I’m actively trying to replace my good friend at work and lying to his face about it

He got offered a job through connections and kissing up. He knew I desperately wanted it and even admitted I was way more qualified than him and “you definitely deserved this more than I do,” so he will “leave a good word when (he) eventually leaves.”

Now, the boss is more interested in me since my friend is WFH but boss prefers the office.

My friend has told me on several occasions that he thinks the boss will replace him with me and it makes him upset, and I keep comforting him and saying it will never happen, while secretly feeling happy and doing everything in my power to make it happen.

It has been my dream to work for this company for almost a decade and everything about it fits perfectly into my interests, career and even future education opportunities.

I’m not sure if I’ll lose his friendship if I am given the job, I’m too focused on the fact I could work for the company of my dreams.

Update: he is currently working for the company but I don’t (yet). He’s the one that has always been competitive and insecure because of my background (he’s even lashed out at me because he was once jealous of someone becoming my best friend instead of him), while I am jealous of the fact his kissing up has gotten him so many opportunities while I had to put in 10 times more work for half of what he got.

Neither of us are perfect but convenience has made us friends for over 10 years. However, I know he would do the same if our roles were switched, that’s why I don’t feel bad.

Netizens’ comments

• I’d stop lying to him and trying to comfort him. You’re not his friend anymore. You’re just not.
  This is the nature of the business, and that’s fine, but don’t be disingenuous.
• You both sound like a-holes
• There’s nothing wrong with working hard and being rewarded for it. If your friend is worried about his job, he should step up his work game.

Scammer received item but doesn’t want to pay.

Hey guys, I recently dealt on Carousell via caroupay – selling a headset about $300+

The buyer paid with Caroupay, then I shipped the item to his address, but before I could confirm the item as shipped in the system, he already clicked “cancel deal.

This initiates a refund although the item has already been shipped(as of last week, already delivered.)

I have his name number and address, but he is not responsive and blocked me on all platforms.

I have also visited his place twice to no response as well. If I make a police report will they entertain?

Or are there any other ways to deal with this fucker? $300 is not a small amount to me

Netizens’ comments

• Involve police… maybe he needs a hard lesson
• whats the carousel username anyway.
  gonna need to note down these kind of slimy buyers.
• thats why i refuse to use caroupay because of these buyer-sided payment system and insist to meet face to face.
• Maybe next time above $50 face to face transaction. Carousell bound to have such a-holes
• Contact Carousell and see what they say.
• File a police report

i am a pathological liar

i dont know why i do it, its just kind of instinct, i dont do it out of malice or to hurt anyone but ive been like this for as long as i can remember, i do it sometimes to explain the way i am,

i say that i have autism when i havent been diagnosed although i have all the symptoms, ill say that i was homeless at one point when in actuality i had a roof over my head even if it wasnt a good one,

and then i have to make up other lies to cover up for the other ones, i dont feel terribly guilty about it in my everyday life but its a secret ive never told anyone

Netizens’ comments

• I used to be a liar. You can change. Tell your friends (who already know anyways) and call yourself out immediately after telling a lie. It takes time, but it’s possible.
• I used to be the same. I just made a promise to myself one day that I wasn’t going to start any more new lies and I held myself to it. I didn’t necessarily out myself as a liar to friends/family, just quit saying the old lies and no new ones at all. It’s been a lot of years now and I don’t lie at all now and the old ones have faded away completely.
  You can change! And it’s so worth it. No more keeping up with it, no more making sure my stories match up, no more fear I’ll get called out or caught up. It’s freeing and feels so much better.
• I was the same. I have since flipped, and honesty/justice are now my strongest virtues. Being a liar is a really shitty life.
• I used to lie about everything in my early 20s. It wasn’t until I was 25 that I realized life was just made easier through honesty.
• Going to be a problem if one day you’re telling the truth about something serious, case of ‘The boy who cried wolf’

Dealing with unappreciative kids when giving ang bao

This is the first year that I’m giving out ang bao and when handing out ang baos to my cousin’s kids (4 of them), none of them wanted to take the ang bao.

I literally have to shove the ang bao in their face cause they were all playing on their phones, and because I have a really bossy aunty that I hate eyeing on my every move to tell me who I missed out to give ang bao to (wtf).

Anw I did not even receive a word of thank you from them, which makes me so argh.

Has anyone even have such encounters and what do you do? Can I just not give them ang baos next year lol

Netizens’ comments

• You have no obligation to give if they don’t even respect you enough to wish you CNY lol..
• Your weird aunty see can already right, so just give the angbao to their parents.
• I made it a point to my wife, my relatives and myself that if the kids don’t greet and give oranges, no Ang bao. Worked so far as kids come to me instead of the other way round
• You should give them when they come to you and wish you the standard 4 word (chengyu) wishes. No effort no angpow
• Next year if they never bother to greet then don’t care. Parents should bring their kids to greet other adults as a form of respect. Not like you come 拜年 with the kiddos. As for your aunt, sounds so kpo, just let her watch you lor. Never be a ‘people pleaser’

I (22F) hooked up with a 52 year old (probably married) man and it’s my biggest regret

I don’t know why I’m posting this as I’ll probably get a lot of hate and feel worse. I have a long history of having issues with impulsivity, and have gotten myself into a lot of bad situations but this one is the worst.

I always had this fantasy of being with a much older man but never acted on it until this past October. He found me online and after only seeing one picture of his face I agreed to have him over to my place that same night.

As soon as he got there I knew it was a huge mistake but when he got undressed is when I really got scared. His body looked even older than what he said he was so he could’ve even been lying which makes it worse.

He was just so old and gross. I also look younger than I am, with a flat chest and young face which I think also makes it worse, I don’t know how old he was perceiving me as.

I basically froze and just laid there barely making a sound just waiting for it to be over. After I told him to leave and escorted him out and pressed the elevator button for him and ran back to my room.

I was so dry during it I was bleeding after. The next day I couldn’t stop crying. I wanted to throw everything innocent down the trash like my stuffed animals (which were on the bed) because I was dirty and ruined.

He told me he was separated and without thinking I believed him, but now I almost know for sure he was still married with how he was sneaking around.

I’ve tried searching everywhere online for info about him but I think he gave me a fake name because I can’t find anything. I just wish I could tell his wife everything and expose him.

If my parents knew about this they would never look at me the same. I’ve told a couple friends and my therapist but that’s it. But even if I did find love I’m scared to get married now because what if my husband ends up like this man, cheating on me with young girls.

I know I’m going to get a lot of hate for this but also know that a lot of girls who do things like this and are promiscuous are really just insecure and hurting badly inside, so think a bit before you judge them. Or judge them/me, I can’t control that, just know we hate ourselves too.

My son wants to be a Landlord and is insulting me because I am a tenant.

My (41m) son (15m) has taken a keen interest in becoming a landlord but has also started insulting me for not owning my own house.

I am glad to see he has taken some initiative however I am concerned about his mindset. We currently live in an apartment and he has told me that I am a “failure” and a “rentoid” and that he is “embarrassed to be related to someone without any properties.”

I tried to explain to him that homes cost a lot and that I have worked very hard to provide for our family and that there is nothing wrong with choosing to rent. I also explained to him that Landlords often mistreat their tenants and that if he wants to be a landlord he should work on being a kind one, however he has insisted that it is the right of landlords to charge whatever they want and has said when he is a landlord he wants to “evict single mothers” which I found very concerning.

This month my son offered our landlord a 50 dollar “tip” out of his own money. I tried to explain you do not “tip” landlords but he insisted I was being a “greedy renter” and taking advantage of the landlord. I explained that we paid significant rent already but he did not listen.

Before this started he was really into video games and did not seem to try very hard in school which I found concerning. his words hurt me and I feel his mindset is not constructive and compassionate. I don’t want to discourage him but I am very worried about him.

Losing sleep over losing hair

I met a girl. We got on really well and are both looking for the same thing (long-term r/s). After multiple dates and signs that she likes me as more than a friend as well, here’s the thing:

I’m bald.

I’ve been wearing a wig to our dates, and she doesn’t know. I know… I’m a catfish and an a-hole, but if you’re not bald you probably don’t know how looking like this in your early 30s completely destroys one’s self-esteem.

I want to be honest with her before we officially enter a r/s. How would you break the news to her if you were in my shoes?

Here are what netizens think:

• I’m in my 20s and already have receding hairline with the distinct “m”, along with a high forehead. I foresee becoming totally bald in my 30s and thats what I’m going to rock. Forget about how other people look at you, focus on how you look upon yourself first. If you can accept being bald and walk around with confidence, I believe you’ll feel much better with or without a partner. You’ll know when the right person comes. Trust me I know how you feel.

• What is your view after watching those full/drastic make up video of woman before & after? If you think you feel cheated then be prepared to face the reality too. If you think all women deserve the chance to be called as beautiful after their makeup means you have the possibility to get her acceptance too. After all, how you treat or regards others will have a reciprocal effect to own self.

• Dude, she doesn’t know yet this is chewing on your conscience. So obviously it’s affecting you more than it’s affecting her right now. Just tell her lah and see how she reacts. Just don’t hope that she will understand you completely, and if she doesn’t, she’s probably not the right person for you. For all you know, she probably already guessed you’re wearing a wig… Be brave about this…