We’ve been a couple for 2 years alr but I’m getting tired of him.

We’ve been arguing almost everyday for the past 2 months. Every argument was just full of grudges.

When we first started dating, he seem fine. Good looking, treats me well but as our dating days goes by. We lost more trusts n faith with each other, always second guessing each other. We breakup n get back uncountable times n now I’m really getting sick n tired of this relationship.

We met through mutual friends and his job just happened to be mine interest, so I left a comment on ig and then we started dming each other so end up being together. First few months of the relationship was good. Afterwards, we been arguing at least twice a week. The contradiction between us getting bigger every arguments.

When we dating, I once saw his phone apps consist of those meetings new friends apps ( but these apps usually is meet new gender friend and end up being a couple). I asked him why u need these kind of apps? He said I’ve always been ignoring him, since mine phone always on silence and he suspect I have affair outside just because a guy sent me a hotel room detail. But that was because I need to go his room for works and that guy I working with is a good husband. Everyone know how well he treated ppl, how popular he is at work. I cannot deny having eyecandies on him when he have capabilities as a boss and as a person.

We went out for a date n my bf didn’t say anything. just silent treatment when I asked him qns and he just left me alone in the mall n walk away. I messaged him what wrong,why are you giving me cold treatment. He said was because of the hotel incident and I said why didn’t u ask me. I could’ve shown you the full messages. I was very disappointed that he think I was such an easy person to get laid with. When I was working, all in mine mind was just to earn enough money so that we can have a grand wedding event. We could’ve sat down and talks about his unhappiness but he decided to just being angry and thinking that I cheated on him.

He also been meeting his exes. I once saw his message notifications from his friend stated ” wah, you going meet Ur exes ah? Not scared Ur current found out?”. I was so furious when I saw that notification.

During dating, we said we’ll be honest with each other regardless of what but he didn’t even mentioned that the ex asked for meetups with him. Only when I confronted with him,he started blurting out.

I’ve never mentioned about my exes because it’s in the past n we didn’t have contacts anymore but he did. He not only didn’t mention about it but also went to meetup with his exes.

One of our biggest arguements almost lead us to breaking up permanently. He suggested it but I didn’t want to. So he said ok. Let’s have cooldown periods instead. So during the cooldown period, I went out with 3 other friends( 1 F, 2M) we went to USS tgt. But he been accusing me of cheating on him with one of the guy because we took pair shot.

All of us are close friends and even my bf know them since we have mutual friends. He’s such a atrocious person to think that because of pair photos, I cheated on him. Moreover, the 2M also have gf already. We’re just purely hanging out to catch-up as clique. He also accusing me saying I’m a slut for hanging out with guys during our cooldown period but I don’t see anything wrong with mine actions.

he also ownself went out to drinks with friends, make new female friends at the drinking place. His friend ig stories videoed him playing happily with all the gals and said he’s single during our cooldown period then his friends also proceed to video him asking the gals for their social media, contact no and etc.

He said all the female contacts he added was just Vase. Just to look like he’s popular with gals but he don’t contact them.

He said he just using the ig stories to make me angry cause I went out hanging with clique that have guys included so he’s doing the same and he also have a lot chats that require password to enter.

I’m so done with him but I don’t want breakup with him. I should be the one dumping him not him dumping me. I have many admirers and all of them are better than him whether in looking, studies or as a person. I gave him the chance yet he felt that I was the one unreasonable during our 2 years of relationship.

Here are what netizens think:

• So he has to accept you went to a hotel with a guy alone, but you are not ok with him having app on his phone.”I am so done with him, but I don’t want to breakup with him”You are so full of contradiction. If you can’t decide go and pluck flower petals.”I should be the one dumping him, not him dumping me”What are you 3 years old?”I have many admirers blah blah”With your mindset, nothing will change.

• Just break, both of u are not emotionally and mentally matured to carry out a proper relationship.

• Certainly, there’s NO LOVE between you two, only resentment, hatred & grudges. Why don’t you two break up? Social pressure? or mutual friends? Forget everything about what others might think and just break up. Because at the end of the day, it’s only YOU who are gonna be responsible for your life’s decisions. Start a new life full of love, care & respect. You must be able to LOVE & RESPECT someone in order to be in a relationship with him. Love is about feeling for each other, bringing meaning to each other’s lives, uplifting each other & finding immense happiness in doing all these. That’s so fundamental to start with.

I need advise.

I suspect my husband is having a affair with my daughter.

I got married & gave birth when i was 18.

The marriage eventually ended & i remarried, bringing my daughter along when she was a teenager.

Now my daughter has grown up and married. However, my husband’s behaviour seems weird recently.

He will want to include my daughter in every outing or meal. I can’t go “paktor” with him anymore without him asking me to call my daughter to come along.

Once during dinner with friends, he chose to sit beside her instead of me, taking up the seat meant for her husband. When i asked him to move over & sit with me, he just said he prefers to sit there with his girlfriend.

I trust my daughter not to have anything of that kind with my husband, but i don’t trust my husband anymore. He would rather go to her for opinions and help everytime when he has a wife just beside him. I tried to talk to him about it but he always changes the subject.

Do i have the right to suspect him?

Here are what netizens think:

• that is only dad love.
• I’m not surprised that your husband is physically attracted to your daughter who is not his biologicial child. But what indications are there that there’s an affair? If really have hanky panky going on, most likely they will distance themselves on the surface
• How did you end up to be distrustful,any history of infidelities existed previous? This is a very serious allegations
• Your husband don’t want you anymore ..he want to respect his new woman that he love.
• Did u ask ur daug ? How her reaction?
• jealous over daughter??

Over glasses of wine a good friend of mine, who I met years ago through my husband, let me know a little “secret” that she and some of their friends had been keeping.

Evidently, after my husband and I slept together for the first time years ago on our third date, he told a few of them, his good friends (some male some female), that he had just had the best s– of his life. (That’s the good part)

These friends of course pried more details out of him about why it was so great, and evidently he told them some things about my body and my moves.

Just friendly banter, I get it. But of course we ended up getting married, and they had those details, and she said it’s all no big deal but sometimes they still tease him about it.

I even had a nickname for a while but that has been phased out now that I’m “official.”

Is this weird? These people are my friends and I feel a bit odd knowing there was this secret thing. But on the other hand it’s kind of silly/funny.

Curious what others think.

Netizen’s comments

You guys only had three dates, he was in a way closer to his friends at the time than he was to you. It happens that people share these kind of details with their friends on this kind of occasion. It was probably a marvellous moment for him and he wanted to share it with his friends.

This seems to be a long time ago and it also seems that he hasn’t shared more recent details since.

It is just an anecdote, don’t overthinking too much. Your husband was happy, he shared his happiness with his friends and now his friends are so close to you that they share that story with you 🙂

A netizen shared how he feels that the media is portraying the opposite of genders – that men are violent and women are ladylike.

Here is the story:

“Hi, just wanna ask a few logical and thought provoking questions.

How come what the media portrays is the OPPOSITE of what we learn about gender stereotypes? I thought men are genetically wired to be violent, so men are the ones in gang fights and bar fights, and they settle conflict with a bloody punch to the nose and a few broken ribs.

If that’s the case, then why is it that it’s women who slap? If men cheat, it’s “acceptable” for women to slap them across the face, but if a man were to slap a woman, we say it’s domestic violence. So slapping, an act of violence, is ladylike and feminine, and thus attractive?

If men are generally seen as angry and violent, while women seen as gentle and empathetic, why do we never see men slapping women but always see women slapping men? Does that mean violence is more of a feminine thing than a masculine trait?

Also, assuming you support violence and you believe that slapping men is right, (you might have done it in real life before, I don’t know?) then why don’t you use the same amount of force to punch his stomach or face instead?

If you’re upset enough to slap, then wont stomach punching cause far more pain and injury than face slapping? You could dislocate his jaw or cause some serious bloodshed if you condone violence through slapping?

Someone explain this paradox because I don’t understand.”

Editor’s note: How much have you drunk.

what do you think of ambitious colleagues?

I mean it is good for them, I wish them well when they worked really hard trying to advance their career or doing something new outside of their job scope. But sometimes it just makes me really stressed out.

Both of us are fresh grads, I joined like 6 mths before this guy, and our job scopes are similar, with similar pay range. But he seems to always go the extra mile to do stuff. Like during meetings, we are supposed to just show our work progress and what we have done for the week, he just seems to have done a lot more, showing stats and graphs and analytics and whatnot that is not really required for the presentation. He also did some stuff out of his job scope, which impressed the managers. Then after a few weeks my manager talked to me saying I need to follow his example to do more when he was happy with my performance before the new guy came in.

I’m not ambitious, just want a job to have a simple life, and because of this colleague, make me feel worthless and not up to the raised new standard. What if another colleague comes in and performs even better?? Is the bar going to be raised higher and higher with the same pay and job level??

I know people will say “oh just level up and keep level up, this just shows how incompetent you are”, but I’m really not interested enough to live a life that way or want to see my job as a never-ending upwards cycle. Ofc if need be, I will gain new skills required but as of now for my current job this stuff is really out of the job scope.

I’m not blaming people for being ambitious or being salty, I just feel that maybe this is just too competitive for me and I should leave instead of being sad that my performance is getting lower in the managers’ eyes despite me trying to do my best for the job I applied for.

Here are what netizens think:

• Nah. You do what you paid to do, within your pay grade and job description. Nobody likes a show off in the long run. Maybe they’ll like him now, but once he can’t keep up with his own abilities and showboating, he’s out.

• You should leave and join a mediocre company that prefers mediocre workers, so that the company with the excellent worker can stop tanking your work

• His just carrying ballz trying to be the next GM. Either he will be your future GM or get thrown out by current GM if he will feel threaten la.