A netizen shared how her brother took a loan from their elderly mother, promising to return her the money but later ran away with the money, which is her mother’s life savings.

Here is what she said

My brother took a loan of about $20k from my mother, and although to some people it isn’t much, it is her entire life savings.

He came to her saying that he ran into some troubles in Thailand and needed help urgently, and when my mother asked him what troubles was he facing, he just told her that it was complicated and that even if he explained, she wouldn’t understand.

My mother loved and trusted him, as all mothers do, and readily gave him all the money that she had saved up over the years, her life savings, AS A LOAN.

Do you know what the definition of a loan is? A loan is “a thing that is borrowed, especially a sum of money that is expected to be paid back with interest.”

He then took the money and told her that he was grateful to her for her help, and that he will return her the money once he settled his problems in Thailand.

Half a year passed and we haven’t heard anything from him, we can’t reach him via messages, calls or social media because he has blocked all of us.

I don’t even care about the loan amount that he scammed his own mother, I can reimburse our mum but it’s the way he used and lied to her for his own monetary gain.

Really feel sorry for my mother for giving birth to such a useless son.

My [28M] GF [28F] texted me while out with friends if she could flirt for drinks

So, me and my gf have been dating now for a year, but have had.off and on flings for about 5 years now. I’ve been cheated on twice now, and she knows this.

Tonight she went out with one of her new friends and then texted me, asking if she could flirt with dudes for free drinks.

Frankly, this triggered me. I immediately asked her if I could flirt with someone for drinks, or that if there was someone was there that she wanted to flirt with.

She ignored the first part and said no. We just moved in together, and I don’t want to make mountains out of mole hills just because of my past.

This isn’t a relationship killer imo, I just want to know if I am reasonably upset or overeating..

Me and my wife have been staying at a rental unit as we are waiting for our HDB to be ready by early next year. We are currently staying with a couple in their 40s as the landlord. Both of their jobs have flexible working hours.

My wife has recently taken up studies sponsored by her company so she is at home most of the time if shes not having lessons.

The husband would occasionally ask my wife if he wants to buy anything or needs him to help get anything whenever he is going out. we thought that he was just friendly and was grateful that he was looking out for us.

Things started getting weird when he started to invite himself to our room and started chatting with my wife when there were only 2 of them around. He would talk about his relationship issues with his wife and asked my wife if she has any issues with me.

Strangely enough, we do not observe that they have any tension towards each other in their daily lives, as such I am not sure if he is finding an excuse to get close to my wife.

He would stay in the room until my wife had to tell him politely to leave. Things got really creepy the past week. Sometimes we would hang our clothes and towels on bamboo and hang them out to dry. Being a bit of an OCD, my wife would always hang her clothes in a specific way.

There were times she would also place her worn socks in her shoes at the shoe rack. She had told me for the past week she suspected the husband had taken her clothes and socks and placed it back thereafter as it is not how she would arrange her things. So god knows what he had done with her clothes and socks.

My wife is so paranoid now that she locks her room whenever I am out and I have been calling her every 2 hours while at work to check if everything is okay.

We also kept all our things including our shoes inside our room and have to resort to using hair dryer and fan to dry our clothes.

We had paid for 3 months deposit but we only stayed for 2 months so far. So leaving would mean we would have to forfeit our deposit, but we were being ‘forced’ to leave under such circumstances so we felt that we should be getting our remaining 1 month deposit back.

However, to do it, things would definitely get ugly and we would have to tell them our suspicions and what we suspect her husband had been doing.

The wife has been very nice to us and we wouldnt really want to end it this way and we dont really want to harm their relationship in the end as after all we do not have any proof of what that has happened. Anyone has any advice on what to do in this scenario?

So, my boyfriend is the first guy I’ve done anything with. He’s packing about 12 cm and generally lasts a handful of minutes.

Recently, curiosity bit me and I found myself intrigued by what it might feel like to be fully stretched out, and ended up buying an 20cm “adult toy” for some solo play when he isn’t over. And damn, it was totally my cup of tea!

When I spilled the beans to my boyfriend, he got seriously miffed and hasn’t spoken to me since yesterday. All I want is to feel nice and full, to be f-ed harder once in a while, is that so awful?

Netizens’ comments

1. So, who wouldn’t be insecure about themselves, if learning that your girlfriend prefers a much bigger c-k than the one you have? Will you ever be able to satisfy her?
   To solve this requires not just acceptance from the boyfriend that you are allowed to have your toys (because of course you are), but it needs serious consideration and above all communication from your side.
   Now that you have gained this knowledge about your preference, do you think it will impact your feelings for your boyfriend? Has it already? How do you see your relationship going forward? Will you be content keeping it to just a toy?
   If you cannot reassure him off all of this, he has good cause to have self doubts, insecurities and concerns about the relationship.
   That being said, he should also come to you with his feelings, instead of sulking in the corner.
2. I have a genuine question. Would you feel similarly if he bought a flesh light and told you it was because he wanted to feel a tight p-sy?
   It’s the same thing here. It’s not that you bought it, it’s the way it was phrased(assuming you told him this).
   To all the people saying that he needs to “get over it,” and “man up,” that’s not the way it works. Men of smaller size have been conditioned by the same women to feel like they’re inadequate. If women stop indoctrinating this type of thinking into men, maybe it won’t be as much of an issue.
3. I think wording is everything here. As someone who is just slightly smaller than your bf, and if I were in his shoes, had you said, its for use when I’m not with you or when you’re out of town, then that sounds way better than, “I want to feel full and stretched”.
   It’s the same thing as if he said he bought a flesh light because he wanted to feel a tight hole for once, or that he wants to be with someone who weighs less, assuming you’re bigger. With that said, it also has to do with maturity. 

How to politely tell my (f20) boyfriend (m25) he is terrible in bed

My boyfriend and I have been together for a year now. In most aspects is the best relationship of my life. He’s the nicest guy, he treats me amazingly, he’s handsome, hard-working and just the total package.

He does however fail in bed. Without being too gross, it’s not a size issue but it’s just bad. He’s not a very generous lover. I don’t hold this against him,

I love him, I just want to maybe like subtly hint at my dissatisfaction. Is there a smart way to do this?

I know some men take criticisms of their ability very personally and the last thing I want to do is hurt his feelings or come off as rude or abrasive.

I need a nice way to discuss this, any tips would be lovely

Netizen’s comments

Don’t be subtle – he’ll miss it, most likely. Sit him down and talk to him like an adult.

My ex- always used to say “If you can’t talk about it, you probably shouldn’t be doing it”. This is a significant part of your relationship, and may point to other red flags in the relationship, like not considering your needs/wants/preferences in other life decisions.

Set the boundary now, or you’re going to resent him more and more as time goes by.

Honestly, i feel very confused about my current relationship now, i have met my current boyfriend during my secondary school days.. We broke up and patched up quite a few times (Most of the time i initiated the convo) many of my peers also told me to move on from him as he was stingy, selfish and he ended things off with me the past 2 times.

I often feel like it was a one-sided relationship. I’m always the one planning dates, finding new places to go, paying more than 70% for most of our meals (as he claims he does not have the financial means & mentions that i am more well to do than him), paying more on hotels and air tickets when we travel together but he can spend 40-42k on a Rolex watch without thinking much..

He also never wishes me or plans dates during the anniversary and doesn’t spend any money on my birthday gift. When i usually fork out money to purchase presents for him every 2-3 months..

I know i’m not supposed to expect anything back since i gave the gifts willingly.

But there was once when i was badly ill and told him to fetch me to the nearby clinic to bring me to the doctor as i was really weak and sick, he continued his sleep and i took a grab down myself (even though it was a 10 mins drive)

I’ve been keeping all these feelings to myself and thinking if one day he will reciprocate back all the things i have done for him.. I’m starting to have second thoughts on my relationship with him and thinking if i should break it off but at the same time i just can’t let him go as he was my first boyfriend and i’m not sure if i would be able to find anyone whom can click well with me.

What should i do?

Here are what netizens think:

• Aiyah first bf so what? Don’t overrate such things. He’s clearly not into you and is used to you giving unconditionally while he just appear. And pls lah. If a guy break up with u twice already, why u still 死皮赖脸不走？I’m sure he’s telling his friends you deserve all these bad treatment cos u won’t leave. Really where’s your pride? Just leave already, next better guy will come along.

• You are paying for the price of your relationship because you are the one who just needs someone to be there in your life. Even if he tried to break up twice, you still cling on to this relationship. Do you think…you will want to marry a selfish guy who doesn’t seem to love you at all? Then, nobody can help you sis. By the way, I don’t believe in “first love” or “first boyfriend”. The idea of first love is all about experiencing that should teach you to do better for your next love. Choose wiser, be treated better and be loved honestly. First love is meant to teach us something that we can laugh about our innocence when we were young. It shouldn’t last forever, otherwise we will call it “the only love”. Now, love yourself a little better and you will know what to do with your 1st love. Take care sis.

• No need to have second thoughts. The longer you hand on to the rs, the more pain you are going to inflict onto yourself. Don’t look back after your left. Love yourself and I’m sure you can find someone better. Don’t believe in first love. This is fairytales. GL

• As u mature, I’m sure u can see that there’s something seriously wrong here. As a woman, let me ask u to imagine his heck care attitude after u’re married, pregnant, with kids etc. Find a better choice.

Have you travelled overseas and when u are back in sg u are bloody p-ssed?

Like why are you back in this overcrowded sh-thole full of rude entitled people? The first thing will be the mrt where u see all the grumpy looking siao lang faces …

then it will the obnoxious elderly or the karens…. and worse of all its jam packed everywhere u cant avoid them!

Netizens’ comments

1. Personally, no. I am always glad to be back especially if I came back from neighboring countries like Indonesia or Thailand where everything is so messy with traffic jam everywhere.
2. sg is just the rat utopia experiment applied to humans, except humans can reason and can be forced, so they can be pushed beyond the limit, much further than rats.
   No sense of personal space, no sense of belonging, no sense of self, just a puppet to the state, a rat running on a treadmill powering the gdp generator, nothing to hope for, no future.
3. All the time. That’s why I’m moving to Malaysia. People there are way nicer, it feels more human (if that makes any sense?), and I get to be connected with nature better. Many Singaporeans already doing this and love it there.
   I don’t even like going out in Singapore anymore cause everything feels rushed and crowded. I was scolded by strangers a few times cause I didn’t walk fast enough in a mall. Was literally looking at a dunkin donuts stand to pick my donuts ffs.
   I remember getting honked aggressively while parking in a Malaysian mall. Guess what? It was a Singapore registered car.
   I would rather stay in a place where I’m mostly happy and at peace, rather than a place that I can’t stand and makes me want to go on vacation every few months.
   It feels like everything in Singapore is optimised for work, business, consumerism, at the expense of what fulfils our inner soul and happiness.
   People tell me I should just stay in SG cause of stronger currency and can afford iphones and branded bags easier. Literally how much does an iphone and branded bag improve your QOL? My relatives in Malaysia couldnt afford the same material stuff BUT they are significantly happier and they can easily retire in their 50s. They’re living their best lives now and they’re not even T20. How many of us can say that for our parents in Singapore? How many times have you seen an old uncle or auntie still working because they have to?
   It also feels like Singapore is that one annoying sibling/friend who:
   • has low EQ
   • keeps trying to one up everyone
   • are obsessed with how materially and academically successful they are
   • has little to no graciousness or empathy for others
   • gets butthurt easily when their flaws are pointed out. 🤷‍♀️
   • can’t accept it that others can be better than them even in non-material ways. They don’t even attempt to improve on their weakness, instead they’ll proceed to do the point below.
   • And then tries to compare themselves to someone else who is doing much worse just to feel superior again (although sometimes it’s nicely disguised as gratefulness). This one gives me the absolute ick.
   • thinks others dislike them due to jealousy. But we alllll know the real reason nobody likes them hehe.
   No amount of quality education and money can make up for how rude and selfish most Singaporeans are.

Am I turning into this old menopausal qia zhar bor with frequent mood swings?

U remember in school how we used to joke about our female teachers who are spinsters and anyhow scream at the students who can’t seem to behave properly in class? Well, as I age, I fear that I’m becoming like one of those monsters.

I live in the same house as my parents, sister and bro in law. My annoying BIL is nothing but a leech – earns peanuts, prefers to sleep instead of spending time with son, doesn’t pay for anything related to the son and of course doesnt contribute to household allowance. Despite that my parents wash his clothes, cook his meals, does housework for him etc. He’s like a handicapped baby even though he is 40s and a father himself.

So with all the inflation happening, the family has been trying to be thriftier recently. Which includes switching off the lights and fans when not in use (very common right). BIL would just waltz into the bedroom, turn everything on, then few minutes later walk out to the living room switch on the tv, and conveniently forget that the bedroom lights fans and aircon are on while he sits in the living room for hours. I always just go and switch everything off fuming inside silently because idw to sour relationships. This has happened so many times I lost count. Few times I came back from work to see ALL the lights at home switched on, because BIL “forgot” to turn off before leaving house.

He also has many bad habits ingrained in him that are so undesirable – not washing his own bowls after eating, throwing his dirty clothes all over the floor and on the chairs expecting ppl to pick up for him and put into the washing machine, not brushing his teeth nor wash his face nor comb his hair in the morning before going to work, leaves his soiled tissues on the bed, not locking the main door after leaving house, he has never changed his pajamas and his bath towel since moving in with us 6yrs ago etc etc. I could go on and on about his nasty habits (as I typed this my BIL has just finished eating his dinner and left his utensils on the dining table, the fan full blast on when no one is there, and didn’t keep the dining chair that he was sitting on). Sometimes I really wonder why my sis fancied him back then. ????

One fine day I just lost it and lashed out at how freaking useless, irresponsible, unclean and messy he is, 40 yr old father alr still like that, none of his friends behave like him, it’s time to man up and step up like how a family man, head of a household should behave. I guess I also got tired of picking up the slack after him (as well as that of my sis who has started becoming like him and treating our mum like a maid). My sis actually retorted that this is the reason why I am still single – because i am too fixated, I want things done my way and I make mountains out of molehills, if I can’t swallow my pride of having to wait on a guy, then guys will never find such a strong independent woman like me desirable.

I must say this has stayed on in my mind for awhile – just like how ppl say unmarried men age like fine wine while unmarried women are just left on the shelf and there MUST BE something wrong with them which is why they can’t find their better half (and that’s usually due to foul temper). Why can’t this all boil down to family upbringing on the part of the male, and instead it always seems to be the women at fault? Am I really becoming this nasty unreasonable spinster that all single unmarried women turn into once we hit 30?