I just caught my boyfriend making out with his guy best friend

Throwaway because I may honestly delete this. All names are fake but honestly if he finds this I honestly wouldn’t care.

I’m 20, my (ex) boyfriend (Jacob) is 21. His friend (Jace) is 20. They have been best friends sincE school. I’ve been dating Jacob for about a year and half at this point.

I went out with friends last night and my boyfriend had said that Jace was coming over to “chill”. I was fine with that, hadn’t been the first time he had come over. Well one of my friends had ended up in a pretty bad fight so we all left early. I didn’t tell my boyfriend that I was coming back so soon. Didn’t think it would matter yknow?

So I open the door, and I’m confused cause it’s dark as hell in the apartment. The lights were off so I couldn’t see all that well but I saw and heard 2 people on the floor. I turned the light on and lo and behold my boyfriend and his friend are making out. Both are clearly drunk as shit and didn’t even realize the lights were on at that point. I just froze. I didn’t know how to process what I was seeing.

I yelled at Jacob to get up and get out. Both of them jump up and immediately started trying to explain the situation but at that point I was crying and trying to block everything out. Jace grabbed his stuff and ran out to his car while my boyfriend was trying to hug and comfort me.

I pushed him away and locked myself in the bathroom. I heard him cussing and throwing stuff around, but eventually he slammed the front door and that’s how I knew he left.

I’m currently at a friends house. I’ve been bombarded with texts from Jacob threatening me if I dare tell anyone what happened. My friend already knows but it’s not like I was planning to tell everybody?

Now that I type this all out it sounds crazy. Don’t know if I’m looking for advice. Just need to get this out.

So I grew up very sheltered and was raised by a very strict and terribly prude single mother who never re-partnered. I didn’t even get told about periods.

So when I moved out, due to my naivety, being a people pleaser and having no street smarts, I was taken advantage of a lot. And so, I have slept with about 20 different men. I have since learnt the hard way and grown up.

Fast forward to now. I’ve discussed pasts with my boyfriend recently, I guess I wanted to have open communication. Well, he took it as me being proud of “collecting numbers”.

I also overshared details and it’s ruining our relationship. He has become very jealous and insecure, thinking I’m constantly scouting out new (and past) hookups. As if I want to sleep with literally any man who walks past or is in my vicinity (including the neighbours).

It’s making me feel absolutely disgusting. I am really starting to hate myself and everything about my past. And on top of that, he no longer “feels special” (even though he so is).

And then anytime he drinks (he has a drinking problem) he brings up everything I told him, his disgust in me, and hyperfixtates specifically on one incident where I had slept with a man about 10 years ago (saying things like “how can I respect you if you don’t respect yourself” (I am very sorry to anyone who finds this offensive). He also says that when we are doing anything intimate, all he can think about is all the others that have been inside of me.

Is there any going back from this? Do I avoid ever telling anybody about anything to do with the past ever again? I feel so gross and dirty and I just want the feeling to go away and for my boyfriend to not see me this way.

I received a Ouija board as a gift. Yes, a Ouija board! Before anyone scoffs at this gift, it was considered “a game” and sold at Toys R Us and some kids like being scared and that was us.

Anyway, I had a sleepover with friends after receiving it and we all used it and of course nothing happened because it’s just a game, right?

Well, a few weeks went by and my best friend was staying the night. We had dinner and some ice cream inside coffee mugs.

We were sitting on my bed, and when we finished with the ice cream, we decided to play with the Oujia board.

We placed our mugs on the floor right next to the bed and started messing with the board. Nothing ever really happened. But it was just exciting to be a little scared.

When we were ready for a break, I reached down to grab the mugs.

I immediately froze when I realized that not only were the spoons not in the mugs, they were next to the mugs both broken at the neck.

I started crying and took everything to my mom. She took the game away and I never saw it again.

Still gives me goosebumps to this day. I just can’t think of anything that would have caused the spoons to break. It’s something I don’t really like to think about.

Do you have a story?

Feeling suffocated in Singapore lately

I’m one of those Singaporeans who genuinely loves Singapore and appreciates our country despite its flaws and shortcomings. While my friends say they’d run and flee the country if war breaks out, I’d be one of those who’d stay and fight. I went to a local uni, studied extremely hard, started working this year, drink a cup of teh c everyday, and appreciate the relationships and things I have that others may not. I travel once or twice every year and have always come back to SG each time with a sense of appreciation for the food and things we get to enjoy.

Yet for the first time ever, I am experiencing feelings of suffocation after coming back from an overseas trip. The walkways feel smaller, housing feels meagre, our education system feels rigid, and SG as a whole just feels that much more constrained. I’m referring, in this case, to the amount of land, diversity of geographic features, things to do, types of people that we come across, and etc. There’s a sudden urge for me to get out and live somewhere bigger and have new experiences and meet people from different backgrounds and cultures and see how things could be better (or worse) and perhaps stray a little from the conventional Singaporean path.

Now I’m able to relate a bit better to people who express the desire to leave the country or change things here or simply want to be able to experience something different. It hit me that if a Singaporean like me can feel this way then I can imagine how many others do too.

Wondering what are your thoughts and if you share the same sentiments then is there anything you’re doing about it with regards to how you live your life.

I found out that my husband and his ex gf shared a bed together

I’m livid. I feel sick. I feel so betrayed.

It all begun last year. It’s a long story but I(30F) let my husband (35M) stayed at his ex gf (33F) apartment.

They were childhood friends before they started dating. When I met her a couple of years ago, I thought she’s really nice. People describe her as the nicest person, a good friend and has a good sense of humor. They say she’s very honest and incapable of lying. Needless to say, we eventually became friends and trusted her with all my heart.

Last year, I had to go on a business trip for a few months. My husband (fiance at that time) share an apartment but since I’m working overseas for a couple of months, we decided to have him stay at his parents until I’m back.

Weeks after I left, my husband, Sam (not his true name) called me asking me if he could stay with Rebecca (his ex, not her true name) as she’s desperately looking for a roommate but can’t find any. At that point, all I said was, “But aren’t we trying to save money?”. He told me Rebecca isn’t looking for a roommate because of the rent. She just don’t want to be alone in her apartment. I honestly haven’t thought that it’s weird because they were ex lovers but somehow it made me a little uncomfortable. She lives in a 1-br apartment. Like, where is he going to sleep? He explained she has a couch etc. I told him that it’s fine with me. I trust both of them but I only have one condition: They will never share a bed. He laugh and said “Of course babe”.

The entire time Sam stayed at Rebecca’s, they never really made me feel I couldn’t trust them. They would video call me, we’d play games online etc. it was fun. Rebecca would also call me sometimes just to chat. We talk about make up, her tinder date encounters, and some other stuff that doesn’t involve my husband.

One night I was feeling homesick and called Sam but he wouldn’t respond so I called Rebecca. She answered the call. The minute she picked up I could hear another person in the background that sounded like they just woke up. I can’t tell if it’s Sam but it’s a guy. Rebecca put me on hold for a bit. I honestly felt something is off that time but decided to brush it off. I asked her where Sam is, and she said he’s sleeping. I asked her where and she said on the couch. I was like, okay… we ended up talking instead. I felt better and almost forgot about it.

Fast forward to last week, Sam and I met up with his friends, including Rebecca, for a Christmas party. Everyone is having fun, getting drunk, then suddenly Rebecca asked me how I’m able to sleep when my husband snores too loud. And before I can answer, Sam said “wow, at least I don’t sleep weird.” Then he showed everyone a photo of her on the bed in weird sleeping position. What bothers me is in the photo, you can tell someone laid next to her… Blanket was a mess and there’s a shirt on the bedside table. A shirt I recognized…

I was shocked and left the party without saying anything. I went to my parents and stayed there til Christmas. My husband and Rebecca were calling me non-stop asking where I am. I am lucky my parents didnt tell them I was with them. They also didnt ask me what happened.

I didn’t talk to anyone what happened until Christmas. I asked my husband and Rebecca to go to my parents. That’s when I asked them to tell me the truth. At first they deny that they slept in one bed the entire time, but eventually they admit they did but nothing happened.

I was so mad. I’ve never been so mad my entire life. I feel so betrayed. I threw the gifts I bought for them on their face and asked them to leave.

Until now I’m not talking to them. My mom said I should talk to them and let them explain but I dont think it’ll change anything. I don’t think I can trust those motherfuckers again.

I dont know what to do at this point. You know what’s worse? I might be pregnant. I’m delayed which never happened before. I have so much on my plate right now. FML.