early twenties, I always considered myself to be healthy and invincible.

It all started with a slight cough and a fever that I thought was just a common cold. But as the days went by, my symptoms worsened and I knew something was wrong. When I finally got tested, the results came back positive for COVID-19. I was shocked and scared, but I was determined to fight this virus and get back to my normal life as soon as possible.

I isolated myself at home and followed all the necessary precautions. I took all the prescribed medications and drank plenty of fluids.

However, my excitement was short-lived when I received an email from my bank manager asking me to come back to work. I was surprised and confused because I thought my manager would be understanding of my situation. But as I read the email, I could sense the disappointment and frustration in my manager’s words.

He mentioned that the bank was short-staffed and they needed all hands on deck. He also expressed his disappointment that I had taken such a long leave of absence, stating that it had caused inconvenience to my colleagues and customers. He ended the email by asking me to come back to work as soon as possible.

I felt a mix of emotions – guilt, anger, and disappointment. I understood the importance of my job and the need for all employees to be present during these challenging times. But I couldn’t believe that my manager was not even considering my health and well-being.

I decided to call my manager and explain my situation to him. I told him about my experience with COVID-19 and how I had followed all the necessary protocols. I also mentioned that I was not feeling better and not ready to come back to work. But my manager was not convinced. He kept insisting that I come back immediately and that my absence had caused a lot of inconvenience to the bank.

I was hurt and frustrated. I had always been a dedicated and hardworking employee, and I never thought that my manager would treat me like this. I tried to reason with him, but he was adamant that I come back to work as soon as possible.

Feeling defeated, I decided to consult with my doctor and get a medical certificate stating that I was fit to return to work.

I will quit soon

When I finally returned to work, I could feel the tension and awkwardness between my manager and me. It was clear that he was still unhappy with my absence. But I was just grateful to be back and to have recovered from the virus.

This experience taught me the importance of empathy and understanding in the workplace. As an employee, I always put my job first, but I never expected my manager to prioritize the bank’s needs over my health. I hope that in the future, employers will be more understanding and considerate of their employees’ well-being, especially during a global pandemic.

My family took me to one of those Japanese steakhouses where they cook the food at your table when I was very young am I’m 30 this year.

When the cook lit the grill and the huge flame shot up into the air, it scared the heck out of me and I ran and hid in the corner and was too afraid to come back to the table. My aunt, (64F) has teased me about that ever since. That was twenty-five years ago and I swear she brings it up every single time I see her! I’ve told her repeatedly to stop talking about it. My parents have also asked her to stop bringing it up to no avail. It’s gotten so tiresome and embarrassing and she teases me about it in front of the whole family despite me repeatedly telling her to stop.

I hate the size of my genitals it’s too thin, too short and it’s making me MISERABLE.

For a while I’ve been wanting to get back into dating. I never really wanted to step away from pursuing it, but I was given no choice by todays standards.

The biggest factor in this is the size of my manhood, I simply cannot bring myself to go the extra step because of this. A little bit of a back story – I have been rejected TWICE for my size.

The last one, which was 3 years ago, went ahead and made fun of me over my size. To quote how it was put “you’ll never win anyone over with that, your life will be miserable”.

Well I can tell you for nothing, some may find it harsh, but she certainly wasn’t wrong. It has been a complete misery to say the least. Word got out about that and I even lost friends over it. She was still an angel in everyone’s eyes, but I was too much of an embarrassment in everyone’s eyes and it broke people away from me.

Since then, I’ve faded off, the pandemic also showed where people’s loyalties are when I spent it entirely alone. Honestly feels life if I had been killed off by the virus in my own home in 2020, I would still be laying there rotting now. Nobody reached out.

I recently went with an escort just to have any form of action – I thought it would make me feel better, but the doubts of my size are just as bad. I asked if the escort even felt anything from my size. Now obviously she is going to say yes to keep her client happy, but I thought it would give me some hope, but nothing. My girth size is 4.4 to maybe 4.5 circumference. The length is just touching 5 inches. People are going to say that’s average, which I find to be total crap. There’s no way it is.

Anyway, idk what to do. I’ll probably try therapy. It may fix some issues but this whole nightmare regarding my hatred for my size, it won’t do a thing. When you know what the common women’s standards are for genital size which has been made clear everywhere you go, no amount of therapy is coming to convince me to lie to myself, become “confident” which in the end, the confidence will make me look a delusional clown in front of a woman and in turn will make her think “why does this guy think he has a chance lol”.

I need some advice.

At age 37 my bf is only at the executive level. he earns around $4500 a month. I expect him to earn around $15k a month for a director-level position. At his age, he should be a GM/Director by now but he is just a lowly legal counsel with low pay working for an SME business with little to no benefits.

Should I leave him? Should I look for something better for myself? I am a 23-year-old local Chinese. And I still feel that I have a future unlike him. I don’t want to waste other opportunities for other men to provide me a better life. FYI he took a year just save up for a Gucci Bag. How pathetic is that?

We have been together for 5 years and I had not seen him get a promotion or increment since then. Girls and Guys please help. my BF is a local guy Chinese

Here are what netizens think:

• Leave him, but for his sake.
• Ok your post made me feel blessed that I am not rich, or else I will attract a gold digger. Thts real bad luck. You want an advice? Sure. For a materislic girl like you. It’s better you stay single forever. Don’t ruin a guy’s life, no matter how good or bad he is. Don’t tarnish our local girl’s reputation too. Later all men run away from those whom are singles. And yes please leave him, ASAP too. You want Gucci or branded bags? Buy yourself lah. You got a job and money mah.
• Why so materialistic and weighing relationship on monetary aspect. No wonder a few men that I know say that they are intimidated by these type of women. Leave him please so that he can find someone genuine who is kind, encouraging, caring and does not value relationship based on money!
• If ppl earn 15k a month, he definitely know how to calculate ROI. Invest in u is a depreciation coz u will start to grow old, out of shape n etc, therefore will need more n more money maintaining each year while investing in property/stock is much better option for a better ROI. So stop wasting ur time n look for another. Oh ya, leave ur current bf, he deserve better
• I think you should totally leave him! He is not suitable for you. He does not deserve you. In fact, he deserve way better! He deserve someone who is worthy of his love! And he deserve someone who can think and be better for him. If all u want is Gucci bag and LV, Prada, pls leave him. I’m sure he has other girls waiting in line to shower him with the love he deserve.

I married my then girlfriend when I was still in NTU. Why?

I got her pregnant and I decided to be responsible for it. The problem is my girlfriend is from a rich family (good class bungalow level) and my family is not so well to do.

My dad is a taxi driver and my mum is a housewife, I got into NTU on a scholarship. Our wedding is a simple affair, with a wedding banquet at a 4-star hotel without any photo booth. My parents lent me the money to buy our wedding bands (nothing fancy too) , photoshoots, wedding gown and the banquet itself.

We did not even have any honeymoon as I simply cannot afford it. I am thankful to my parents and also my wife and her family. They did offer to pay for everything ,but after discussions with my wife, i decided against it.

You can call me proud or stupid but i feel its the right thing to do. I married my wife because I love her and our child and not because of her family’s wealth. My parents-in-law are very supportive and never once look down on me but they do expressed their concern if I am able to juggle my role as a student, husband and father.

I was also worried but my wife is my pillar of strength during this period of time when I juggle these roles. I manage to graduate and we applied our BTO together. Although we had our arguments, my wife never complains that she regretted our marriage and leaving behind her 大小姐lifestyle. She used to go on multiple shopping trips per year overseas and do not think twice about spending her money on branded goods.

She became a loving mother that will help me to compare the prices of diapers and milk powders so that we can save some money. She rather i save the money for our children’s education rather then spending on gifts for her.

I owe everything that I have now to her. I can’t say i am super successful now but I am currently an assistant director in a stat board. I am happily married with 2 kids and a loving wife who is not materialistic.

Trust me there are girls who are not materialistic who are out there and try cares for you and I am super lucky to have her.”