I fell in love with a colleague who left his gf of many years for me and now wants to be with both of us, because he cant turn off his feelings for her or me.

Context

I (32) have been in a relationship for 4 months with a man (43) who left his girlfriend of many years (>15) for me.

Supposedly nothing was bad in their relationship and everything was perfect, but he developed feelings for me.

I quickly fell in love with him, we were on the same wavelength straight away and since he was living with her before, he moved out and in with me as that was the easiest solution.

He was honest with her and with me from the start and nothing happened with us until he ended his relationship.

He is also a work colleague, at a job I just started, just before we met.

He has been at a point 2 times where he doubted so much that he wanted to break up. He couldn’t turn off the feelings for his ex.

I understand that because it takes time after such a long relationship and feelings don’t just disappear.

But I thought that it takes time and when the house he and she share is re-rented and he has found his own place, we can focus on us.

He has found a flat that he can move into soon and we cleared out the house at the weekend and moved the furniture into containers.

As of now, their house is newly rented and I was very happy about that. Moreover, it was very intense and beautiful with us in the last time and I had the hope that everything would be fine.

Nevertheless, I constantly had a bad feeling that something would happen and he would leave. And last night he finally told me that he can’t and won’t turn off the feelings he has for his ex.

But that he also has feelings for me that he can’t and won’t turn off. But he can’t go on like this and be with me, but not with her. And the other way around. In short, he wants both.

I am totally overwhelmed and don’t know what to do now. Of course, this has shocked me and I feel sick at the thought of him being in a relationship with both of us at the same time.

On the other hand, I wonder if I’m not open enough and should give it a chance because what we have is incredible.

Also, this is the first time I’ve been happy with a job and I absolutely don’t want the situation to ruin that for me.

This all sounds super absurd and feels weird to write and I feel stupid for getting into such a situation, but maybe someone here has been in a similar situation and has a tip or two to deal with it.

I told my parents I liked men to avoid their arranged marriage proposals.

So I’m pretty straight, maybe slightly bi if we count femboys. Let’s get that out of the way first. I’m also an Indian male around 28 years of age.

My parents have been trying to find me a partner because apparently it is ‘time’ for me to settle down

I have been here for a few years while my parents are still in India.

I’d also like to clear up some misconceptions around arranged marriage. A lot of non Indians seem to think it’s literally your parents choose who you marry and that’s that, but that’s not really the case.

Instead it’s more like your parents tap their network to find potential partners for you, if you like each others pics then you guys meet in person and then you decide whether or not you want to get married.

So basically your parents are Tinder and you get a meeting or two to decide whether or not you want to get married. It’s not quite as bad as many of you think it is, but the whole process feels super rushed and I’d rather date someone before I figure out if we’re compatible or not.

Anyways, my parents have recently been getting on my case about getting married. Apparently I’m getting older, need to settle down and give them grandchildren or something like that.

Basically every time I see them or talk to them online they have a new potential match for me, a picture of some new girl and ask me if I’d be willing to meet her.

​It’s honestly super annoying, but I’m too non confrontational to really put my foot down and say “I don’t want an arranged marriage”, after all if I do there’d be an argument or at minimum some interrogation about why I don’t want one.

​Anyways, I was thinking of ways I could get them to stop harassing me about getting married and the idea in the title popped up in my head.

Decided to tell them that I like men to get them off me, but end up they try to find men to matchmake me with

I decided it’d be a lot easier to just come out and say that I like men then to explain why I didn’t want an arranged marriage.

My parents were fairly conservative but weren’t the types to disown their kids, and if I just said I like men I’d have a solid reason to not get an arranged marriage – I didn’t like girls

​Soooooooooo that’s what I ended up doing last time I was visiting back in India. They were showing me pictures of some girl and I just looked them in the eyes and said “Mom, dad, I actually like men”.

They got really quiet and awkward and asked me if I was sure and I said yes. My mom told me they’d love me no matter what and to do what makes me happy. My dad was a lot more awkward and quiet but later gave me a similar talk about how he was a bit uncomfortable with the idea, but recognizes that times are changing and I should do what makes me happy.

​Overall I did feel kinda bad because of how genuinely my parents seemed to respond to me, but was happy with the result, they stopped giving me arranged marriage proposals and stopped showing me pictures of girls

​That is until last weekend when I went back to India again. I visited them as usual and was greeted by my mom who was more excited than usual.

She sat me down and pulled out a binder with a bunch of pictures of guys. Apparently my parents had spent the last month or so looking for any and all Indian men who I could potentially marry.

So now I guess I’m dealing with the exact same crap but instead of being greeted with pictures of cute Indian girls I get to see pictures of Indian dudes instead.

FML lol

​At this point the plan is to find a girlfriend and tell my parents she totallllllllly turned me straight or just find a friend to act as my bf idk

My wife (28) and I (35) have been married for 8 years now and we have 2 kids together. Before having kids, we used to be very s-ually active, like 10x a week.

We do it very often, but it died down after we had children

Some days we would have s- in the morning, when I come home for lunch break, and again when we are in bed at night.

After our first kid, it slowed down to about 4-5x a week. Then after our second kid, finding time was hard so about 2-3x a week.

Now that both kids are a bit older and off to school, we have a little more time to ourselves during the day.

That said, she works 6 days a week and I work 5 days a week and we do not have any days where we are off together.

However, since I work from home I can see her around the house on her day off.

Today she was running errands/groceries/doing inventories for our side business.

When she got up and get ready this morning, she was wearing leggings and a cute top.

My wife is a very very attractive girl and she’s petite with all the right curves so every time I see her, it’s easy to get excited.

My work office at home is a L shape desk that you can raise or lower to be a standing desk. I prefer to stand over sitting at home so I usually work standing up and only wears a button shirt for video conference.

Sometimes, I don’t even wear underwear because no one is home anyway and it’s relaxing.

While working, my wife came home and was walking up the stairs. I was staring at her pretty much because she’s still the hottest woman I know and still a eye catcher.

She sees me looking and came over to see how my work is doing and I told her that business has slowed down quite a bit and this year is going to be rough.

Started to go under the table and gave me some mouth action, I accidentally peed in her mouth

She started teasing with her hands on my junk and said she can handle rough. This gets my blood flowing to my ‘kkj’ instead of my head and I said “wanna prove it?”.

She got under the desk and started with a little bj while I’m standing working. It was hot. Then suddenly I had a tingling sensation.

My nose was twitching and I told her to pause for a minute. She stopped the movement but still had my ‘kkj’ in her mouth.

A few seconds later I sneezed and a little pee came out. She swallowed it out of reflex and I told her that I didn’t ‘release’ and that I think it was pee.

The look of disbelief on her face and she ran to the bathroom started gargling Listerine. She said no more BJs and instead of apologizing, I said “like today or forever?”

Hi! I’m a 29 yo male and my biggest weakness is insurance ladies. I swoon over them just like how young girls would over a guy who just got into OCS. There is just something so refreshing about girls approaching guys.

Over the past 8 years I got the privilege to know and date some amazing insurance ladies. At first, I was taken aback by the notion “they just want your business” but then later on I changed my perspective and view the purchase of a policy as opportunity to start dating an insurance lady after I have verified that she is single at the first free financial consultation.

But why not just pursue them? Why do you have to buy a policy? The main reason is because buying a policy near the beginning of getting to know her will avoid yourself being labeled as “timewaster” then you can start asking her out on dates periodically which I make the most of to try and attract them.

But isn’t it a waste of money to buy policy? Why not just go to Geylang? It actually isn’t really because you are still getting critical illness and disability coverage at the end of the day. You can also get policies with significant coverage as cheaply as $95-$100/month.

But what if things don’t work out and she friendzone you? That has happened to me before and I am prepared for it. Hence, I usually go for policies with no monetary value such as term plans. I usually give myself 1 year to determine if there is real chemistry between me and said insurance lady. If not, then no hard feelings, I cancel the policy and wait for the next cute insurance lady to approach me for policy review.

But isn’t it expensive to keep cancelling and starting new policy because the premium will then be higher?

It actually isn’t. This is because as long as you are healthy and under the age of 40, the premiums will not be significantly more expensive. In fact, you may actually save on premiums because between the period when you cancelled with your current insurance lady and wait for the next insurance lady, you are not paying premiums.

Hope this advice help those hopelessly single guys get out there get some dating practice and maybe even help you land your first insurance girlfriend!

I remember the day I was scrolling through my boyfriend’s laptop, looking for the photos he’d taken from his most recent business trip. Little did I know, the photos I found on his laptop weren’t from his business trip—they were from a red-light district adventure he had gone on without telling me.

I had been in a relationship with my boyfriend for about a year and a half, and he had just gone on a business trip for a few days. The day after he got back, I decided to snoop through his laptop to see if he had taken any interesting photos while he was away.

When I started looking through the photos, I noticed that they were all from a red-light district. The photos had a certain “seedy” feel to them, which immediately made me suspicious.

I knew my boyfriend was a bit of a wild child, but I had no idea he would go to a place like that.

Then, I noticed something else—all of the photos had synced onto his iCloud, which meant that he had deliberately taken these photos and uploaded them to his phone. I felt betrayed, angry, and hurt all at once.

After a few days of stewing in my anger, I decided to confront my boyfriend about the photos. When I asked him about the red-light district photos, he told me that he had gone on a spontaneous adventure while he was on his business trip.

He said that he had been feeling a bit adventurous and wanted to explore a new part of town. He claimed that he didn’t do anything wrong or illegal, but the photos were enough to make me feel betrayed.

My boyfriend apologized and promised to never do something like this again. He said he was sorry for not telling me about the adventure and promised to be more open and honest with me in the future.

Should I break up with him?

My heart was pounding as I left the bar. I had gone there for a night out with my friends, and it had ended with me feeling scared, violated, and helpless.

It had started out as a normal night. We were drinking, talked, and having a good time. Then, two men approached us and started hitting on us. At first, it was just annoying, but then it started to get more aggressive and they started to get physically close to us.

One of the men then said something that sent chills down my spine.

He said, “Only first-time pain, after that it’s love”

implying doing it from behind. I was so scared, I didn’t know what to do. I was frozen in fear and all I could do was try to back away and hope they would leave us alone.

Thankfully, one of my friends had the courage to stand up to them. She told them to leave us alone and that we weren’t interested. The men eventually left, but not before one of them made a lewd comment about me.

I have always been a timid small size guy and I have been afraid to say no and face confrontations.

I felt violated, embarrassed, and scared. I couldn’t believe this had happened. I had gone out for a fun night and it had ended with me feeling so scared and helpless. I was so shaken up that I couldn’t even talk to my friends about what had happened.

I wanted to forget about the incident and move on, but I couldn’t. I kept replaying it in my head and I would get so angry and scared every time I thought about it. I was so scared that I wouldn’t go out with my friends for weeks. I was scared that something like that could happen to me again.

Eventually, I started to go out again, but I was always on edge. I was scared that something like that could happen to me again. I was scared that I wouldn’t be able to defend myself and that I would be helpless.

I was on a date with a man I had been seeing for a few weeks, and I was starting to think he was a bit stingy.

I had already seen him try to split the bill for our first date and then he had started to suggest cheaper restaurants and activities. On this particular night, he had wanted to go to a restaurant that was a bit more upscale, and I thought that was a good sign.

Little did I know, his idea of a nice meal was still very thrifty. When we arrived at the restaurant, I was shocked to see him carrying a large water bottle. He explained that he had filled it up with water at home before he left and brought it with him.

He then proceeded to tell me that I should not order any drinks because he had brought his own.

Needless to say, I was appalled. I had never been on a date with someone who was so tightfisted that they would bring their own water bottle to a restaurant. I was so taken aback by this that I almost forgot to order my meal.

I was starting to wonder if this was how things were going to be for the rest of the night. It felt like I was on a date with someone who was trying to save every penny he could. I tried to ignore it and continue on with the meal, but it was hard not to think about it.

When the bill came, I was relieved to see that he had paid for both of us. However, I was not so relieved when he saw that he was charges for the water bottle he had brought himself.

He argued with the waiter, but he said it was a corkage fee, He then said its not wine, but the waiter said he can’t tell and charge as per usual. They start to quarrel.

I couldn’t believe this was actually happening.

this man so stingy until like that?

At the end of the night, I had had enough. I was so frustrated with this man that I decided to end things right then and there. I told him that I didn’t appreciate him trying to save money on our date and that I wasn’t interested in seeing him again.

It was a harsh lesson to learn, but it was one that I will never forget. No matter how much money someone has, it’s important to remember that the little things can make a big difference. Bringing your own water bottle on a date is a surefire way to make sure that the other person knows that you are trying to save money.

It’s also important to remember that being generous is just as important. Even if you can’t afford to take someone out to a fancy restaurant, you can still demonstrate that you care about them by being thoughtful and considerate. That will make a much bigger impression than any amount of money.

It was the Bangkok night market that drew me in. The smell of grilled meats and fruits, the sound of vendors hawking their wares, and the colorful energy of the city was too much to resist.

I had been traveling around Southeast Asia for several months and had felt a deep connection to the culture of Thailand. I was determined to find something special in the night market that would bring me closer to the people of this land.

I would end up being scammed out of a small fortune in the process.

I was browsing through the stalls when I noticed an old man with a wooden box filled with trinkets and amulets. He was offering them as a means of bringing luck and good fortune into one’s life. I was intrigued and decided to take a closer look.

The man opened the box and showed me an amulet made of a small, red stone. He said it was a Thai amulet that was said to bring love and wealth to the wearer. He told me it was a powerful talisman that would bring me all the things I desired in life.

I was captivated by the amulet and its promise of love and wealth. I asked the man how much it cost and he said it was very expensive but he would give me a “special deal” if I agreed to buy it. He wanted me to pay him in cash. I was hesitant but in the end, I let my desire for love and wealth get the better of me. I handed over the money and took the amulet.

As soon as I had the amulet in my hand, the man disappeared.

It cost me 4,000 baht!!!!

The amulet was not a real Thai amulet and had no magical power. I had been taken in by the false promises of the man and had been tricked into giving him my money. I was angry and embarrassed by my own naivety and felt foolish for believing in something that was too good to be true.

I returned to my hotel room and tried to put the incident behind me, but the feeling of being scammed stayed with me. In the weeks and months that followed, I would think back on the night market and the man who had taken advantage of me. I felt foolish for believing in something so easily and vowed to be more careful in the future.

The experience of being scammed in Bangkok taught me a valuable lesson about trusting strangers and their promises. I learned that it is important to think before you act, even when the temptation of love and wealth is involved.

I was too desperate…

My girlfriend has become increasingly possessive and demanding over the past few weeks.

It started off with her asking me to spend more time with her, and while I was happy to oblige, it has quickly become a controlling problem. Now, she expects me to accompany her everywhere and never let me out of her sight.

She even goes as far as asking me not to go to work so that I can be with her all the time.

At first, I tried to reason with her and explain that I had to go to work and that it was important for me to do so. But she was having none of it and would get upset and angry when I told her that I had to go. She would tell me that I should be with her and not out working. She would cry and beg me to stay with her and it was becoming increasingly difficult to handle.

I tried to talk to her about it but she would just keep saying that she wanted to be with me all the time and that she didn’t want me to be away from her.

I tried to explain that I needed to work to support us and that it was important for me to do so, but she wouldn’t listen.

Finally, I had to sit her down and explain that I needed to be able to work and that she was not allowing me to do so. I told her that I loved her and that I wanted to spend as much time with her as possible, but that I also had to be able to work and make a living.

I explained that I was doing this for us and that she had to understand that.

She eventually came around and agreed to let me go to work. However, she still wants me to be with her 24/7 and doesn’t even let me go out with my friends or do anything on my own. She even gets angry if I’m working late and she feels like I’m not spending enough time with her.

I love my girlfriend and I understand that she wants to spend as much time with me as possible.

Anyone got brain doctor friend can intro? Before I jump down.