I (21) and my boyfriend (24) have been together almost a year and a half. Since we’ve been together he would often get hammered at a friends house every weekend and I would have to take care of him.

I had enough after he went to a local concert and got so drunk he peed himself twice. This was in April. After a long conversation he seemed to understand that it was time for him to grow up.

However, every time we went somewhere he got so drunk he peed himself or in the bed. I begged him to stop after each time fighting back tears and he always said it was the last time but it never was.

I reached my breaking point his birthday weekend. This was after 4 months of having the same conversation. He got hammered with his friends and they decided to go to the bar.

He had already peed his pants before he got there and had to borrow a friends pair so he didn’t realize he didn’t have his wallet with him until he got there and they wouldn’t let him in.

He showed up to my house at 2 am with no idea how he got there. He could barely walk and couldn’t form a complete sentence. I took him back to his apartment.

The next day I told him we need a break until he stops doing this. He keeps telling me that I’ve really scared him this time and he’s getting a handle on it.

I almost wanted to believe him until I ran into his best friend’s girlfriend at a bar and she told me that after I told him we needed a break they all went to her family’s lake house for Labor Day weekend and he got blackout and peed on their couch.

I care about him and we have talked about our future together a lot but I can’t keep putting up with this. I think we make a great couple and we’re happy together but this is tearing us apart.

Is there any hope that he will change? How can I get him to see he needs to stop?

I’ve had my fair share of toxic relationships that may have left me rather traumatized. Sometimes I’m not sure if my partner is good or bad for me or am I the problem?

2 days ago we fought because he made soup but I’m sure he used tap water (here if full of chemicals and parasites) and when asked him he said he had boiled water earlier, which I know is not true.

I began asking more questions and he told more lies. For something that dumb? Feels like he could lie for other stuff and I’ve felt as it has happen. He got mad at me for “drilling him with questions” and we haven’t spoke since then.

This is added into my mind to other issues we’ve been having and I’m not sure if it’s worth it to keep on trying for this relationship to work of he’s going to lie and I feel he does the bear minimum.

Is it a stupid topic and reason to break up or not?

We’re trying to make it work and I know we both care a lot for each other. It can be he messed up and was scared to tell me but it is giving him excuses if I decide that and he isn’t even speaking to me.

We were going to have a date tonight with my birthday money (we can’t really spend on frivolous things in the day to day because of financial reasons) but now I don’t want to because I found a lot of soda bottles in his desk (we can’t afford that) and a box of burgers (we can’t afford that and even if we had he tried to hide it from me so I wouldn’t know so no share?).

We combine finances and everything I earn is used for us and now I learn about this, he could say it’s from his work tips but even tho we’re struggling and he hide it from me. Am I crazy?

I sometimes go out and drink with my friends.

Sometimes it can be coffee shop, pubs and even thai discos. however, I am worried. I am afraid that my wife will ask me to show her my credit card statement.

If she see the statement she sure know I go siam diu, the question is.

If you use a credit card at a Thai disco, will it show as a liquor store on the statement?

I don’t want her to see me spend few hundred dollar hanging flower. Is there anyway to hide? She checks my statement every now and then.

Here are what netizens think:

• When a company sets up a facility to process credit cards, they are asked what should show on customers credit card statements. Some banks insist on the company name being on the credit card statement (in an effort to reduce fraud) Most business in the “sin industries” are aware of spouses and accounting departments reviewing credit card statements, and so register companies with vague names (eg, “Phoenix holdings”). Doing a Google search may connect the vague company name with the actual service being bought, however.
  
• Best is to ask the cashier – they will be certain to have been asked this question before, and it’s in their interest to be truthful.

• Want to play use cash la, don’t leave a paper trail

A friend borrowed from me a few months ago when he had nothing.

He bought expensive computer parts and game skins instead of paying me ASAP. Now that I needed the money, he went on pulling a scammer move by ignoring my messages and getting angry with me.

My friend (22m) borrowed money from me (21m) a few months ago when he had nothing. I even let him stay in our house because they really had nothing at that time. We were friends for 4 years now. We used to go together to different sidelines such as photoshoots.

When he was almost getting out of his loans from other people, I told him he could pay me later because I still do not need the money. I advised him to invest in equipments first before doing anything because he recently sold his camera in order to pay the loans and buy another money-earning equipment.

I was expecting that he would not pull off a grand show of buying expensive parts but he still did instead of buying entry-level parts and then paying me. He then went on his stupid decisions and proceeded on buying something that he did not need such as a gaming mouse, a second monitor, weapon skins on a game, and high quality speakers. I was disappointed but I did not pay much attention because I thought he could pay me in time. So I gave him a deadline (which is a month away) because I will need the money before July. Now that the deadline is over, he then blabbered about he was rejected by this girl or they had no money AGAIN and went on telling me his personal problems instead of paying me.

I got angry and then he pulled off his habit of ignoring the message of someone he doesnt want to interact with. A typical scammer move. I feel like he was stepping on me and telling to himself that “its just OP, ill pay him next time”. I really needed the money and I feel bad for cutting ties with him.

I also heard that he cant pay his electric bills and still owns money to others which are far more greater than mine. What should I do?

I (f21) don’t understand this dynamic. Why the fact my friend has now a girlfriend have to do with stop talking to me, hanging out or spend time together??

Before he had a girlfriend (a friend of mine) we were inseparable, talked a lot and enjoyed time together.

I don’t have any special or romantic interest in him, plus I already have a bf. But I’m so tired of this dynamic. He doesn’t tell me to hang out, he cancelled the last times we were about to meet up…

I helped him to go through a recent break-up (really bad one), spend time with him so he could have support, but now he has a girlfriend and has kinda forgotten about me.

I had to distance myself from them because they can’t handle a healthy relationship to start with.

She gets jealous as soon as he starts spending time with me (talking, sitting next to eachother), and it’s pretty unfair. I told both of them I don’t have ANY intentions with him… yet today, I heard he changed uni group classes without telling me, leaving me alone (he knows I have a little bit of social anxiety). He changed to the group class all my other friends group was, and we chose that one because there were no spots at the start of semester… and now I’m alone. I don’t know man, I can’t see him as a friend anymore and it hurts me so bad. I know it has nothing to do with the girlfriend, but the fact he has a girlfriend. I’ve never been friends with a lot of people, and it’s hard to me to create a connection.

It’s unfair I lost the only friend I connected with, and I’m kinda sad.

(Sorry for the rant, kinda mad rn)

I work in a very male dominated industry. While my specific job role is nearly 50/50, the type of industry that I am currently based in is on average 90% male.

I 21f have a colleague who doesn’t like to follow rules and regulations.