Little backstory, I’ve never really had a girlfriend, only a one night stand. Even in that scenario it took a while to get hard but eventually it worked, was a bit awkward though. I also purposely did NOT come for the 4 days before that, just to make sure I am actually “starved”.

So, last week I walked in one of those places in germany (a professional one not a random street girl) and instantly said to her that I was a bit nervous and just talked with her a bit, because normally being honest about that works whenever I’m nervous for things. She was really nice and said it’ll be fine. So I took off my clothes and she started sucking it. Nothing really happened which made me feel like shit. Like, it stayed flacid. There’s a woman blowing me, and it does nothing….

After 20 mins of her trying, it stayed soft but i didn’t care. Money wasn’t an issue for me since I got a bonus and never spent it anyway.

It took long for it to go erect again, and again we tried doggy but It slipped and hurt pp and it went down again (yes I’m that unlucky). Literally trying like that for over an hour but eventually I gave up since it wouldn’t go up anymore, and the one time it did it was for like a minute. I just wish I could have performed more than 3 minutes. She even told me “It’s so weird because it looked like you really wanted to”

I feel ashamed, I even apologized to her but she felt really bad for me. She also said this usually doesn’t happen, and I could tell she really felt bad for just by her look. She kissed my cheek and we waved goodbye.

In one way I’m happy that we at least did it, even for 3 minutes, but I’m so embarrassed that i couldn’t get hard no matter how hard she sucked it. And the rare times I did it refused to stay hard. Like, there’s a beautiful lady right there, even letting me touch her, why can’t it stay hard like it does all the time when nobody is around. Wtf is wrong with me man

My family grew up with no maid, but recently there’s been an illness in the family and we had to get a helper for my parent because the other parent is working, and both my sibling and I work full time.

I’m not used to a stranger in my space 24/7 (I wfh and usually home on the weekends/PH), and through no fault of her own, I find myself getting super annoyed she’s in my space. I am not comfortable with having this stranger close to me, touching my stuff (even though it’s kind of her job to help around the house when that parent does not need attention), needing assurances from me, getting close with me on my bed when I’m trying to rest, etc.

I find myself being so possessive of my bed, food, etc, and I’m sure she bathes but I keep smelling her bad breath and the fact that she sweats outside and then lay down on my bed makes me irrationally mad.

Obviously I don’t make my displeasures known, I just keep quiet and try to get away when I can, but seriously man, how do you guys who have maids handle a stranger all up in your space all the time.

Oh, sorry if unclear. Our place has four bedrooms, one my parents, one for me, one for my sibling, the other used for study/office.

She sleeps on an air mattress in my parents room because the arrangement is that she’s here for my parent since they are not mobile from the illness. When they wake up at night to go toilet, she’s supposed to help, etc. All this has been cleared with her and agency during interview process. We’ve asked her during interview if she’s ok with this sleeping arrangement in front of agent since if she has her own room, she can’t hear when my parents calls, and she says it’s good with her.

During the day sometimes I like to chill on my bed, so she will come to my bed to lay down beside me which I really don’t like but can’t chase her away because she don’t have privacy in other parts of the house.

my girlfriend is too hot, and I keep busting immediately…

I’m super down right now. I can’t satisfy my girlfriend.

It always just ends in barely putting it in, and then I panic and fluids go everywhere, and I’m apologizing like some kind of gardener tending to plants.

I know I’m better than most of you already, but I just wonder if there isn’t something more out there for me – like someone who loves me for me.

Netizens’ comments

But as someone who actually struggled with feelings around this I just thought I’d share on the off chance this is real and just a creative way to talk about your feelings

With my ex I would usually finish very quickly (this is very normal especially if you’re a bit younger like me), and that really shouldn’t be and wasn’t an issue. Tbh I personally felt like I could satisfy her in other ways better. However she would always be super disappointed, and would make that clear, when I came, which I now realize I definitely should have told her wasn’t great. It would become a thing where I literally apologized the very moment I came. The point of orgasm should be pleasurable, not a moment of shame and apology, that is entirely backwards.

There’s definitely more to say and I could elaborate based on my own experiences but this is something that I know realize has actually stuck with me and harmed the way I feel about intimacy and busting quick. The first time with my new gf I came quite unexpectedly during foreplay, and she was just happy for me and I was struck by feeling ‘Whaaat, so this is what a proper response should feel like’ . I also now manage to last way longer with her, which is probably completely unrelated but could be connected.

This is why I just wanted to tell you to break this pattern of thinking. Of course it doesn’t have to be over because you finish, and if this post is real then it definitely sounds like you have some bad habits of thinking about orgasms. It’s not healthy to feel that way and you shouldn communicate this to whomever you’re playing tennis with and figure out a way to make yourself more relaxed about this, which will result in a batter game of tennis for both of you

I’m tired of being shamed for dating a woman half my age

I’m closing in on 50, I’ve had a variety of normal and alternative relationships to put it mildly. I was married for around 20 years, now divorced. I have 4 kids, sole custody.

I’ve dated women my age, enjoyed their company a great deal, but I have an extremely high libido and I’ve only been able to find my match in this by poly dating or dating much younger.

I am currently dating a graduate student, in my field, upper 20’s. She’s not half my age, but effectively close enough. We’ve been dating for 8 months and so far everything is going great. We are intimate once or twice a day, sometimes more often. We spend a lot of time talking, going out, just snuggling together. We are both really happy.

My family treats me like I’m a predator. Her family isn’t happy either, but she dated mostly women before me and her homophobic parents are mildly happy she’s dating a man at the moment. She’s not close with any of them, but it upsets her they are judging her.

I’m just sick and tired of people who are miserable single and miserable married sitting here judging two people who are happy living their life. Yeah, it could go badly in the future, but that’s true for every relationship. People just need to mind their own business and let us enjoy our lives.

My husband wants to divorce me over nail polish

I was painting my nails in my office room and he came in and asked me why it smelled like nail polish. I told him I had been doing my nails just a few minutes ago, and he flipped out on me. He said they were bad for me because they were toxic, and that I wasn’t allowed to talk to him anymore. He promptly went to his man cave (aka his office) and shut the door on my face.

I opened the door and explained that my nails are my choice, and that I am a fashion – oriented woman who loves to look nice. Nails and lip gloss/lipstick are a big part on that. (Don’t get me started on the lipgloss, that’s a whole other issue he has a problem with.) I said I wouldn’t stop doing my nails because I want to look pretty.

This is an ongoing problem for us. His argument is that it’s toxic and it smells bad. I honestly don’t smell whatever it is he smells. He told me to go outside and do them in the patio. I find this request ridiculous because I’m working right now and I was just doing my nails on my down time, since I don’t have time to go outside to do my nails, and I’d have to wait every Saturday morning to do them.

I feel like he’s trying to control me, and this is such a stupid hill to die on. He should try to understand me too.

The worst thing is that we just bought a house and I thought all was going well. We hadn’t had any issues lately, and he said the word “divorce” out of nowhere.

I think it all boils down to the fact that I always end up doing whatever he wants me to because I don’t want to cause issues, and I am tired of having to hide it when I do my nails. It’s my house and I should be able to do whatever I want in my house.

I don’t think this this is normal. But I love my husband and I don’t want to lose him over something so stupid. I just want him to understand I am not doing my nails for him, but rather for myself. This is important to me.

I would feel butt ugly if I had no lip stick or nail polish on. I wish he could understand how I feel. I can put myself in his shoes but he can’t do the same for me. It’s all just so freaking frustrating it’s ridiculous.

When Chinese New Year comes around, I often find myself packing my bags and taking off for a short holiday. It’s not that I don’t enjoy this festive season, but I’m a little bit reluctant to stay home for numerous reasons.

One of the most significant ones is that I dread having to deal with my annoying relatives who come to visit during this time.

Annoying relatives

It is common for extended family members to come back home to celebrate Chinese New Year with their families.

This means that my house is almost always filled with relatives who I don’t particularly get along with. Most of them are my relatives from my father’s side of the family, and I just don’t enjoy their company.

The first issue is that they are all very nosy and like to pry into my personal life.

It’s like they have nothing better to do than to ask me questions about my life and my career, and they always have an opinion about what I should or shouldn’t do.

It’s really frustrating and I find myself wanting to get away from them as soon as possible.

The second issue is that they always bring up matters that are best left in the past. Whether it’s an old argument or a misunderstanding, they will always bring up the same topics over and over again. It’s like they don’t understand the concept of letting go and moving on.

Compare

Finally, the last issue is that they always bring up my failures or shortcomings. It’s like they enjoy pointing out my mistakes or failures, which can be very demoralizing and hurtful.

These are some of the reasons why I often find myself packing my bags and taking off for a short holiday during the Chinese New Year. It’s not that I’m ungrateful for their company or that I don’t appreciate their efforts in coming over, but I just don’t enjoy their company and I feel like I need to get away from them.

To be honest, I’m usually quite happy when they leave and I’m able to have some peace and quiet in my house.

But, at the same time, I feel a little guilty for not wanting to spend time with them. After all, they are my family and I should be thankful for the fact that they make the effort to come over and spend time with me.

However, at the end of the day, I just need to do what works best for me. If that means going on a holiday during Chinese New Year to avoid my annoying relatives, then so be it.

I just started a new job in an SME. In my department I have only one colleague, A, whom I partly share workload with. However, A is very antisocial person. She seems to hate her job a lot and never talks to other people. In fact, she seems to dislike working with our other colleagues. A speaks with a very dead and borderline aggressive voice, it seems like she really hates coming to work.

There was once a colleague approached A to clarify something, and A let out an audible sigh. That colleague came to ask me if A and I fought or anything but I told our colleague it was normal coming from A. A occassionally lets out her anger by slamming files onto her table while reaarranging them etc, and it kind of scares me.

I am also left out of email chains by her. There was once she went on leave without giving me the necessary documents to cover for her, even though our job scope both covers that area. That caused me to be reprimanded by my superior when I couldn’t pass him the info he wanted.

For me, I feel that there are many things that I can contribute to and improve in my department. I am passionate about my job and look forward to work. However, A’s attitude is a problem as whatever suggestion I make needs to have A’s support too, so I am stuck with doing things in the same lacklustre manner.

How should I communicate to A or my superior about this to improve the situation?

Here are what netizens think:

• Simple. Work hard to show the boss that you can take over the little department. Bosses know A’s problem and waiting for someone to takeover her. Her days will be numbered if you are able to takeover her.
• My suggestion is to draw lines on her work n yours. Make a clear distinction that your superior can see. If ever questioned why. U can justify by asking them to compare the work quality of hers and yours. Tell whoever asking, its not your responsibility to make her give a better quality work but it is your responsibility to the company to give your best. On the other hand, u do not want your work to be mistaken for hers or hers for yours as this will most definitely affect your KPI, bonus or promotion.
• Suggest that you talk to your RO about it before it starts to affect your performance. You may not be able to use this to point finger at your colleague for your poor performance/mistake later on, which in 1st place, your RO expected you to deal with it before sh*t happened.
• You should quit SME and join MNC. If I no choice but to join SME, I think I will hate to work just like your colleague.
• Ask her out for a drink or lunch then talk to her first…..if doesn’t work, talk to your boss

I recently went to a Focus Group Discussion on the Accountancy Workforce.

We were informed that there had been a decline in students joining Accountancy Degree and that the supply would not be able to meet the growing demand in accountants.

Things that were discussed include:

1. Skills and coverage of our local tertiary institutions for high-growth accounting jobs

2. What are your perceptions on SCAQ?

3. Where do you envisage yourself to be in the next 3 to 5 years?

4. Would you be interested to pursue emerging job roles with some relevance to accountancy (e.g. IT audit, sustainability reporting), or would you prefer to deepen your expertise and stay in roles that relies heavily on accounting skills?

5. What do you think can be done to make the Accountancy profession more attractive?

The first 4 points were rather mute and normal. The interesting part only came in when we discussed point 5 and the negative side of accounting as a profession. My group (which consisted of all auditors) mentioned the low starting pay and working hours which we believe were common points that everyone in accounting industry say. However, the facilitator from SAC started to say that the pay would grow in the future and that recently there had been an increase in starting pay. She even joked that when she discussed it with the Employers one of them said “no choice need to increase since one of the firmed bumped up the price”. This gave the impression that the employers themselves reluctantly increased the starting pay as they started to feel the sting from people leaving the profession and no one wants to join.

Then the part that made me sick was when we discussed the long working hours and no work life balance. The SAC facilitator said that it is normal everywhere to have long working hours and even she worked long hours. Another person from MOF even chimed in saying that even when his wife was giving birth, he still had to work in the hospital on 2am when his boss assigned him something then submitted it at 5am. He even bragged and laughed about it as if this is an achievement. The glorification of overwork and OT is disgusting.

Coming back to issues with accounting as a profession, we had stated the obvious answers and they just want to gaslight us saying it’s normal and everywhere is also the same. Really gave a sense of hopelessness and it seems like they do not want to change anything. Keeping the status quo.

“What do you think can be done to make the Accountancy profession more attractive?” they said, the answer is right in front and yet they want to be oblivious to it. All this are for show.

What do you guys think?”

Today, I felt my heart properly break for the first time. The course I’m studying has quite a heavy workload so I haven’t been going home for the past three weeks.

My father came to visit me today. He is rarely ever free and today is one of those days that he could make time.

My father is close to 70 years old and he is still not retired. He works as a cleaner at a country club during the day and holds another cleaning job at the community centre near my house at night. For some reason, he had half a day off today and he said he wanted to tour my hall. He came over and after showing him my room, we decided to get dinner at the Kopitiam at Kent Ridge MRT.

I know my father doesn’t have money so I offered to pay for his dinner. Guess what? The silly man ordered the cheapest thing he could find – fishball noodles. There was a lady (very well dressed, looks to be at least middle-class) infront of us in the queue and she left her chilli on the counter then walked away somewhere. My father didn’t see it and thought that that was an extra sauce so he just took it and put in on our tray. When the lady returned, she said very sarcastically that someone took her chilli while glancing up and down at my father. He immediately apologised and explained to her that we were not aware and that she could have her chilli back but she replied “你动过的我才不要。肮脏死”, which loosely translates into “I don’t want what you’ve touched. You’re dirty to death”.

This was when I realised that my father was still in his uniform.

I almost screamed at this lady seeing as she was clearly younger than my father and was being rude. However, my father held me back and simply apologised again. He said that he’s used to it and it suddenly hit me that this is what he does all on a day to day basis.

He apologises and lets people walk over him. He is invisible. I always knew my dad worked hard and is always at the mercy of others but seeing it with my own two eyes was an entirely different experience. I couldn’t even hold back my emotions and start tearing uncontrollably while we were eating. I had to lie that I was tearing because I got chilli in my eye but the truth is I was heartbroken by how my dad has to swallow his pride all the time.

I can’t wait for the day when I can tell him to stop working and stop apologising for everything. All my dad ever did was love and dote on me but everyone else has just been so awful to him. Dear rich people, what did we ever do wrong to you?

I’m an attractive guy who goes for fat/unattractive women because they give me a major ego boost.

I know this makes me a d!ck. It’s come to the point where I’m not even attracted to women “on my level” because going below it is so much fun.

These women would do anything for me. A lot of them were in relationships and they cheated on their boyfriends with an almost unnerving lack of hesitation.

Some had friends who were in love with me and betrayed them to spend an hour in bed with me. A lot of the ones in school skipped classes/bailed out on their homework just to hang out with me.

They all let me in unprotected (some even begged me NOT to use a condom).

They buy me stuff, they cook big meals, they give me random bjs. Sometimes I take it too far and treat them kinda bad just to see what they’d do and it literally only makes them treat me even better.

They all know that I’m seeing other girls and it doesn’t turn them off. In fact, it just makes them want to be the best and “win”.

Some of them get sick of my sh*t and cut me off, only to hit me up again a day or two later. It’s thrilling.