Lately our intimacy hasn’t been the best. We (me F 25, him M 36) haven’t really been active the last few weeks which isn’t typical for us.
We’ve been together for 2 years. He’s been stressed out from work, and it’s been an unfortunate time of the month for me.
Every time I’ve tried to get off manually, it’s impossible because either he interrupts me right as i’m close and I can’t get back in the mood, or our toddler is running around on a rampage.
Today, I decided to go purchase a self pleasure toy. I told him when he got home from work, and he told me I was selfish, and that he was done.
Went on about how he’s sorry he can’t satisfy me and that I should go marry my toy instead. that I’ve used 1 time.
I honestly thought it was harmless, but now I’m feeling a little ashamed for pleasuring myself. I figured it was a better alternative that getting it somewhere else?
Is it not normal in a long term relationship to masturbate? I’m really questioning my decision and feeling regret.
The Mid Valley Southkey shopping center in Johor Baru was evacuated at approximately 6:45 pm today due to an alleged bomb scare. The incident left shoppers and bystanders on edge, prompting a swift response from local authorities.
The Evacuation
The sudden evacuation of the Mid Valley Southkey shopping center sent shockwaves through the area. Shoppers, initially unaware of the impending danger, were swiftly ushered out of the mall by vigilant security personnel. The urgency of the evacuation left many bewildered, and the situation grew more unsettling by the minute.
Balbeer Singh Jessy, a 62-year-old lawyer and former journalist, provided an eyewitness account of the unfolding events. According to Jessy, the evacuation order was issued at 6:40 pm after an alarm was triggered. Shoppers were initially under the impression that a gas leak had occurred, creating an atmosphere of confusion and concern.
Initial Impression
The initial confusion stemmed from the belief that the alarm signified a gas leak, a relatively common occurrence in public spaces. Shoppers, not initially alarmed, were guided by security guards to evacuate the mall. The situation took a dramatic turn when it was revealed that the alarm was, in fact, a bomb threat.
The Revelation
As the realization set in that the situation was more dire than initially thought, anxiety among shoppers increased. The transformation from a suspected gas leak to a bomb threat added a layer of complexity to the evacuation process, causing distress and unease.
Evacuation Process
The evacuation process involved moving shoppers out of the mall and into the open-air car park located in front of the main entrance. The process was carried out swiftly and efficiently, with the safety of the public as the top priority.
Number of Evacuees
The scale of the evacuation was significant, with an estimated 1,000 or more members of the public being evacuated to the open-air car park. The sheer number of people involved added to the challenge of managing the situation effectively.
Waiting for Safety
As of the time of writing, the evacuated individuals are patiently waiting for authorities to declare the area safe. This waiting period is filled with uncertainty and anxiety, as everyone hopes for a swift resolution to the situation.
Social Media Reaction
Unsurprisingly, the incident quickly made its way onto social media platforms. Shoppers and bystanders took to social media to share their experiences and concerns. The public’s collective voice added a layer of complexity to the unfolding situation.
Videos and Photos
Videos and photos shared on social media platforms, including X (formerly known as Twitter), provided a visual narrative of the events. People were seen congregating near the mall’s surroundings, unable to leave the area due to their cars being parked in the lot. Additionally, a fire engine was spotted outside an entrance to the mall, and the sound of a fire alarm was reported.
Emergency Services
The presence of a fire engine at the scene and the activation of a fire alarm underscored the seriousness of the situation. The cooperation of emergency services was essential in maintaining public safety during this tense time.
Road Closure
Reports suggested that the roads leading to the shopping center were cordoned off by the police. However, given the dynamic nature of the situation, the accuracy of such reports could not be verified at the time of writing.
Verification of Information
During emergencies like bomb scares, the spread of information can be chaotic and unverified. This incident exemplifies the challenges in ensuring accurate and timely communication in the midst of crisis situations.
“The Singapore Consulate-General in Johor Baru is aware of reports that visitors to the Mid Valley Southkey Mall and St Giles Hotel in Johor Baru have been asked to evacuate temporarily due to alleged security and safety concerns.
“Singaporeans in the vicinity are advised to exercise caution, monitor the local news, and heed the instructions of the local authorities.
“Singaporeans are also strongly encouraged to e-register with MFA at https://eregister.mfa.gov.sg if they have not done so.
“Singaporeans who require urgent consular assistance can contact the Consulate-General at +60 19 791 1166 or the 24-hour MFA Duty Office at +65 6379 8800 / 8855,”
Is it just me or do many Singaporean young men want kids
I’ll start by saying that this is purely based on observation/interaction with the people around me, and that the views may not be representative of all young adults in Singapore.
I’m 24F, graduated from university last year and have been in the workforce since then. I’ve met a couple of guys around my age (24-27 years old) either from school or other social events but none of my relationships have worked out thus far because I’m not too keen on having kids (I don’t mind though I’m leaning more towards a no at this point in time) and all the guys that I’ve dated so far want kids (it’s a must for them because they want to leave something behind for the world when they die).
I’ve spoken to many of my other female friends my age who are single (and working) and they have been saying the same thing. They find it hard to find a guy of a similar age and in a similar phase of life as us (aka working and not studying) because guys our age (or slightly older) who are still single generally want kids. Not quite sure how true this is and hence the question. Maybe my sample population is flawed.
Netizens’ comments
do you have any guesses why guys your age arent working yet
are you sure? guys prefer a more laid back life. having kids is more work and responsibility. some men don’t even want to cook or do any chores let alone change diapers, teach or feed someone.
If I don’t have to suffer 10 months and can offload the shitty part of child rearing to the wife/mother/grandmother and not have my career affected by having a kid, I also want la.
Me I want kids. If my wife comes from a very rich family, then I’d like enough for an 8-men section.
Easy to say they want a football team when they’re not the ones dealing with the body destroying work and you have a baby to take care of after. That being said my kid has been the best thing to ever happen to me and I would do it all over again but god damn it’s a hard do not recommend. The first 1-2 years getting a solid 4 hours of sleep was a luxury, social life is gone, you literally see you become a shell of your former self from the lack of sleep. It’s heartbreaking. But the joy. The love you experience and the wonder watching the little human become themselves is something that makes everything worth it. You really, REALLY need to be sure you want this before anything else.
My phone got stolen in the females toilet at tampines SAFRA yesterday. Saw a woman with a bag go into the same cubicle and when I realised and went back it was gone.
Tried calling it but I think the thief turned off the phone. Security said no one returned it and I reported to the police already.
Changed my iCloud password and didn’t sign out of the device, suspended my SIM card, suspended my paynow, gave the IMEI number to the police already.
Is there anything else I can do? Has anyone got their phone stolen and the police found it? I really want it back.
I’ve been crying all night because I just got it this year and it was really expensive and all of my graduation pictures I took yesterday are there.
Netizens’ comments
Sorry to hear that but your photos might be in your icloud account
(OP) I didn’t put my photos on iCloud because I already have Google photos. However I hadn’t backed it up yet so it’s still all on the phone :/
Tough luck bro, need police to find out from SAFRA the identity of the thief, shouldn’t be too hard if she’s a member and entered through a gantry
(OP) I actually didn’t tell them about the woman because I wasn’t sure, but I told them the location and how the phone looks like. Should I call them to update?
Then the police catch what, their imagination meh?
Lmao very low chance la, ask your friends to send you the photos when you get a new phone.
Singapore Police’s crime prevention tips
Dishonest Misappropriation of Property (DMOP) refers to the misappropriation of any found and moveable property, by a person, who decides to keep it for his/her own use.
Preventing crime is everyone’s responsibility. Here are some tips you can adopt to prevent yourself from becoming a victim of such crimes:
Do not leave your belongings unattended or unsecured. Common scenarios include using items to reserve seats in hawker centres or in public places.
Remember to take all your valuables before you leave.
If you have misplaced your valuables in a commercial building such as a shopping mall, you should seek help from the customer service counter/retail shop/security staff immediately.
A number of online services have been reported to be down, including DBS ATMs and iBanking services, according to several users on social media and DownDetector.
A short message on the DBS website stated that “Our customers are not able to access our digital services for the time being. We are reactivating our branches to assist you with your transaction requests. We seek your patience while we actively work to resolve the issue. We are sorry for the inconvenience caused.”
As of 4.02pm, there was a peak of about 3,917 reported outages by users trying to use DBS services, and at the time of writing, reports are still coming in from customers who are not able to use DBS services.
According to Channel NewsAsia, among the services that are down include DBS PayLah!, the iBanking app, DBS’s paywave feature, and ATMs reportedly showed messages stating that the machines were “offline”.
Stuck at Coffee Bean
Several user took to social media to complain about the outages, with a netizen sharing that he was stuck at The Coffee Bean while buying drinks because his Paywave and the iBanking app was not working.
Other users chimed in and revealed that even PayNow and PayLah services were down as well, and disgruntled customers started calling out the bank.
GetGo user can’t extend booking & kena $50 charge
Another netizen shared that he couldn’t extend his GetGo car rental booking because of the outage, and received a $50 late return charge because he couldn’t make payment for the final fare.
Other users also had problems completing transactions at places such as FairPrice, a local bakery, 7-Eleven and Cold Storage, among others.
Stuck in carpark
A netizen shared that he was stuck inside the carpark and can’t get out because he can’t make payment to top up his cashcard.
Stuck at Esso
Another netizen shared that his sister tried to pay for petrol at Esso using her DBS credit card but the payment couldn’t go through, and she got stuck at the petrol station.
Other online services also down
Among the other online services that are reportedly down, according to DownDetector and netizens, include:
Whatsapp
POSB
Citibank
Singtel
Visa
Starhub
Facebook
M1
MyRepublic
Instagram
Gmail
Grab
Telegram
Standard Chartered
Twitter
YouTube
HSBC
LINE
Amazon
Deliveroo
Apple Pay
Gojek
Samsung Pay
DBS’s Facebook statement
[Update – 9.25am, 15 Oct 2023]
All our services, including DBS/POSB digibank and DBS PayLah!, have returned to normal as of this morning.
However, any customer who may still experience difficulties logging into their accounts via their mobile app can try to log in with digibank online/ internet banking using SMS OTP.
We are also aware that some of our customers’ PayNow/FAST transactions were interrupted when the disruption happened, and will be processing these with utmost priority. We will update customers on the status of these transactions when processing has been completed.
We appreciate our customers’ patience and are sorry for the inconvenience caused.
—
[Update – 10.10pm, 14 Oct 2023]
As we continue our service recovery, we would like to update our customers on the following:
• All our ATMs are now up and running
• Our branches, which were re-activated this afternoon to assist customers, are now closed.
• Some services, including DBS/POSB digibank and DBS PayLah!, remain unavailable and we continue to work to recover them.
The service disruption was caused by an issue at a data centre. The data centre provider, Equinix, has issued a statement on the incident (which affected various organisations) and is conducting a thorough investigation.
We will provide more updates as the recovery progresses. We sincerely apologise for the inconvenience caused to all our customers.
—
[Update – 6.08pm, 14 Oct 2023]
Our investigations indicate that the service disruption was caused by an issue at a data centre which is also being used by various other organisations.
We are doing our utmost to swing over to our backup data centre, and expect to progressively restore services from 7pm today.
Meanwhile, all our branches (except Tampines Central, Tampines One and White Sands*) have been re-activated and are now open to assist you. Our branch locations can be found here: https://www.dbs.com.sg/index/locator.page
We seek your patience as we recover our services.
Please be assured that our systems are uncompromised, and your monies and deposits remain safe.
*POSB Tampines Central and DBS Tampines One are being relocated, while POSB White Sands is currently under refurbishment.
—
[Update – 4.37pm, 14 Oct 2023]
Our customers are not able to access our banking services for the time being. We seek your patience while we actively work to resolve the issue.
We are reactivating our branches to assist you with your transaction requests
Please be assured that our systems are uncompromised. We will provide updates here as soon as they become available.
Coworker Got Laid Off (a.k.a. Fired) Today – Management Got Pissed When I Left For The Weekend
My company had a round of layoffs today. Unexpected considering the company is profitable and they just hired people. We do IT Project work with the current project due in about 45 days and we’re ahead of schedule.
Anyway, my coworker was called into a meeting, terminated, told to grab his stuff, and walked out. This happened to about 10 others at my company today as well.
My boss came over to tell me this was due to “rightsizing” and I was pretty much speechless.
About two hours later he tells me I need to stay tonight (Friday) to wrap up tasks my coworker was working on then come in on Saturday for a team meeting to discuss splitting his tasks starting Monday.
When I told my boss I was leaving since I had personal business to tend to this evening and weekend (I really do) he said that this would look bad on me Monday and that he was extremely disappointed in me.
I told him I was disappointed in the company and would see him Monday. And they wonder why workers are not loyal or “don’t want to work.”
Netizens’ comments
Guess they probably should have figured all that out before they fired your coworker. Sounds like its above your paygrade to put a plan in place for their mistake.
They get away with this stuff because after a round of layoffs most employees cower to their demands even further as they fear they too might lose their job soon.
“Wrapping up THEIR tasks/ dividing THEIR responsibilities is not my concern. I’m not paid 2 incomes and moving forward I won’t be adding any tasks to my workload as it wasn’t MY decision to “right size” the team. Have a great weekend”
“Rightsizing” implies plenty of remaining employees so that overtime & weekend work is unnecessary. OP, they have unintentionally made you very important and I hope you adamantly refuse any extra hours.
We more or less sometimes enjoy each other’s company. Sometimes, because the other times I am getting yelled at for ridiculous things.
It’s been about 10 yrs or so since we have been intimate with each other. We sleep in different bedrooms, rarely kiss, and rarely have any physical contact.
I finally went to therapy this year, I know I should leave this relationship, but I stay for my daughter. My daughter is the only reason I am still around, she is my world.
She is my wild child, my princess, not only am I her Dad, but also a good friend to her. We have a lot in common, she shares quite a bit with me, talks to me, knows I don’t judge, always gets the benefit of doubt, and that I will listen.
I treat her like I would want to be treated at her age. My wife gets mad that I have a better relationship with her than she does and expects me to yell at her when my wife antagonizes her.
My wife expects me to defend her. She is all about control, constantly, and if she doesn’t get her way she gets angry, starts yelling, screaming until either she get what she wants or shuts herself in her room or straight up and leaves.
I am dependent on her for a lot of things because I am disabled.
I am thinking of finally leaving, I hope I can go through it. I know I should have left sooner, but I couldn’t, would have had no chance to get custody of my daughter.
I also didn’t want to tear my family apart, I never thought I would have one, that I wasn’t deserving of one, then I got one, and I really tried to work things out, but she was against marriage counseling, therapy, or anything that help.
She expected me to change, but not herself. Nothing is her fault, all mine. I hope I can go through with leaving, I need the strength to do it.
Told I was a terrible employee but also I was screwing them over when I put in my notice
Just needed to vent this. Worked at a small firm, no working remote or hybrid, hated my boss, hated working there, barely saw my kids. No benefits, no real plan to the whole place.
Finally get a new job near my home with people who actually care that I have a family.
Put in my notice and these guys LOSE it. I was expecting a reaction but it was nuts. They immediately demand to know if I had told my new job not to talk to them.
Had to explain why they wouldn’t just contact my current employer out of the blue. Then told that my work had been substandard and sloppy, I don’t work hard enough, and I had been lucky not to be fired already.
THEN they told me that I was screwing them over because they wouldn’t have anyone to replace me and they would take a financial hit.
I asked them which is it; do I suck or was I screwing them over by quitting? They went on to ask if I was making more money at the new job (I didn’t tell them but yes), as well as accuse me of using confidential work product when I applied for the new job (no way).
And then they ask why I didn’t tell them I was looking for a job (I didn’t even really know how to explain that one it’s so obvious).
The entire process definitely made me glad to be leaving that toxic place.
Netizens’ comments
We had a person resign at my job. I took on a couple of tasks they usually did, as I had the knowledge/skill and was going to apply for the role. Part way through one of those projects I was told I wasn’t getting an interview. Cue shocked pikachu when I told them I wasn’t qualified, per their determination, to finish the project. Which is it? Am I good enough to do the job or not? Had I gotten an interview and not gotten the job, I’ve got no issue. But slam the door in my face, a natural consequence is I’m not gonna keep being helpful in that role. I like my workplace, but even the good ones are just trying to squeeze everything they can out of you.
I know it’s stressful but enjoy the salt. They have no leverage over you now and it’s making them lose their totalitarian minds. Any manager who gets personally insulted by a worker leaving is deeply sick!
Me quitting is screwing you over? Damn bro sounds like you should have hired an adequate number of staff instead of a skeleton crew.
In my husband’s will there is a letter addressed to his mistress
Me (45) and my husband (42) had been married for 16 years. Not the best marriage. I worked day shift while he worked night shifts.
He cheated on me 2 times, but I always forgave him because it was in both cases a single encounter and when I found out snooping through his phone the text had stopped weeks before. (He had the habit to not delete any chat).
I wasn’t really active in the last year of our marriage cause I wanted kids before but he didn’t, stating that he still wanted to live child free and have fun without the responsibilities that comes with a child.
After I turned 39, my doctor confirmed that I couldn’t have children anymore, so I reduce our intimate life to one time every two months.
Four years ago, he cheated on me for the third time, but this time it was different. He met this girl extremely younger than him (she was almost 19 at the time, he was 38) whom I’ll call Lana (fake name).
They have been together for one year, when Lana realized that he was lying and the number he constantly received calls from wasn’t actually his sister like he said but was me, his wife.
So she memorized my number and one day she called me and told me what was going between them two. We also met one week after and she showed me all the text between them as proof, stating that she didn’t know he was married and that she had immediately cut contacts with him.
Those messages were particularly hurtful to read, because unlike those with the other two women, this wasn’t only physical but strongly emotional too.
He kept telling her how much he loved her, kept telling her that there was a ring coming for her and the most devastating, apparently he tried multiple times to get her pregnant but she didn’t want to be mum at 19.
After I confronted my husband with all the proofs, he broke down and admitted the affair, but unlike the other two where he cried and begged, this time he seemed way less remorseful.
I told him that I was willing to forgive him again but this time we had to do couple counseling. Two days after suddenly looks at me and tells me that he loves me, but loves her more and wants to separate and try to get her back since she had cut him out.
At that point I let all out and said many bad things to him and lay on the floor crying and screaming, in disbelief, asking myself how could I have wasted all these years and telling him I should have left him the first time I found out about his affair.
Angry as I was, I called my family and told them everything. Word spread quickly, as the next day he received a call from his family that made him come back to his senses.
He came clean, apologized with me and agreed to couple counseling. The next year seemed to go better, especially our intimate life. But I could still sense he wasn’t fully happy even though he told me the opposite.
One year and a half ago he was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer. I’m not gonna spare all the details, but this has been the worst year of my life. Seeing him this weak and sick had me crushed. He died one month ago and I’m devastated.
Last week there was a meeting to discuss his will. He left me and his sisters everything. Then the lawyer pulled out a letter titled “to the love of my life”, so I ask to handle it to me as I guessed it was directed to me.
But instead they told me that the letter was directed to Lana. My heart sank, I left the room and went to cry like a baby. After 10 minutes I composed myself and got back into the room.
I asked to give it to me so that I could call her and give It to her myself but, my husband had specifically request to organize a meeting with Lana to make sure she received the letter since he was sure that if I was the one who had to contact and give her the letter, she would have never received it (and he was right).
I don’t know what to do. I would like to ask to be present but at the same time I know that whatever is in that letter will hurt me deeply and right now I’m already devastated.
She was hiding the fact she is an alcoholic and constantly drunk, I grew to care about her a lot.
I unknowingly fell in love with a drunk basically.
I got her some help and her drinking has reduced significantly. The problem is the difference in her personality is night and day.
The sober her is a very boring person, it’s like talking to the wall.
I don’t enjoy being with her when she is sober. I also know if I leave she will start drinking.
Any advice? Should I leave?
Here are what netizens think:
Reduced significantly is not the same as sober. I can only speak from my experience but I was so much worse as an addict trying to reduce my intake and things finally made more sense once I quit for good. Any amount of drinking puts me back in that cycle and the only way to stop was to not start again.
If she’s full sober, things just take time to adjust and learn better coping mechanisms. For me, I drank heavily and hid it for 20 years, those habits don’t just erase themselves because you stop drinking.
You need to do what’s best for you and if the relationship isn’t working out then you shouldn’t stay. Focus on the issues of why the relationship isn’t working (or what does work) and stay away from sober vs not sober when you communicate with her about it.
