Dating someone much younger than you can be a daunting experience. I know because I’ve done it.

As a thirty-something woman, I recently went on a date with an eighteen-year-old guy who I found quite attractive. While I was initially hesitant, I quickly realized that age was just a number and that we had so much in common.

I met this young man through a mutual friend, and while I was initially hesitant to pursue anything further, I was intrigued by his confidence and charm.

I had never dated someone so much younger than me before, but I figured why not give it a shot? After all, people are attracted to each other for different reasons, and I was drawn to him because he was handsome, intelligent, and had a good sense of humor.

When we went on our first date, I was pleasantly surprised. We talked for hours and I found myself completely at ease with him. I was so surprised that I was able to have such an open and honest conversation with someone so much younger than me. We discussed our views on different topics, from politics to dating, and I found his perspective to be refreshing and insightful.

Despite our age difference, I realized that we had so much in common. We both enjoyed the same music, movies, and activities, and we had similar values and interests. I was amazed at how much we had in common and I couldn’t believe how comfortable I felt around him.

As our relationship progressed, I realized that our age difference was not a hindrance. In fact, it was quite the opposite. I was happy to be able to share my experiences and knowledge with him, while he was able to offer me a fresh and youthful perspective on life.

At the end of the day, I don’t mind dating someone so much younger than me because he is handsome. After all, age is just a number and it doesn’t define us. Everyone is different and has something unique to offer, so why not take a chance and explore the unknown?

I’m not sure where our relationship will go, but I’m enjoying the ride. I’m excited to see what the future holds for us and I’m thankful for the opportunity to explore the unknown. I don’t mind dating someone so much younger than me because he is handsome and I have found that there is more to relationships than just physical attraction. Age is just a number and I’m glad I took the chance to find out just how much we have in common.

A few weeks ago I got an unexpected text message from an old acquaintance. We hadn’t talked in a few years and I had no idea why she was reaching out. She said she had something really important to tell me, and wanted to meet up in person to discuss it.

At first, I assumed she wanted to catch up and catch up with me.

I hadn’t seen her since poly, and I was excited to see what she’d been up to all these years. But as I drove to the meeting place, my excitement quickly turned to suspicion.

When I arrived, I was greeted by a woman I didn’t recognize. She introduced herself as the friend’s business partner and said that my friend had asked her to meet me.

My suspicions were confirmed when she asked me to join her MLM company. She said it was an amazing opportunity and that I had a great chance of making a lot of money. She was very convincing and I almost said yes.

But then I remembered why I had gotten the text message in the first place. I asked her if my friend had sent her to ask me out on a date, and she admitted that it was a ruse. She said that my friend had asked her to pretend to ask me out so that she could try and sell me on her MLM company.

I was pissed off! I felt like a fool for believing that my old acquaintance wanted to catch up with me. I thanked the woman for her time, turned down her offer, and left.

As I drove home, I realized that I had been taken advantage of. Although the woman had been convincing in her sales pitch, I should have known better than to fall for it. I was angry with myself for not seeing through the ruse and disappointed that my old acquaintance had used me this way.

At the same time, I was also thankful that I hadn’t been scammed out of any money. I knew that if I had said yes, I could have easily been taken advantage of and lost a lot of money.

The other day I made a booking for a massage at a hotel in Kuala Lumpur. I had seen the photos of the masseuse and I thought it looked too good to be true. I was looking forward to a relaxing massage and I was expecting the woman in the photo to show up at the hotel.

Little did I know that the woman who showed up was completely different from the photo I had seen. She was almost twice the width and her arms were thicker than my legs. I couldn’t believe my eyes.

My first reaction was “BABI CB!!” knn one babi appeared.

It turns out that the massage parlour had sent me a different woman from the one in the photo. The woman standing in front of me was definitely not the one I had seen in the pictures. I was shocked and I couldn’t believe that this was the woman they had sent me.

I asked the woman what was going on and she told me that she was a “special service”. I had no idea what she was talking about and I was confused. She then explained to me that she was a “chicken” and that she was sent to me as a “special service”.

I was horrified and I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I was disgusted and I couldn’t bring myself to do anything with the woman.

The pimp who had sent her to me was trying to convince me to take her, but I refused and I asked him to leave.

I was so angry and disgusted that I left the hotel. I was appalled at the way they had treated me and I wanted to make sure that this kind of thing didn’t happen to anyone else.

I hope that my story serves as a warning to other people who are thinking of booking a massage in Kuala Lumpur.

Dishonest Phone Shops

Does anyone else buy their phones from Shopee sellers with SG local set?

Not sure if this is a norm, where they claim to provide 1 year warranty, but it is actually 1 year from the phone’s manufacture date instead of your purchase date.

I bought a phone from 8thavemobile from Shopee in March 2022, and today when I reached out to them as my phone is having an issue, they said my warranty was no longer valid as it started before my phone was bought… That means my phone effectively had only 9 months warranty.

When I clarified if they gave me a phone with less than 1 year warranty, all they could say was “apologies on the miscomm”.

Is this a normal thing for phones bought from non telco stores? Or was the seller just not honest and not transparent?

Netizens’ comments

1. If I buy electronics online, I only buy from official stores. The price from non official stores may be tempting but most of the time, it is not worth the trouble. During flash sales, sometimes the price at official store can be lower than these non official stores.
2. You should make a complaint to Shopee’s customer service helpline. They are usually pretty helpful. Document everything that was discussed between you and the seller, as well as the product listing page (check your order history).
3. You pay a price, I use to get angry about this type of nonsense and when I buy the cheap phones. Nowadays u need to know, why officially outlets are more expensive 🙂
4. Most likely they sold you a refurbished phone that someone else bought returned and the phone company flipped to Shopee seller. Warranty is not with phone supplier ie Samsung direct?
   If it is 1 year warranty with shoppee I would complain to them about the warranty it absolutely should be from purchase date and seller is. Con artist. This happened to me on Lazada and they gave me a full cash refund
5. Most of the time you do get a bargain of a few hundred dollars off. Gotta go with it with eyes wide open as most of these could be activated sets which are then resold back within days of buyers remorse.
6. Idk why people still buy phones from non-official retailers,so many things can go wrong and had gone wrong because people want to save a hundred dollars. End of the day everyone need to make money don’t expect a product to be cheap out of the kindness of their hearts. If you want to buy a cheap phone,buy a cheap phone, dont buy expensive phone then try to compromise for something cheaper.

Context is that I’m 22F student still studying and working part time, whose the sole provider for a household of 4. Household is made up of my mentally disabled mom, brother (16), and sister (8). Our father passed when I was 15, so I’ve been forced to work and provide since.

I’m so tired all the time, I hate living like this…the burden on my shoulder is so heavy…this isn’t the life I envisioned for myself. I hate having 3 dependents at such a young age, due to no fault of my own

To make matters worse, I work a job that pays me peanuts and I keep applying to full time positions in my degree but can never get past the interview stage…each rejection instils the fear that ill never get out of my home situation and will constantly collect crumbs to collect more crumbs

And if the above isn’t bad enough, my mums is planning to forcibly marry me off once I graduate. I come from one of those cultures where forced/arranged marriages are standard.

I’m dying to leave but it’s not so easy when you’re the sole provider. The odds are so stacked against me, my friends/advisers are always shocked that I’m still functioning and haven’t jumped off a bridge yet.

Netizens’ comments

1. This is an oxygen mask situation – you have to save yourself before you can save anyone else
2. When you say your mother is disabled, but is well enough to marry you off, i’m going to assume she has an abi or a personality disorder.
   You should leave, cut ties. The job can be the trigger for this- it will enable you to rent your own place.
   If you’re getting interviews you’ll eventually get the job. In general companies will only interview if you’re in the ballpark to get the job, otherwise its a waste of their time. See if you can get feedback where you’ve been unsuccessful to improve your interview technique.
   I know you’re only venting but the best advice i can give you is that no one is coming to save you. No one is going to make this situation better unless you decide to change it yourself
3. Well, for starters you have the option to say no. This isn’t the 1700s where you cant choose your own wedding. You dont have anything to lose.
4. The reality is, if you want to escape poverty you have to have some time when you aren’t saving everybody else so you can save yourself. You can’t do it with a person attacking you all the time. I helped out my mother a lot as I was building myself up, but she’s sweet and supportive. I would’ve had to keep some distance if she was holding me back.
   You have some work cut out for your here. But first get your mindset right….this is your life, your choice. You have the power because everybody needs you. Also, you deserve respect for your contributions.
   Decide if you want to continue to accommodate your mother at all. Obviously shut down the marriage thing. Put your foot down and set boundaries to give one last chance, be prepared to leave her behind.
   Based on your choice above, talk with your brother. You were 15 when you took over. He can step up now too. Be candid with him. It’s a shit situation and while you’re eldest, it’s not solely on you to make sure him and little sister are ok.
   If I were you, I’d attempt to take my siblings with me. It’s still a ton of responsibility, but if your brother is a teammate, it could actually feel a lot lighter.
   He can get a part time job and help you. If you decide you want to move on your own, then work with your brother beforehand to figure out if there are relatives they can move to.
   Then revisit your job hunting/career strategy and reconsider your location and behavior to reduce cost of living. You’re correct that getting the right salary is key.
   See a career counselor at school and get help—-spin up your resume the best you can, join career related clubs, and research what people who graduate with your degree do to get sufficient salaries.
   Do practice interviews or request feedback to figure out if there’s something you can do at the interview stage to have more success.
   My approach was to prepare of course so my answers were great, but also a lot of smiles and display of genuine interest/curiosity into the interviewer.
   Usually try to find a way to demonstrate I have something in common with the interviewer. I’ve even gone so far as to tell myself affirmations about the organization or role to get pumped up before hand. I think that positive energy is contagious—just don’t go too extreme and scare ppl. Lol
   Also keep your costs down.
   Watch out for any poverty traps (and warn your brother)— bad debt, loser friends and romantic interests that harm you financially, babies you can’t afford, etc. You have no safety net so step carefully.
   Finally do your best to find joy in your life. Treat yourself when you can. Find a way to have a mini-escape for at least 30 min everyday.
   Whatever you can to rejuvenate yourself because this is a marathon.
   When you drop your mom, I think that will probably make the biggest difference. That and when you land your job—which is only a matter of time.

Smoke breaks for non smokers

I’m a non smoker & I now work with a lot of smokers. Guess who is always stuck not getting these extra breaks? me.

Im in training so When I need help, they’re always outside. I wouldn’t mind if it was equal but it’s not. Maybe I’ll go on a lonely outdoor break & watch them lose their minds. I can’t actually join them because I’m allergic to cigarette smoke. I’m just so sick of this double standard.

Netizens’ comments

1. I worked in an office like this. I would announce I was “going out on a smoke break”, take a walk and get a snack. This took about the same time all of the smokers took for a smoke break. Because I phrased it as going on a smoke break nobody dared challenge me.
2. At one former job of mine, we were allowed two fifteen minute breaks per day. Smokers however, would take smoke breaks every twenty minutes or so. They probably put in maybe 10 actual minutes of work in a given hour– 15 tops.
3. I worked in a warehouse, everyone I worked with would go out to the smoking area and have a smoke, then another would join and they would talk, and light up another one and so on… after about a month I started following them and going outside and standing around and talking as they did I just didn’t smoke, The manager who smoked and was often out there questioned why I was out there and I flat out said if you’re on break I’m on break. He never said another word.
4. As a smoker, I tell all the new hires to just tell management they’re going for a smoke break. Everybody deserves a few minutes outside. You don’t need to smoke, go out there and eat carrot sticks and watch the clouds. But if they’ll give me 5 minutes, no reason they can’t give it to the non-smokers, too.
5. I’ve seen plenty of stories of people who buy a single pack and just lean against the building holding the unlit cigarette as a “smoke break”
6. I was the only non-smoker in my department at work and my boss INSISTED I take extra breaks to level out my co workers smoke breaks. He wanted me to outside at first with them, but when I told him I got sick from the smell he told me I could just chill in the back.
   If you don’t have a boss that respects this I wouldn’t respect the boss.

How can I (M25) tell my wife (F23) that I can’t keep up with her libido anymore?

My Wife (F23) and I (M25) got married 2 weeks ago. Were currently on our honeymoon and have one week left. We’ve been together for 2.5 years.

Both of us had jobs where we travelled a lot, so we saw each other at random intervals. E.g. 2 weeks one month, then nothing for a month, and then every weekend etc.

After 8 months, she got a new job that didn’t require her to travel as much, but we still didn’t want to jump head first, so she rented a place for 6 months, then we moved in with each other.

During the first 8 months we slept together every time we saw each other. Like A LOT! But it was new and exciting and we didnt see each other that often.

When she moved, we slept at each others place about every other night and hooked up at least twice a day. It was a lot, but I enjoyed it.

Then we moved in together and I just assumed it would either be the same amount spread out or less. But it increased. At least 10-14 times a week. Sometimes more.

We’re currently on our honeymoon and I think my D is going to fall off. Christ that woman has astronomical desires in bed. Also my jaw is hurting from going down so much, to give my D a break.

I love her, and we’re great communicators generally, but how do I tell my wife I need a break without hurting her feelings? I’m afraid she’s going to have a negative response. Or almost blame herself for not stopping before, or not seeing any clues.

She’s a people pleaser with everyone else, and I’m afraid she’s going to feel bad for forcing me to do it this much. And that is definitely not what’s been happened. I just can’t keep going at this tempo.

Any tips?

I (21F) hooked up with a boy (24M). He came but didn’t allow me to shower at his place. Advices?

We didn’t plan it, but he came heavily on me. So I really needed a shower to clean my upper body. He refused because it was “only a hookup” and handled me some tissue.

I cleaned a little but I was very upset because I had to wear my dress on dirty skin, so I have to wash it now. Also coming back home smelling like come is not good.

The date instead was good and except this he was really good with me all the night. I was planning to meet him again, but this is making me reconsider it.

Personal experience or advices?

Netizens’ comments

1. Sounds like he’s not planning on seeing you again anyway, tbh. I’m sure you can find a guy to sleep with that treats people with basic decency and respect.
2. I wouldn’t see this one again. It’s called basic decency.
3. He can come on you but not let you use his shower to clean up his stuff? Wtf? I wouldn’t want to see someone like this again, not worth your time.
4. He treated you well before sleeping with you then he treated you horribly after that. Why would you want to see a guy that treats you badly at all?
   Have more respect for yourself even when it’s just a hookup. Basic human decency should be a minimum bar for seeing a person again. Your hookup failed that bar.
5. Don’t get back with him, even hookups deserve respect, and he couldn’t give you the minimum. Like, how long do you have to date to get showering privileges? That’s really disgusting and he needs to learn how to treat people better. You didn’t deserve that disrespect. If the date was great except the amount of disrespect it ended on, that counts as part of the date. You can do better.
6. He showed you his true colors once he got what he wanted. Don’t waste your time and energy on a guy who can’t be bothered to let you take a quick 5 minute shower after you were vulnerable and trusting with your body to him.

A job from 16 years ago called me to ask me to come back

Today was a delightful treat. I got a notification on social media with a new dm. Pop it open.

It was a manager from a job I had 16 years ago. I recognized the name. It was a short paragraph. ‘Hey, how’s it going? Hope you’re well’ etc etc. It got to the point pretty quickly.

Imagine my surprise when they asked me if I would be interested in coming back to work for them again since I had been ‘so good’ in that role when I had first worked there.

Ya’ll. 16 years ago. 16 years

It was a restaurant that I worked at during the school holidays. They asked me to come back and work cashier as a fnb worker.

I’m 30+ years old, my guy. I literally run my own crew in my own department. I could demote myself to the base position with my employer and still make more. But sure! Yep! Let me just give all this up for some juicy crappy salary, inhumane shifts, overtime because so-and-so no-showed again. No problem.

Yeah. Hard pass.

I’m sure they’ll just continue to take this tremendous rejection as further proof that ‘no one wants to work’.

Netizens’ comments

• That must have felt great knowing that you made such an impression on them they thought of you 16 years later… but not as great as getting the chance to tell them “hell no!”.
• Similar thing happened to me. I’m retired but, my first “real”job reached out to me over the weekend. It was strange.
• It is a good feeling when you tell a former employer who is asking you to come back, “You can’t afford me.”
• Tell them that your skillset has improved since leaving and you might consider a board level position.
• HR at my company has been doing some weird internal recruiting like that lately. They were getting hard up for people for this one department, and they started reaching out to people who used to work in that department, asking if they want to come back. I don’t know if they reached out to former employees, but they did ask at least 2 current employees who had been promoted to other departments, if they want to go back to a job that sucks, and pays like half as much as they’re making in their current position.

I (30M) am considering ending my relationship with my partner (26F) due to her $250,000 in debt..

l am a 30 year old male. I have a well paying job (roughly 100k per year). No debt.

My girlfriend has 250k in private loans for her studies for a private degree with a variable interest rate, not sure what exactly she’s studying but a quarter of a million dollars? How could it amount to so much.

With how fast it is growing… she will need to put 25k a year into it just to keep it in the same place. That basically guarantees that I will never have financial help during our relationship. Additionally, with how much she will need to work just to pay on the loans..

I won’t have much help around the house or with our kids (if/when we have some) either.

I keep blaming myself that I can’t just deal with it.. it’s just money right? But at the same time when I look at the reality of the situation I can’t help but feel I need to walk away from this situation.

Additionally, she is going back to school for a higher paying job (probably 60-85k income at the end realistically with the possibility of 125k a year if she works herself to death) but this program will add another ~30k in loans. I think this is a bad decision..but it’s also the only option she seems to have to up her income.

I feel like I don’t want to wait until I’m 45 when this debt (might) be paid off to have children.. I don’t want to put my life on hold in this way, but I also love her a lot. We’ve talked a lot about this and about k. plan to pay it down etc.

It now feels like my options are either accept that this is reality and it will be many years before she’s free if this debt.. or end the relationship.

Any advice?

Wanted to give an update. After reading all your comments and picking up a book about decision making in regards to money and love (will share of interested). I have come to the decision that I do, sadly, need to end the relationship.

She is a wonderful girl and honestly my best friend, but the reality of her choices financially will alter the course of my life in such a profound way that all I can see is resentment in the end. I have to stop guilting myself into sacrificing myself for others to the point of my own mental turmoil.

Thank you all for the advice. It really helped me see that either choice is okay to make and I’m not a failure for saying it’s too much for me.

Netizens comments

1. She can’t afford to go back to school….
2. Can’t afford not to either, sounds like.
3. She’s basically financially enslaved for life.
4. My brother was in your exact same situation and married her, saddling himself with her debts. They don’t have much in savings. He’s gone back to school for accounting to find a better job that will pay more (he was previously a pastor). She has a bachelor’s degree in social work and can’t do much with it, so she’s working with disabled and troubled children doing fairly dangerous work with little to no hazard pay. I don’t know how happy their marriage actually is, but I can tell you he doesn’t want to have kids right now because he feels like they literally can’t afford another mouth to feed. He’s constantly stressed. I worry about him. From the outside looking in, I don’t know that he’s done the best thing for himself or for her. I don’t know that she’ll be happy unless she can be the pastor’s wife with at least three kids, and I doubt he’ll be happy working himself so hard and stressing over money all the time. His life partner is not my decision to make, but I can at least provide you with commentary about a couple that was in a similar situation to yourself so you have more info.