Selling myself and I’m not sure if I’m doing the right thing

Ermm, so i am a 28 yr old female (straight) and becos i was molested by male family members when i was 8, i have depression and ptsd, which i have been getting treatment for the past decade.

But ever since puberty, i settle my urges by myself frequently since i still need relief. I have never had a bf, cos i’m not model thin like other woman my age. So recently, I started feeling aroused like hell all the time and initially it made me feel more dirty. But in a spur of a moment, i decided to post an ad online to let guys pet me (no s3x) for a fee. And doing it made me excited.

So I haven’t really done it yet, but my first customer(?) is tmr!! I feel disgusted, fearful and excited at the same time and I don’t know if I should attend the appt.

I’m not gonna lie, I am selling myself.

I am just scared that i will regret it after, and disappoint my therapists. I also come from a strict traditional family and doing this would shred them if they knew it. But the cash is there, my needs are there. But all the psych literature tells me its wrong.

But there are also ppl saying its not wrong cos its my body, my decision.

Anyone out there who can advise? What should I do?

Here are what netizens think:.

• You were a victim before, dun make yourself more of a victim now. What happened in the past is definitely not your fault, so dun make it yours now by going ahead with this decision.

• I’ll say don’t do it girl. Coz I read an interview of a hostess before and she said she was kinda cajoled into doing it initially..

• Are you really prepared for all the things that could go wrong? You are potentially putting yourself in a dangerous situation

So since the start of last month, my neighbors and my family noticed a stench of urine from the drain at our corridor.

Once there was a big plop of poop just lying at the side of the corridor.

Lately, we noticed a strange man wearing a black mask, dark blue hoodie, loitering at our doors. When we open the door, he would run away and dart into the stairwell.

This usually occurs at night, sometimes even close to midnight. It’s scaring us, given that my neighbors have children.

I understand that HDBs are public housing and do not have security guards, so the corridors are counted as public areas.

Even so, releasing faeces and urinating at the corridor is just ludicrous.

Not only does it have a foul stench, it attracts pests and cause great trouble to everyone living on the level. What should we do?

Does anyone have any similar experiences willing to share? I wish to take action fast and not make it a long term problem.

Netizens’ comments

• Make police report, and apply for permit to install a CCTV to monitor the outside of your house.
• File a police report and inform TC
• Go to the cops first. They will provide you with a device that plays a sound when someone is standing outside your door. They will also provide you with a huge “area under 24 hours surveillance” sticker. On your end, install a doorbell camera.
• I am absolutely baffled, that you as an adult man have not reported this to the police. If you were my spouse or parent I would feel really unsafe and concerned with your ineptitude. Seriously, what have you been dawdling about for?
• Btw abt contacting police, which u DEFINITELY SHOULD – either do so online (link in one of the top comments), they will call u back – or call the non-emergency hotline 1800 255 0000. In line w the whole reserve 999 for emergencies thing.

Got blamed by a customer because they forgot their iPad password

I work at a specialty retail store and one of the services we offer is device repair, older lady dropped off an iPad mini for a new battery and probably a new screen (the screen had some minor cracking so 50/50 we could get it off without making it worse, so we quoted the price of a new screen as well).

During the check in of the device we ask for the passcode so we can check everything functions; camera, wifi, speakers, and microphone. Customer declined which isn’t that uncommon.

Repair goes well, screen did get damaged so that got replaced. Customer picks it up and takes it home, she comes back about an hour later and starts yelling at me we changed the passcode.

She had disabled the iPad for an hour because of too many failed attempts to login and it was of course my fault.

I explained to her that since she declined to give us her passcode it was impossible for us to have changed it. (Anyone who works in device repair knows if you mess something up with a device it’s usually catastrophic and doesn’t work at all)

She wanted a discount or her money back which sure as hell wasn’t happening, I’m also the assistant store manager, so I told her we aren’t responsible for her getting locked out and the only way she’s getting a refund is if I put the old non-functioning battery back in and the cracked screen back on.

Did a literal huff and stomped out. Haven’t seen her since

Hey guys, I am resigning from my position as a NSF next month, can yall help me check through my letter and see if you have any comments?

To whom this may concern,

Please accept this letter as formal notification that I am resigning from my position as a NSF Corporal with the Singapore Armed Forces. This letter shall serve as the required one month advanced notice before my final day here.

I would like to thank you for the opportunity to work in this position for the past 15 months. I’ve greatly enjoyed the opportunities I’ve had to practice patience and tolerance, and I value the guidance of my superiors in ensuring that my workplace is kept neat and tidy. I’ve learned exactly what to avoid in order to foster a good workplace culture, and how to motivate staff. I will be sure to apply these lessons in future places I work in.

Career progression has been amazing. Nowhere else in the country can you boast of having a three-time promotion within the span of 15 months – a testament to the value you place on staff development. Salary wise, this amounts to a whopping 11% increase*, which is extremely competitive relative to the private sector.

The employment benefits are second to none: Not only is food, accommodation and clothing provided for, this organization has actively invested in the wellbeing of its employees by providing FREE fitness and conditioning programs. Not just that, it actively helps us in achieving those fitness standards, by having complementary trainings on the weekends!

I am amazed too, by the second to none healthcare facilities. Never have I seen a company that provides world class medical facilities for its staff to use, free of charge, like the wonderful Pulau Tekong Medical Center.

Indeed, words cannot express how grateful am I to have been a part of this amazing organization. The value of my time here cannot be measured in dollars and cents, and it has been a privilege to be a part of this wonderful place.

Despite this, I have chosen to leave your organization to pursue other goals. It would be unfair to deprive others of a chance to experience this wonderful place for themselves. Nonetheless, I wish it every success in its future endeavors.

*70 dollar increase on a 630 dollar base.

Netizens’ comments

• NS has taken your sanity as well
• I just bluetick messages for a month and disappear when I’m finally free lol.
• second to none
• I also shag sia, time to tender my resignation to my encik. But I need to add in some bad words so my encik will be more understanding

My dad spends on all the vices with the exception of smoking.

He also lives day-to-day with no savings at all.

So one day, my siblings together with my mum came up with an idea. We will open a joint account and each put some monies in the account as his old age savings.

Example, each gives him $100 monthly, $50 is given to him to spend, the other $50 goes into his account that he doesn’t know about.

This is for emergencies/rainy days if required. No point telling him to save as people who do not have financial sense will not understand the merits of having savings, especially at his advanced age.

Just save for him without his knowledge.

Netizens’ comments

• Yup that’s what our family did too. It was requested by my father. Each month, every member who is working will contribute $100. We have been doing this for years so there should be a substantial amount inside.
• Just top up to his special account. No point put $ in bank

Private uni graduate salary 2022 Hi all, is being offered $3k for an office executive job low for a private uni graduate? With today’s market and inflation, eg. A salary of $3k – cpf= $2400 (take-home pay).

How to survive? Is it unreasonable to ask for a higher range of salary? Graduates 10 years ago are already earning this amount or more.

The older folks used to say going to uni would ensure you find a better paying job but it doesn’t seem to be the case maybe because everyone’s a uni graduate now.. STRESS.

A degree is not everything

Uni cert dun guarantee u a high salary. There is plenty of it outside. U dun wan, more ppl wan it…

The world is going into recession. Can you afford not to have a job?

You dun take, others who are more keen/hungry will. If you think you can wait for a better offer, that is.

Here are what netizens think:

• Hi there, honestly if you’re a fresh graduate, just take what you can get. Firstly, build up your CPF! Secondly, beef up ur resume , work hard & get glowing testimonials for your next career move. Think of it as an investment in your future success. As you said, everyone has a degree nowadays.. so what makes you special? Unique Selling Point or USP.. Marketing 101. Perhaps you are good at comms, or even digital marketing. If you sit around waiting for the right offer, your USP is getting dusty with no one to discover them. Everybody starts somewhere. BTW, I raised 3 teen boys since 2016 as a single mum with my own household on a salary of less than 2k.. so its not impossible. I managed to upskill thru part-time poly & then with a pte uni.. all while putting in my best at work. It has paid off as I was recently promoted. If you are starting out with minimal commitment, you should be ok.Your attitude determines your altitude

• My first take home pay was 800 dollars. In fact my army pay as an officer was more than my first job’s pay haha. And I worked my way up. There’s so much more than the starting pay to consider for a first job. Does it get you the exposure and experience you need? Does the work culture have any red flags? Are they an organization that has opportunities to upgrade your skills and diversify your qualifications? These will influence your career much more than your starting pay. All the best in your career path! Dont focus on the near term and lose sight of the potential for growth!

• Time has totally changed and you are still comparing with 10 years ago?? Nowadays uni grad is everywhere, moreover you are just on a pte uni (unless your pte uni is super recognised and reputable).

• $3k not bad leh.. i went overseas uni and starting pay was $1.8k leh last time.. you need to find somewhere to gain exp and work your way up ma..

Not attracted to my husband anymore because of his financial habits.

My husband and I are really good together but sometimes I feel that we do not have similar goals and vision as me, in terms of finances & business.

We have a few children together and my goal has always been to give the children the best lives and attaining financial freedom for the family. I strongly believe that financial freedom is the key to living life to the fullest and it is extremely important to me. I know many people would say that money is not everything bla bla bla, but that’s just my personal belief.

Ok back to the story, I plan our finances long-term and do not like wasting it on unnecessary expenses. But my husband seems to be ok with these unnecessary expenses. He has never been good with finances, and he doesn’t have savings himself.

An example of unnecessary expenses, one of them is visiting expensive specialists every now and then for some small issue. The normal person would visit a GP and then get medications/advice from the GP and if conditions doesn’t improve, only then they’ll visit a specialist, right? But no, every small issue, he wants to go to a specialist.

Not only that, his father is sick and we have to help out with their medical bills. Oh, don’t get me wrong, I am perfectly fine with spending money to help his father get well.

Now the thing is that my MIL thinks my husband and I are some sultan or something. They cannot afford private hospitals themselves and yet they insist on going private hospitals and specialists instead of public hospitals that have subsidies. In the end, my husband and I have to help out with the crazy hospital and medical bills.

One example was a one night stay at a private hospital, costing up to $20k – perhaps there was some complications as well so i don’t know exactly how much the breakdown is. My parents in law DO NOT HAVE EVEN A SINGLE INSURANCE PLAN.

I am perfectly fine with paying because of course it’s our duty to look after my parents in law, but I want them to understand public hospitals are fine as well. I mean what is so bad about public hospitals?

Keep in mind we have kids to support, helpers to pay, my own parents to repay and I am also a working mother working on my growing business. Imagine having to juggle between all that.

My husband doesn’t say anything to encourage his parents to go to a public hospital to cut costs and even ENCOURAGES them to go to PRIVATE hospitals like he is damn rich and he loves to flex to his parents that I’m very capable etc. We even have to pay for their maid soon, but that’s a small matter because I really want his parents to be taken care of.

I mean yes we are quite well to do because my husband joined me in my business and it’s doing quite well, but we are not “UNLIMITED PRIVATE HOSPITAL STAYS UNLIMITED SPECIALIST VISITS WITHOUT INSURANCE” kind of wealthy yet.

My husband is a few years older than me and yet he doesn’t think long term financially. I mean at this rate with him, I feel like he will slow me down in terms of achieving my goals. Whenever i tell him to invest our money, he will be like “not the right time” bla bla bla. He just doesn’t have that kind of drive.

I’m torn because I don’t know how to tell him to understand my POV. I do not want to end up like his parents. They have really bad financial planning, and are victims to lifestyle inflation. Even though in the past they were making decent amount of money, they have little to none left now. Bad financial planning is why they are in such a plight now.

I WOULD NEVER EVER WANT TO BURDEN MY CHILDREN LIKE THAT EVER NEXT TIME. I would understand that they have so many commitments.

Oh and I can’t speak up because my husband and his parents has that kind of “I deserve the best private medical care if you can afford it and don’t pay for it, you’re bad” mindset. The father is very sick as well so it’s really not a good time to be talking about how expensive it is etc.

Sometimes I feel so guilty because I love my husband but I know deep down I could never be with man who is bad at finances and doesn’t spend time thinking of ways to grow our money with me. He does try, and i’m very grateful for it. However, after trying for awhile he’ll just give up or forget about it.

I used to always be sexually attracted to him but nowadays I don’t feel it anymore. Perhaps it’s because there are so many things going on and I honestly feel so tired. I’ve just gave birth recently and never really had a proper rest. Am I losing feelings? I feel soo tired when i’m around him recently.

I’m so obsessed with planning the family’s finances well because I really want to give my children a good life, that’s all.

Am I losing feelings or I just want to find someone else more suitable for me? ???? I don’t even know how I feel now. What will you do in my situation?

Not able to move on from my affair to a married colleague

Last year, I started having an affair with a married colleague who lives in Malaysia. However, due to covid, he was stuck in Sg. Being bored when my bf was busy, we started hanging out as friends.

But from friends, it turned into something more when he kiss me. I knew then I should start to distance myself but somehow I was drawn toward him. We are so different in the way we live, our first language, and our religion but I still like him. We did things unimaginable in the bus, playground and places by going third base. We even said “ily”.

One day, when we were in between arguments we made a pack that if this relationship can last 10 years we will forgo our past and be together but things became worst and I do not think it can ever be recovered.

Things started to spiral when covid restrictions were lifted. He was able to go back to Malaysia on weekends and by doing so I became more jealous, more demanding even when I was out with my bf.

He tried to gave in to me by adhering to my request but it just did not satisfy the attention that I needed from him. We started arguing weekly to daily and starting hanging out less and texting less. I know that this is for the better as I was soon to be married to my bf. However, I was not able to let this affair go.

Now, we only lunch together and occasionally go home together but we stop chatting as much when we do so. When things start to seem slightly friendlier and jokes are being thrown around, somehow he will stop talking as much and not letting the convo progress. I know this is for the best and I want to move on to concentrate on my own life. But all I do is think of him and when we talk face to face at times I feel like I am about to cry and I am not sure if he notice it. I wish to know what he is thinking and if he is able to give me another chance. But I also want to move on from this.

I am confused and want to move on from this but I cannot bring myself to do so and would like some advice on how to move on from this feeling and guilt.

Here are what netizens think:

• For god sake, please end your relationship with your current bf. He doesn’t deserve a lady of your calibre.

• Of course the first thing is to let go of your boyfriend. What were you thinking that you wanted to marry him, when all you thought about was the married man?

• He had great time with you, he is not going to leave his family for you.. cut all ties, change job and move on to marry your bf(poor thing) or move on with your own life. Such relationship hardly has a good ending. Don’t deceive yourself and others too.

The 18-year-old girl was involved in running harassments jobs for a loan shark and she went to a door to collect debts and filmed a video to “leave a certificate”. As a result, she dug her own grave and was arrested and charged.
　
Shin Min Daily reported that the police issued a statement that they received a harassment case on the 15th of August, involving a flat at Block 837 Tampines Street 83.

The unit was splashed with thinner, and there was a debt collection document written in red marker pen, stating that “you owe money to pay, this is the last warning”, and left Ah Long’s phone number.

Police officers from Bedok Police Division unveiled the identity of an 18-year-old girl through investigation and access to police video footage. They arrested her on the 17th and seized a mobile phone.

It is reported that the girl shot the picture of the thinner splashed and sent it to the victim, which scared the victim to call the police immediately.

Trisha Amelynna Bte Muhammed Faizal, 18, was charged with one count under the Moneylenders Act.

According to the charge, she ran errands for a man named “Siao Kia” (Crazy Man), and came to the above-mentioned unit at about 5 o’clock in the evening on the 15th.

The prosecution pointed out that the girl believed that she was involved in many similar cases, and requested that she be remanded at the Bedok Police Station and be taken out to assist in the investigation. The case was approved by the judge and the case was held until the 26th.

If convicted, first-time offenders face a fine of between $5,000 and $50,000, as well as up to five years in prison and up to six strokes of the cane.