My friend involved in this suggested I post here and make my case lol so here we go. I live in a small old HDB estate and everyone knows everyone else’s business. Last weekend a lot of my friends (mutual friends still with my ex) went to my ex BFs baby shower and they have been talking about it all this week.

I’m so tired of hearing about it. He completely cut off contact with me when we split and we haven’t talked in like 6 years so I feel people should know better than to bring him up around me. I’ll admit at the end of our relationship I wasn’t my best self and did do something a bit extreme so I understand why things ended and why he wants no contact but I also think a lot of his actions drove me to it and I did apologise but it’s left things awkward.

One thing was a bit into our relationship he became a “competitive” gamer and it was impossible to live with. He was always travelling for “tournaments” and “practice” and stuff and yes I’m talking about video games, not a sport. When he was home he streamed so he was literally just always on the computer. I was lucky to get a few hours a day for him to just watch TV with me.

Today a friend was again talking about the shower and I just said I hoped he had his computer addiction dealt with because if not from experience I feel bad for his wife and coming kid. Another friend pointed out it’s essentially his job and him being able to be flexible and work from home is good and apparently him and his new wife game together.

The friend who brought up the baby shower told me not to be bitter and that saying he was addicted to something (even though I didn’t imply like drugs I just said the computer) could be really bad and I need to watch what I say but I just said the truth.

I think if they don’t want my opinion on him and his life they should stop bringing him up to me.

Here are what netizens think:

• It’s literally his job. Also it’s been 6 years – you need to move on

• This is call the typical cannot taste the grapes then tell people the grapes sour

• Kpo sampat, move on la

My dad wants me to start wearing a bra around the house

I (18F) stopped wearing bras around the house around 2 years ago. I didn’t like coming home from school and feeling that thing around my back and chest.

Now my dad is saying that I need to wear a bra. My mom says that “He’s a man, it’s distracting, he doesn’t need to see his daughters like that.”

As if I’m walking around completely topless. I just want to be comfortable, is that wrong? I feel like my body is something that needs to be censored and covered up all the time even at home.

He says that if my chest were smaller I could get away with it but I can’t because I have a larger chest. It’s really frustrating.

To address some things

My dad isn’t the one who actually told me my chest is distracting, my mom was. Out of both of them, my mom is the more conservative of the two of them.

She has a lot of bigoted ideals, my not wearing a bra is just one of her many gripes with some things I do.

And another thing, please stop calling my dad a creep. I know how the post sounds, but I think it’s more of him being conditioned to be repulsed by his daughter’s body. but it is still very frustrating to be told to strap on a bra when I’m trying to relax.

So I met her around a year and a half ago and we hit it off pretty well, great chemistry and and all that.

The problem is that every 10 days or so (can’t keep track), she’s absurdly nasty to me. To give a couple of examples, I went to the doctor a couple of weeks ago and it seems I have low testosterone. One day at night, I said I’d start taking the medication and she says: Great, maybe you’ll finally become a man.

Other times, I was chilling on the couch after work (8-17), she shows up, says that I work too little and that there was once a diplomat that had a thing for her that made much more money. She sometimes also mentions some hurtful stuff like I made her some food and she randomly mentions she once hooked up with a random guy from a bar.

These are only a couple, there’s plenty more. Whenever I try to say anything, she usually says it’s just a joke and that I am too sensitive or blames it on her periods and that she likes this kind of banter. Afterwards, when I tell her my feelings,she sends me a huge wall of text saying she loves me, appreciates me, is feeling like shit and that she will try to change.​

Now I’m starting to get kinda crazy on debating whether I really am too sensitive or if this is abusive and like most cases, I can’t grasp it.

Not sure if it’s relevant but I live by myself and she lives with her mother.

Here are what netizens think:

• I have a rule that took me WAY too long to learn – just because people are going through, doesn’t mean they are allowed to take it out on people around them. You’re worth better than that, your feelings are valid. Don’t put up with it.

• She does have mental health issues, she should at minimum apologize when you point out she’s been hurtful. If she doesn’t take your feelings seriously even when you talk to her in a “good” phase that’s pretty red flag-ey.

• If she’s really having cycles where she behaves differently she might have mood disorder issues? I have that (although I get depressive cycles

• You’re not too sensitive. She’s being straight up mean. Instead of saying “you’ll finally become a man,” after getting your meds, imagine if she was curious about them or was excited for the both of you or she just gave you a hug or ANYTHING besides being very mean and cutting about it.

• She’s using that as an excuse to say or do whatever she want.

I tried to terminate my pregnancy the entire 9 months

I never wanted kids ever, at the beginning of my relationship I specifically told my boyfriend I don’t want kids. Soon after I ended up pregnant at first I was happy but over time I started to panic and think awful things.

I scheduled an appointment to get an abortion but I was too far along and it couldn’t be done. I planned everything out I bought a small jewelry box as a casket for my baby, I wrote and rehearsed a lie about having a miscarriage.

I looked up ways to terminate a pregnancy at home, pills I could take, throwing myself down stairs. Yes I did, I even purposely fell on my stomach, laid flat on my back, starved myself.

After everything, he was still alive and perfect, after a while I stopped and went into a downward spiral and I still am. I was hoping something went wrong and he would be stillborn.

Now 4 months later I still have these thoughts I miss my old life, I miss sleeping all night, going out with friends, staying out all night I miss my old life.

I feel trapped, and I can never escape this life but I do love my son so much. When I look at his cute smile and the way he looks at me I think about all the things I did and it makes me cry, I look at him and I apologize all the time.

He is healthy and a happy baby but apart of me still wishes I went to the clinic sooner. I know what I did was wrong and I hate myself for it now. I’m sorry if this is to triggering to read but this is my confession.

So I’m thinking of getting myself an adult toy.

I’m a V, never really fingered myself (typing these things feels so taboo right now) but I want to start having fun with myself, to like, practise for the real thing, I guess.

I have looked up the type of lube I want to use, and now I’m onto looking at penetrative toys…. but they’re all really long and really thick.

I’m too scared to start with a really thick, long one. I know it will be painful and won’t fit, I’m really super terrified of getting hurt or hurting myself.

Can any of you ladies recommend me a small, thin toy that is safe and not hurtful for beginners?

Netizens comments

1. whatever you do, don’t force it! i bought one without doing much research and it didn’t fit.
   i was so frustrated. then i looked it up and there were suggestions to relax, take your time, and don’t force it. after a couple days it went in fine.
2. make sure to look at the dimensions for girth. If it is longer than you want/need, you don’t have to use all of the insertable length, but if it’s too wide then you can’t do much about that.
   Look at the material too, since many toys (often ones that are really cheap) are not body safe.
3. Don’t make yourself crazy about “getting ready” for the first time. Explore yourself and find out what feels good where. Also don’t set a high bar for yourself.
   
   What a dumb F, losing your V to a piece of plastic

So my aunt is going on a trip in a couple of weeks.

She has 3 dogs, a lab, a chocolate lab and a poodle. She asked me to dog sit at her house for a week. The problem is all her dogs are one year old so they’re pretty much puppies.

I don’t have the best experience with dogs, i have one but she’s always been a very calm dog her whole life.

All my aunt’s dogs are super hyper and not very well trained. They’re so much work as i’ve heard and i just don’t think i can handle it.

I told her that and she asked me to reconsider. She said she’d pay me $400. I strongly reconsidered after that but once again i just don’t think i could handle it.

I told her sorry but no again. She called my mom afterward and tried to make my mom make me dog sit.

My mom told me that she called again and said she was desperate. I told her to just find someone else and she said she can’t find someone in such short notice.

My mom told me i was being a little selfish for telling my own aunt no. We left it at that.

Last night my aunt called me again and said that she’s reconsidering me as a dog sitter but she’s lowering the price to 300.

I told her that i said no was my final answer and she said that she’s going to have to cancel her trip because of me and my “irresponsibility”.

Usually i wouldn’t feel bad but she was looking toward to this trip apparently

I’ve been dating “A” for 7 1/2 months, and we’ve been exclusive since the beginning. Everything was going well, and it’s the healthiest relationship that I’ve ever been in. We never fought and always treated each other with respect. Sex was great too.

I was more than a year out of a very long relationship when we got together, and I’ve moved on. My ex and I are on friendly terms, but there are no feelings there, at least on my side. But A ended his most serious relationship only 2 months before we met. It sounded like it was toxic and they broke up and got together many times before parting ways. I had a feeling that he wasn’t over her, but it didn’t seem to be a problem for our relationship. I fell in love with him and felt safe and cared for with him.

We met up on Sunday to celebrate Valentine’s Day since I had to work on Monday, and when I walked in I could tell something was off. He said he was really depressed, which I suspected he had been for a while. But he also said that his ex contacted him over the weekend and that it really hit him that he’s not over her. And it made him realize that there is something missing in our relationship. At the same time, he said he cares about me a lot, and does have feelings for me – but they are not the same as his feelings toward her.

I asked if he wants to get back with her and he said he doesn’t know. I asked if he wanted to see me again or to end our relationship that night, and he said he wanted to see me again. I thought we could both use time apart and suggested we meet up this weekend to talk about it.

But I don’t know what to do, and my thoughts are all over the place. I can’t sleep and I can’t eat. I’ve given him nothing but love and treated him well. It hurts so much that he can’t realize what a great thing we have together because he’s still in love with someone who never treated him well (per his own words). At the same time, I know that he didn’t give himself time to get over her when we started dating, and that this is why we’re in this situation now.

I know I probably need to walk away from him for my sanity and let him figure out his life. I feel like if I do walk away, or if he wants to end it, I need to close the door on this relationship permanently and move on, so I don’t end up obsessing over him like he’s doing with his ex.

But I still find myself wanting to try to see if he can somehow work on getting over her while still being with me, if I give him space to feel his feelings for her without judgment or anger, and time to heal. Is that just doomed to fail?

A woman shared how her sister is “engaged” to her ex-boyfriend as encouraged by their father to spite her and her mother.

Here is the story

Hi everyone this is a little complicated. I’m 24f. My parents (44f and 51m) divorced when I was 14. My dad was having an affair, I caught him with the other woman and told my mom about it. He’s hated my mom and me ever since.

My sister (18 now) was seven at the time of the divorce and he started using her as a pawn. He’d tell her lies about me and my mom so she wouldn’t want to live with my mom (he told my sister me and my mom were going to throw away all of her toys, he got her a dog and told her if she stayed over my mom’s house nobody would feed the dog and it would starve) so because of this my sister has wanted to live with my dad since they divorced, and her relationship with me and my mom is pretty strained.

When I was 16 I started dating a guy who was 24. I was with him for three years, I finally left him after he put me in the emergency room for the third time. I just left with my car and the clothes I had on in the ER, I left everything else and drove back to my moms house.

Now my sister announced on social media she’s engaged to him. My mom called my sister furious. She said she’s been dating him for over a year now and my father new about the relationship and encouraged it. She told my mom she was 18 now, (she just turned 18 two weeks ago) it was too late and she couldn’t do anything about it.

My mother talked to my father who basically said for me and my mom to eff off, that he doesn’t blame Alexander for putting me in the hospital and “hopes he does it again if I don’t shut up”. My dad admitted to purposely not telling my mom about my sister dating him, to keeping in contact with him and letting him stay over the house with my sister alone for years, he’s allowing all of this just to spite me and my mom.

Is there any talking sense into either of them?