A netizen shared how his girlfriend wants him to ask her for permission before going on a 2-day trip to Malacca with his colleague.

He said that he works shifts, and he spends 98% of his off days with her and seldom meet his own friends.

He said that he told her that he will be going to Malacca with 4 of his colleagues and use his 2 off days, and she got angry saying that he should’ve asked her first.

Here is what he said

Gf expects me to ask her for permission before going on holiday

Gf (30) and me (28) been tgth for a year now. I work shift and 98% of my off days I spend it w her. I seldom meet my outside friends and all because all busy w their own life.

Recently my work colleague jio me go malacca touring. Me and him nv go touring before and both eager to try. I agreed. Then reach home as usual vid call my gf. Then told her bout this exciting news.

I said, “next month we going try ride to malacca. Got total of 4 person for now. “

And she got so angry saying I should at least ask her first. I don’t understand. Like eg “Dear can I go ride bike to malacca w my 4 friends? Will use both of my 2 off days”

To me I feel I don’t need to ask her. I get it, she just wants me to ask as a form of courtesy. But some things I feel we should ask each other for permission and some things we don’t have the need to.

Like eg meet friend for dinner. This one no need ask permission. To me, just ride pass custom go malacca no need ask.

Who’s in the wrong here? Is there smth wrong w me? Or ?? Thanks.

Netizens’ comments

• You are 30….she is 3. Either find someone more mature or tell it to her straight. You can perhaps tell her in a nice way eg “Hey we weren’t planning anything on this date right as I am making plans to go to Malacca with my friends”. It’s a way of showing consideration but not asking for permission. If she still acts unreasonably then maybe time to reaccess the relationship as you don’t want to marry your mother.
• She’s your gf not your wife. If you don’t need your mom’s permission then u definitely don’t need her permission either.. You told her out of courtesy ok la.. What more she wants.
• By telling her, it’s already courtesy…if need ask permission…quickly leave the relationship….good luck 

A netizen shared how his “lazy gf” has a room that is as messy as a rubbish chute, and she says that she has no time to clean it but has time to watch Korean dramas and go out with her friends.

He wrote that they have been together for five year and are engaged, and that they have bought a new home but are renting the property out.

He said that financially, they have no issues, and that they will be moving into their property together after they get married.

However, he shared that her home has given him an insight into how she lives and how life will be like once they move into their new property together.

He said that her home is like a rubbish chute, and that she doesn’t do any house chores at home and leave it all to her mother.

Here is what he said

Lazy gf has a room as messy as rubbish chute

Hi there i hope to get some help here cause i am really out of ideas.

My gf and i have been together for 5 years. We are engage and gotten a house but is currently renting it out. We are planning to rom in a few months time. Currently both of us are busy with work. Our character fits each other perfectly and our career are going towards a very good direction. We have no issue financially and both our family members are all nice people to be with. There is just one big issue for me. My gf is very lazy, with the house chores, fitness and everything u can think of. She doesnt do any house chores and just leave it for her mother to do it. Her house is in a clean state but once u step into her room, its a complete mess, a mad house.

Some example of her room…

She has her blazer that she wore once and refuses to wash it or keep it into her cupboard. And it has been hanging behind her door for the past 1 year. She has her work clothing that she also pile up in her room where she doesnt know which is the fresh or dirty one. And the floor in her room is packed with old and new clothing(alot of it from taobao) which she refuses to pack or arrange nicely.

Lets not get into her make up and and other accessories lying around her room. Just by getting to her bed, i feel like a spider man manoeuvering around her room because her floor is filled with all the ‘trash’. And i actually did tried to pack it up for her a few times into the clean state but it wouldnt last for long before it return to its ‘original’ state again.

I got really tired and i decide to stop doing it because theres no end. It has been 9 month since my last clean up. Whenever i talk to her about this, she would say she is tired from work and will try to clean it up but i feel she is just trying to brush me off. I mean its 9 months and nothing is getting better. She has time to hang out with her friend or even watch korean drama.

I did try to clear out a path off all the mess on the floor for her just to access her bed easier and i told her to try and at least keep it that way. But even such a small task is not achieveable. At this point my main worry is that if we are gonna get married and move in together, i cannot imagine myself getting into such a state. I can try but i dont think i have time to pack it into the clean state with her trying her best to mess it up every single time.

I think even her mother have gave up trying or asking. I am not sure if she is just lazy or i am i asking too much. I feel if i were to keep packing for her, there is also a limit to it. And she is really hitting my limit right now. Most our quarrel circle around this issue. She knows she is in the wrong but she will always try to brush it off by saying she will try her best. But 9months and i am not seeing a slight improvement.

I really love her and at times i can just close one eye and ignore this issue. But just imagine the fact that i will be sleeping in a bed full of bs(clothing, bag, make up, personal accessories etc), giving me just a small area of space to lie, having to come home to a room that looks like rubbish chute, is really giving me nightmare and making me think twice about moving in together with her.

Honestly i need some really good help and advise. Thank you

My husband has been totally engrossed with Tiktoks nowadays.

After dinner, he would have his airpods on watching tiktoks, sometimes joining the tiktok live talking (secretly in the room) to his “friends” whom he knows nothing about, doing trash talk or anything that comes to mind.

It’s a daily thing now, like an addiction.

He posts contents and is very happy to get alot of likes. I’m not comfortable with contents that makes him looked silly just for the sake of getting likes.

Quality content would be great. Personally I’m a more private person but he is one who loves such attention and its bothering me everyday.

Tried to speak to him but he gets upset and feels I’m restricting him. Any thoughts or advice? I’m wondering if I’m wrong to feel this way.

Netizens’ comments

• I’m not defending him, but TikTok is so addictive. I watched K-drama snippets there, even news.  He needs to draw the line between quality time with TikTok and you. You mentioned he likes to do content, why not monetize it? If you are more private, then you can brainstorm the concept and marketing it. Might as well turn it into extra $. 
• You should try and watch his clips. Be kind even if you have mean thoughts. Engage in conversations about what he’s doing. Find out who he talks to online. You don’t need to be interested but you are a team for life. Show support instead of nagging him.
• I’m sure you have some things that you like to do that he hates. Does he use the chance to create conflict or does he give you space and show support?
• Did you give him the attention that he needs & likes? Are you as entertaining as wat he sees in tiktok? Did you try to join his ‘World’ before even objecting to it? Try the above for a start is what you could do. Its not about what you like.. its also about you understanding what he likes!

A netizen shared how he gave his friend a loan of $6k, but it’s been a month since and he feels like the guy is gonna “take forever” to return the loan.

He said that he feels scared that he got “psychologically manipulated” into giving that guy a loan, and that he is worried that the guy might come and harass him at his workplace or home over the loan.

He asks if he should make a report to the police regarding the loan, and also to make sure the guy stays away from him.

He added that all he wants is the money that he loaned the guy back, and that he is concerned the guy won’t return the loan.

Here is what he said

Can you make a police report for someone who owes you money?

Just say it’s been a month and something bad is on my mind. Just say I lent a total of over $6000 to someone and that guy is gonna take forever to pay it back.

But I still feel scared because I feel like I got psychologically manipulated by that guy and I just feel paranoid about everything else in my life in general.

And a part of me is worried that he might try to harass me at my workplace or at my house or heck even when I’m out with my friends.

Should I make a police report to ensure that this guy stays away from me regardless of what his intentions are?

All I want is my money back and I’m concerned that he either won’t pay it back or psychologically manipulate me into letting him run away with it.

Editor’s note: You are the one who loaned him the money, why would he come and harass you?

Netizens’ comments

• Be prepared to lose 6k, n lesson learnt.
• Wasnt there a saying that if u lend money, be prepared to not get it back?
  Had a not so close friend who wanted to borrow money cause his dad supposedly needed treatment in the northern motherland. Outright turned him down, i rather be the bad guy than get scammed, sorry.
• Can make police report if youd like, unlikely police will do anything since technically no crime has been committed and simply advise you to go Small claims Tribunal
• You can make a police report about anything, whether there will be any follow up action is another story. Since he did not threaten or abuse you, you cannot obtain a PPO or anything that “ensures he stays away from you”.