My wife (28F) and I (30M) have been married for several years, and our life is generally awesome and blissful. We are each other’s first bf/gf, are also each other’s best friend.

This means that we really just speak about anything and everything, and we haven’t really argued about anything since knowing each other. We are relatively successful at our careers so far, making enough money and also leaving a lot of time to spend with each other as well.

There’s just one problem. Our S life is very boring, by all standards, as you will read about soon.

This becomes even worse because I am pretty open to and seek new experiences in all aspects of life, such as food, entertainment and even at work. Actually, my wife is normally quite open as well, and we manage to experience many new things together, but in terms of S, she becomes dreadfully conservative.

One example is, when we got married, it took her about 6 months to be mentally ready for intimacy. This is already quite weird, because we dated for quite long (around 5 years), but apparently that dating process and getting officially married wasn’t enough for her. But this is still not a problem to me.

One big concern to me is that we only ever have S in one particular position. Yes, the exact same thing, from start to end, every single time, for several years since we started getting intimate. It is really getting boring, and in my mind, it is really becoming a chore.

I still love her very much and think that she is physically attractive, but the repetitiveness is affecting me. Think of it as eating the same delicious food every day, it will still eventually become harder to eat and less tasty. Or, let’s say, even if there was a peeping tom with a hidden camera in our bedroom, I doubt he would be still interested in watching us, haha.

The thing is, I have, for a long period of time, constantly tried to suggest new things to try. But she is rather resistant, and just rejects them most of the time. In the occasions when she is willing to give it a try, she usually stops me almost immediately, saying that it feels weird or she doesn’t like it.

And of course, I don’t pressure her whenever she rejects me or dislikes something. In case I get bashed in the comments, I must preface this with a disclaimer that we are both very vanilla with pitifully little experience, so these “new things” that I have suggested are really just simple tutorial-level stuff I googled off the internet. The extent of this, is that it can even include small changes to the brand/type of lubricant or condoms. In other words, we are “noobs”, and I have suggested very healthy and simple things to spice up our S life, but in vain.

However, this is only the first part of the problem.

Recently, my wife has been hinting that we are not having S often enough.

To preface this, just a brief description of how things work between us: I am always the one asking for it, and she either says “okay” or “not today”. So, she basically hinted that I have not been asking for it enough, and seems concerned about it. Frankly, I have just been responding by saying that “I don’t know. But probably due to work stress and also the reduction of testosterone as we age”, which is only partially true. On a side note, I am not sure why she is concerned about the frequency, but is not taking the initiative to ask for S – but this is a different problem.

Anyway, I have actually been purposely slowing down the frequency quite considerably, because I felt that spacing out the sessions helped me mentally, and also made each session more exciting for me. In fact, I was starting to get some performance issues at our previous frequency, mainly because it felt like a chore. But I am afraid that saying this outright would hurt her feelings. And I don’t want to use this as a reason (or threat) to get her try new things, as it is really just my own issue.

As I don’t have close friends or siblings to confide these things with or ask advice from, I have to resort to posting it anonymously. I know that going to a S therapist is a potential solution, but I already know what my wife’s response to that will be.

Plus, posting here, I actually just want to know if this is really a problem? Is this actually normal for couples, who are a few years in? Is there anyone that has resolved a similar problem? Any tips on what I should do next?

Back in 2010 I met this girl, after she followed my brother home from school. I was 7 and she was 9 years old when we met. We became best friends fast; we would hang out every single day. After about six years we ended up dating and it lasted for about 8 months. She broke up with me by saying “I don’t like girls anymore”. After our breakup we continued being friends and she started to date my big brother. At this time, I was 13, she and my bro were 15.

From 2016 to 2020 I was in the middle of her and my brother’s relationship. She told me way too much about everything and every time they had a fight, both of them would talk shit about one another to me. It was usually up to me to help them settle their disputes. I started to slowly realize what bad person this woman was. I realized that during our friendship she had blackmailed me to stay friends with her, had used me to get to my brother and just all together manipulated me.

During the summer of 2021 I had had enough. I cut her out of my life as much as possible. After that she stared daggers at me any time, she would see me. As more time went on, I started to realize more and more things about her and my past. It got to a point where it would physically hurt to see her. Nowadays even her smell can trigger a panic attack.

My bro is a lot like me. A marshmallow, no backbone in sight. He says he’s in love with her, even though he has admitted that he could get someone better. He has almost no friends and I rarely get to see him. I have no hate for my brother because I’m sure she is doing the same things to him as she did to me. We grew up super close, but every year he’s with this woman, he grows more distant, and I’m afraid I’ll lose him.

Between last Christmas and the new year’s shit really hit the fan. My bro (now 21y) came to my (then 18y) room and asked me why I hate my ex (now 21) so much. I told him everything, the manipulation, the blackmail, I even showed screenshots of her being mean to me. I broke down in front of him pouring my heart out and he listened in silence while comforting me. A few days later however, my ex came to my room. She stood at my room door and told me that we had to talk. She cornered me in my room, making it impossible for me to get out.

My brother told her everything I told him. And now she was screaming at me about how I was a liar. This was the biggest fight I’ve ever been in. We were shouting for over an hour. She accused me of being obsessed with her because I had some screenshots, told me that she never manipulated me nor my brother, that things from our childhood should stay in our childhood and that it was actually me who used her. During this fight I told her multiple times to leave my room. For the longest time she didn’t. She eventually left my room only because I refused to talk anymore.

After the fight I had a panic attack. Worst one in my life. My big sister (F23) came to comfort me.

My family was a mess after this. My whole family (parents and siblings) have taken my side after hearing what happened. My big sister and mom hate my ex and want nothing to do with her and my dad inhibited my ex from ever coming back to his house, which is the house me and my brother live in. This caused my brother to never be home, because she couldn’t be there. Right after the shit hit the fan, my brother blamed me for everything. This has destroyed our relationship. We haven’t talked in over half a year now and I barely see him anymore.

I don’t want to lose my big bro but I feel like I’m out of options. I want them to break up, and I want my ex out of my life. What could I do to make them break up and fix my relationship with my brother? What can I do?

A netizen shared how he is married to her husband for 7 years, describing him as being loyal and doesn’t gamble or cheat on her.

However, she revealed that she had been cheating on him for 2 years with another man whom she calls her “soul mate”.

Here is the full story:

“I am in a marriage with a guy for 7 years. He is loyal and doesnt gamble or flirts or cheated on me before.

Before our marriage i had a conversation with him about how our marriage life is going to be. How we would work for our future together and how he would help out with chores and have savings and still spend quality time together as a couple.

He doesnt come from a very good background. Parents are just barely making it. But that doesnt bother me because i thought once we are married, we will work hard together.

He is also lazy and i have to constantly push him then would he do anything. More like how a mother would.

1 year into the marriage, i wanted to annul because he is not providing me with even the basic needs in a relationship. The emotional support, physical support.

2 years into the marriage i brought up divorce but he insisted he wouldn’t want. I gave him that chance.

3rd year i brought up divorce again and another episode happens again. I gave him another chance again.

In our 4th year of marriage and i am still thinking of leaving him. Everything that was promised, wasn’t delivered. Even if he did, it just wasn’t good enough because the basic needs are not even there.

As a married couple, we haven’t had s-x for 3 years straight!

I am in love with a guy who is able to provide me with everything i need from emotion to physical to s—-l needs.

We had been secretly dating for 2 years now and to be honest, we both are like soul mates.

But i am finding the right time to bring up the divorce. Or is there no right time for it? Anyone?”

I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m 24F, and my mum recently passed. My younger siblings are in school and so am I.

Recently, my father has become worryingly overzealous over little things. For example, yelling if I hand a pen that hasn’t been ‘clicked’ open. Scrubbing the mop after its been used.

Waking us at odd hours asking why our room is messy etc. I’ve asked some family members to step in; and for him to consider counseling. He didn’t take it well and said some very hurtful things. It’s devastating to see him spiraling.

But I really don’t know what to do anymore. People keep saying that he needs time but how can they be so sure?

Here are what netizens think:

• People can be so sure because they’ve been through the same thing. I did as well.But having said that, everyone reacts differently and perhaps like what others have said, it doesn’t hurt to show your dad more concern every now and then.I personally don’t think he needs counselling but perhaps for you and your siblings to step up abit more.

• This is a great trauma and stress to your dad. He is trying his best to take up mum position at this grief moment. Time to speak to him in peace moment and help your dad to take up the position. It’s tough but it’s life. Jia you

• He must be hurting a lot inside. After spending 30 years or so with a person it must be hard to let go suddenly. Give him more time, support, and patience.

• Try hugging him. Don’t say anything when he does those overzealous stuff, just hug him tight.And let him know as much as you can, you love him, that it’s ok for him to be in pain, and that he is enough.

• He is trying his best to take a mothers duty. Sit down with him and say nicely that u appreciate his effort but maybe he can tone down abit as u n ur siblings also understand what ur family been through.

• He is suffering from anxiety after losing his long-time support. Just show him more love and compassion for faster healing.

Response from the “Real hubby” of the old Honda Civic

Hi folks, I’m the hubby with that 10 yr old Honda Civic whom my lovely wife “chided” me. There was a fake reply out there but the admin will know I’m the real McCoy (hint: only admin knew the post was sorted from another whisperer’s submission)

Just following up for the curious minds. Nope, I don’t have to sleep in my car. Nope she’s not that angry and merely just messing with me (admittedly I was really caught off guard). I was like “WTF” when reading it and we both giggled throughout the comments section!

The story is real although some facts were exaggerated. Now she wants me to be the spokesperson since I have “fans” siding me…lol

Truth be known, she has no problem with me spending on my hobby but her issue is more on the communication part. I admit I should not have hide the fact that I was spending so much and so fast modding the car. But I want to spend one-shot to mod the car and get over it so I can have fun with the car… without the nagging. If I was more upfront earlier she wouldn’t have made a fuss. That is wrong on my part.

Anyway, we reconciled and enjoyed the comments. She didn’t knew her post will trigger so many car enthusiasts and garnered so much reaction!

And to answer the rest who are interested:

Yes, it’s an FD2R (white, yr 2008) and I’m loving it! Always wanted a Tyre R, a fren is selling his, easy done deal.

The 25k is not the real amount (she wrote that to scare me lol) it was lower actually.

What I spend on:

– G25 rims

– RE71R tyres

– Classified coilovers, for privacy in case you all CSI me. Workshop took down my car photo too.

– Endless Mono 6 potter

– Exedy stage 1clutch

– GruppeM intake (2nd hand)

– Ceramic coating package

– various engine components, sparkplugs, gasket and fluid replacement… really wear and tear

– other mods done by previous fren owner.

– more to come (maybe)

Thanks all … signing off Mr YZH (that’s not my real initial too, more like my nickname’s initial)

Ps: Will not reply/post anymore follow ups…

Happy ending massage but not giving consent for it to happen

I’m really confused don’t know what to do, my girlfriend (20) hates me. So I was highly intoxicated one afternoon and me and my mate went to get a massage from around the corner.

I stated to my friends that I did not want a happy ending or anything extra. We went in I paid full price for the massage and no extras.

I vaguely remember it happening and she told me to roll over and starting jerking me off, I didn’t know what to do I just froze and it ended.

I told my girlfriend as soon as she saw me. And now she broke up with me saying I cheated and now she hates me.

She said I could’ve said no or stopped it. I just froze and didn’t know what to do and I wasn’t in a conscious state mentally. What do I do? Do I give her time? I’m so confused. I need help

Tried talking to her and she just kept yelling at me nonstop, I tried explaining my point of view of what happened. She didn’t even listen to me once, I tried but I got yelled at.

A bit of context is needed and I apologize it may belong. It all started when my boyfriend (m27) and I (f27) moved in last year.

We introduced ourselves to our neighbour (f30ish) and she seemed great, super nice. We quickly learned that the soundproofing of this building is nonexistent, you hear everything. Regular toned conversations, showers turning on, TVs, you name it, we can hear it. I have tried my hardest to be a quiet and respectful neighbour but the neighbour this is about didn’t seem to care and often watched her tv at full blast and would have loud conversations on the phone at all hours. But it didn’t really bother me that much, what can you do?

A few months after moving in our neighbour had a guy “friend” over and it was loud. Headboard banging, slapping, screaming, loud. It was hilarious we thought, the first time. But this turned into an almost daily, almost always around noon, occurrence for about a month and this girl had lungs.

I could hear it everywhere in the building, toilet, downstairs. Just when I was beginning to get fed up with it and contemplating complaining to management, see I work from home and it was incredibly disruptive, it seemed someone else had enough and complained before me. Ah, the sweet relief of quieter sx.

The screaming was toned down to moaning and I didn’t feel as assaulted in my own home anymore. I do think she thought we complained because she wouldn’t look at us anymore after that but I didn’t care, it was worth it.

Fast forward to two months, she and the guy and slowly was getting louder again. But I felt like I could deal with it since they normally happened around noon, or at least no earlier than 9. I had started working some days in the office as well so I wasn’t home to hear it as much, and most days I was gone before 7 am for my second job.

7:30am and I’m startled awake by a banging noise followed by some squeals and moans. I grabbed my pillow wrapped it around my head and tried to ignore it and sleep. 8am and I’m wide awake the noises were growing louder and the headboard was slamming with impressive force. I could feel the rage boiling up. My sleep is precious to me, I work two jobs and one is very heavy manual labour. Without thinking twice I grabbed our headboard and slammed our wall (the wall we share with our loud neighbor) and yelled not very nice things along the lines of “omg shut the **** up” and “I’m so ******* sick of this”. The silence from her side was incredibly satisfying at the moment and it has been beautifully quiet since.

I feel shame, embarrassment. So, I am an old virgin (please don’t ask my age).

Anyway, I met someone whom I like and who understood my situation as to why I am a virgin. After a certain argument, he called to reconcile.

I didn’t expect to get intimate, but he initiated we do it. Wanted it to happen, though I was hoping for some more romance. I tried getting intimate, and it didn’t happen.

We started kissing and touching for a little. I think we rushed, like I didn’t get wet. I didn’t feel much turned on, even after he gave me oral (which probably happened within first 5 or 10 minutes).

He thought I was just dry and grabbed a cream and applied it. However, I felt burning right after. He didn’t even penetrate me and I just felt this horrible pain.

It was a medicated cream used for acne that just happened to be around.

Anyway. I was in too much pain. We both felt horrible after. I feel like there’s something wrong with me. He naturally felt rejected and doesn’t want anything to do with me.

After I got home, I still felt burning sensation down there for few hours. What is wrong with me? Has anyone ever experienced this before? Why wasn’t I turned on by oral? Am I doomed to die a virgin?

Netizens’ comments

1. So a guy in his 40s thought it was a good idea to put some random cream on your private parts? He is an idiot.
   Nothing is wrong with you.
2. Yeah, maybe he didn’t think in the moment.  Though now he blocked my number.  Not that I stalk or call him all the time. I think he is upset and feels played. He said he will not forgive me for this horrible experience 😔 
3. and as to the cream…. yeah cream with acne medication probably has benzyl peroxide or salicylic acid and that’s never good to put ANYWHERE DOWN THERE! uh, buy lube!!