I would sincerely like to find out what’s Singaporean guys’ definition of fat too.

I’m 26(F). I would considered myself as medium sized. However, guys around me always like to compare me with other female friends who are super skinny and call me fat or “bui”. Although some of them would apologise afterwards, I still get affected by them.

To give some background, I’m 168cm, 56kg. 33C/26/35. Arm 9 inches, thigh 19 inches. I measure my stats twice a week.

I’ll sleep in during weekends so that I can skip my meals to save some calories. I combine my lunch and dinner at 4 to 5pm on weekends. I will either skip lunch at work on weekdays, or get some fruits while watching my colleagues eating pasta and burgers. Btw, I don’t exercise. I only do simple squats at home to keep my bum firm. I would rather starve than to exercise.

I think I do have both woman’s “assets”. Although I do receive compliments from some people, I’m not satisfied with my current figure. It has come to a point where I rather be alone and not have social activities. I do not want to hang out with a group of skinny girls because I afraid people will compare and judge.

Here are what netizens think:

• When your arms are thicker than my legs

• When you have a piece of meat hanging when your standing and seated down.

• I feel you because it use to be envy. But now I realise its not all bad. In fact eating foods is like going on a holiday. You can still eat them but only during special occasions. They’re never really gone. If you want it you can get it. It feels more rewarding when you eat nice foods occasionally. Better than mindlessly eating whatever you feel like then regretting putting on the pounds later. Foods are too abundant, too accessible and too mainstream.

• Be contented with your figure and no point listening to others.. Your figure is OK lah…. Else u can excerise some of it off lor.. Else stay happy.. Ignore those negative comments

• Maybe your body fat percentage is higher. Or your body shape. Sometimes it’s about body shape and also can be face shape and how skinny your neck is. Some ladies have slim face and neck but body a little curvy, people still consider them slim. But a skinny straight shaped girl with rounded face and shorter neck is considered chubby.

What are things that the Gen Zs in Singapore will not relate to?

I feel old thinking about this now. It just occurred to me that kids these days may not know why certain feeder bus route numbers have ‘W’ and ‘G’ in them ever since digital destination signs became commonplace.

EDIT for explanation: Suffix used by SBS Transit to designate the clockwise and counter-clockwise directions of a loop service (e.g. A→B→C→A and A→C→B→A). G and W stand for Green Plate and White Plate.

In the past, buses carried plastic/metal destination plates, and the green/white background was used to assist commuters in easily identifying the direction of travel. On modern buses with electronic display signs, the G and W suffix is used instead.

Netizens’ comments

• Riding public buses with no air con system and looking down at the bus driver’s periscope if you take the right corner seat at the second level.
• Watching cartoons and kids game show on Kids Central. Feeling at sad 6pm because Vasantham Central will be taking over the programming slot.
• Borrowing your classmate’s iPhone or iPod to play Temple Run, Angry Birds, Cookie Dozer and Plants vs Zombies. Brownie points if your classmate rooted their iOS devices so they have free games from the app store.
• KFC was actually good, what happen to my Fish Ole burger and Cheese Meltz?
• For a brief moment, you were able to buy spring powered BB guns.
• Play pre-Big Bang Maple Story after school. Now there are more character classes than I have toes and fingers.
• Getting excited for computer lab lessons, especially playing either Y8 games or Facebook games. (Mafia Wars, Pet Society, Restaurant City, Typing Maniac and MouseHunt)
• Using phones with numberpads, shout out to people who own Nokia and Sony phones.
• Playing Windows Space Cadet Pinball, brownie points if you know how to activate the hack to control the pin ball.
• Playing annoying sounds from your phone, from the high pitch mosquito noise to the airplane take off sound in class.
• Interacting with your crush on MSN messager.
• Writing woke and philosophical quotes and messages on Facebook.
• Owning a Tumblr, Friendsters or a Blogger page.
• Visiting Escape Theme Park.
• Asking people to like your Facebook post so you will give them a rating, first impression or some other personalised message.
• Reading or owning kids oriented magazine. Like Jackie Chan adventure which gives out talismans collectibles, Kids Company and Little Red Dot.
• Reading Mr Kiasu, True Singapore Ghost Stories or Mr Midnight during morning assembly.
• Poking your friends on Facebook, adding them as your biological siblings on your profile.
• Having a favourite judge or contestant from Singapore Idol.
• Using your lunch money to buy @Cash card.
• Using the liquid form of correction tape. Extra points if you jab it on a hard surface to see the white liquid being pooled out from the tip.
• Carrying a hard cover diary (extra Brownie points if your dairy has a lock on it) where you either write daily entries or record your friend’s hotmail/yahoo email.
• Impromptu water battles for people who owns the Nike spray water bottle.
• $1 McDonald Coke
• Anything and Whatever drinks
• Taking out the rubber ball from the computer’s mouse and playing with it.
• Trying to make a call using payphones that accept the plastic phone call or coins without paying.
• Experiencing your computer speaker glitching out when a phone call is incoming.
• Trying to remove the static on your TV screen or cool the back of your thick monitor to prevent your parents from finding out you weren’t doing your homework.
• Randomly singing Phua Chu Kang’s original SARS rap. SARS is a virus..
• Creating a makeshift Beyblade using a rubber eraser and staple bullets.
• You have music from High School Musical on your phone.
• Watching Mr Bean or Just for Laughs on TVmobile while travelling on the bus.
• Riding on the long SMRT articulated bus and dreading the stale sweat smell coming from furry fabric seats in the afternoon.
• Watching R.E.M, Whizzes of the void deck, Ubin Boy, Robbie and the Book of Tales, Groom my Room, Wushu Warriors and Art Factory on Kids Central. (Inb4.. you forgot xxx show)
• For guys, your childhood crush are probably Kim Wakerman (Sunshine Kim). Probably.
• Feeling awkward seeing your classmate/friend with red long marks on their arms and body. We know and understand, united by hanger, rattan cane, belt or feather duster.
• Neopets
• Neoprints
• DDR and those Para para dance machines that include hand movements
• Boarding a public bus only to realise that you don’t have the correct amount of change on you…either beg the bus driver to let you pay less or pay more and put in $2 note
• Queueing up for autograph sessions on weekends back in the days when mandopop singers would come to malls for promos and also perform in mini concerts during events
• arranging meet up at X location and X time and actually counting on them to show up without having any method of communication in between

PLEASE READ !

I am absolutely disgusted in the poor service as an Krisflyer Gold elite member I am getting from Singapore airlines/ Scoot and lost bag services Sydney Airport.

I arrived at Sydney Airport from Cape Town vis Singapore flight TR 20 on Tuesday night 29th of November .

My luggage never turned up at the carousel. After an equerry at the lost baggage kiosk, it turned out that they cannot track my bags because Scoot being a low-cost airline does not pay for baggage tracking.

The gentleman at the lost baggage kiosk registered a delayed arrival claim and promised me that my bag will be delivered to my temporary address a soon as it is located and delivered to Sydney airport. The following day after many phone calls to the airport I was told that the bag was located and at the airport since 10 am Wednesday. It is now 48 hrs later (Thursday) and my bag has still not being delivered.

Having to spend an couple of hundred dollar to buy the basic personal items and cloths to get along since Tuesday I have lost a lot of faith in Singapore Airlines but especially Scoot who should perform at least at an higher standard .

It should be an embracement to Singapore Airlines that Priority baggage are not treated as priority baggage given the price I am paying for flight tickets and the amount of support I have being given to Singapore Airlines over the past year.

Here are what netizens think:

• Back to what you mentioned, often it is a mismanaged by the airport group/services. It has totally nothing to do with the airline, be it a full board service or a budget airline. Airline do not take care of your luggages. It’s the airport takes care of it.

• A similar SQ experience happened to me, still no resolution. Nov 16-21 Gold Coast-Sydney-Singapore-Phuket. You can see my VDO post here around 20/11

• Actually it’s nothing really to do with you as a Elite Gold nor not. Things do happen when there are multiple carriers involved. Am sure the statistic goes higher with other carriers, especially in US and Europe.

Men, I know you’re not attracted to me be but there’s no need to be an a-hole

-the fat, ugly woman

Dear men,

I get it – you’re not attracted to me, you’re not trying to hit on me, I am not your type, etc. You got the message across the first time you accidentally locked eyes with me and looked away awkwardly.

Or the first time you laid eyes on me and quickly had to hide your expression of disgust. I GET IT! But not showing basic human decency and treating me like something not worthy of living is not alright.

Don’t be afraid to be nice to the fat, ugly girl in case she might think you’re flirting with her (because in your world being nice equals flirting). In fact, we would never think that you’re flirting. Instead, we’ll think you’re being nice out of pity towards us.

With love,

The Fat, Ugly Woman

Edit: because a lot of people are misunderstanding my post: I am not complaining about men not giving me attention or finding me unattractive.

In fact, I could care less whether someone finds me unattractive, unless I have feelings for them then that hurts af 🤣. Everyone is entitled to their opinion and their preferences.

The thing that bugs me and a lot of other (unconventionally attractive) people is the fact that (some) people and in my case (as a female) predominantly men chose to be rude and condescending towards women they do not find attractive.

Everyone should be treated with respect no matter what. But unfortunately, that is not the case. Hope everyone has a nice evening or whatever time of day it is for you <3

How do I reject a girl without hurting her?

I’ve been talking to girls but I realise halfway through I might feel that things will never work out be it because of dealbreakers, looks or other reasons.

But I’m quite new to dating apps and I don’t know how to end things.

I used to just ghost the girl. But I soon realise it’s actually quite hurtful to the girl, especially if you’ve been talking for like weeks. Sometimes telling them the honest answer feels worse cause like after a first date you realise there’s no attraction how do you tell her? I don’t want her to feel bad about her looks. Saying something like “I’m not ready for a relationship” is kind of bs also

This is not a troll. Any suggestions for how to politely end the talking stage?

Here are what netiezns think:

• No matter what, rejection is going to hurt. And sometimes, no answer is ever good enough. So be prepared it will not end well no matter how careful and prepared you are to respond and end the interaction.

• I think it’s a nice gesture for you to not want to ghost her but to offer some words to part and for closure instead.

• Don’t say it’s not you, it’s me. Most won’t accept that standard reply.

• If you don’t feel a connection, just say so. Avoid talking about her flaws, someone else may find her “flaws” attractive. Also don’t give her half hearted replies to stay friends when you don’t mean it.

• Whether I’m the one who wants out or I’m the one on the receiving end, I’d prefer to just ghost or be ghosted. I don’t need to know what is the dealbreaker for him, neither do I want to hurt anyone’s feelings with the real reasons. (it’s never pretty) Just let it die a natural death. This is the most pragmatic way, knowing the truth won’t really change anything.

• Just be straight forward. You can keep the reasons to yourself, but you need to make it clear that you want to cut the deal now.

It’s better to end things early before it’s too late.

I’m a 30F and still can’t move past some awful things my parents said to me when younger

I still think about it and I feel like it’s definitely effected my psyche in some way. Some background, I’m also Asian American with immigrant parents.

1 major thing they’ve said to me is that I’m not “smart enough to be a doctor” and that my mom thinks I’m “smart, but not very smart.”

When I didn’t get the job I wanted, my mom told me that I’ve never been the type of person to get a good job right away after college (whatever that means).

These were said about 10 years ago at the beginning of my young adult life.

I made my husband promise me that he’d never say things like this to our son, who we’re expecting next month as I’m currently 8 mo pregnant.

I’ve talked to therapist about it before and understand that my parents were just projecting their own insecurities onto me..doesn’t stop it from hurting all these years later though.

And yes, I’ve brought it up with my own parents before who claim they don’t remember saying these things.

My uncle who is my mother’s only brother is quite well to do as compared to my family as his business was doing pretty well ever since I was in Primary School.

My cousin, his only son has been living a luxurious lifestyle for the longest period of time.

He had always been driven around in luxurious branded cars and has never taken the MRT before in his whole life.

If he had no one to fetch him or could not get the car to use, he would just hire a car from any of the ride hailing apps even if the place that he was going to was very accessible by MRT.

Every time I asked him if he wanted to take the MRT when we went out, he would always refuse and say that he hates to squeeze with so many people and smell their odour.

Even when taxis and private hire services are at a high surge price, he would rather pay the extra prices than take the MRT.

He got his driving license suspended a while back because he accumulated too many points and had his credit card cancelled by my Uncle because he was spending too much and had no choice but to take the MRT.

He would go on complaining and raging on our family group chat on how ‘handicapped’ he felt without a driving license as he could not drive to wherever he wants to go and had to take the MRT.

He would also blame my Uncle for cancelling his credit card making him unable to book private hire rides or taxis, resulting in him having to take the MRT.

It has been a while since he lost his license, and he is still feeling ‘handicapped’ till today.

Image source: Unsplash

I used to work in a bar/bistro somewhere in the city area as a waiter for almost a year before I had enough of my boss not paying my salary on time and always finding excuses to delay payment.

I shall not name the place because I don’t want to have any trouble since I have already left the establishment and got all my overdue wages back.

Business as the bar/bistro is not bad to be honest, we are always full house and have many loyal supporters who always come back to give us business.

Our boss is a watch lover and likes to judge people based on the watches they wear so for example if you wear luxury watches like Rolex or watches which are priced in a close to five figure range, he will think that they are well to do.

If your watch is not a Rolex or equivalent, he will not even bother to talk to you.

He will then start to ‘carry the balls’ of all these Rolex wearers and try not to say no to their requests be it how absurd it is.

Every time when it is time for everyone to get paid, the boss will come out with excuses like ‘business is not doing well’ or ‘the company is not making money’, but still appears with a new Rolex watch to show off to his friends and those customers.

Since he is a ball carrier, some of the staff assumed that he would also like his balls to be ‘carried’ and so they start to compliment him on his new Rolex watch purchases and will always find the chance to suck up to him whenever they see him.

To these staff who always compliment his Rolex watch, they will always get extra ‘bonuses’ every pay day and their pay will not be delayed for too long.

For people like me who does not compliments his Rolex watches but rather just want to work properly and be genuine to everyone, we will always face his many excuses when it comes to receiving our pay.

We suspect that he has been taking money out from the business secretly to fund all these Rolex purchases and has not been accountable to other of his business partners since he is in charge of finances.

The longest I got my salary delayed is about 3 weeks, and because of that I ended up having to pay interest for my own bills due to late payment.

I’m just so glad that I am out of that mess after almost a year.

Image source: Unsplash